SWWE #64: Dangerous Emojis and Fornicating Ants This episode is brought to you by Vareschi Mastering: https://www.vareschimastering.com/ - Give 'em a visit! Welcome to 2022. This new episode of Spoken Word with Electronics teaches you about microwaves, and asks you if you've ever heard the Ant and Elephant Sex Joke. We run the math on how many ants it might take to equal a 9,000 pound elephant in bed. The episode closes with a tribute to Zip Disks as the efficiency tool of the late 1990s. Track three is a news item. Headline: DEA releases list of 'Dangerous Emojis' linked to drug use in text messages Looking to crack the code on your kids' illicit activities? The Drug Enforcement Administration has posted an "emoji drug code guide" that lets parents know the real use of gas pumps, chickens and rocket ships. These are tools children are using to purchase high quality narcotics. And to help the kids make the order correctly, the government has provided a menu. Link to the DEA chart of emojis used in drug purchases: https://www.dea.gov/sites/default/files/2021-12/Emoji%20Drug%20Code%20PDF_Final.pdf There is a measure of good intention here. Many pills bought off the street are currently laced with Fentanyl, which is a complete horror to consider. But no kid wants to take Fentanyl (unless they order it with a clear 'smiling face with tear', of course). Instead of encouraging distrust and resentment with parents and kids, the real push from the DEA should be to provide your kids with no-questions access to Fetanyl test strips: https://www.healthaffairs.org/do/10.1377/forefront.20210601.974263/full/ – Similar to just giving your kids condoms, a simple test for them to know what they're about to ingest would likely impact the death rate on laced pills. If you're already snooping on their messages for a text code (a code that can easily change, incidentally) you might consider speaking candidly over Hallmark Channel espionage. The DEA has a history of this, and it's always comical in terms of effort and effect. Synonym addicts will enjoy their word-packed 2018 PDF on Slang Terms and Code Words (which introduced me to the term 'whiffle dust', thanks for that: https://www.dea.gov/sites/default/files/2018-07/DIR-022-18.pdf Or for fans of visual aids, there is the diagram-packed 1960s/1970s "Diagram of a Drug Abuser": http://www.ep.tc/otherscenes/pdf/1960s-diagram-of-a-drug-abuser.pdf Pro-tip: If you encounter a zip disk with a happy face on its label, it might be high. Have a great new set of months, Ethan

# 64-B: "Pachydermophilia and Extinctions" by Spoken Word with Electronics

# 64-C: "EMOJI SAFETY" (D.E.A. Special Report) by Spoken Word with Electronics

# 64-D: "Zip Disks" (Charlie Pickle, Pt 46) by Spoken Word with Electronics

Happy holidays to you from us at Spoken Word with Electronics. Primary music in track two is goth santas Alien Sex Fiend, whose Stuff the Turkey should be sung around every chimney. We also review an Electro-Voice RE20, whose flat frequency curve at 5K makes it the far better microphone for this show than any Shure product. That mic comparison (RE20 vs SM57 vs SM7B) is discussed in the introduction. Enjoy the season. Oh, Mariah! This track: Demo of RE20 on a shockmount in an untreated room. Comparison of Shure SM7B and Shure SM57 to an Electrovoice RE20.

# 63-B: "Our Last Xmas?" (A. Sex Fiend and M. Carey) by Spoken Word with Electronics

# 63-C: "Don't Cry, Marie" (Charlie Pickle, Pt 44) by Spoken Word with Electronics

# 63-D: "A Home is Like a Tree" (Charlie Pickle, Pt 45) by Spoken Word with Electronics

"1, 2, 3, and 4, inside, outside!" Hi, everyone. Was amused to find a small saxophone hiding in my bottle of kombucha this week. The small pressure of a barely open lid released a torrent of improvisational jazz. If it were a plastic bottle, I'd swear this was the ghost of Ornette Coleman! This episode of SWWE also features a variety of electronic snow and other winter-related sound. Have a nice holiday. – Ethan

# 62-B: "Kombucha Saxophone Solo" (and Electronic Snow Music) by Spoken Word with Electronics