Brought to you in league-mandated adherence to board of governors’ adopted corporate values, it's the HockeySport Podcast! In this heavily redacted episode, your loyal hosts will be covering all the biggest stories of the 2023-24 NHL regular season. And for the first time ever, this episode is 100% guaranteed to not stand for or believe in anything. No causes, no special jerseys and certainly no acts of dissent against the all powerful authority of the NHL! So buckle in for league approved stories, including: The utopic post-racism society that the NHL has created through a mere pinch Orwellian doublethink The Oilers 100% definite and fully deserved path from last place to Stanley Cup glory The annual rounding up and quartering of the cowards and traitors Jim Rutherford and Patrik Allvin clapping bombs and breaking knees with special guest, the unnamed threatening muscle of the National Hockey League!

Thank you for attending our First Annual "Welcome New Fans Symposium". It's so great to see new fans from Las Vegas, Raleigh, Dallas, and Sunrise who have made the trip. The NHL is so so so very happy you're here and ready to become Hockey's newest super fans! Don't forget to wear your I.D. badges and we'd like to kindly remind our friends from Vegas either lay of that Sweet Nevada Cactus or at least pass that shit around. This symposium will cover all the hottest stories that a fresh-faced new fan needs to know, including: Does the Stanley Cup really exist? Should we ever talk about Bedard again or is he dead to us? The Top 7 most dastardly plans by the NHL's resident super villain, Alex Pietrangelo 5 Tech tips for Refs struggling to get back to their home screen on their iPads And, due to a clerical error, we completely forgot to talk about the Maple Leafs, so don't tune in for that if that's what your looking for.

This is your chance to join the HockeySport Podcast's various letter writing campaigns to fix the NHL one tea stained parchment at a time. In this, our 39th episode spectacular, we'll be sending handwritten, tear stained notes to all your favourite stars, including: Gary Bettman (and anyone with the name or email Gary Bettman) Ryan Reynolds, owner of the sooner to be re-relocated Ottawa Canucks (Trust us this will work) Blake Lively Future Connor Bedard teammate Rasmus Andersson Bo Horvat (MLS® Number: R2754679) The Boston Bruins' Mascot "The Villain" 2011 Conn Smyth Winner Raffi Torres

The HockeySport Podcast is proud to present the world's first hockey podcast written entirely by Chat_DMT. This episode we tackle all the latest issues in the hockey world and all of the hockey world that we're late to tackle. Including: "The Rise and Fall of the Third Atlanta Franchise" "The Vancouver Canucks; history's worst built tank" "The Staal Brothers: famously against dudes in pairs" "Key regular season's statistics that will matter in the playoffs. (Hint: there are none)" "What did we all do deserve this Bruins team?" Plus, one lucky listener will win a .zip file or e-transfer of all our unreleased, unrecorded episodes! So, come break on through with us on a wild recap of the hockey world that is sure to give you acid flashbacks for years to come.

What's the secret to eternal life? Boiled Hotdogs, Milk in Bags, and T3 lines. At least that's according to the fittest and most everlasting NHL players. Join us for our senior citizen special, dedicated to the immortal and still kicking-ass Steve Wochy, who's 99 years young!  On this episode of the HockeySport Podcast, we've got health tips from Chara, Marchand, Kessel and all the other players that are going to somehow outlive you. We dive into the NHL Trade Deadline, The Calgary Flames unlikely mascot (who isn't a human torch) and the Arizona Coyotes new home at the Arizona State University Library's Applebee's! Plus the Olympics happened, finally answering the age old question of "if a tree falls in the woods but it doesn't have NHL players, does it make a sound". Plus, we might mention the Canucks once or constantly! Enjoy.

Are you an NHL player bummed to be missing your chance at Olympic glory? Follow our easy step-by-step guide to joining your brethren on Team Canada and bringing home the Gold. And all you have to do is be dead for a little while! Plus 6 other brilliant options for deceiving the NHL that will leave Gary Bettman scratching his head while your biting on gold (cause they do that for some reason). Plus we dive deep into the world of HockeySport, with thrilling, clickable, flavor-packed stories, including: "The New York Islanders: Better or Worse than the dumpster fire 2012 LA Kings?" "Are the Oilers Copying the Flames by Copying the Canucks?" "7 nice compliments for the 7 shittiest, most embarrassing,  laughing-stock teams in the NHL" "Expectations soar! The Canucks five-peat could become a seven-peat" And so so much more more!

When there's shocking breaking news in the world of the Canucks, we're there to bring you all the details. When that shocking breaking news turn out to be a load of progandic bollocks, you better believe we'll be the only one's bringing you the truth. Don't believe your eyes or your ears, Jim Benning is still the GM of the Vancouver Canucks. In this *emergency pod*, we're covering all the ups and downs in the craziest week in Canuck, nay, NHL history. Bruce Boudreau (sp?) is in, Travis Green is out. Jim Benning is out, but still controlling everything from a shadowy realm no other journalsportists dare to tread.  Join us if you dare.

Join us for our least stressful episode yet! How could you possibly be stressed about the 2021-22 NHL season when you have our assurances that the Canucks will and in some sense already have brought home the Stanley cup. So Relax. Don't stress. Close your eyes. Breath in, buy out. Breath in, buy out. It's all going to work out. The Canucks will win the Cup this year. Give in to the Borg Amalgamation that is the Columbus Blue Jackets. Follow your Captain Phillip Kessel.  Fear not the Con-air Mc-David, who has certainly peaked. Think not of the Lightning, for they have been relegated. Stress not about the Kraken, for they have been moved to Honolulu. The Canuck five-peat starts now. Chant with us: Oliverekmanlarsson. Oliverekmanlarsson. Grab a Danish and enjoy our newest episode.

You ask, we deliver - it’s our Fantasy Playoff Preview! The number one question we get, (besides where can I buy what you two are smoking?) is “what are your fantasy hockey predictions?? Well hold onto you beards, it’s finally happening. Everything you need to know about the world of Fantasy hockey. And what a strange mythical world it is. Saddle-up and join us as we go series by series and discuss: How will the Avalanche get past Jason Biggington and The Blues? What’s the over-under of Marchand-Chara licks per 60? Can any amount of trained Panthers stop and back-from-the-dead Kucherov? Top 3 films from Sean Avery’s new and thriving porn company. And to top it off, a breakdown of the North division so in-depth you’ll be frozen solid with ice cold Canadian hockey knowledge. Stay tuned!

With the playoffs right around the corner, we've got the full rundown of everything you need to know about all the playoff teams. You heard right, we're not going to talk about the Canucks. No sir. We've really branched out. Full coverage! We promise. Okay, maybe a little about the Canucks. But then it's straight into the team fighting for Lord Stanley's mug! That's all we care about and we're bringing it right to you. All eyes on the playoff teams. Full steam ahead! Islanders. Wild. Hurricanes. Yessir.  We're dying to talk about the #Canes. Try and stop us! Full playoff coverage or your money back! Brace yourselves for too much information about the Canes. You ever heard of Teuvo Teräväinen? Cause we sure have. You're going to be screaming "please stop saying such interesting things about Teuvo Teräväinen". But we won't stop. We're that commited. You're welcome.   But first up Canucks vs. Flames