Our guest this week is, Jamie Simkins, LCPC. Jamie is a Licensed Clinical Professional Counselor and is the owner of Hemispheres Counseling and founder of the Rebel Stepmom Academy. Jamie specializes in addressing the unique challenges faced by stepmothers, helping them navigate complex family dynamics and build healthy, fulfilling relationships. Holding a Master’s degree in Counseling Psychology, Jamie has further honed her skills with specialized training in family systems therapy and conflict resolution. As a stepmother herself, Jamie understands the specific issues and pressures stepmothers can encounter. She is deeply committed to creating supportive spaces for stepmothers to share their experiences and learn effective coping strategies. TUMAT Takeaways: • The way couples handle conflict is a strong predictor of the health of the relationship. Couples should focus on the way the argue rather than their occurrence, emphasizing kindness, respect, and openness. • Arguments in front of children can be traumatic; it's vital for them to see healthy disagreements and resolutions to feel secure. • Children exposed to toxic arguments may subconsciously replicate these dynamics as adults, attempting to heal childhood traumas. • Blended families need dedicated effort and intent to foster a positive environment, challenging misconceptions about abusive relationships and focusing on healing and growth. • Education and clear communication are vital in addressing the complexities of blended families. • Prioritizing the marital relationship in a blended family setting is essential for a supportive and healthy household. Connect with Jamie, here: ⁠Rebel Stepmoms⁠ ⁠Hemispheres Counseling⁠

Ashli Gibson is a Psychiatric-Mental Health Nurse Practitioner specializing in Perinatal and Reproductive Psychiatry. Ashli has a background as a Certified Nurse-Midwife in which she developed expertise in prenatal care, birth, postpartum care, and gynecology over the span of six years. Ashli also holds a certificate in Perinatal Mental Health through Postpartum Support International adding an additional level of proficiency to her skill set. In this episode, we discuss: ·      Providers should be trained in trauma-informed care to ensure patients feel comfortable during gynecological exams. ·      Proactive mental health care is important for women planning to get pregnant to address any pre-existing mental health conditions and ensure a supported journey. ·      Perinatal mental health concerns can manifest as anxiety, depression, OCD, and even postpartum psychosis. ·      Untreated postpartum anxiety and depression can have negative effects on both the mother and the baby. ·      Medication, such as SSRIs, can be safe and effective for treating mental health issues during pregnancy. ·      Infertility treatment can take a toll on mental health, and support from providers and therapists is important. ·      Having a postpartum plan and seeking help early can make a significant difference in mental health outcomes. Additional resources: Fetal brain development studies:  https://womensmentalhealth.org/posts/stress-in-pregnancy-alters-brain-development/#:~:text=Maternal%20anxiety%20was%20associated%20with,levels%20in%20the%20fetal%20brain. Pregnancy registry:  https://womensmentalhealth.org/research/pregnancyregistry/ PSI- support groups, general information, provider support: https://www.postpartum.net/Trauma informed care resource as well as a great birth resource:   https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Pf4jRfmk1j4 Zurzuvae: https://www.fda.gov/news-events/press-announcements/fda-approves-first-oral-treatment-postpartum-depression

Michael Leiter, PhD is professor emeritus of psychology at Acadia University and co-author of The Burnout Challenge: Managing People’s Relationships with Their Jobs. In this conversation, Dr. Leiter explains that burnout is more of a relational issue between individuals and their workplaces, rather than a personal problem. He defines burnout as a three-part syndrome: exhaustion, cynicism, and a loss of confidence. The conversation explores how organizations can address burnout and create a healthier work environment. It discusses the catalysts for change, such as leadership recognizing the problem and seeking help.  Some key take-a-ways: Addressing burnout requires improving the connection between individuals and their workplaces. Conducting surveys can provide valuable information about the level of burnout within an organization and help identify areas of distress. Setting boundaries and managing work-life balance are important for preventing burnout. Aligning expectations and being aware of core psychological needs can help mitigate burnout. Individuals experiencing burnout can benefit from self-reflection and open communication with managers. Check out "The Burnout Challenge", written by Michael P. Leiter and Christina Maslach, here.

This episode focuses on all things "OCD". Join Tony and Jen as the speak with one of the leading experts in the field, Nathaniel Van Kirk, PhD, to navigate the often misunderstood world of obsessive compulsive disorder. Nathaniel Van Kirk, PhD, is a licensed clinical psychologist, specializing in severe anxiety disorders, obsessive compulsive disorder (OCD), and trauma/PTSD. At McLean Hospital, Dr. Van Kirk is the director of psychological services at the OCD Institute. He is a member of the hospital’s Patient and Family Advisory Committee and Interdisciplinary Recovery Oriented Practice Committee, and also serves as the site facilitator for McLean’s Schwartz Rounds Committee. Dr. Van Kirk’s clinical research focuses on the role of motivation across treatment and the impact of trauma on treatment outcomes, and on promoting innovative methods to assess and conceptualize recovery. Additionally, he is involved in efforts to reduce mental health stigma (such as participating in McLean Hospital’s Deconstructing Stigma campaign), emphasizing the importance of bridging the gap between therapists, researchers, and those with mental health challenges, including individuals who work in the mental health field. Key notes from this episode: • OCD can manifest in various ways and is often misunderstood • Living with OCD requires learning to tolerate uncertainty and resisting the urge to engage in rituals • Early identification and intervention can help manage OCD symptoms and improve quality of life • OCD is characterized by intrusive, unwanted, repetitive, and distressing thoughts, images, feelings, urges, or impulses. • Compulsions or rituals are repetitive behaviors or mental acts aimed at neutralizing fear or distress. • OCD can manifest in various ways, including contamination concerns, fear of harm, unacceptable taboo thoughts, and perfectionism. • The brain science behind OCD involves hyperactivity in the frontal lobe and the orbital frontal cortex, leading to constant "what-if" scenarios and difficulty in completing tasks. • Treatment for OCD includes medication, such as selective serotonin reuptake inhibitors, and behavioral therapy, specifically exposure response prevention (ERP). Learn more about Dr. Van Kirk, by visiting his website, here. To learn more about OCD, visit the OCD Institutes page, here.

Join us for the second half of our conversation with Dr. Chris Wilson. We recommend you go back and listen to Pt. 1 from last week before diving into this episode. Here are some takeaways from this episode: Victimization is not a result of seeking out abusers, but rather abusers taking advantage of vulnerabilities. Apologies should involve accountability, awareness of impact, openness to coaching, and self-reflection. Psychological violence has a long-lasting impact and should be addressed alongside physical violence. Vulnerability, support, and understanding are essential in relationships. Recognizing patterns and prioritizing long-term goals of feeling loved are important for healthy relationships. Past trauma can create sensitivity and insecurity, making it difficult to identify grooming behaviors. Neglect and cultural misogyny can contribute to unhealthy relationship patterns. Challenging societal norms and beliefs is crucial in preventing and addressing abuse.

Our guest for this episode is Chris Wilson, PsyD. Chris is a retired licensed psychologist from Portland, Oregon. For eighteen years Chris worked with victims and perpetrators of crime, including seven years with the Oregon Department of Corrections. He currently runs ⁠Being Trauma Informed⁠ where he leads global training seminars on a variety of issues including the neurobiology of trauma, vicarious trauma, and being trauma informed. Chris also testifies as an expert in both civil and criminal trials. In this episode, Chris covers the following: Overview of vicarious trauma and how it differs from burnout Discussion on the concept of "threat to status" The psychology of why abusers abuse The neurobiology of why victims often stay in relationships with an abuser The anatomy of an effective apology If you, or someone you know is impacted by domestic abuse, please call the National Domestic Violence Hotline:(800)-799-7233 Beyond being an incredibly skilled and informed psychologist, Chris is also in a band called, "Larry Awesome". Check out their single, ⁠here⁠!

Neil Shortland, PhD is an Assistant Professor, Criminology and Justice Studies at University of Massachusetts Lowell. His research focuses on the psychological aspects of domestic and international security. His research portfolio includes funded projects on military decision making (cognitive and neuroscience psychology), the interaction of aggressive cognitions and extremist propaganda (cognitive psychology) and grass-roots programs aimed at counter violent extremism and building societal resistance (developmental and social psychology). Learn more about Neil, here. This episode is focused on discussing principles from, "Decision Time", a book he co-authored along with Laurence Alison, PhD. Neil is also a contributing author on the ground breaking research on field-based rapport solutions, "ORBIT". In this episode, we dive into the following topics: Benefits of making "deliberate difficult decisions" Variables that comprise "sound" decision making A discussion on the "STAR" method to decision making The role emotional intelligence plays in making value-based decisions What the future holds with developing technology assisted decision making platforms (this one is NUTS)

Colton is a retired FBI agent who also worked as the Director of Training for the High Value Detainee Group (HIG) and currently owns/operates an investigative interviewing training and consulting firm, www.pyxisacademy.com. Colton walks us through the journey of his early career with the FBI where he started working in remote areas of Alaska. He talks through the personal challenges of moving his girlfriend (later wife) to such a remote destination and shares their experiences for how they not only "made it work" but how their time in Alaska strengthened their relationship. After Alaska, Colton discusses his time with the FBI Fly Team, his persistent curiosity for learning the strategies of effective communication, and shares his personal prescription for managing his own mental health throughout every stage of his life. Key Takeaways: Invest in developing your own emotional intelligence Take time to slow down. Remember your career is one part of your story. Prioritize your relationships (with yourself and those closest to you). The most effective communicators are those who develop and project a genuine curiosity of the other person. General human psychology principles are universal in promoting effective communication. Whether dealing with a high-value terrorist subject or in a disagreement with a co-worker, there are universal principles that work in nearly all settings. Resistance comes from projecting judgement. The event in question should be in the background. Learning about who the person is, their values and the context that got them there is the answer.

Here we go! Check out the introductory episode of our brand new podcast, "Tell Us More About That" (TUMAT)! Join us for this first short episode as we introduce ourselves and provide some context for what TUMAT is all about. In addition to introducing ourselves and the TUMAT concept, we also give a sneak peak into the topics for the first round of episodes. Learn more about us and our podcast by checking out our website, www.tellusmoreaboutthat.com. You can leave comments, submit episode topic requests and sign-up to be the first to hear when our newest episodes drop. Be sure to SUBSCRIBE and leave us a REVIEW! Cheers, Tony and Jen