Show notes
So, we’ve had some listeners reach out with some questions about sex, and more specifically, questions about female orgasm. For most young couples getting married you know that while sex is awesome, it takes a while to develop sexual competence.
To give you some great help, we interviewed an expert in the field of sexuality – Shannon Ethridge. She is an awesome resource, one we highly recommend, and we encourage you to reach out to her. The links to find her are at the bottom of this post.
Shannon Ethridge’s Story
I’d like to share this with you to give you hope! Even if you began your sexual history in ways you are not proud of, you can be an overcomer and be a great sex partner in your marriage.
As an adolescent, Shannon had a very promiscuous sex life. The root cause being she felt so disconnected from her Dad and brother. When Shannon was 4, her 8-year-old sister died. Her family seemed to shut down at that time, so she grew up very hungry for attention and affection.
When she turned 11-12 and started to develop hips and breasts, she had some uncles who taught her how to get attention and affection by playing inappropriate games. That groomed her until she was 14 when she gave her virginity away looking for love, as she says, “in all the wrong places” and starting her on a trajectory of promiscuity for the next 5 or 6 years.
In her early 20’s, she met a 6’7” spiritual giant of a man who was still a virgin. Assuming he wouldn’t want anything to do with a girl like her, she told him a bit about her past. He replied, “Shannon, I don’t love you because of your past, I love you for who you are now and who God created you to be and I want to help you become who God created you to be.”
Unfortunately, as Shannon noted, putting a wedding band on her finger did not transform her sexuality and fix all her problems. It was a few short years into their marriage when Shannon realized she needed to sift through and sort out all her sexual baggage. She had stopped the promiscuity, but in the process had stopped her sexuality for her husband as well.
Shannon had to find a happy medium where she was an active, interested sex partner, but only with her husband. Now, given that they just celebrated their 25th wedding anniversary, I’d say they are a success story!
Another neat thing I found with Shannon is that she and I are both passionate about helping others create their own success story and in this episode, we want to do just that with you, our reader/listener.
Given that part of a successful marriage is a healthy sex life, Shannon and I talked about sex and more specifically female orgasm. What I’ve written below reads more like a blog post, but credit for this great content goes to Shannon!
Question: Why is it that men are usually always ready to go, and for women, well, it takes some work to have an orgasm?
Men are usually ready at the drop of a hat to have sex, but for them, sex is also finished at the drop of a hat. Women take much longer to reach orgasm, sometimes ten times longer, but it means that she gets to enjoy the pleasure for that much longer. Sex is not a race.
Just because it takes a wife longer, does not mean that she shouldn’t expect her husband to do this for her. If your husband is a good lover, he will enjoy what he is doing for you and have all the patience in the world for you to reach that climactic point.
It takes the average couple 18 years to settle into a really smooth sexual groove together. It may feel like a headache in the first few years of marriage that you’re wired so differently and that you start so differently and that you finish so differently, but work at it and it will become smoother, more enjoyable, and more euphoric.
If you’re a young wife, in those first few years of marriage where you’re trying to find your sexua...
To give you some great help, we interviewed an expert in the field of sexuality – Shannon Ethridge. She is an awesome resource, one we highly recommend, and we encourage you to reach out to her. The links to find her are at the bottom of this post.
Shannon Ethridge’s Story
I’d like to share this with you to give you hope! Even if you began your sexual history in ways you are not proud of, you can be an overcomer and be a great sex partner in your marriage.
As an adolescent, Shannon had a very promiscuous sex life. The root cause being she felt so disconnected from her Dad and brother. When Shannon was 4, her 8-year-old sister died. Her family seemed to shut down at that time, so she grew up very hungry for attention and affection.
When she turned 11-12 and started to develop hips and breasts, she had some uncles who taught her how to get attention and affection by playing inappropriate games. That groomed her until she was 14 when she gave her virginity away looking for love, as she says, “in all the wrong places” and starting her on a trajectory of promiscuity for the next 5 or 6 years.
In her early 20’s, she met a 6’7” spiritual giant of a man who was still a virgin. Assuming he wouldn’t want anything to do with a girl like her, she told him a bit about her past. He replied, “Shannon, I don’t love you because of your past, I love you for who you are now and who God created you to be and I want to help you become who God created you to be.”
Unfortunately, as Shannon noted, putting a wedding band on her finger did not transform her sexuality and fix all her problems. It was a few short years into their marriage when Shannon realized she needed to sift through and sort out all her sexual baggage. She had stopped the promiscuity, but in the process had stopped her sexuality for her husband as well.
Shannon had to find a happy medium where she was an active, interested sex partner, but only with her husband. Now, given that they just celebrated their 25th wedding anniversary, I’d say they are a success story!
Another neat thing I found with Shannon is that she and I are both passionate about helping others create their own success story and in this episode, we want to do just that with you, our reader/listener.
Given that part of a successful marriage is a healthy sex life, Shannon and I talked about sex and more specifically female orgasm. What I’ve written below reads more like a blog post, but credit for this great content goes to Shannon!
Question: Why is it that men are usually always ready to go, and for women, well, it takes some work to have an orgasm?
Men are usually ready at the drop of a hat to have sex, but for them, sex is also finished at the drop of a hat. Women take much longer to reach orgasm, sometimes ten times longer, but it means that she gets to enjoy the pleasure for that much longer. Sex is not a race.
Just because it takes a wife longer, does not mean that she shouldn’t expect her husband to do this for her. If your husband is a good lover, he will enjoy what he is doing for you and have all the patience in the world for you to reach that climactic point.
It takes the average couple 18 years to settle into a really smooth sexual groove together. It may feel like a headache in the first few years of marriage that you’re wired so differently and that you start so differently and that you finish so differently, but work at it and it will become smoother, more enjoyable, and more euphoric.
If you’re a young wife, in those first few years of marriage where you’re trying to find your sexua...