The Rare Life
The Rare Life
Madeline Cheney
This is the real, raw, and all the feels of loving a child with disabilities. Episodes feature parent-guests, professionals, and solo episodes with host Madeline Cheney. Their authentic conversations don’t shy away from the strong and mixed emotions that often accompany medically-complex parenting. Parents listen in to feel seen, validated, and receive much-needed solidarity. Professionals working with disabled people listen in to better understand what is often going on under the surface for a family living with disabilities.
233: PTSD | What It Looks Like + Why It’s So Prevalent for Disability Parents w/ Amanda Griffith-Atkins
A hospital admission. A seizure. A certain time of year. Sometimes your body can react to medical trauma long after the moment itself has passed. But when does that become PTSD, and what does that look like when the trauma is tied to your child’s medical care?In today’s episode, Amanda Griffith-Atkins joins us to break down the difference between PTSD, post-traumatic stress symptoms, and other trauma responses, plus why things like hypervigilance, avoidance, feeling trapped, and physical reactions to reminders can show up so strongly for medical parents.We also dig into what makes trauma especially complicated when you have to keep returning to the hospital or facing new medical crises, how treatment options like EMDR and medication can help, and why you don’t need an official PTSD diagnosis for your trauma to deserve attention.And a big thanks to our sponsor for this episode, themakers of the incredible documentary, The Zebra & The Bear!Links:Watch The Zebra & The BearListen to Ep 185: Medical Parent Trauma.Fill out our contact form to join upcoming discussion groups!Join The Rare Life newsletter and never miss an update!Follow Amanda on Instagram @amanda.griffith.atkins!Follow us on Instagram @the_rare_life!Donate to the podcast or Contact me about sponsoring an episode.Amanda’s Episodes:81: Health Anxiety85: Should A Child’s Disability be Part of Their Parents’ Identity? 99: Family Planning108: Holidays + Disability109: Isolating During Holidays 110: Inpatient During Holidays130: Fearful of Childloss 131: Chronic Stress + Our Bodies 132: When Self-Care Gives Us the Swears135: Ways Career + Family Roles Can Be Affected by Disability 142: What If My Disabled Child Outlives Me?147: Sex + Disability Parenting 153: Hurtful Things Loved Ones Say and Do156: Should I Get Divorced?159: Mental-Load Sharing with Your Partner171: Financial Strain 182: Hobbies 189: Grief in Disability Parenting 203: Strengthening Marriage 222: Intellectual Disabilities
Oct 1
58 min
232: Exercise + Disability Parents
Exercise can be a powerful coping tool, a way to feel stronger, and something that improves our mental health as parents of disabled children. But for those in our community, it can also be hard to access, hard to sustain, and just one more thing on our never-ending to-do list.In today’s episode, we’re talking about that tension: the ways exercise has helped so many parents cope with stress, anger, trauma, and the physical demands of caregiving, alongside the very real barriers of time, energy, money, childcare, and hospital stays.We also dig into body image, identity, losing routines you once loved, and why “just make it a priority” doesn’t capture the reality of caregiving. No matter your relationship to exercise, this episode has something for everyone.Links:Listen to Ep. 142: What If My Disabled Child Outlives Me?Fill out our contact form to join upcoming discussion groups!Join The Rare Life newsletter and never miss an update!Follow us on Instagram @the_rare_life!Donate to the podcast or Contact me about sponsoring an episode.
Sep 24
56 min
231: Numbing Out | When Disability Parents Need a Break From Reality
Scrolling. Comfort shows. Exercise. Reading. Keeping yourself so busy you don’t have time to think. Numbing out can look a lot of different ways.In today’s episode, we’re talking about why medical parents numb out, especially during stressful seasons, before and after scary medical moments, and after long days of being “on” for everyone else.We also dig into the difference between numbing out and dissociation, how to tell when distraction is helping versus becoming avoidance, and why sometimes giving your brain a break is exactly what you need.Also, a big thank you to Functional Formularies, oursponsor for this episode. Links:Learn more about Functional Formularies!Listen to Ep 182: Hobbies for Disability Parents.Fill out our contact form to join upcoming discussion groups!Join The Rare Life newsletter and never miss an update!Follow us on Instagram @the_rare_life!Donate to the podcast or Contact me about sponsoring an episode. 
Sep 17
45 min
230: Amanda’s Story | Medical-Parent Anxiety, Fear of the Future + 17 Years of Perspective
When your first child is medically complex, your experience can look very different from a “typical” parent. But sometimes, that’s only really apparent in hindsight.In today’s episode, we (finally!) have Amanda Griffith-Atkins on to share the story of her and her son Asher. From the first inkling that something wasn’t quite right to navigating conflicting messages and fears about the future to what her life looks like now seventeen years later, Amanda shares it all.We also dig into that moment where you realize you have to share diagnostic news with your friends and family, how having typical children later brought up grief for moments she and Asher missed out on, and how the way disabled children are portrayed in medical settings influences parents and can contribute to fear.This episode has it all! You won't want to miss it.Links:Check out Amanda's past episodes on TRL!81: Health Anxiety85: Should A Child’s Disability be Part of Their Parents’ Identity? 99: Family Planning108: Holidays + Disability109: Isolating During Holidays 110: Inpatient During Holidays130: Fearful of Childloss 131: Chronic Stress + Our Bodies 132: When Self-Care Gives Us the Swears135: Ways Career + Family Roles Can Be Affected by Disability 142: What If My Disabled Child Outlives Me?147: Sex + Disability Parenting 153: Hurtful Things Loved Ones Say and Do156: Should I Get Divorced?159: Mental-Load Sharing with Your Partner171: Financial Strain 182: Hobbies 189: Grief in Disability Parenting 203: Strengthening Marriage 222: Intellectual Disabilities Fill out our contact form to join upcoming discussion groups!Join The Rare Life newsletter and never miss an update!Follow Amanda on Instagram @amanda.griffith.atkins!Follow us on Instagram @the_rare_life!Donate to the podcast or Contact me about sponsoring an episode.
Sep 10
38 min
229: Season 14 Kickoff | Our Board Retreat, Summer Recaps + Sneak Peeks
Season 14 is here, and this time the focus is on how raising a disabled or medically complex child impacts us as people.This season, we’ll be talking about things like anxiety, PTSD, identity, feeling like your body failed your child, numbing out and dissociation, exercise, and being seen as a “Debbie Downer” when you’re honest about the realities of this life. As always, we’ll also have story episodes woven throughout the season, including a long-overdue story episode with Amanda Griffith-Atkins.We’re also sharing some behind-the-scenes updates in this episode, including how Madeline and Alyssa are splitting hosting and production this season, our first in-person board retreat in Maine, and a little of what we’ve been up to over the summer.Finally, we’re wrapping up this season opener with clips from the first few episodes. Don’t miss it!Links:Access the NICU Survival Guide here or at https://therarelife.org/nicuguide.Listen to Ep 81: Health Anxiety.Listen to Ep 85: Should A Child’s Disability be Part of Their Parent’s Identity?  w/ Emily Ladau.Fill out our contact form to join upcoming discussion groups!Join The Rare Life newsletter and never miss an update!Follow us on Instagram @the_rare_life!Donate to the podcast or Contact me about sponsoring an episode.
Sep 3
25 min
New Launch: The NICU Survival Guide w/ Cindy Reinhard and Ashley Caywood (Summer Mini #10)
It’s finally here! For the last year and a half, we’ve been working on this project to be a big hug for NICU families from parents who just get it. In this episode, we’re sharing our NICU Guide for the first time, why we created it, who it’s for, and how you can help get it into the hands of families who need it the most.If you’d like to help, send us a message on Instagram, ontherarelife.org/contact or by emailing us directly at [email protected] huge thank you to our sponsor for this summer season, Real Food Blends! Real Food Blends are the only 100% real food meals thatare ready-to-feed for people with feeding tubes. Offering 8 different meals and 1 snack for adults & kids, it's the closest thing to homemade blenderized tube feeding. Learn more at realfoodblends.com!Links:Access the NICU Survival Guide here.Get involved with distribution efforts by emailing us [email protected] out our contact form to join upcoming discussion groups!Join The Rare Life newsletter and never miss an update!Follow us on Instagram @the_rare_life!Donate to the podcast or Contact me about sponsoring an episode. 
Aug 13
23 min
When You and Your Child are Both Medically Complex with Sarah (Summer Mini #9)
Imagine this: You’ve just finished going through the diagnostic process for your child’s rare disease. You’re trying to find your new normal. And in the midst of all this, you continue to uncover your own medical complexities. That story isn’t foreign to Sarah, our guest in today’s episode. She shares both her and her daughter’s diagnostic journey, how that impacts their life in unique ways, and why she’s ultimately thankful to be able to understand her daughter’s struggles.A huge thank you to our sponsor for this summer season, Real Food Blends! Real Food Blends are the only 100% real food meals thatare ready-to-feed for people with feeding tubes. Offering 8 different meals and 1 snack for adults & kids, it's the closest thing to homemade blenderized tube feeding. Learn more at realfoodblends.com!Links:Fill out our contact form to join upcoming discussion groups!Join The Rare Life newsletter and never miss an update!Follow us on Instagram @the_rare_life!Donate to the podcast or Contact me about sponsoring an episode. 
Aug 6
20 min
Single Medical Parenting w/ Danielle (Summer Mini #8)
Parenting a medically complex child without a partner or co-parent can bring a new level of difficulty. From managing the financial realities of a solo parent household to the emotional weight of making all the decisions on your own to the uncertainty of who would care for your child if something happens to you, we’re covering what makes solo medical parenting a little different from a partnered parenting experience. (And why it’s unfortunately still relatable to some parents who technically have partners too.)A huge thank you to our sponsor for this summer season, Real Food Blends! Real Food Blends are the only 100% real food meals thatare ready-to-feed for people with feeding tubes. Offering 8 different meals and 1 snack for adults & kids, it's the closest thing to homemade blenderized tube feeding. Learn more at realfoodblends.com!Links:Fill out our contact form to join upcoming discussion groups!Join The Rare Life newsletter and never miss an update!Listen to Ep 156: Should I Get a Divorce?Follow us on Instagram @the_rare_life!Donate to the podcast or Contact me about sponsoring an episode. 
Jul 30
31 min
Why Asking for Help Feels So Hard (Summer Mini #7)
As parents taking care of disabled and medically complex kids, we could probably use a little more help and support than the average person... But that doesn’t make it easy to ask for it.From guilt to societal pressure to simply not having anyone you can trust for support, we’re digging into why help is just so hard to ask for. A huge thank you to our sponsor for this summer season, Real Food Blends! Real Food Blends are the only 100% real food meals thatare ready-to-feed for people with feeding tubes. Offering 8 different meals and 1 snack for adults & kids, it's the closest thing to homemade blenderized tube feeding. Learn more at realfoodblends.com!Links:Fillout our contact form to join upcoming discussion groups!Join The Rare Life newsletter and never miss an update!Follow us on Instagram @the_rare_life!Donate to the podcast or Contact me about sponsoring an episode. 
Jul 23
35 min
Sexual Health for Disabled Youth w/ Jill Arneson & Amanda Griffith-Atkins (Summer Mini #6)
As our disabled and medically complex children grow and mature, caring for and navigating their sexual health can be a tricky topic. From appropriately navigating sexual activity, consent, basic hygiene and even more complicated topics like birth control and how puberty can bring about new health complications, we’re breaking down a ton of different sexual health aspects in this episode.A huge thank you to our sponsor for this summer season, Real Food Blends! Real Food Blends are the only 100% real food meals thatare ready-to-feed for people with feeding tubes. Offering 8 different meals and1 snack for adults & kids, it's the closest thing to homemade blenderized tube feeding. Learn more at realfoodblends.com!Links:Fill out our contact form to join upcoming discussion groups!Join The Rare Life newsletter and never miss an update!Follow Amanda on Instagram @amanda.griffith.atkins!Follow Jill on Instagram @jill.arneson!Follow us on Instagram @the_rare_life!Donate to the podcast or Contact me about sponsoring an episode.
Jul 16
29 min
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