The phrase ‘grey rock’ is a metaphor for a way to deflect and/or defuse further abuse from a partner, a family member, or even a coworker. Simply put, it’s when a person who is enduring abuse purposely acts as boring as possible during encounters with their abuser.

“Using the grey rock method.”

This phrase may sound entertaining or even funny, but the meaning behind grey rocking is anything but.

For therapists who work with clients struggling in relationships with abusers or narcissists, this is one concept that has likely been the topic of many conversations and counseling sessions. So what is grey rocking, when should you use it, and when should you avoid it?

 

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