Que pendejadas are you guys talking now? I think Eric wanted to throw putasos with Jaydog over some bullsh*t. Pero tranquilo, cabron. The orange chicken is getting cold, and Jaydog's just talking mamadas again. Besides, you guys got the world's problems to solve. Juntos, amigos, y ya! Now pass the chow mein, foo, I'm hungry.

¿Naranjas? Well... I have been feeling a little mocoso recently. ¡Ay cabrón! Hey, I heard oranges are good for vitamin C. But you know what will fix me up better is a pocket full of cash and it sounds like you two crazy foos got all the inside story on how to take your orange hustle up to mafia levels. Just don't try to get me to subscribe to your money-making system, foo - I got my own buyers and suppliers. Ya sabes.

You can talk all you want about celebrities, but hey, foo, don't be talking about my girls the Kardashians! You're going to ruin any chance of making them my hyna. But, hey you're doing the Lord's work by double checking on where our tequila comes from, even though no one cares how it got in the shot glass. En serio, no one cares if it came from Chicago or from El Guapo's stash from what he stole from the citizens of Santo Poco before those foos fought back. Que Viva Los Amigos! Que Viva! 

Would someone please find this woman? She's in all the salsa music and nobody seems to know where she ran off to. I don't know if these two stand any better chance, but hey, can't blame them for trying. That girl has tumbao like a Kardashian. She'll be easy to spot once you find her. While they're looking for this hyna, Jaydog and Eric debate whether we really landed on the moon, and who has the better celebrity chisme. They sound like a couple old ladies, fa real. (Ehhhhh! just playing!)

The Season 2 Opener - Taco Friday is BACK, foo! That's a lot of menudo to get over the Season 1 hangover, homies. The pandemic really did a job on these vatos and they lost all their patience for just about everything, except for tacos and beer. And tonterias. Lots of tonterias. Dang... another season of you two clowns? Alright, where are my seeds? 

Season 1 Finale - FINALLY! Ehhhhhh! Just in time for Cinco de Boracho! Daaaaaang... how long did you foos get locked up for? When did you get out??? Jaydog said he found this episode in the back with the other Hispanics, but this episode smells more like The SHU than Fabuloso. So let's see, the lost episode, huh? Riiiiiight. Eric's got a new business going with his Chamacos On Loan program, Jaydog gives a clinic on roasting coffee on the barbecue, and they're both trying to figure out a good appliance to give the novios at the next wedding they get invited to, I mean, if their PAROLE OFFICERS say it's okay. Chale, homes. Know wut? Next time you get thrown in the pinta let a guy know, for we could come visit, foo.

Ta chao? Stah chow? Tah Ciao? WTF?

This is the place to figure out how to get over on the Tuesday Discount Pizza Night deals, while at the same time teaching the younger homies not to expect Ariana Grande to leave her day job as President to pop up and cook the posole for your sorry a$$. What I'm saying is there's good old fashioned advice here on how to live your life, homes. Get with the program. The lowrider ain't gonna fix itself - you better learn to turn a wrench, before the women take all the good jobs. Fa reals.

Orale, the only way to get Eric to stop cussing is to cut out his f&%ing tongue. Apparently that won't stop him from going up against a world heavyweight in two-facedness when he goes to challenge Jaydog to stop cussing for an entire episode. How long can they both last? Can Eric go the distance? Chale, homes. You're just gonna have to listen to Eric's story about going back to night school for his AA for like the 27th time yourself. No self-respecting vato is going to give away the surprise here in the description, cuz know what? C's get degrees, but snitches get stitches, loco.

Hey, foo. That's on you for getting married in the first place.