The Emotional Eating (and Everything Else) Podcast

On my last podcast episode, Heidi Andersen and I had a fantastic discussion about embodiment and how vital it is to be in your body in order to heal your relationship with it.  (If you didn't listen to it yet, check it out here!)   After Heidi and I recorded that episode, I told her she had an open invitation to come back onto the show and expand on anything that we had just discussed. This invitation turned into the idea of her walking me through some embodiment exercises on the show that you could do as well. We immediately scheduled another recording and voila!  This week's episode was done! Just a reminder about Heidi and why she's the perfect person to be talking about this topic.  Heidi is a Licensed Clinical Mental Health Counselor Supervisor, Certified Body Trust® Specialist, Certified Safe and Sound Protocol Provider, Registered Yoga Teacher and Embodiment Specialist. She currently supports clients with Reclaiming Beauty, an outpatient group practice of body-centered psychotherapists specializing in weight inclusive treatment for the intersection of trauma, attachment wounds, and eating disorders through a body liberation lens and somatic approach. Heidi believes embodiment heals and combines her studies of Somatic Internal Family Systems, Embodied Recovery for Eating Disorders, Sensorimotor Psychotherapy and the Center for Body Trust® in her support of her clients. She is also the author of the Reclaiming Beauty Journal and Wisdom Deck, a resource created to support women in building a self-compassionate relationship with their body. As we discussed in last week's episode, Heidi defines embodiment as:   The ability to land safely in our body in the present moment, just how we are. For many of us, this takes some practice, patience, and guidance.  And this is where Heidi comes in.  When we discussed this episode, Heidi told me that she had a "million" embodiment exercises.  In the interest of time, she chose to do three. We start the episode with talking about why it's so important to work toward embodiment.  Some of the many reasons for this are: Noticing how your body can be a resource (this might be news to your parts!) Learning how your body can help you regulate your nervous system Helping to shift the "violent" thoughts we tend to send toward our bodies  Feeling comfortable with no longer avoiding your body Heidi then walks me through three different exercises, checking in with my parts as we go along.  It was an insightful experience for me, and I know it will be for you too! Again, connecting with your body is a necessary part of healing your relationship with it, and I hope that these exercises help you to either begin that journey or further the work you're already doing.  Take a listen!

On this week's episode, I'm speaking with Certified Body Trust® Specialist Heidi Andersen about the topic of embodiment, something that she sees as vital to the healing of food and body issues.  And in case you're not quite sure how to define embodiment, Heidi describes it as: The ability to land safely in our body in the present moment, just how we are. How lovely is that??  Can you image how your food and body issues would just melt away if you experienced this? Let me back up here for a minute and introduce Heidi to you. Heidi Andersen is a Licensed Clinical Mental Health Counselor Supervisor, Certified Body Trust® Specialist, Certified Safe and Sound Protocol Provider, Registered Yoga Teacher and Embodiment Specialist. During her therapist career, she has worked as a therapist in residential, PHP, IOP and outpatient levels of care with people struggling with eating disorders. Heidi currently supports clients with Reclaiming Beauty, an outpatient group practice of body-centered psychotherapists specializing in weight inclusive treatment for the intersection of trauma, attachment wounds, and eating disorders through a body liberation lens and somatic approach. Heidi also provides consultation, mentorship and consult groups for professionals, as well as trainings, workshops and retreats. Heidi believes embodiment heals and combines her studies of Somatic Internal Family Systems, Embodied Recovery for Eating Disorders, Sensorimotor Psychotherapy and the Center for Body Trust® in her support of her clients. She is also the author of the Reclaiming Beauty Journal and Wisdom Deck, a resource created to support women in building a self-compassionate relationship with their body. As you can see, she really knows what she's talking about! Heidi and I cover a lot of ground in this episode, but the key takeaway is this:   you must heal your relationship with your body in order to heal your relationship with food.  I'll let Heidi say it herself: “You can’t really heal what’s happening in the body unless you really bring the body to the forefront.” Heidi discusses how previous (and unfortunately current) eating disorder treatment models don't involve the body at all--they're merely focused on the mind.  This makes absolutely no sense, since eating disorders are very often a result of body shame and/or a disconnection from the body.  Therefore, working on being in your body is a giant piece of the work. On this episode, Heidi and I also talk about:  How to talk about size and weight with clients Why anger can help us heal the shame that we’ve internalized The fact that diet culture is a reflection white supremacy culture, colonization, and racism  How embodiment is the antidote to body image issues Why it’s wrong to say that body image is the last part of the process of healing from an eating disorder How to start becoming more embodied We also talk about the three categories of protectors that Heidi tends to see disconnecting us from our bodies.  Those are: Self-Objectifying parts (those who have learned that you're an object, not a subject) Parts who are invested in diet culture as an attachment figure Parts who use disembodiment to avoid pain that the body is carrying related to past trauma As you can see, we covered a lot!  Take a listen! Where to find Heidi: https://www.reclaimingbeauty.com/ Other links we mentioned: Center for Body Trust https://centerforbodytrust.com/   Embodied Recovery for Eating Disorders https://embodiedrecovery.org/   Somatic IFS https://www.embodiedself.net/   IFS Viewpoint on Dieting and Cultural Harm https://ifs-institute.com/resources/articles/ifss-viewpoint-dieting-and-cultural-harm   Diet Culture as an Attachment Figure https://www.reclaimingbeauty.com/blog/satisfaction-may-not-be-your-until-you-break-it-off-with-diet-culture   Killing Us Softly, Then and Now https://youtu.be/MQ3ESVKighs?si=DQP25QWm5Etca2Es   Where to Find Me: drkimdaniels.com Instagram TikTok  

I'll get right to it and be honest.  Part of this week's podcast topic--GLP-1 medication--is not something I've really wanted to talk about.  These are the medications that we're all hearing about nonstop--the ones that Oprah talked about in her recent special.  I haven't wanted to give them much air time, because we hear about them so much everywhere else, and also because I don't really think my opinion on them matters.  Although it's true that I have significant concerns about these medications and wish that we could move past weight loss as a goal, I also truly believe in bodily autonomy.  If these medications seem right to you, what does it matter what I think of them? So, I do mention them on this week's podcast, but it's only briefly and it's only to say two things: If you're looking into taking them, please do your own independent research.  Hopefully, you have a trustworthy physician who's looking out for your best interests.  But if you don't, you might have someone who's not giving you all of the information.  So please please please research the heck of them. If you do take them/are taking them, please listen to what your body is telling you.  If you're having any type of negative side effects, please take that seriously.  All medications can have serious consequences, so you definitely want to listen to your body. Moving on... What I really wanted to focus on this week is food noise.  This is a term you've probably heard about because they tend to talk a lot about it when they talk about GLP-1s.  And since it seems like people are always talking about GLP-1s, they're also talking a lot about food noise. Food noise isn't an official term or diagnosis--I don't know who coined it, but someone did and now that's how we refer to the constant internal chatter about food.  This might be your experience:  constantly thinking about food.  That's food noise.  It seems as though medication and even bariatric surgery have been found to quiet or at least decrease food noise in some people. But why is that? No one really knows (one of my many sarcastic parts just rolled her eyes and said "Of course not...").  Sure, it may be due to some physiological change that the medication or surgery causes, such as a change in hormones related to hunger.  But I don't think for one second that it's entirely physical.  I think it makes total sense that it's at least a little bit psychological.  And of course, that relates to parts.   In this episode, we're talking about the psychological factors that might be at play here in the quieting of food noise.  I give you four reasons why I think food noise quiets with medications/surgery (spoiler alert:  it's not because of the medication or surgery itself), which leads into a discussion on why you don't need medication or surgery to get food noise to soften.   If you're someone who experiences loud levels of food noise, my heart goes out to you.  I know that can be at the very least irritating and at times even debilitating.  I can absolutely understand wanting to do whatever it takes to make it stop.  Hopefully, this week's podcast can shed some light on how to do that without medication/surgery, or in tandem with them.  

I have a question for you.  What do you know about your early years?  Like from birth to age two?  And what do you know about your mom's pregnancy with you?   If you're like me, not a whole lot. Turns out, though, this is really good information to have.  According to this week's podcast guest, Colleen West, these early years and your experiences within have an incredible influence on the development of your relationship with food. Especially when it comes to the nurturance and attunement given to you by your caretakers.  I'll let Colleen explain it herself: "For babies that don’t get tended to reliably, they end up with more need to autoregulate, to soothe from the outside. And that often gets linked with food. And it begins a whole lot of other behaviors and deep burdens that last long into your life, unless those young parts get cared for." Did that just resonate with a lot of your parts?  I know it did with mine. Preverbal parts are Colleen's specialty, and I'm thrilled to have her back on the show to take a much deeper dive than we did in our first conversation (catch that episode here).  Colleen is all about creating connection: between you and your parts, between you and your loved ones, between you, your community, and the wider world. She is unabashedly optimistic about the human capacity to heal, to tap into the wellspring of compassion that is Self. Her professional focus is healing preverbal attachment trauma.  As a Marriage and Family Therapist and IFS Consultant, she devotes herself to training and mentoring psychotherapists, and writing. Thanks to Zoom, she is training therapists all over the world. She is author of We All Have Parts: An Illustrated Guide to Healing Trauma with Internal Family Systems (2021) and The IFS Flip Chart (2023). She lives in the San Francisco Bay Area with her husband and the fabulous dog Sky. In her leisure, she likes spending time in nature and preparing feasts for family and friends. More at www.colleenwest.com and www.smarttherapytools.com. On this week's podcast, Colleen and I talk about how those early years are so important, and how a lack of nurturance and attunement by parents (with even the best of intentions) can lead to the use of food--or the restriction of food--as a soothing mechanism.  In the episode, we discuss: Why hunger can lead to feelings of panic How a lack of nurturance in infancy leads to feelings of loneliness, isolation, and fear, and how all of that can impact our relationship with food How our early experiences can lead us to disconnect from our bodies and their experiences of hunger The behavioral cues that indicate a lack of nurturance in infancy How IFS can help to heal the exiles that weren't cared for Colleen also leaves us with three important points: If you're currently a parent of young children, do your best to be present with them; If you're in therapy, slow down and notice your parts and your bodily sensations, and focus on your preverbal years; and Your own Self-Energy can heal your parts. This was truly a wonderful, aha-inducing episode that I know will resonate with your parts.  Take a listen! You can find Colleen at: www.colleenwest.com www.smarttherapytools.com Where to find me: drkimdaniels.com Instagram TikTok And if you'd like to take a deep dive into your own relationship with food, considering joining one of my Food and Body Freedom groups for therapists/practitioners and for non-therapists.

If you celebrated Easter yesterday (and even if you didn't), you probably have some leftover candy in your house.  Which means you also probably have some parts who are very anxious about this candy.  Or who have already eaten quite a bit of it.  Or who have put it high up on a shelf so that hopefully you'll forget about it. Having a lot of candy in the house can be difficult for some of our parts.  It can also be a big party for others!  Likely, you're going back and forth between wanting to eat it all and hoping your willpower holds out so that you don't eat any. Both sides of that polarization are extreme, aren't they?  No, it's probably not great for your body to binge on a lot of chocolate.  But it's also totally normal to eat candy. On this week's podcast, we're talking about how to handle this polarization.  It's a pretty short episode so we aren't diving too deep, but I wanted to at least offer some perspective and support. So...what do you do about this candy? First and foremost, remind yourself that these are parts.  It's very easy to become blended with these parts quickly and seemingly completely.  But these are parts.  They are not Self.  Yes, your Self may enjoy some candy, but it's not feeling obsessed about eating it.  Self is also not adamant that you don't eat the candy.  Again--do your best to remind yourself that these are parts. Second, remind yourself that the parts that want to eat the candy and the parts who want to restrict the candy are all trying to protect you in the only way they know how.  Take some time to get to know them and get curious about who they're protecting. Third, hold a little meeting with your parts.  Ask anyone who has anything to do with the candy to meet with you and talk about what's going on for them.  And ask them to give you space so that you get to know everyone.  Try to figure out a way to handle the candy that everyone can agree to.  That may not be possible, but I would almost guarantee that it will be a less extreme polarization than it was previously. And finally, if and when you do eat the candy, eat it mindfully.  Really take the time to notice it, taste it, and enjoy it.  Actually, if you slow down and eat it mindfully, you might realize that you don't even like it.  Sometimes our kid parts take over and lead us to food that our adult selves just don't even like any more. I hope that helps, and I hope that you're able to feel more peaceful in your own home.  Just keeping getting to know the parts of you that have anything to do with food, and you'll be ready for the next candy season! Where to find me: drkimdaniels.com Instagram TikTok

Trigger warning: on this episode, we're talking about trauma and how traumatic experiences can impact your relationship with food and your body.  If you're just not up for this topic, take care of yourself and pass it by. Trauma and eating disorders often go hand-in-hand.  Indeed, research has suggested that up to 50% of those diagnosed with eating disorders meet the criteria of PTSD.  So if we're going to talk about food and body concerns, we need to talk about trauma.  From an IFS perspective, it makes complete sense that some of your parts would use food to manage the impact of trauma.  Providing traumatized parts with food is one way to comfort them.  Food is also a great way to distract yourself and numb your system.  And restricting food can be highly effective in distracting yourself and feeling a much-needed sense of control. It also makes complete sense that your parts would develop negative feelings toward your body if you've experienced trauma--especially trauma on or about your body.   This is a topic that I really want to delve into, which is why I invited my colleague Cinna Holsclaw to join me in discussing it.  Cinna is a licensed clinical social worker with a practice in Utah.  She’s a certified level 2 trained IFS therapist who is also trained in EMDR and Brainspotting.  Cinna specializes in PTSD and c-PTSD and is very much aware of the correlation between trauma and food and body concerns.  She's also just one of the nicest people I’ve ever met in my life, so I’m really excited to have her on. Because this is such an important topic, Cinna and I will be recording a few episodes on trauma and food/body concerns, and we're also in the planning stages of developing trainings on the topic.  We're also planning a retreat for therapists and practitioners who would like to look at their own trauma history and food/body concerns as well as learn how to help their clients (if you haven't already, please head here to indicate your interest in getting more info on the retreat).   But on today’s episode, Cinna and I start with an overall discussion about trauma and how it relates to food and body concerns.  We discuss: What is c-PTSD How parts use food in various ways to cope with trauma How food physically impacts your system (i.e. why we turn to carbs for comfort!) Epigenetics and legacy burdens Again, this is just the beginning of this very important discussion so stay tuned for more.  Take a listen! Where to find Cinna: Cinnamon Holsclaw Where to find me: Where to find me: drkimdaniels.com Instagram TikTok If you're a therapist, practitioner, or coach who’s interested in joining us for a retreat (likely in early 2025), head here to let me know you'd like more info!

Let me ask you a question:  have you ever thought of yourself as a binge eater?  Or maybe you've noticed that you have a part that binges?  This is something that many people engage in at least sometimes, and for some folx it happens daily. But what exactly is binge eating?  I find that many of my clients describe themselves as binge eaters, but they actually aren't.  And to me, if you're going to use a label, be sure it's accurate. According the field of psychiatry and the DSM-V, a binge is characterized as:   Eating, in a discrete period of time (e.g., within any 2-hour period), an amount of food that is definitely larger than most people would eat in a similar period of time under similar circumstances The sense of a lack of control over eating during the episode (e.g., a feeling that one cannot stop eating or control what or how much one is eating) Honestly, I don't find this definition particularly helpful (and I go into why that is on this week's podcast episode).  But, in general, binge eating is eating a large amount of food and feeling out of control.  It's not merely eating foods that you "shouldn't" or eating in response to your emotions.  I think many people don't realize this.  They consider a binge to be eating three cookies after a stressful work meeting.  That may be emotional eating, but that's not bingeing. On this week's podcast, we're talking about binge eating.  We get into: What binge eating technically is and why the diagnostic criteria are problematic Why it happens from a physical perspective Why it happens from a psychological perspective (i.e. how does IFS view binge eating) Then we get into what's known as the binge/restrict cycle.  This is a pattern wherein people go back and forth between binge eating and restricting (dieting) and back to binge eating again.  This can happen over the course of a day, a week, a couple months, or even a few years.  It's an extremely frustrating cycle that's very hard to get out of. In IFS terms, this cycle is a polarization between binge eating parts and restricting parts.  Each side takes over at different times, leaving you stuck in a ping pong match between your parts.  We discuss this cycle at length in the podcast, and we talk about how to get out of it.   If you think you've ever binged, this is a great episode to listen to.  I hope that it clarifies some things for you.  And I hope that it gives you some ideas on how to stop the cycle. And speaking of gaining more clarity, just a reminder that the Food and Body Freedom Workshop Series is starting on Tuesday, March 19th, 2024.  I've got three experiential workshops planned that will help you to understand: why you use food the way you do the familial and cultural influences on your relationship with food and your body how to treat your body with kindness You can do all three workshops or pick and choose the ones that appeal to you. Where to find me: drkimdaniels.com Instagram TikTok

Are you familiar with the Enneagram?  The "test" that views personality as nine interconnected types?  I wasn't, until about three years ago.  And even then, I took an online test, bought a book, read the chapter that corresponded with my "type," and never looked at it again. But.... I've had parts in the background of my mind who have been curious about it.  And every time I see one of Tammy Sollenbergers' posts about the Enneagram or a new group that she's starting to help you incorporate the Enneagram and IFS I think, "I need to look at that again." So I decided to reach out to Tammy and ask her to come on to the podcast to talk about it.  And thankfully, she agreed! Tammy Sollenberger is an IFS therapist and the host of the One Inside Podcast.  She's also the author of The One Inside:  Thirty Days to Your Authentic Self.  And she co-leads a course with Joan Ryan, an Enneagram expert, on using IFS and the Enneagram to "observe your patterns, unblend from parts, and make new choices." In this week's podcast Tammy and I talk about the Enneagram and how well it integrates with IFS.  Both models can help you to know yourself at a much deeper level, but using them together can add even more awareness and understanding.  And, at least for me, knowing that there are aspects of my personality that are hard-wired to see the world in a certain way, at least to some degree, helps my parts to be much less critical of how I think and what I do.   In this episode, Tammy talks about how each part has a "focus of attention," meaning a certain thing that really matters the most to them, and she goes through each type and explains that focus.  She also explains how our parts will respond differently to things based on our Enneagram type.  Like you and I could have the exact same experience, but if our types are different, our parts will react differently. AND, we get into a discussion about how the Enneagram can help you understand your relationship with food.  Tammy was able to speak to this but also connected me with Joan Ryan, an Enneagram expert, who'll be coming onto the podcast to take a much deeper dive into this.   It's all pretty fascinating, if you ask me.   And I think the combination of IFS and the Enneagram can lead to much deeper self-understanding, and ultimately a deeper level of healing.  Sign me up!  If all of that sounds interesting to you, take a listen!   Where to find Tammy: https://tammysollenberger.com/ Joan Ryan's Type Cards:  https://creativecollaborations.net/product/help-me-find-my-enneagram-type/ The book we discuss My upcoming workshop series Food and Body Freedom for Therapists and Practitioners Food and Body Freedom for Non-Therapists IFS Master Class Where to find me: drkimdaniels.com Instagram TikTok

I think many (most) of us have had the experience of feeling out-of-control with food, at least to some degree.  It feels like something or someone else has taken over and you're just along for the ride. In IFS terms, we call that being "blended" with a part.  The part has literally hijacked the system and is running the show.  And Self is very hard to access.   One of the things that my clients always want to work on is what to do in the moment when this is happening.  Which makes complete sense, right?  How can I stop the roller coaster before it even starts? But... I don't think that's where most of the work actually is.  Sure, that can be helpful, and we do talk about how to be more present and aware in those moments.  But in my experience, the real work is when this isn't happening.  The real work is getting to know your parts when your system is calm, and you have more access to Self. And we're talking about why that part of the work is so important on this week's podcast.  In this episode, we're focusing on why it's essential to regularly check in with and get to know parts within your eating system and why this is what makes it easier to unblend from your parts when they start to take over. And yes, we also talk about what to do in those moments when your parts start hijacking you.  Check it out! And if you’re interested in getting to know your parts, join me for the Food and Body Freedom Experiential IFS Workshop Series! I’m doing three workshops, all of which IFS-based and experiential (meaning no didactics), and all of which will guide you in getting to know more parts that are related to food and body concerns. You can buy the whole series for $129 or pay for one or two at $49 each. Head here for all of the details! Where to find me: Therapy website (for therapists and practitioners):  drkimdaniels.com Coaching website (for non-therapists):  yourweightisnotyourworth.com Instagram TikTok

Changing your relationship with food and with your body can be quite the complicated process, can't it?  It seems like we often take two steps forward and four (or more?) steps back.  I think that's because sometimes we go too far too fast, and we experience a backlash from parts. Let me give you an example.  Say you feel out-of-control with food sometimes (or a lot of the time).  You decide to control your eating by putting certain parameters around it.  Maybe you cut down on carbs or tell yourself you can't eat past a certain time of the day.  And maybe you do that for a while, and you feel more in-control. And then one day, you (actually, your parts) say, "f* it.  I want some bread!  And a late-night snack!"  And you start eating, seemingly with reckless abandon. In IFS, this is what we call a backlash.  You went too far in one direction (restriction) and parts rebelled against it (by breaking the rules you had set with food).  It makes total sense when you think about it.  Our parts are using and/or restricting food for a reason, and when we just try to change what they're doing, they don't like it.  We're changing their job and taking away the only way they know how to help us. This is why we need to take smaller steps when we're working toward change.   In this week's podcast, I'm talking about the concept of being "comfortably uncomfortable" during the process of healing your relationship with food and your body with my guest, Celia Clark.  Celia is a Food and Body Image Specialist who began her therapy career working in addictions.  She has completed advanced education in Eating Disorders and Complex Trauma is trained in various modalities, including Person-Centred Counselling, Family Therapy, EMDR and Internal Family Systems (IFS).  Celia now works primarily through a parts lens and believes the parts of ourselves invested in impulsive or compulsive eating behavior as a solution often have positive intentions and are unaware of the consequences. By getting to know these parts, we begin to build safety and trust within our internal system and heal the shame-based wounding and internal disconnection that so often drives our challenges with nourishment. This safety and trust also supports a return to the body, where our sense of belonging originates. By learning to reconnect with ourselves in this way, our body again becomes a place to live in and from, a place to call home. Celia and I talk about a few things in this episode, including: The concept of nourishment and how she considers nourishment to be a two-part process: that of giving nourishment to our parts and that of our parts receiving it from Self How helpful IFS has been to her own system as well as to her clients in healing food and body concerns  What Celia calls the "confusion around chaotic controlled eating" The need to become "comfortably uncomfortable" when we work toward change How to begin slowly providing for your parts’ needs I truly enjoyed our conversation, and I hope that you do too!  Head here to listen, and check out all of Celia's offerings here. Where to find me: Therapy website (for therapists and practitioners):  drkimdaniels.com Coaching website (for non-therapists):  yourweightisnotyourworth.com Instagram TikTok