“I just don’t want to be miserable anymore” sounds reasonable after divorce, but it can also trap you in a life where you never really stretch yourself or create something really incredible after divorce. So in this episode I'm talking about audacity: the decision to want more, believe more, and build more, even when you don’t have proof yet and even when a small scared part of your brain says it’s safer to stay realistic. We dig into why so many divorcing and divorced women shrink their dre...
Jul 20
20 min
If you’ve ever caught yourself checking someone’s face, tone, or mood to decide whether you’re “okay,” you’re not overreacting and you’re not broken. In this episode I talk about the pattern behind that reflex and why it feels so intense during divorce and divorce recovery: emotional outsourcing, or the habit of sourcing safety, belonging, and self-worth from outside yourself instead of from within. I'll unpack how emotional outsourcing can masquerade as people pleasing, perfectionism, and c...
Jul 13
21 min
Your body isn’t “being dramatic” after divorce, it’s doing its best to protect you. When your nervous system gets stuck in fight-or-flight or shutdown, you can feel tense, numb, hyper-alert, or exhausted. I'll walk you through a simple somatic practice that helps you feel safe in your body again without overthinking your way out of stress. I teach pendulation, a nervous system regulation tool from Peter Levine’s Somatic Experiencing work. The idea is really simple: notice a place of discomfo...
Jul 6
9 min
Perfectionist fantasies of what tomorrow will bring during divorce can feel useful - like we're moving toward something. Your brain whispers, “Once the decree is signed, once the schedule is set, once the kids adjust, once I heal, then I’ll finally feel calm.” But what if that promise is the very thing keeping you stuck? In this episode I dig into two sneaky patterns that show up during and after divorce: perfectionist fantasies and tomorrow thinking. Perfectionism doesn’t always look like s...
Jun 29
24 min
There's a moment after divorce when you realize at some point, someone new might see you naked can hit like a wave after divorce. If your first thought is I need to change my body before I’m allowed to date, be touched, or feel confident in myself, you’re not alone and you’re not broken. We’re getting honest about where that fear really comes from, and why it isn’t proof that your body is wrong. I take a look at how body image after divorce is shaped by messages you absorbed long before you ...
Jun 22
25 min
Your brain can turn divorce into a courtroom where every thought sounds like evidence and every feeling becomes a verdict. We’re slowing that whole process down and letting you know what’s really going on: cognitive distortions, or in other words, “brain lies” that spike divorce. I break down four patterns that show up for so many divorcing and divorced women: all or nothing thinking (I’m either winning or failing), mind reading (everyone definitely hates me), catastrophizing (one hard...
Jun 15
21 min
That moment when you finally get quiet and realize you don’t know what you want anymore can feel terrifying and weirdly ordinary at the same time. Today I’m going to shine a light on what’s happening for so many women in unhappy marriages and in the aftermath of divorce: identity loss through self-abandonment, the slow, almost invisible disappearing act that can look like love while it quietly erases you. I'll talk about how this pattern builds over years through tiny decisions like deferrin...
Jun 8
21 min
Comparison after divorce can feel like a punch to the gut. One run-in with your ex, one hard kid drop-off, or one “perfect life” scroll on Instagram and suddenly your mind is building a case that you’re behind, broken, or failing. I’m Karin Nelson, a divorce coach, and I want to slow that moment down with you and show you what’s actually happening so you can stop treating the comparison as proof that there's something wrong with you. We start by naming the comparison trap and why it’s so com...
Jun 1
25 min
Divorce can turn even simple choices into second-guessing spirals. If you’ve been asking yourself, “Why can’t I trust my own judgment anymore?”, we’re going straight to the root: self-trust is the foundation for everything you do in your life moving forward after divorce; under every boundary, every parenting decision, every next step. When that foundation feels shaky, everything else feels wobbly too, no matter how good your lawyer is or how many spreadsheets you make. I dive into the histo...
May 25
28 min
Your mind may be ready to “move on” after divorce, but your body might still be living in survival mode. When divorce shakes your sense of stability, even ordinary moments can trigger a surge of stress that feels bigger than the situation. In this episode I’ll want to give you a reset you can use immediately, wherever you find yourself. I walk through a fast grounding technique designed to help your nervous system feel safe again. With this grounding technique you’re giving your brain and bo...
May 18
9 min
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