Have you ever gone down a conspiracy theory rabbit hole and suddenly found yourself thinking… "Wait… what if?" That's exactly what happened in this episode. We put on tinfoil hats, debated some of the internet's wildest conspiracy theories, accidentally got way too philosophical, and somehow ended up questioning everything from the moon landing to whether my own mother might actually be an alien. So... proceed with caution. In this episode: • My parents somehow started texting Dr. Piano Man's...

Well once again, I woke up in the middle of the night anxious, couldn’t sleep, and decided the healthiest thing to do was obviously record a podcast in my pajamas. So yes, this is another middle-of-the-night episode. In this episode: • Security and I make wedding predictions • Dr. Piano Man joins me in the studio and somehow turns my anxious spiral into a surprisingly deep conversation about life, love, and what it means to live well • We read ridiculous Reddit stories about Thanksgivin...

This episode starts with Pranking Security and then somehow turns ends with Mama Schall calling back to yell at us. Honestly, I don't think any of us were qualified to host this episode. In this episode: • I prank Security with completely fake answers to questions you guys wrote in and watch him slowly question everything he knows about my wedding • We read reddit AITA stories and debate whether someone is wrong for refusing to give up their airplane seat after paying extra for it, a fiancé s...

Episode 34: Schall We Talk about Painting Security’s Wall Wait! Hold on! What? Ok!!!! I was fully prepared to record a normal podcast episode... and then Mario Lopez (YES THAT MARIO LOPEZ) commented on my Instagram. Five minutes later we were talking about underground journal dealers, painting over a wall I once destroyed with duct tape, and the bizarre chain of events that somehow led me to Dr. Piano Man. So basically, things got off track immediately. In this episode: • Mario Lopez (aka S...

This week, Mama Schall is back!!! We asked you to send in the things you needed motherly advice on, and Mama Schall came ready. She gave opinions, disclaimers, wisdom, judgment-free guidance… and then somehow became the funniest person in the room without even trying. In this episode: Mama Schall gives advice on divorce, toxic relationships, dating again, friendships, parenting teens, and finding balance with kids. Security celebrates his birthdays and gives everyone a very reasonable gift re...

This week we are airing dirty laundry!!! You sent in your anonymous secrets, and we read them. Some were funny, some were wild, some were suspiciously specific, and one somehow led us into a possible Grandma Susie spiritual interruption. In this episode: Our secret Access Hollywood / Mario Lopez Saved by the Bell cheating scandal The behind-the-scenes panic of realizing we may have shared too much before we even started recording Your anonymous secrets about relationships, re-gifting, crushes...

We accidentally toured a house that may have been haunted. I mean: creaking 1850s floors, locked mystery sheds, a terrifying broken dollhouse, an old woman appearing from a hidden bedroom, an illegal basement apartment that looked like a crime scene, AND we got rear-ended immediately after leaving. So naturally… Dr. Piano Man and I are officially house ghost hunters. In this episode: The woman who thought I was the plumber The waterfront house that was somehow already sold while we were touri...

This episode is all unpopular opinions… and somehow turns into coffee tasting, ghost airline jokes, poop-on-a-bus discourse, and me potentially leaving New York City. So basically: business as usual. In this episode: My unpopular opinion that it’s completely okay to change your mind about life, careers, relationships, and where you want to live The shocking Zillow listing that suddenly made me want to leave Manhattan Security trying coffee for the first time ever The viral “baby diaper on the...

This episode is such a fun one because I’m joined by my cousin Sammy Schall and his drag persona, WorshipHER... so yes, you get both in one episode. We talk drag, performance, identity, family, stage life, and what it really means to be fully yourself. I’ve seen Worshipper perform so many times, but this was my first time actually sitting down and interviewing her, which made this one extra special. In this episode: Meeting both Sammy and WorshipHER Drag, glam, live performance, and behind-th...

This episode is a Mallorca recap, and honestly… you must never be bored with the Schalls. We are less than 24 hours back from Mallorca, and I had to record immediately before I forgot everything. We went for the wedding taste test, hair and makeup trial, venue planning, family meetings, and somehow turned the whole trip into a sitcom. In this episode: The official meeting of the families Traveling with the Schalls for the first time Mama Schall almost getting left in Switzerland Papa Schall s...