This is an episode about parenting and recovery. How do I talk to my kids about my own story? How do I protect them from repeating my mistakes? How do I give them the feeling of safety that I didn’t have when I was young? What do I do if I recognize patterns of behavior in them, that I’ve tried to fix in myself? Erin Khar is a writer and advocate. She’s the author of the memoir Strung Out and the advice column Ask Erin. She’s thought a lot about these questions and I think she’s got a lot of smart things to say. We talk about the problem with “tough love,” the difficulty of not projecting onto your kids and how to model communication, not perfection. Oh, and accidentally becoming addicted to baseball cards. 00:00:00 Parenting in recovery and honest communication 00:05:00 Early warning signs and childhood anxiety 00:10:00 Separating parental trauma from your child's reality 00:15:00 Breaking intergenerational cycles of family guilt 00:20:00 Challenging tough love with compassionate boundaries 00:25:00 Overcoming shame and the fear of being seen 00:30:00 Processing maternal relationships and inherited pain 00:35:00 Early mental health struggles and childhood abuse 00:40:00 Addiction as emotional control rather than escape 00:45:00 Unresolved adolescent wounds and relationship patterns 00:50:00 Modeling imperfection and accepting parental flaws 00:55:00 Unconditional love and building safe environments #ErinKhar #ParentingSober #LongTermRecovery #EmotionalRegulation #BreakingCycles #ParentingTips #FamilyDynamics #RecoveryMonth #MentalHealth #EmpatheticParenting Topics: Parenting in recovery and emotional growth Inoculating children against trauma Giving up the illusion of parental control Separating your past from your child Open communication and building trust Breaking intergenerational family cycles Reframing addiction and mental health Emotional control versus escape mechanisms Modeling imperfection and vulnerability Creating safe environments for children September recovery month content New episodes release every Wednesday. ➡️ Subscribe to The Small Bow Podcast YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@TheSmallBow?sub_confirmation=1 ➡️ Join The Small Bow Community: https://www.thesmallbow.com/ ➡️ Get the latest on The Small Bow: https://linktr.ee/THESMALLBOW ➡️ Download The Small Bow Podcast on Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-small-bow-podcast/id1576208098

Sometimes I think I either want to join a cult or start a cult. Tommy Rosen definitely has cult leader charisma, but if you peel back that air of authority, you realize he’s just a guy that’s been seriously kicked around by life and arrived at a place where he wants to help as many people as possible. Tommy is the founder of Recovery 2.0, an organization that hosts Yoga-informed Recovery workshops and retreats all over the world. He’s helped me in private conversation and this episode is really practical — we talk about meditation techniques, prayers that work, what to do when your mom moves in with you and how to ease your 1 AM craving for Captain Crunch. Recovery 2.0 has programming every day during Recovery Month (which is September in case you didn’t know.) Check out their website for more info: https://r20.com/. 00:00:00 Defining baseline anxiety and portals to addiction 00:06:14 Navigating family triggers and setting healthier dynamics 00:12:22 The science of fun, movement, and daily routines 00:18:26 Transcending cultural influence and avoiding manipulation 00:24:36 Morning prayers, setting intentions, and spiritual practices 00:30:47 Shifting perspective on gratitude and finding beauty in presence 00:36:58 Building discipline, consistency, and devotion in life 00:43:02 Moving from simple abstinence to true recovery 00:49:12 Understanding codependency and healing the lost self 00:55:22 Overcoming ego attachment and accepting the present moment 01:01:32 Integrating meditation and yoga to change your mental state 01:07:42 Practical sleep strategies and breathwork for insomnia #TommyRosen #Recovery #TheSmallBow #AddictionRecovery #YogaInRecovery #12StepProgram #PracticalSpirituality #NervousSystemRegulation #SobrietyJourney #MindfulLiving Topics: Defining recovery beyond drug and alcohol addiction Addressing childhood roots of anxiety and fixations Applying yoga practices and principles to 12 steps Navigating societal influences and cultivating free thought Balancing personal recovery with ambition and platform Using daily prayer and devotion for grounded living Navigating the codependency portal in long-term sobriety Managing ego, public status, and financial backlash Utilizing yoga and breathwork for nervous system regulation Building sustainable discipline to transform daily habits New episodes release every Wednesday. ➡️ Subscribe to The Small Bow Podcast YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@TheSmallBow?sub_confirmation=1 ➡️ Join The Small Bow Community: https://www.thesmallbow.com/ ➡️ Get the latest on The Small Bow: https://linktr.ee/THESMALLBOW ➡️ Download The Small Bow Podcast on Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-small-bow-podcast/id1576208098

This week, Kathryn Jezer-Morton joins the show to talk about emotional sobriety and the internet. Kathryn writes about digital culture and parenting for many publications, including her fantastic biweekly column for The Cut called “Brooding.” Her new book on social media is called The Story of Your Life. Emotional sobriety is this term that gets used to describe how we manage and regulate difficult emotions without our substance-of-choice. For me, the internet (and social media in particular) challenges my emotional sobriety on a regular basis. Luckily, I’ve got Kathryn to help me manage the temptations and pitfalls of being alive, online. Join us as we talk portals, friction-maxxing and meditation and try our best to go viral, without losing our way. 00:00:00 Self-promotion realities and writing for dad00:02:18 Defining emotional sobriety in the digital age00:04:03 Storytelling vs. social media in the story of your life00:05:30 Navigating self-promotion without getting lost00:10:15 Writing about social media vs. storytelling00:11:39 How photo sharing changed in the carousel era00:31:26 Entering uncomfortable rooms in recovery and writing00:35:55 Checking launch day book sales in the publisher portal00:37:00 Unlearning academic training and handling critiques00:38:53 Zooming in on personal history and commune childhoods00:50:30 The brand trap of crafting a public persona00:57:57 Writing without a master plan#KathrynJezerMorton #TheStoryOfYourLife #EmotionalSobriety #BroodingColumn #DigitalDetox #SocialMediaCulture #ScreenTimeBoundaries #ActiveGrieving #ParentingInTheDigitalAge #AuthorInterview #Sociology #Mindfulness Topics:Emotional sobriety in the digital age Managing your ego's inner bureaucrat The sickness of author self-promotion Why social media is like a drugBook launch reality and sales portals How grief enhances sensory noticing Escaping the New York media bubble Parenting rules for phone meditation Rejecting the redemption narrative Writing memoirs vs academic sociologyNew episodes release every Wednesday. ➡️ Subscribe to The Small Bow Podcast YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@TheSmallBow?sub_confirmation=1 ➡️ Join The Small Bow Community: https://www.thesmallbow.com/ ➡️ Get the latest on The Small Bow: https://linktr.ee/THESMALLBOW ➡️ Download The Small Bow Podcast on Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-small-bow-podcast/id1576208098

Anna Holmes could walk into any newsroom and immediately run the show. She created and ran Jezebel while I was at Gawker and her writing has appeared in The Atlantic, The New Yorker and The New York Times, where she formerly wrote the weekly “Work Friend” column for the Sunday Business Section. But as we discuss in this interview, she still struggles with feelings of inadequacy. In this conversation, we discuss Anna’s foray into dating apps and the ways that later-in-life sexual exploration helped her grieve both the death of her ex-husband and the loss of her mother, including the bizarre moment her Apple Watch recorded the moment of her mother’s death. Plus, rage bacon, corpse makeup and learning lessons from other peoples’ kids. Anna’s new book The Power of No is out September 15. 00:00:00 The Feeld App & Latex Story 00:04:15 Apple Watch Tracked Heart Rate During Loss 00:08:40 Writing the New Yorker Piece & Middle-Aged Celibacy 00:13:00 Processing Divorce & Ex-Husband’s Sudden Death 00:17:15 High Career Achievement vs Internal Insecurity 00:21:20 Facing Parental Illness & Emotional Avoidance 00:25:30 Grief, Family Tension, & Attending End-of-Life 00:30:00 Final Moments With Mom & The Physiology of Loss 00:34:30 The Apple Watch Alert at the Moment of Death 00:38:40 Holding Grudges, Resentment, & Anger at Self 00:43:00 Accessing Joy, Gratitude, & Curiosity 00:47:10 Overcoming Writer's Block & Writing The Power of No #AnnaHolmes #NYTWriter #Columnist #ThePowerOfNo #DatingInYour50s #WritingProcess #SelfDoubt #Jezebel #WorkFriend #ImposterSyndrome #Grief #DatingAfterLoss #Reinvention Topics: Living a double life in media Trashing 300 pages of a book High accomplishment vs low worth Unlearning adolescent insecurity Overcoming fear of being a phony Shame, divorce, and self-worth Breaking destructive habit loops Finding freedom through truth Navigating grief and tech data Cutting tethers and moving on New episodes release every Wednesday. ➡️ Subscribe to The Small Bow Podcast YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@TheSmallBow?sub_confirmation=1 ➡️ Join The Small Bow Community: https://www.thesmallbow.com/ ➡️ Get the latest on The Small Bow: https://linktr.ee/THESMALLBOW ➡️ Download The Small Bow Podcast on Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-small-bow-podcast/id1576208098

Queen Conny is 96 years old and not afraid to die. She gets angry, she holds onto grudges and she has no tolerance for liars. She’s also got 18 virtual reality boyfriends and killer style. She’s been sober for 48 years and while she hasn’t always loved AA, she credits it with changing her relationship with God. This is NOT a conversation about aging gracefully. It’s a conversation about getting older and accepting that even at 96, you may still yell at someone at the grocery store. 00:00:00 Connie Caruso is 96 years old, 48 years sober 00:04:10 Forgiving past relationships, letting go of grudges, and personal boundaries 00:08:05 Accepting love, and the power of recovery 00:12:30 Why pain is a teacher and navigating relationships 00:16:30 The practice of humility, staying useful, and accepting help 00:20:50 Dealing with a short temper, controlling impulsive rage 00:25:00 Reconnecting with faith, daily prayer, and releasing ego 00:29:15 Accepting physical limitations, and staying mentally active 00:33:30 12-step, sponsorship, and real honesty in recovery 00:37:45 Building emotional resilience and continuous growth 00:42:00 Spiritual surrender and learning to get out of God's way 00:46:15 Finding peace, gratitude, and lasting transformation #SpiritualSurrender #12StepWisdom #LongTermSobriety #OvercomingRage #AgingWithGrace #AcceptingLove #Gratitude #PainIsGood #TheSmallBow #ContinuousSobriety #48YearsSober Topics: Overcoming rage and impulsive anger 48 years of continuous sobriety Living without fear of death Forgiving past resentments Learning how pain is a teacher Finding spiritual surrender Managing aging and physical limits The practice of true humility Being of service in recovery Learning to like yourself New episodes release every Wednesday. ➡️ Subscribe to The Small Bow Podcast YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@TheSmallBow?sub_confirmation=1 ➡️ Join The Small Bow Community: https://www.thesmallbow.com/ ➡️ Get the latest on The Small Bow: https://linktr.ee/THESMALLBOW ➡️ Download The Small Bow Podcast on Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-small-bow-podcast/id1576208098

This week on The Small Bow Podcast, you’re invited to join us for a Small Bow Meeting. A Small Bow Meeting is not a 12-step meeting, but we rip off most of their format. It is not necessary for participants to identify as an alcoholic or addict. This meeting is open to people who suffer from issues related to mental illness, drugs, love, sex, food, debt, codependency, inadequacy, or anything else that’s bringing you down. I want to extend a special note of thanks to everyone who participated in this meeting with the knowledge that their voice and likeness would be aired publicly, including our featured speaker, Emily Gould. Small Bow Meetings are typically anonymous, but today’s participants agreed, in the spirit of service, to share this meeting with you. Thanks to them, and thanks for being here. Small Bow Meetings happen seven days a week, over zoom. For info and to join, go to: www.thesmallbow.com/meetings 00:00:00 How non-denominational recovery works 00:03:16 Introducing guest speaker Emily Gould 00:08:09 Emily Gould on late-night scrolling, caffeine, and self-sabotage 00:22:21 Finding community when traditional 12-step isn't enough 00:28:30 Rebuilding self-worth and letting go of perfectionism 00:33:17 Learning to forgive yourself for past mistakes 00:35:31 Surviving public shame and quiet line-crossing 00:40:27 Reclaiming identity and daily peace after treatment 00:44:21 Vulnerability, fear of failure, and breaking isolation 00:51:33 Unlearning people pleasing and emotional defense mechanisms 01:00:29 Reflecting on 10 years of continuous sobriety 01:01:37 Closing the meeting with clear eyes and full hearts #EmilyGould #EMDRTherapy #EmotionalSobriety #Non12Step #SelfForgiveness #PublicShame #RecoveryMeeting #OpenMeeting #SpeakerMeeting #SoberCurious #AddictionRecovery Topics: The ""Being Sober"" Problem Emily Gould on EMDR Therapy Reframing Alcohol as a Solution Why Connection Cures Addiction Overcoming Public Shaming & Guilt Actionable Self-Forgiveness Tools Non-Denominational Recovery Rooms How EMDR Speed-Runs Trauma Emotional Sobriety Explained Healing After the Gawker Era New episodes release every Wednesday. ➡️ Subscribe to The Small Bow Podcast YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@TheSmallBow?sub_confirmation=1 ➡️ Join The Small Bow Community: https://www.thesmallbow.com/ ➡️ Get the latest on The Small Bow: https://linktr.ee/THESMALLBOW ➡️ Download The Small Bow Podcast on Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-small-bow-podcast/id1576208098

Swamp Dogg is a country, soul and R&B singer, musician, songwriter and record producer. He has influenced multiple generations of musicians with his defiantly idiosyncratic discography and has been described by Pitchfork as one of “pop’s great cult acts.” He also happens to sing The Small Bow theme song. He stopped by the studio to discuss his long career, his lifelong search for happiness, and his new album Swamp Dogg Contemplates the Afterlife. I tried to get him to contemplate the afterlife in this conversation, but he wasn’t in the mood. That said, it’s always a pleasure to spend time with a true original— when you get in the room with Swamp Dogg, you never know where you’ll wind up. 00:00:00 Finding true happiness beyond material things 00:01:21 How a random email turned into a 12-year friendship 00:02:00 Behind the new album Swamp Dogg Contemplates the Afterlife 00:05:54 Personal views on God, heaven, and eternal punishment 00:07:26 The story behind writing the podcast theme song 00:09:26 Debunking the famous LSD origin story 00:10:58 Comparing music legends John Prine, Bob Dylan, and Bon Iver 00:13:42 The realities of touring and redefining true success 00:18:01 Facing a childhood curse and surviving past age 21 00:22:20 Learning to ask for help while living your dreams 00:25:39 Why cursing is a family tradition and catching up to Samuel L. Jackson 00:37:00 Clarifying the Jane Fonda movie rumors and future collaboration ideas #SwampDogg #TheAfterLife #NewAlbum #SoulMusicLegend #BonIverCollab IfYouKillItCookbook #AcidStory #MTVLegacy #RadicalThinker #ThoughtsOnGod #JaneFonda#SwampDoggContemplatesTheAfterlife Topics: Recording a new album The afterlife, God, heaven and hell Working with Bon Iver Loving John Prine's music Playing records for Bob Dylan Meeting Jane Fonda Reaching age 84 in the music industry Writing the podcast theme Performing at the Grammys Tour life and live success Redefining success as a star Publishing a cookbook New episodes release every Wednesday. ➡️ Subscribe to The Small Bow Podcast YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@TheSmallBow?sub_confirmation=1 ➡️ Join The Small Bow Community: https://www.thesmallbow.com/ ➡️ Get the latest on The Small Bow: https://linktr.ee/THESMALLBOW ➡️ Download The Small Bow Podcast on Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-small-bow-podcast/id1576208098

Megan Koester is a writer and stand-up comedian who isn’t writing and won’t promote her stand-up. In my opinion, she should be doing more of both of those things but hey, it’s not up to me. I wanted to have Megan back on the show to talk about self-sabotage and becoming your own worst enemy. Plus, being an atheist in recovery rooms, EMDR and weaponized trauma and how to use craigslist ephemera as self-promotion. New episodes release every Wednesday. ➡️ Subscribe to The Small Bow Podcast YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@TheSmallBow?sub_confirmation=1 ➡️ Join The Small Bow Community: https://www.thesmallbow.com/ ➡️ Get the latest on The Small Bow: https://linktr.ee/THESMALLBOW ➡️ Download The Small Bow Podcast on Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-small-bow-podcast/id1576208098 00:00:00 Resenting Your Gifts and Half-Assing Comedy 00:01:06 Why I Hate Video Podcasts 00:02:00 What is EMDR Therapy? 00:04:00 Understanding Childhood Neglect and CPTSD 00:05:30 Dissociation, Trauma, and Coping Mechanisms 00:06:30 The Reality of Relapse and Alcohol Addiction 00:07:52 Desperation, Mental Health, and "The Body Keeps the Score" 00:09:34 Seeking Validation and Re-Parenting Yourself 00:12:12 Overcoming Creative Self-Sabotage and Minimization 00:14:14 An Agnostic View on Spiritual Healing 00:21:00 Navigating the Hollywood Entertainment Industry 00:26:00 Defining Success, Sobriety, and Artistic Expression

When I want to know what’s going on in Hollywood, I turn to Richard Rushfield. Richard is a columnist for the Ankler, his influential newsletter about the state of the entertainment industry. He is also sober, and decided to stop by our show on his 30th sobriety anniversary. We talk about how sobriety has changed his work ethic and made him more comfortable in his own skin. We also discuss the state of sobriety in Hollywood: from Shia Labeouf to Matthew Perry and why it may take a “Me-Too” size reckoning for the industry to kick its addiction to child labor. 00:00:00 Richard Rushfield and 30 years of sobriety 00:02:11 The ""working lush"" era and early journalism 00:07:00 The cost of insurance and uninsurable stars 00:11:12 Corporate Hollywood and post Me Too HR 00:14:13 Matthew Perry, AA, and recovery in the media 00:17:28 The systemic pathology of child stardom 00:22:54 Celebrity downfalls and the media spectacle 00:25:02 Power, influence, and writing for The Ankler 00:31:05 Navigating social anxiety without alcohol 00:35:40 Leaning into fear: Flying and ego 00:41:02 How to stay sober: Daily prayer and service 00:43:39 The infamous bathroom shoving match with Phish #RichardRushfield #TheAnkler #LongTermRecovery #30YearsSober #Phish #ShowerPrayer #SocialAnxiety #ChildStars Topics: Thirty years of sobriety milestones Hollywood's view on uninsurability Robert Downey Jr.'s industry return Modern Hollywood's corporate shift Matthew Perry's recovery legacy The systemic toll of child acting Lack of data on child actors Proposed labor limits for minors Media focus on celebrity downfalls Challenges in reporting misconduct Fighting social anxiety at parties Shoving match and false predictions New episodes release every Wednesday. ➡️ Subscribe to The Small Bow Podcast YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@TheSmallBow?sub_confirmation=1 ➡️ Join The Small Bow Community: https://www.thesmallbow.com/ ➡️ Get the latest on The Small Bow: https://linktr.ee/THESMALLBOW ➡️ Download The Small Bow Podcast on Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-small-bow-podcast/id1576208098

For this episode of The Small Bow Podcast, my friend Peaceful John joins the show to answer some of your questions about recovery. It should be obvious pretty quickly why I call him Peaceful John. We talk about how to set boundaries with aging parents, how to avoid turning your grief into a weapon, how to care less, how to feel more… basically how to deal with your own sh*t. Thanks to everyone who wrote in (I may have snuck some questions in myself) and thanks to John for showing up and providing some answers. For this episode of The Small Bow Podcast, my friend Peaceful John joins the show to answer some of your questions about recovery. It should be obvious pretty quickly why I call him Peaceful John. We talk about how to set boundaries with aging parents, how to avoid turning your grief into a weapon, how to care less, how to feel more… basically how to deal with your own sh*t. Thanks to everyone who wrote in (I may have snuck some questions in myself) and thanks to John for showing up and providing some answers. Topics: 12-Step & Adult Child Recovery Healing Your Inner "Asshole" Honor Resentment Before Peace The Rescuer Complex Trap Detaching with Love vs. Malice Radical Acceptance: Naming Ugly Career Success & Self-Esteem Intimacy Is Most Terrifying When Grief Becomes a Weapon Aging, Dating & Sexual Honesty New episodes release every Wednesday. ➡️ Subscribe to The Small Bow Podcast YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@TheSmallBow?sub_confirmation=1 ➡️ Join The Small Bow Community: https://www.thesmallbow.com/ ➡️ Get the latest on The Small Bow: https://linktr.ee/THESMALLBOW ➡️ Download The Small Bow Podcast on Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-small-bow-podcast/id1576208098