
Ladies, Theydies, and Gentlethems! Behold Trixie's newly-acquired ring of destiny: the one and only Oura Ring! A small and gleaming metallic circlet wherein the chronicles of the mortal frame are gathered and organized for those fine souls engaged in the pursuit of optimal living. Existing in the nether regions between sleep and waking, heart and breath, exertion and recovery, stress and readiness, the ring brings forth the unseen tides of the human body and lets them shine like constellations upon a midnight sky. At each new dawn this tiny oracle speaks anew; revealing when strength should be summoned, when weariness must be honored, and how the long rivers of rest, movement, and strain may guide its bearer toward greater wisdom over the mysterious organic realm within. And to place this sparkling halo into another’s hand in the act of gift-giving is to grant yet one more enchantment: a recurring subscription whose revelations, like the turning of the seasons and the inexorable hand of fate upon one’s credit card, return faithfully again and again each and every month.
Aug 25
1 hr

From a nameless wind-swept Midwest town came Merrily, an innocent creature bound for Hollywood beneath a horrible perm, her face entombed in pancake makeup thick enough to withstand the California sun. Into Bob Barker’s glittering Price is Right kingdom she strode. The lights blinded her as she sauntered past rows of mustachioed men in enormous collars and women tucked into high-waisted brown slacks that seemed engineered to repel both fashion and human affection. The gods of Plinko and Pontiac had written her name upon the heavens, for as she bid upon refrigerators, dinette sets, and speedboats, she was clearly destined to become a gameshow legend. Finally, Merrily reached the Showcase Showdown, her perm blazing like a thunderhead, and with one sacred spin seized victory from the grasp of fate, returning to the cornfields forever crowned in avocado appliances and the terrible majesty of retail price.
Aug 18
48 min

Art, to us beautiful biological women, is the residue produced when consciousness attempts to impose intelligibility upon the otherwise rudimentary foundation of existence. It's a beautiful and occasionally difficult transformation through which sensation, memory, and desire are alchemized into a new state of being that endeavors to comprehend reality. Art occupies that mythical space between revelation and perception, where the observer engages in an effort to fully grasp their brain's interpretive architecture, even when it's painfully obvious that journey is a fool's errand. In summation, art is perhaps best understood not as beauty, expression, or even meaning, but as an endless negotiation between the ineffable and the intelligible. Also, sometimes a big table is just a big table.
Aug 11
48 min

Hey there, homemakers: why serve your hungry brood another dreary, bare-faced supper when the smart modern cook can tuck beef, chicken, ham, veggie dogs, Cyclospora-laden lettuce, and even yesterday’s leftovers into a snug little blanket of golden, buttery, feather-flaky pastry? With one gay whirl of the rolling pin, you can turn an ordinary Tuesday meal into an Atomic Age taste sensation that makes Junior clean his plate, Sis sit up straight, and your hard-working hubby forget the traffic, the boss, and that third highball with his mistress at Grand Central Station. So wrap it, crimp it, pop it into the oven, and serve your family a piping-hot parcel of domestic triumph, because nothing says “Welcome home, dear!” like concealing an entire dinner inside several hundred calories of shortening.
Aug 4
56 min

We here at Bald, LLC are proud to present: "The Essence of Consequence," our ultra-natural deodorant lovingly compounded from Icelandic aloe, pulverized cedar bark, ceremonial Scottish peat, and the pollen from downtown Los Angeles sidewalk dandelions. We take this proprietary blend and strain it through a used pair of nylons from our 2022 live tour, and we do it all without a single vulgar ingredient proven to work in any way whatsoever, as ethics can't scientifically prevent perspiration or odor. Each artisanal swipe transforms your underarm into a thriving, biodiverse wetland, allowing you to greet the day with the moral serenity of someone who has personally defeated chemistry and the sinister concept of “smelling fresh." Because let's face it: feeling good about what you wear is important, even when wearing it is an olfactory assault to all those within twenty feet of you.
Ready to upgrade your home for way less? To shop all things home and get your space ready for less, head to: https://Wayfair.com
To get simple, online access to personalized, affordable care for ED, Hair Loss, and more, visit: https://Hims.com/BALD
Find the functional gummy that matches exactly what mood you're looking for! Use promo code BALD when you check out to save 20% on your first order at: https://mood.com
Follow Trixie: @TrixieMattel
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To check out our official YouTube Clips Channel: https://bit.ly/TrixieAndKatyaClipYT
Don’t forget to follow the podcast for free wherever you're listening or by using this link: https://bit.ly/thebaldandthebeautifulpodcast
If you want to support the show, and get all the episodes ad-free go to: https://thebaldandthebeautiful.supercast.com
To check out future Live Podcast Shows, go to: https://trixieandkatya.com/#tour
To check out the Trixie Motel in Palm Springs, CA: https://www.trixiemotel.com
Listen and Watch Anywhere!
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#TrixieMattel #KatyaZamo #BaldBeautiful
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Jul 28
58 min

Across the porcelain provinces of our human experience, each soul leaves behind its own small testament; some solemn and substantial, with others fleeting as a whispered flush under the gentle glow from a nightlight. There are movements of grandeur, movements of haste, movements that arrive with operatic thunder. And then there are those shy little passages that scarcely trouble the waters below. The majesty of these movements is that all belong to the same mysterious intestinal symphony called life. Let us therefore abandon judgment at the bathroom door, accepting that no two constitutions are alike and that dignity may be found even in our most private acts of gastrointestinal release. For when we honor the full spectrum of what moves through us, we cease straining against one another and enter, at last, a gentler world of movement harmony.
Need a website or domain? To save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain, head to: https://Squarespace.com/BALD
This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Start online therapy today! Sign up and get 10% off at: https://BetterHelp.com/BALD
Follow Trixie: @TrixieMattel
Follow Katya: @Katya_Zamo
To check out our Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/cw/trixieandkatya
To watch the podcast on YouTube: http://bit.ly/TrixieKatyaYT
To check out our official YouTube Clips Channel: https://bit.ly/TrixieAndKatyaClipYT
Don’t forget to follow the podcast for free wherever you're listening or by using this link: https://bit.ly/thebaldandthebeautifulpodcast
If you want to support the show, and get all the episodes ad-free go to: https://thebaldandthebeautiful.supercast.com
To check out future Live Podcast Shows, go to: https://trixieandkatya.com/#tour
To check out the Trixie Motel in Palm Springs, CA: https://www.trixiemotel.com
Listen and Watch Anywhere!
http://bit.ly/thebaldandthebeautifulpodcast
Follow Trixie:
Official Website: https://www.trixiemattel.com
TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@trixie
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Twitter (X): https://twitter.com/trixiemattel
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#TrixieMattel #KatyaZamo #BaldBeautiful
Jul 21
1 hr 1 min

The City of Los Angeles, in the full radiance of its civic wisdom and an ambition matched only by its bewildering infrastructure, proudly announces the inauguration of a new subway line connecting the private residence of Trixie Mattel to a long-abandoned shopping mall near MacArthur Park. Conceived without regard for ridership, urban necessity, fiscal prudence, or the travel needs of any other living person, this gleaming subterranean artery shall deliver Ms. Mattel from her front door to the silent food court with unprecedented speed, dignity, and municipal extravagance. Though this monumental achievement will benefit no commuter, neighborhood, business, or public institution whatsoever, Los Angeles takes immense pride in having finally created a transit system that works perfectly for one skinny legend.
To see if you qualify for GLP-1 medications using Ro's free insurance checker, go to: https://Ro.co/BALD
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Don’t let stigma stand in the way of support. Start therapy with BetterHelp! Sign up and get 10% off at: https://BetterHelp.com/BALD
Try Mood's incredible line of cannabis gummies! Save 20% off your first order with promo code BALD at: https://Mood.com
Follow Trixie: @TrixieMattel
Follow Katya: @Katya_Zamo
To check out our Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/cw/trixieandkatya
To watch the podcast on YouTube: http://bit.ly/TrixieKatyaYT
To check out our official YouTube Clips Channel: https://bit.ly/TrixieAndKatyaClipYT
Don’t forget to follow the podcast for free wherever you're listening or by using this link: https://bit.ly/thebaldandthebeautifulpodcast
If you want to support the show, and get all the episodes ad-free go to: https://thebaldandthebeautiful.supercast.com
To check out future Live Podcast Shows, go to: https://trixieandkatya.com/#tour
To check out the Trixie Motel in Palm Springs, CA: https://www.trixiemotel.com
Listen and Watch Anywhere!
http://bit.ly/thebaldandthebeautifulpodcast
Follow Trixie:
Official Website: https://www.trixiemattel.com
TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@trixie
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/trixiemattel
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/trixiemattel
Twitter (X): https://twitter.com/trixiemattel
Follow Katya:
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Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/katya_zamo
Twitter (X): https://twitter.com/katya_zamo
#TrixieMattel #KatyaZamo #BaldBeautiful
Jul 14
52 min

Once upon a time in a magical far-off land, Trixie Mattel, the undisputed Royal Duchess of Drag, believed herself to be best friends with Maria Bamford, the realm's undeniable Queen of Comedy. Having followed her through every enchanted television program and neighborhood comedy special, the parasocial relationship grew and grew like a magical beanstalk. Although Trixie had adored her from afar for twenty years, the two had never met until fate summoned them to a mystical Burbank podcast studio, where together they feasted upon ceremonial donuts from Maria’s legendary 9:00am comedy court. And thus their imaginary friendship became real at last, proving that even the grandest fairy tales may come true, provided the castle is less than two miles from Maria's home.
Go see Maria Bamford live! Head to: https://mariabamford.com/
To get simple, online access to personalized, affordable care for ED, Hair Loss, Weight Loss, and more, visit: https://Hims.com/BALD
Head to Squarespace.com for a free trial, and when you’re ready to launch, save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain by going to: https://www.Squarespace.com/BALD
Don’t let stigma stand in the way of support. Start therapy with BetterHelp! Sign up and get 10% off at: https://BetterHelp.com/BALD
Follow Trixie: @TrixieMattel
Follow Katya: @Katya_Zamo
To check out our Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/cw/trixieandkatya
To watch the podcast on YouTube: http://bit.ly/TrixieKatyaYT
To check out our official YouTube Clips Channel: https://bit.ly/TrixieAndKatyaClipYT
Don’t forget to follow the podcast for free wherever you're listening or by using this link: https://bit.ly/thebaldandthebeautifulpodcast
If you want to support the show, and get all the episodes ad-free go to: https://thebaldandthebeautiful.supercast.com
To check out future Live Podcast Shows, go to: https://trixieandkatya.com/#tour
To check out the Trixie Motel in Palm Springs, CA: https://www.trixiemotel.com
Listen and Watch Anywhere!
http://bit.ly/thebaldandthebeautifulpodcast
Follow Trixie:
Official Website: https://www.trixiemattel.com
TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@trixie
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/trixiemattel
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/trixiemattel
Twitter (X): https://twitter.com/trixiemattel
Follow Katya:
Official Website: https://www.welovekatya.com
TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@katya_zamo
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/welovekatya
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/katya_zamo
Twitter (X): https://twitter.com/katya_zamo
#TrixieMattel #KatyaZamo #BaldBeautiful
Jul 7
1 hr 4 min

Dim the lights, dear podcast friends, and settle in for a delightful tale. In a world where no cohesive thought process exists for long, two drag queens sat before their microphones in a Pepto-Bismol-hued studio and caused such merry confusion that even the producer could not help but guffaw. In this colorful void, the queens told their listeners about a secret Patreon kingdom filled with bonus tales, extra chatter, and all manner of delightful nonsense for their most loyal subjects. Before long, they began remembering the day one of them appeared on RuPaul’s Drag Race All Stars Season 2, arriving with an air of hope, optimism, and the undeserved courage of a knight entering an enchanted castle. And so the recording continued in cheerful disorder, until they had somehow transformed an ordinary afternoon into a golden tale of friendship, foolishness, and comedy gold. To check out their royal Patreon, simply head to: https://www.patreon.com/c/trixieandkatya
Patio season is here and these deals won’t last! Get your outdoor space ready for way less at: https://Wayfair.com
Try Mood's incredible line of cannabis gummies! Save 20% off your first order with promo code BALD at: https://Mood.com
Get a free can of Olipop! Buy any 2 cans of Olipop in store, and we'll pay you back for one! Just go to: https://drinkolipop.com/BALD
Patients shouldn’t suffer because of their laws. Our communities deserve better. To get involved and support Planned Parenthood, text UPDATE to 22422
Listen to Heads Will Roll: Heir Apparent, available now on Audible! To start listening today, go to: https://Audible.com/headswillrollseries
To get simple, online access to personalized, affordable care for ED, Hair Loss, Weight Loss, and more, visit: https://Hims.com/bald
Follow Trixie: @TrixieMattel
Follow Katya: @Katya_Zamo
To watch the podcast on YouTube: http://bit.ly/TrixieKatyaYT
To check out our official YouTube Clips Channel: https://bit.ly/TrixieAndKatyaClipYT
Don’t forget to follow the podcast for free wherever you're listening or by using this link: https://bit.ly/thebaldandthebeautifulpodcast
If you want to support the show, and get all the episodes ad-free go to: https://thebaldandthebeautiful.supercast.com
To check out future Live Podcast Shows, go to: https://trixieandkatya.com/#tour
To check out the Trixie Motel in Palm Springs, CA: https://www.trixiemotel.com
Listen and Watch Anywhere!
http://bit.ly/thebaldandthebeautifulpodcast
Follow Trixie:
Official Website: https://www.trixiemattel.com
TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@trixie
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/trixiemattel
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/trixiemattel
Twitter (X): https://twitter.com/trixiemattel
Follow Katya:
Official Website: https://www.welovekatya.com
TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@katya_zamo
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/welovekatya
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/katya_zamo
Twitter (X): https://twitter.com/katya_zamo
#TrixieMattel #KatyaZamo #BaldBeautiful
Jun 30
1 hr 16 min

Once upon a Silver Lake lanai, beneath a moon so bright it seemed personally sponsored by comradery and friendship, Dame Trixie Mattel met Emmy-nominated comedian and actor Robby Hoffman, and before the iced drinks could sweat through their cocktail napkins, a legendary best-friendship was born. In this episode of The Bald and the Beautiful, Trixie sits down with Robby to trace the wildly improbable, yet deeply hilarious road from having almost nothing but nerve, humor, and cockroaches, to becoming a powerhouse comedian with a gorgeous wife and a life so wonderful it sounds like the ending of a YA romance novel written by a semi-anxious adult. It is a joyful tale of friendship, comedy, and pure destiny, proving that sometimes the greatest adventures begin on a stained lanai.
Use code 50BALD to get 50% off your first month, then 20% off for two months! Head to: https://Greenchef.com/50BALD
Patients shouldn’t suffer because of their laws. Our communities deserve better. To get involved and support Planned Parenthood, text UPDATE to 22422
To get simple, online access to personalized, affordable care for ED, Hair Loss, Weight Loss, and more, visit: https://Hims.com/BALD
To save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain, go to Squarespace.com for a free trial, and when you’re ready to launch, head to: https://Squarespace.com/BALD
Get a free can of Olipop! Buy any 2 cans of Olipop in store, and we'll pay you back for one! Just go to: https://drinkolipop.com/BALD
Try Mood's incredible line of cannabis gummies! Save 20% off your first order with promo code BALD at: https://Mood.com
Follow Trixie: @TrixieMattel
Follow Katya: @Katya_Zamo
To watch the podcast on YouTube: http://bit.ly/TrixieKatyaYT
To check out our official YouTube Clips Channel: https://bit.ly/TrixieAndKatyaClipYT
Don’t forget to follow the podcast for free wherever you're listening or by using this link: https://bit.ly/thebaldandthebeautifulpodcast
If you want to support the show, and get all the episodes ad-free go to: https://thebaldandthebeautiful.supercast.com
To check out future Live Podcast Shows, go to: https://trixieandkatya.com/#tour
To check out the Trixie Motel in Palm Springs, CA: https://www.trixiemotel.com
Listen and Watch Anywhere!
http://bit.ly/thebaldandthebeautifulpodcast
Follow Trixie:
Official Website: https://www.trixiemattel.com
TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@trixie
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/trixiemattel
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/trixiemattel
Twitter (X): https://twitter.com/trixiemattel
Follow Katya:
Official Website: https://www.welovekatya.com
TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@katya_zamo
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/welovekatya
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/katya_zamo
Twitter (X): https://twitter.com/katya_zamo
#TrixieMattel #KatyaZamo #BaldBeautiful
Jun 23
55 min
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