The somatic experience of love in my body was unhealthy. What I felt and called love was not actually love, and it took me years to see it. In this episode I lay out the two things we're all doing without noticing. We're running from something, and we're running toward something, and the thing we navigate by is what we feel. What I was running from was a home where I never saw passion. What I was running toward was the passion I only ever felt in the movies. That set the feeling in my body to point at intensity instead of love. What finally changed is that I stopped chasing passion and started choosing peace. I found a partner who helps regulate my nervous system instead of spiking it, and I had to learn to trust how quiet that feels. We get into why the feeling you trust most is often the least reliable, why secure love can feel like something's missing at first, and what it's taken to finally trust it. Crazy Love is fifteen years of my journals, the poems and the heartbreak that taught me all of this. Get Your Copy: https://www.adamroa.com/crazylove

You cannot have a healthy relationship without safe communication. Here's how to give your partner hard feedback without it turning into a fight, using a six-step method I call the six Rs. If this topic stirred something in you, check out my 2.5 hour masterclass on modern dating: https://www.adamroa.com/modern-dating-is-broken And if you're interested in my new book, you can find it here: https://www.adamroa.com/crazylove

We treat "marry the person you love" like the oldest rule there is. It's about 200 years old. In this episode I dig into where the idea of marrying for love actually came from, why building a lifelong commitment on a feeling, the most volatile thing we experience, makes modern love so unstable, and what might actually hold two people together when the feeling goes quiet. I share some of my own story too, the years I spent confusing love with a feeling that comes and goes. It's one piece of my Modern Dating Is Broken masterclass. The full conversation is here: www.AdamRoa.com/modern-dating-is-broken

I burned out at the end of last year. So I did something I had never done in 13 years of building this thing. I stopped. And when I came back to promote my book, I hit a wall of resistance I couldn't think my way through. Instead of forcing it, I got quiet and asked what the resistance was actually protecting. This video is the honest version of what I found. The ego death. The identity I had to loosen my grip on after 13 years. And the practical steps I took to figure out what I actually want to build next. If you're in your own transition right now, this one is for you. The Soul Scavenger Hunt is a free self-reflection experience to help you hear what your own resistance is pointing you toward. https://create.adamroa.com/soul-scavenger-hunt And my book, Crazy Love, is on its way. Poems and raw journal entries about love, heartbreak, and healing. I can't wait to put it in your hands. https://www.adamroa.com/crazylove

"Where did all the good men go?" Women ask it constantly, and the honest answer is harder than either side wants to admit: a lot of good men didn't turn bad. They quietly walked away. In this episode I break down what's really happening to men in modern dating, why the bar we're asking them to clear became impossible in a single generation, with no role models and no map, and why it isn't the fault of anyone the way we tend to think. It's one piece of my Modern Dating Is Broken masterclass. If it lands, the full conversation goes deeper here: https://www.adamroa.com/modern-dating-is-broken 

I posted a one-minute video telling men to get in shape. Women in the comments said it was bad advice. One of them said women don't want the gym bro with big biceps. They want the kind, emotionally intelligent man with the dad bod. The response says so much about the state of masculine/feminine relationships right now and points to why men are struggling to understand what to do. This podcast breaks down this situation from a variety of angles and aims to help you spot the dangerous thought patterns before you fall victim to them. This Sunday I'm hosting a free live masterclass called Modern Dating Is Broken. This video is the foundation for that conversation. If it landed for you, come deeper. https://www.adamroa.com/modern-dating-is-broken  

This is a hard one to post. For ten years, I had something I could only call God. I found it outside the church, in places that surprised me, through experiences that changed me. For the last year and a half, I've been searching for it again. I made this video because I didn't want to keep pretending I have it figured out. If you're somewhere in the in-between too, maybe this is for you. The Soul Scavenger Hunt is a free experience I made to help you find what's real in yourself: https://create.adamroa.com/soul-scavenger-hunt My debut book Crazy Love comes out soon: https://www.adamroa.com/crazylove

In this episode I share a framework I've used for years to establish safe containers for intimacy. It sounds unsexy, but it has led to some of the most pleasurable experiences of my life. If you want to go deeper into what you actually desire before your next conversation like this, this is where I'd start: Soul Scavenger Hunt (free) — a guided experience for getting underneath the surface of what you want. https://create.adamroa.com/soul-scavenger-hunt My debut book Crazy Love is coming soon: https://www.adamroa.com/crazylove

This is the follow-up to my podcast on what a man provides. Because a woman provides four pillars of safety too. Physical. Mental. Emotional. Spiritual. They just look different. And most people are too afraid, too politicized, or too unaware to say what they actually are. If you love a man and want to understand what he's actually carrying, this one is for you. If you are a man who has never been able to name what you needed, maybe this helps. If this opens something in you, the Soul Scavenger Hunt was built for exactly this. It's free. https://create.adamroa.com/soul-scavenger-hunt My debut book, Crazy Love, is coming out soon. Join the waitlist: https://www.adamroa.com/crazylove

Something changed in this relationship that hadn't changed in any of the ones before it. Being the man finally felt natural. And it made me ask a question I hadn't been willing to sit with: what am I actually here to provide? This podcast is my answer. Not a position on gender roles. Not a defense of any label or movement. This is an explanation of what I've found to be the 4 key pillars I can provide to my partner in order to create a healthy relationship. If this lands and you want to start with yourself, the Soul Scavenger Hunt is exactly that kind of inner work. https://create.adamroa.com/soul-scavenger-hunt  My debut poetry book Crazy Love is coming soon. A deep dive into the journey of love and relationships: https://www.adamroa.com/crazylove