Download day 4 worksheet here.Transcript:I’d like to read you a short excerpt from one of my all time favourite books, The Power of Now by Eckhart Tolle. (Pg 15.)“When someone goes to the doctor and says, “I hear a voice in my head,” he or she will most likely be sent to a psychiatrist. The fact is that, in a very similar way, virtually everyone hears a voice, or several voices, in their head all the time: the involuntary thought processes that you don’t realise you have the power to stop. Continuous monologues or dialogues.You have probably come across “mad” people in the street incessantly talking or muttering to themselves. Well, that’s not much different from what you and all other “normal” people do, except that you don’t do it out loud. The voice comments, speculates, judges, compares, complains, likes, dislikes, and so on. The voice isn’t necessarily relevant to the situation you find yourself in at the time; it may be reviving the recent or distant past or rehearsing or imagining possible future situations. Here it often imagines things going wrong and negative outcomes; this is called worry. Sometimes this soundtrack is accompanied by visual images or “mental movies” Even if the voice is relevant to the situation at hand, it will interpret it in terms of the past. This is because the voice belongs to your conditioned mind, which is the result of all your past history as well as of the collective cultural mind-set you inherited. So you see and judge the present through the eyes of the past and get a totally distorted view of it. It is not uncommon for the voice to be a person’s own worst enemy. Many people live with a tormentor in their head that continuously attacks and punishes them and drains them of vital energy. It is the cause of untold misery and unhappiness, as well as of disease. The good news is that you can free yourself from your mind. This is the only true liberation. You can take the first step right now. Start listening to the voice in your head as often as you can. Pay particular attention to any repetitive thought patterns, those old gramophone records that have been playing in your head perhaps for many years. This is what I mean by “watching the thinker”, which is another way of saying: listen to the voice in your head, be there as the witnessing presence. When you listen to that voice, listen impartially. That is to say, do not judge. Do not judge or condemn what you hear, for doing so would mean that the same voice has come in again through the back door. You’ll soon realise: there is the voice, and here I am listening to it, watching it. This I am realisation, this sense of your own presence, is not a thought. It arises from beyond the mind. Now, here are some notes I made on this in July 2018 -  I told you this workshop has been in the making for a long time didn’t I ;) The voice in our mind that tells continual, non-stop stories is our condition mind. It takes what we have learned from the past, our past experiences, lessons, upsets, achievements - all our history, along with the collective cultural mindset we have inherited, to tell us stories - usually in order to protect us. Our mind does this because it has pieced together that this is how we survive. It’s found that from somewhere we have been rewarded for particular past actions, even if that’s a “well done” for losing all of that weight - “you look great!” That social acceptance is a huge reward for our ego. The issue is our present is clouded by judgement. This judgement is created through the eyes of our past so we get a totally distorted view of our present. For those struggling internally with thoughts and stories they tell themselves about their body and food, this realisation is huge. In order to take control of our mind we must pay attention and listen. Listen to what stories we play over and over again to ourselves.“I’m not enough"“I can’t eat chocolate, it’ll make me fat”“I have no self control”Take these thoughts and write them down. Flesh them out non-judgementally. If we judge these thoughts, we are identifying with them. We are once again becoming “the thinker”. Observe impartially, write the stories down and try to get to the bottom of why you tell yourself these horrible things. In order to take control, we often need to get to the bottom of why we tell ourselves something first. “My sense of self does not depend on the contents of my mind.” Society and the media projects an idealistic image of the human body. For women it’s often glowing clear skin, tiny waists, toned arms and legs, big eyes and perfect hair. For men it’s six packs, huge shoulders, a perfectly chiseled jaw and towering height. None of us can actually achieve this because 99.9% of the imagery has been digitally modified. Our brains are constantly being shown images of what a “human” looks like only for us to look in the mirror and not match up. Our minds are being bombarded with what we should look like, we’re not consciously thinking the images we’re receiving have been modified, we’re just noticing the differences. The average adult in the western world sees between 3000 and 5000 advertisements a day. Numbers vary depending on the study you look at, some claiming that it is up to 20,000 advertisements a day.Have a think about the different places you see adverts: tv, radio, on the side of a bus, billboards, online on facebook, instagram, twitter, your favourite blog, newspapers, magazines  - the list is endless. How often are you shown a digitally modified version of a person in those adverts? Anne Becker an expert on Eating disorders at Harvard Medical School in Boston decided to look into this. She chose to study females in Fiji. Why? Because up until the mid 1990s there was only one reported case of anorexia nervosa in the whole country. In 1995 the Government of Fiji allowed Western TV Shows to be broadcast on the television stations in fiji and even then remote parts of the country were only just starting to hear about TV. In 1998 Becker held a small survey which was later reported in the British Journal of Psychiatry in 2002. Just 3 years after Western media arrived in the country, one in every ten girls reported having vomited to lose weight.By 2007 Becker’s team had spent over a decade studying the impact of the media on females in Fiji. More than 500 girls ages 15 to 20 were surveyed, the results showed that at least four in every ten reported vomiting to manage their weight. This report also showed that the girls didn’t have to directly consume the media, they were being influenced by those in their social circle - family and friends, who had consumed western media. Up until 1995 Fijian culture valued large, strong women, it had a very positive message around women eating a lot. This study alone shows just how much the media can affect us.But it’s not just teenagers and adults that are affected. Our behaviours around food and body image can often be traced right back to our childhood. Have a think about the toys you played with as a young child. Barbies with perfect bodies, Polly Pockets with their cute little outfits and pretty hairstyles. Action Men with six packs...ever seen a Barbie or an action man with even the hint of soft, gentle, huggable skin on their tummy? I don’t think so. Even Pregnant Barbie was absolutely tiny with a magnetic perfect bump. According to a study held in 2002 by Cash and Pruzinsky, 90% of girls aged 3 to 11 own a Barbie doll. The Yale Center For Eating and Weight Disorders looked into how a young adult woman could achieve Barbie’s proportions - it was medically and physically impossible.According to the National Association of Anorexia Nervosa and Associated Disorders  81% of ten year olds are worried about getting fat. This isn’t solely down to the media though, it’s the subconscious messages children are receiving from those around them. How are the adults in their world acting around food? How do they speak about their bodies? What are their reactions to body image? Whether we like it or not, all of this impacts a child’s perception of the world. I’d like you to ask yourself: Does the number on your scales reflect the person you are inside? Does it show your kindness? Your intelligence? Your loyalty? Your love? Your passions? Your interests? Your strength?If you’re a shoe size 6, would you choose to push yourself into a shoe size 4? Would you aspire to one day be a shoe size 4?If you could take yourself back to your childhood, what age would you have been when you first became aware of your own body image?What would you say to little you now?What advice would you give?Body positivity isn’t about celebrating fat bodies, it isn’t about encouraging people to put on weight, it isn’t about promoting obesity. It’s about celebrating the body you have right now, celebrating yourself, your bloody wonderful body and all it can do right now. Not once you’ve lost that weight, not once your skin is clear, not once your thighs are slender. It’s about accepting and celebrating your amazing body just as it is, learning to like it and eventually love it. Have you read the book Body Positive Power by Megan Jayne Crabbe otherwise known as BodyPosiPanda? In my opinion it’s a must read for everyone and I wanted to share a few really important points that Megan makes in the book. “Fun Fact: Studies have shown that the more we enjoy our food, the more nutrients we absorb from it. In one study that Linda Bacon describes in Health at Every Size, two groups of women were served a traditional Thai meal, one group was from Thailand, the other Sweden. The Thai women liked the meal more, and absorbed 50 per cent more iron from the food than the Swedish women did. Which means forcing yourself to eat things you don’t like in the name of health isn’t as good for you as you think it is.” Forcing ourselves to eat foods we don’t enjoy often stems from a want to control our appearance - usually weight related. Many of us have thought a little too much about what life will be like once were “thin”. The amazing things that will happen, how people will look at us, treat us, fall in love with us. The clothes we’ll be able to wear. The jobs we’ll be able to do. The holidays we’ll finally be able to go on. The new friends we’ll have, the new way in which our family will love us. Megan puts it perfectly on page 122 - “It says a lot that in the ‘When I’m Thin’ fantasy we don’t just have a different body, we are a completely different person. We really believe that reducing the amount of flesh on our frames has the power to change every single thing about ourselves that we don’t like. Kudos, diet industry, genius marketing plan, but also, screw you.”Another truth bomb that Megan touches upon in the book is who funds particular research. When we read studies and research, when headlines scream statistics regarding body size, health and wellbeing at us, how often do we take a proper look into the study before accepting what the tabloids want us to believe? How often to we uncover who actually funded the study? I’d hazard a guess at hardly ever. “Obesity research is almost solely funded by the weight-loss industry. Conducting studies is expensive, and government funds don’t even begin to cover them all. Luckily, our good friend the diet industry is there to give millions to studies aiming to prove that fat is killing us, meaning that in turn their sales go through the rood as we all run, terrified, to ur nearest weight-loss group. Megan goes on to write “A perfect example of this lies in the holy grail of health myths: the BMI chart. Not too long ago the cut-off point for women not be in the ‘normal’ weight range was up to 27.3 on the BMI chart. These days, the cut-off point is 25, what happened?In 1997, the National Institutes of Health in the US brought together a task force of nine medical experts to decide whether the BMI categories should be lowered. Despite a lack of evidence those with weights in the upper end of the categories experienced more illness or decreased life expectancy, the experts went ahead and lowered the cut-off points anyway. The day before the ruling, 58 million Americans were considered overweight or obese by BMI standards, the day after the ruling that number jumped to 97 million. Which means that millions of people in the US had become medically fat overnight, without gaining a single pound.  So why were the cut-off points lowered? Two journalists from Newark-based The Star-Ledger shed some light on the question when they uncovered some serious conflicts of interest: ‘Eight of the nine members of the National Institutes of Health task force on the prevention and treatment of obesity have ties to the weight-loss industry, either as consultants to pharmaceutical companies, recipients of research money from them, or advisors to for-profit groups such as Weight Watchers.’ Just think how many people overnight were willing to hand over their bank card details to the weight loss companies. I’m not saying that we all need to put on weight and become medically obese, what I am saying is that it is no wonder society is so fatphobic. It’s no wonder we grow up never ever ever liking our bodies and constantly wanting to change it. We’re only human, we’ve only been going along with what our society has taught us. Society also has a lot to say about exercise and sculpting the perfect body. Megan writes “Laura Fraser wrote in Losing It that ‘the goal of exercise, for many women, isn’t to achieve good health, but a perfectly disciplined, slender body’. But why do our bodies need to be disciplined? You only discipline something when it’s wrong, when it’s broken the rules, when it needs to be taught a lesson. The fitspo image is providing us with one more way that we believe our bodies are wrong, they’ve broken the rules of what a fit body should look like and need to be taught, with punishing workout regimes, a lesson in how to conform. Haven’t we punished our bodies enough already?”  So, the way we feel about our body has a hell of a lot to do with how society and specific industries want us to feel about our body. But, what if we took back control? What if we looked into finding ways to love and appreciate our body instead and more importantly look at the strengths we have as a person - after all the way we look really is the least important thing about us. In your homework this evening I’ve included a list of possible strengths, have a quick look mark some of the strengths you possess. I’m great at making up stories and reading them aloud to children, laughing at jokes, looking after loved ones, cleaning, Christmas in general, cat cuddling, wrapping gifts, making an awesome cup of tea and using the unicorn emoji in professional settings where it could be received as rather an unprofessional touch but always gets a smile. The things that your noticing now, those strengths, make up a part of you and to those who love you, they matter so much more than the way you look.  So, do we just ignore the parts of our body we don’t like? Absolutely not! You know how when you have a worry and you keep it to yourself it’s like a balloon that just gets bigger and bigger until it pops? It turns into something absolutely huge, so out of control you have no idea how you’ll ever live a normal life again. Your mind spirals, it keeps you awake at night and then you share it with someone. Suddenly it’s like realising what you thought was a scary monster about to kill you in the dark is actually just a shadow. It’s importance diminishes. For me I used to hate my tummy - I hated the podgy roundness of it. In admitting this, saying those words out loud I realised how mean I was being, I would poke and prod my tummy in the mirror. Look for it immediately in photos, cover it up, suck it in, have the most awful thoughts about it. I knew something had to be done so I began to turn my language towards my tummy into something more positive. When I’d notice negative thoughts in my mind, I’d think “My tummy is cuddly and soft. It’s often used as a pillow by little munchkins. It holds food for me and cup upon cup of tea. It keeps me upright. It’s where I feel my instinct, that gut feeling comes from there - it guides me to do the right thing, to follow the right path.” These thoughts weren’t easy to conjure up at first, I wrote them down, I’d often journal about it, but gradually I began to notice they’d automatically pop into my mind because I was re-programming the thoughts corresponding to that part of my body. Do I ever have negative thoughts towards my tummy now, sometimes - pretty much only due to comparing myself to others and when this happens, I ask myself apart from their tummy, would I want the rest of their life? Would I want their family? Their job Their life circumstances? Would I want to be them? Or would I prefer to be me? Then I tune back into my good thoughts about my tummy. It takes time and patience, it’s about being mindful but it’s so very worth it. We’re going to try something and I need you to be really brave and really really courageous for this next exercise. Note down just one thing you dislike about your appearance and why you dislike it. Feel the weight and pressure life off your shoulders. Now I’d like you to think of your own positive phrase or things you can say about that part of your body. Scribble this down somewhere and remind yourself of it. For now, just focus on retraining your brain to appreciate and feel gratitude towards this one part of your body, don’t overwhelm yourself. It’s take a lifetime of negative thoughts to get to this point, it’s going to take a little while to feel love for your whole body, most of the time. Let’s recap what we’ve covered today:What influences body imageThe effects the media has on our own body imageBody positivityWhy society wants you to hate your bodyOur personal strengths which are non-appearance relatedTurning something we hate about ourselves into something we can learn to appreciate

Download Day 3 worksheet here.Transcript:Self care, 2019 seemed to bring a lot of talk around self care but much of it was at a very surface based level - mainly candles and baths. Now, if that’s what truly recharges you and makes you feel like your true, contented self, then that’s great, but there’s so much more which falls into “self care” which gets over looked and buried away. As women, we often find ourselves pushing our self care down the list of priorities, spending our days fulfilling other’s needs and wants. I know I keep saying it over and over again, but in order to give to others we need to fill our cup first. Absolutely Necessary Self CareWithin this category fall things we will often put off due to time and financial constraints which are actually really, truly necessary. Have ever gone without any of the following because you just don’t have the money, time or flexibility right now? Dentist appointmentHaircutMedical appointmentSmear testOpticians appointmentNew shoes/slippersWarm clothing during winterMedicine when sickFood which isn’t just toast or pastaTime off when poorlyAn early nightMore sleepRemoving the word should Saying no to social engagementPutting yourself firstSitting in the sunshineGiving yourself enough time to get to work, back home or get ready in the morning  Can you think of any others? This is self neglect. When we choose to go without any, really truly necessary things, we’re telling ourselves that we don’t deserve even the basics to live.    I remember two years ago something pretty small happened, which caught my attention and really, truly began my journey into what I call proper self care.  My slippers had holes in, they were literally falling apart, with no comfy sole. My feet hurt when wearing them because of how worn out they were. I refused to buy myself a new pair, even though our home has tiled floors and the alternative was walking around barefoot. I threw them away one weekend, deciding barefoot with socks was better than the slippers, which it probably was but it still left my feet feeling freezing cold. This was in the middle of winter and to add a little extra oomph to this story, my joints seize up when I’m cold due to having a chronic illness called EDS. Not long after I’d thrown the slippers away and not buying a new pair, driving home, I was listening to Emma Gannon's latest podcast with Jayne Hardy on self care. Jayne mentioned that she realised she had a problem with how she treated herself when she wouldn't buy herself a pair of slippers preferring to make do with slippers that had ripped soles and holes in them. She said she would never let a friend or family member wear slippers like that and go out and buy them a pair instantly, yet she didn't think she deserved any herself. I was driving back from the airport, and this wave of guilt swept over me. Guilt for not treating myself with even an ounce of kindness that I would a friend. If I saw a friend had no slippers I'd buy them a pair that very day. The slippers are just one tiny example of how we can neglect our needs, imagine these little things adding up, each with the message that we don’t deserve even the basics such as a full tummy, being warm and feeling well. Next we have the I Feel Loved & Cared For self care category. In this category we’ve got lovely things which make us feel fuzzy and warm. Little treats and relaxing activities. What kind of things do you treat yourself to in this category?Netflix nightFace maskPainted nailsA long luxurious bathQuiet time snuggled up on the sofa with a furry friend and a bookLighting candlesSpending time with a loved oneTaking a longer route to work or going for a nice walkSpending time on a hobby or exploring a new oneMoving your body such as going for a run or doing yogaFinally we have the Treating Yourself Self Care. This is for the bigger stuff, the things you’d treat a loved one to that you’d really love too. Because guess what, you are totally and utterly worth it. By treating yourself to the big stuff, when you can, you’re sending a message of self love deep within. Always remember, whenever you put yourself first, give to yourself and treat yourself, you’re filling your cup up. With a full cup you’re able to give to others, but from an empty cup you can give to no-one. What kind of things would you add to this list and have you ever done any of these for yourself with no other agenda other than to treat yourself? That handbag, pair of shoes, make up, or dress you’ve wanted for absolutely agesA course you want to invest your time/money in to become a sparklier version of yourselfA spa dayTaking yourself out for dinner, lunch or even just a cuppaA cinema trip for yourselfA membership to something which is totally frivolous but wonderfulTime spent on a guilty pleasureActs of self care are more important than we can ever begin to imagine. They reinforce within us that we are worth time, money and effort, in doing so it’ll reinforce that we deserve this from others to - supporting us through friendships, relationships and romantic relationships. Self care adds a little sparkle to our character which can often fizzle out, it makes us a little bouncier, peppier, more productive, energetic and generous. This can only be a good thing. Hobbies are also acts of self care as long as they bring us joy, if you hobbies don’t bring you joy, it’s time to ditch them and find something that does. Exploring hobbies is a toughie, it can often mean putting yourself out there and failing, remember nobody ever ever ever starts off being brilliant at anything, it takes time and practice and of course patience. What hobbies do you enjoy doing? Are there any things which you may label as “exercise” which I label as “joyful movement” which really perks you up and energises you? For me it’s things like rowing - I’m absolutely terrible but I find it very meditative and, because I’m still pretty new to rowing I have to really focus on what I’m doing, making sure I row at exactly the same time as the rest of the crew. I also enjoy swimming and yoga, because those forms of movement make me feel amazing. What about the gym? I can’t stand treadmills or rowing machines, I prefer to be out in the fresh air but many people really enjoy popping their headphones on and tuning into a podcast or music whilst they workout at the gym.  What about non-movement related hobbies? Which do you currently enjoy? I’ve recently taken up water colour painting which make me feel calm and grounded. I’ve always enjoyed pottering in the garden and cooking too - both of these bring me a quiet contentment and also a re-set of my body and mind like nothing else. In the worksheet you received today take some time after this live to fill it in if you haven’t already, finding activities which bring you joy are a very important part of being kind to yourself. Let’s recap on what we have soul dived into today:Absolutely Necessary Self CareI Feel Loved & Cared ForTreating Yourself Self CareJoyful Movement and Joyful HobbiesNow, I’d like you to make a promise to yourself to do one thing for yourself related to what we have spoken about today. Think of one small or big thing that you can do this week which adds to your self care. What’s it going to be? 

Download Day 2 worksheet hereTranscript: I know intuitive eating can sound a little airy fairy or even daunting - trusting your body to tell you when it’s full or what it feels like eating? Bit risky ;) Yet we happily put our trust in the hands of the latest diet craze or celeb pushing that craze. Everyone’s body, metabolism and digestive system is slightly different.  A diet which works for one person isn’t necessarily going to have the same effects on another person - in fact there are various studies to show that this has even been proven in identical twins. Intuitive eating is about tuning into what you feel like eating and paying attention to fullness levels - this isn’t always possible but you’ll feel much more satisfied with food and eating if you can make it happen more often. In order to get to the root of our own eating habits, stories and beliefs we have to rewind the clock. Take a moment to think about what food rules were present in your childhood. No eating before dinner? No chocolate or sweets on weekdays? An empty plate meant you could leave the dinner table? No snacks before dinner? What food rules can you remember from your childhood? Rules of restriction can often trigger behaviours and habits which stick - for example maybe the no snacks before dinner led you to secretly eat a chocolate bar or biscuits in your bedroom as a child or teenager due to being hungry, causing feelings of anxiety and guilt. This then continued on through adulthood, the feeling of guilt quietly bubbling away as you quickly shove a biscuit in your mouth, hoping no-one sees. There’s nothing wrong with eating a biscuit, no one is going to tell you off, yet the anxiety and guilt remains. What behaviours did those rules lead to? Jot them down in your notebook. When we can pin point where the behaviour or belief comes from and explain it to ourselves, the grip it has on us often loosens. It doesn’t seem quite so important anymore.  I’d like to take this moment to remind you that parents usually always have their children’s best interests at heart. They are not to blame for the hurdles we have to overcome when it comes to eating and body acceptance. These are personal issues which have come about via a variety of factors, not just childhood food rules. Parents were doing the very best with the information they had to hand. Nobody is to blame, but we are personally responsible for working on this and absolutely flying over those hurdles with sparkly fairy wings to boot! Something that I often hear is “I just eat and eat and eat until I feel sick” pop your fave emoji below if you can relate to this at times. As children we’re often told “eat just a spoonful more” or “just finish those veggies there”, “no you can’t have another sandwich!” They are all very well meaning suggestions from people who love us and want to take care of us but unfortunately, if followed, these suggestions lead us to override our hunger signals as children and we lose the ability to recognise what feeling full or hungry is like.  Physical hunger is a pretty simple one to recognise once you become aware; it gradually gets stronger, it’s something that comes on slowly that we notice little by little. If all of a sudden, we’re hungry out of the blue, this is likely to be emotional hunger. Emotional hunger is that instant hit of cakey pangs, or choccy pangs or maccy D pangs. Next time you feel that instant hit of hunger as yourself how you’re feeling - stressed? Happy? Upset? Angry?  I often nibble on things when I’m excited. THERE IS NOTHING WRONG WITH EMOTIONAL EATING - at times it can be the only soothing comforting thing we have. Please don’t deprive yourself of that if there is nothing else which will comfort you. You aren’t failing at life if you comfort eat. However, at times there are other remedies that will offer greater comfort than that instant, but short lasting, soother food offers. What things offer you comfort when you feel upset, angry, tired, stressed etc? You may have some of these on your list: chatting to a friend on the phone, a hug, a cat cuddle, swimming, walking in nature, losing yourself in Netflix, reading. Jot down the ones you’ve come up with to stick to your fridge as a reminder for the next time you go and open that door hoping the taste of something in there will make you feel better. Dive into the why. Why have you recently comfort eaten, what caused it? Why you chose food over another remedy and what needs you haven’t been meeting in life lately is something I often go further into with clients when working on intuitive eating, why not take time to journal through some of these things later?So, when it comes to physical hunger we need to ask ourselves if we’re eating enough or too much. I love the analogy I use in my journaling ebook Nourishing Soulfully - Gentle Journaling prompts To Uncover Your Personal Answers. Your driving along in your car on a long journey, you notice you have half a tang of petrol left, as you continue to drive along, the pin on the petrol gage slowly lowers, easing its way to the red ‘empty’ marker. You’re on the motorway, you can stop at regular points to refuel the car. You regularly notice the pin sliding towards the empty red bar. The car regularly BINGS to tell you that you need to refuel. Would you continue on without re-fueling? No? So why do that to your body? We need to eat regularly to top that gage up and for each of us that will look slightly difference when it comes to quantity, meals, snacks and portions. You may find that 6 meals a day works better for you than the traditional 3 meals and a snack or two. You may find snacking all day long keeps your energy levels topped up. You may find that it changes throughout the month or seasons. Take note of your hunger levels before your usual meals each day, you want to sit around a 4 or 5 just before a meal - 0 being starving and 10 being that awful feeling after eating thirds of Christmas dinner. After eating, ideally you want to comfortably sit around an 8. Do you think you’re eating enough? Are you aware of fullness levels before you get too full? Things that can help with noticing fullness levels:Placing your fork down after each mouthful, waiting to fully finish what your chewing before picking the fork up againEating slowly and pausing a few times during the meal, to down cutlery and check in with how full you areIf you’d like a dessert but think it may fill you up too much, check in with your fullness levels throughout your main - once you get to a 6 or 7 stop and leave room for dessert.Let’s move onto finding the foods that make you feel good. The food evaluation I included in today’s workbook is a simplified version of one I use with clients which you can do on your own, this will help you to brainstorm foods you like, don’t like, and foods you would like to try. With the list you end up creating, use the ideas to create a meal and snack list that really excites you and makes you smile. For meal and snack inspiration head to Instagram and Pinterest and search for different meal ideas. On Pinterest use keywords such as “comfort winter dinner ideas” and on Instagram search via hashtag like #lunchatwork If you’re someone who enjoys planning out meals and snacks, you can have a really great week planned ahead of you and then something doesn’t quite go to plan and you end up not being able to eat what you had originally set out to eat on Wednesday evening. This has the potential to send us into a bit of a spiral. When this happens imagine the following scenario in your head, which I always find really useful: You’re driving a long a road and come to a road block, so you follow the directed detour. You arrive at your destination at pretty much the same time, you just took an alternative route. Do you feel bad? Does it play on your mind all day? When it comes to food planning, your destination is eating something which satisfies you and fulfils you. Did your meal do that? Does it matter if you took an alternative route to that destination of eating something which satisfies your needs? I know that it all sounds lovely, eating what you want, when you want and often life can totally not provide us with the fair weather circumstances to do this, but there are ways to work around this. As someone who spends 10 hours a day at her day job, enjoys moving her body most days, works as a kindness coach the rest of the time, I know that a busy life and a healthy relationship with food is possible. Here are some tips of how I get into my food flow each week: What we feel like eating can often be influenced by the weather, when it’s hot and sunny we’ll crave lighter, fresher meals and snacks. When it’s cold and wet, we’ll often crave more comforting, filling foods. At the weekend I make a list of foods I’ve really fancied throughout the week and what I feel like I’ll enjoy eating the coming week. I delve into recipe books, Instagram and Pinterest for inspiration too. From this list I head to the supermarket to stock up on ingredients and I spend a morning each weekend batch cooking meals and preparing snacks for the week ahead:This usually looks like a few main meals, such as a soup, curry, pasta dish or rice dish A few things I can pop on to add a little excitement: chutneys, salad, nuts or seeds Snacks: hummus, energy balls, cake and fruit, oh and chocolate of course.  I pack my lunch and 3 snacks for work each day. As I’ve just eaten my breakfast and I’m full I’ll often think “oh I don’t need those snacks today” which is a big mistake. We can often mistake what we fancy eating throughout the day with our current fullness levels. Always take more than needed. I don’t always eat all of the snacks in my bag, but it’s nice to have something there when I’m peckish at work. It inevitably stops me ending the day absolutely starving and stopping off at the shop on the way home just to grab something, ANYTHING to eat because I’ve let my hunger go too far. We reach a point with hunger, where if we’re too hungry, all rationale and tuning into what we feel like eating goes out of the window. We just need food, any food and our survival instincts kick in, meaning we’ll be searching for foods which will give us an instant hit of sweetness, energy and fulness. When I eat at work, whilst I often eat in a hurry, I try to slow down and check in with fullness levels. If I’m still hungry I’ll have a snack after my lunch. If, before eating lunch I’m not that hungry at all, I’ll have one or two of my snacks instead of lunch and save that for later. You will be able to tune into hunger levels and intuitive eating with time, it takes practice, kindness and patience on your part and honing the skill. I often find that clients feel like they just don’t have the time but start small, try checking in with yourself around food just on a weekend day or a slower day for you and work from there. Let’s recap on what we have soul dived into in this session:Childhood food rules and eating behaviours Hunger signals - noticing fullness levels and checking inFinding the foods that make us feel goodWhen food plans don’t go to planHow a busy life and a healthy relationship with food is possible.

Click to download Day 1 worksheet.Transcript: Believing in others is something inherently engraved within us, it’s automatic, it’s subconscious, for whilst we know people mess up at times and make mistakes, we aren’t truly aware of how often that is. Yet we’ve been making mistakes our whole life, we know we get it wrong sometimes, this is how we learn, this is how everyone learns. Everyone makes mistakes. But we are much more aware of our own mistakes, big or small, they slowly chip away at our self belief, effecting our own confidence. We compare ourselves to others, not believing for a second they mess up as often as we do - I’ll let you in on a secret, we all make mistakes, we all make the same mistakes, our egos take a hit, we struggle and slowly build ourselves and the belief we have lost in ourselves, back up. Have you ever listened to the podcast How To Fail with Elizabeth Day? It’s a deep dive into failure, vulnerability and ultimately that everyone has failed spectacularly in their time. Through recognising these failures, Elizabeth’s guests are able to look back in hindsight and recognise their bravery, spirit for life, resilience and self belief and confidence they have courageously grown by getting up, brushing themselves off and continuing on. Failures on the podcast include: Failures at schoolFailing to pass life altering exams such as the bar examFailing at parenthoodFailures in fixing othersFailures in loveAlcohol problemsFailures in careers and the list goes on and on.Take a moment to think about a failure in your life, one will probably quickly pop into your head. How does that failure make you feel right now? Looking back, quickly jot down what caused that failure?Now consider what you did to pull yourself out of that failure? How did you react? How did you carry on? Jot down the steps you took, whether that was with support or alone, to return to some sort of “normality”.  What characteristics of your personality and qualities helped you to overcome that failure? Those things form part of the amazing human you are. Once we have finished today’s video, or in the coming days - whenever you have time, I’d like you to do this with 3 more “failures” using the worksheet you have received today. Once you have finished, jot down the qualities you have noticed within in yourself. In order to grow our own belief and confidence we have to find evidence, we have to prove to ourselves that we are worthy, that we are able to overcome adversity just accepting it because other’s think it doesn’t cut it - as you know. I don’t know if your school did this, but I remember at Primary School on our last day of being in Year 6, before we took the huge leap from being big fish in small ponds to tiny fish in the big scary sea in secondary school, we had a special assembly. An assembly which celebrated our individual achievements and accomplishments. Most of us here are goal post movers, which means we rarely take time to recognise achieving our goals before moving the goal posts of the goal or getting onto the next thing we’d like to do. Have a think about your achievements and accomplishments as an adult, big or small, from getting that job you so desperately wanted to managing to wash your hair at the end of a bloody awful day. Maybe you gave yourself some extra time one weekend for you, to rest and recharge. Maybe you make the best spag Bol in the street. Maybe you care for a family member or make someone smile every day. Take a moment to jot down those achievements you’ve come up with. Your homework is to pop this in a place where you can read it once, twice or three times a day to remind yourself of all that you are. Overnight successes - we live in a world where headlines declare overnight successes left, right and centre. We believe that from one day to the next someone can go from being a lowly, everyday person to someone absolutely incredible, in comparing ourselves to them we feel inadequate, our self belief waning. Yet, overnight successes don’t really exist. Think about something you are working on or towards at the moment, something that your own self belief and confidence is holding you back from giving into it completely.  What is it? What could happen if you gave caution to the wind and just went for it? Now this is a biggie, a huge one if you will, we’re going to go deep. So take a deep breath in. What would your life look like if you could have anything, be anything and do anything? What is stopping you from achieving that? I believe you can do it. Why do you believe YOU specifically can’t do it when others can? How can you believe in yourself more? Take a moment to write down your responses. Finally, I’d like you to contact 2 to 3 friends and ask them to honestly describe you in 5 words. I know how scary that is - I’ve done it! I hovered over sending the messages, unsure if I could do it. That self doubt kicked in. What if they couldn’t think of even one word? What if they don’t think I have any good things about me? Oh gosh, I don’t even want to know! It’s time for you to see how others see you, because you are an absolutely awesome human being.  Let’s recap on what we have soul dived into this evening:Our failures, how we have overcome them and recognising the qualities within us that have helped us to do soOur life achievements and accomplishments - big and small creating a list to look at as often as we canHow overnight successes do not exist and entertaining the idea of not allowing a lack of self belief to hold us back from what we’re working towards right nowThe Big one - What our life would look like if we could have anything, be anything and do anything. HOMEWORK: Contacting 2 to 3 soul friends and asking them to describe you in 5 words.