I was inspired by the phenomena of everyone having a brand and people  becoming 'branded' and by my classmate's thesis on this topic! I hope  this was insightful. Feel free to share your thoughts too! I tried so hard to not do jump cuts, but because I don't script my  videos I have a lot of dead air that I cut out heh. I'll work on that lol. Regardless hope this enlightens you to some capacity. :D

Thanks for watching/listening. :) Just wanted to chat about the feeling of ever being enough and feeling beautiful, as well as the beauty industry. I hope this was helpful or insightful! Genuinely would love guests one day if anyone does wanna chat about other beauty standards, comment and lmk! if you enjoy my content, consider supporting me with a ko-fi as i save for my 1st home. :) https://ko-fi.com/everjanine​ - P.S. Sorry about that one loud word lol. ✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* ☾ ☼ ☽  *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧   🕓 TIMESTAMPS 🕓 0:00​ intro 2:30​ beauty standards 5:00​ why i want to talk about this 6:10​ the beauty industry 13:50​ aiming for perfection vs your best self 15:18​ are we enough? ✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* ☾ ☼ ☽  *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧   Dove Commercials I referenced: Onslaught: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9zKfF...​ Evolution: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KN2yu...​

As I learned how toxic streaming is for me, I realized that social media, particularly Twitter and Instagram are too. In our 2nd episode, I  talk about my experiences, negative patterns, and the positives of what  being off these platforms have done for me. I question deeply the  motives of content-creators, the subconscious effects of Instagram's  expectation of perfection, and how Twitter feeds into an era of  loneliness and over information. There's a lot that can be said  for each platform, and in general I realized some of them really take  away from my happiness. Hope this is insightful! Happy-ish new year. :D Main Timestamps: 0:00 intro 2:30 what i learned in 2020 4:16 social media doesn't make me happy (the actual talk lmao) 9:00 delving into twitter 15:49 manipulation and the effect of numbers / statistics 22:02 is social media essential for success and happiness? 23:20 delving into instagram (stories, filters, and perfect feeds) 31:30 marketing tricks vs our intentions 38:14 summary & final thoughts

In my first podcast, I end 2020 with a brutally honest reflection over the past 4 years being a twitch affiliate and streamer. I talk about what I've learned, my regrets, advice, and delve into common streaming topics such as streamer twitter, toxic viewers, etc. Streaming not only amplified my anxiety disorder, but it also fed toxic patterns of comparison, lack of self-care, and obsession. I am so done with streaming, time to focus on myself. Happy new year! TIMESTAMPS 00:00:00 Podcast Intro 00:02:21 My Streaming Journey / History 00:04:31 How I Got Into Mental Health Content 00:06:04 finding my niche & using twitch strike 00:04:31 why streaming was toxic for me 00:07:15 being a Smaller Streamer (less than 15 avg viewers) 00:07:40 being raided with 10k+ by lilchiipmunk (first giant raid) 00:09:10 streaming was a 'waste' of my time 00:09:24 my mistake was NOT diversifying from Twitch, I even tried Mixer 00:10:20 being an attractive girl on Twitch / showing boobs / Twitch 'thots' 00:12:35 Twitch TOS is a joke... + favoritism 00:13:41 streamer twitter & my regrets 00:17:50 hyper focus on followers / numbers & hypocrisy 00:18:32 streaming as a hobby vs for growth, "being the next pokimane" 00:19:21 streaming = marketing & I fucking hate it :) 00:20:27 streaming is manipulative (the parasocial problem of streaming) 00:23:20 boundaries and vulnerability  00:24:20 codependency among viewers & streamers 00:25:55 toxic viewers and Twitch trolls, large streamers 00:26:53 why it felt harder as a smaller streamer  00:27:57 being obese & in the spotlight  00:28:54 codependency with viewers dumping emotions 00:29:49 streaming is community management + minecraft & jackbox nightmares  00:30:37 streaming is like masochism LUL 00:31:56 how i quit, it was REALLY hard... 00:36:26 toxic patterns, comparison, & validation 00:37:15 streaming felt like a popularity contest 00:38:28 dealing with guilt of disappointment for ourselves / community 00:39:55 follow for follow (f4f) communities Twitch Kittens, Team Emmmsie, etc & "networking" 00:40:24 streaming made it hard to have fun offline... 00:42:23 best memories in streaming 00:44:06 worst moments in streaming 00:44:41 my regrets from streaming 00:45:32 advice i'd give to others 00:45:56 should you quit? 00:44:41 advice i'd give to others