Welcome to “A Cowboy Christmas Romance”—exclaimed as the first Lifetime Christmas movie with a sex scene—and wow…it certainly has a cowboy. Cowfolk. On a ranch. With horsies. And maybe a midnight centaur. And do you like Christmas songs? What about just song-songs? THIS MOVIE HAS SO MANY SONGS! It’s as if a Lifetime exec said “We need the ultimate Christmas soundtrack for this Christmas movie, but let’s not get so hung up on the whole Christmas angle when they can sing about whether or not the grass is always greener on the other side. In Tubac, Arizona.” So join Kevin and Ces as they await Noel nookie in our last holiday movie podcast of the season, “A Cowboy Christmas Romance.”Brought to you by our new sponsor Zini’s Italian Restaurant: “Zini’s—Come for the eggplant. Stay for the—well don't stay because we have another party coming in 12 minutes.”"Christmas Rap" Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com)Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 4.0 Licensehttp://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/

Every December 12th since they were kids, Sarah and her best friend Nick build a "Snow Beau," a snowman that embodies everything Sarah wants in a boyfriend. But this year thanks to a magic hat—we mean scarf—the "Snow Beau" Cole actually comes to life. And he's actually pretty damn awesome. And thankfully wearing pants, so no need for blurring like that original airing of "Frosty." But of course with a new romance comes new questions—Where does a snowman get the money to take someone out on dates? How exactly is this relationship going to work once chaste Hallmark-level kissing isn't enough? And why won't ANYONE let Sarah venture outside her hometown? Not even for a day trip to Minneapolis! Come for the romance. Stay for the lingering questions about said romance. Leave because Sarah cannot. Ever. Happy Holidays!Brought to you by our new sponsor Zini’s Italian Restaurant: “Zini’s—When you’re here you have about 20 minutes because we only have the one table.”"Christmas Rap" Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com)Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 4.0 Licensehttp://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/

Love is on the air in “A Christmas Frequency” when radio producer Kenzie—who always wears a “K” necklace lest she forget how to start her signature—tries to set up her recently separated morning show host—Denise Richard’s Dr. Christmas Jones, we mean Brooke—with a series of live broadcast blind dates to lift both her boss’s holiday spirits and the shows plummeting ratings. But then Kenzie meets Ben—a man who long ago realized if he stopped smiling the Earth would explode—only to find out he’s also one of Brooke’s potential station-mandated beaus! Watch for the romantic misunderstandings. Look for Liam, a man who answers the question “What if Ralph Wiggum were 35 and British?” Keep an eye out for the fact EVERY SQUARE MILLIMETER OF EVERY SCENE IS FILLED WITH EVERY CONCEIVABLE CHRISTMAS DECORATION EVER. Then find your date for the big Christmas soirée! Brought to you by our new sponsor Zini’s Italian Restaurant: “Zini’s—When you’re here you have about 20 minutes because we only have the one table.”"Christmas Rap" Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com)Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 4.0 Licensehttp://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/

Each Christmas Jackie sends a newsletter to apparently every “Earth Dweller” touting her family as the best EVER! with such accomplishments as a pre-teen Harvard student and a husband who gets trophies for kicking pre-teens in the face. And every year newsletter recipient Charlotte wishes she could prove Jackie’s wonderful life is a lie built on clip art and discount dreams. But when an adorable tyke and the Christmas miracle of no one texting anyone EVER! bring their two families together…Charlotte loses her goddamn mind as accusations fly, boundaries disappear, vacuum cleaners explode, Cheetos are repelled, and no one EVER! takes off their snow boots when they go inside."Christmas Rap" Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com)Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 4.0 Licensehttp://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/

We did it! We made it through the first (admittedly brief) season of "Moonlighting" and what a fun ride it's been! And by "fun ride" we mean last week's episode on a train. Because THIS week's "Moonlighting" is just...wow. So wow. That's not to say it didn't try. It tried to be a Hitchcock thriller. It tried something resembling a narrative. It tried our patience. But we also learned no one in 1985 Los Angeles asked for IDs, all cabbies in 1985 Los Angeles were from 1945 Brooklyn, and 1985 David Addison might have been the star of a 1988 Tom Hanks film before it was even made. Plus, we reveal our very special holiday gift for all our loyal, infrequent, first-time, and even begrudging listeners. Enjoy! Theme Song: "Aerosol of my Love" Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 4.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/

Blue Moon Detective Agency rhyming receptionist Agnes DiPesto takes centerstage—and a nice room with carpeted walls, malfunctioning bed, and a dead body—when she wins a ticket to a famous writer's murder mystery train that runs 24 hours or 6 hours straight due to Amtrak time dilation. But then Maddie and David get stuck onboard, the famous writer proves an infamous ass, and everyone has a motive to stab away. We also see another example of Maddie's super strength and once more try to fill in the blanks of David's mysterious past by concluding he's either an ex-con, a financial fraud or something so much worse. But most important of all, we get more Agnes!Theme Song: "Aerosol of my Love" Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 4.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/

It's 2 am and you're lonely in LA, so it's time to call the Heartbreak Hotline on 1985 AM radio. But do it soon before...aaaaand our host has been shot dead live on the air. In other news, possibly covered in our new favorite fake paper the Los Angeles Tribune, we begin to suspect Maddie has superhuman strength, start to wonder if David is the heir to the Ground Round fortune, and end our working relationship with Toby the Intern. So if you're imaginary and want a fictional job, call us now!Theme Song: "Aerosol of my Love" Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 4.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/

It's got lasers! It's got psychic readings! It's got two scientists struggling to put underwear on a dummy so it can be shot—by lasers! What more could you want from TV? A CEO who pays people to pretend they had sex with him—WHEN NOT DISCUSSING LASERS?! It's got that, too! "This episode has everything" say Kevin and Ces in this very synopsis blurb. Theme Song: "Aerosol of my Love" Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 4.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/

It's the second episode, in which a series starts to find its footing but "Moonlighting" can't decide which way to go with David Addison. We also have a special guest appearance by a young Tim Robbins (in the episode, not our podcast, because we have neither the necessary blackmail pull nor time machine) and the greatest hospital chase to ever take place in a middle school. So grab a fistful of red M&Ms and get ready to play "Turbo" with Kevin and Ces! Theme Song: "Aerosol of my Love" Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 4.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/

On the pilot episode of "Moonies Never Say Die Hard!" hosts Kevin and Ces discuss the pilot episode of "Moonlighting," a remarkable case of narrative symmetry that just goes to show you're in capable hands. You'll also learn about 80s automobiles, 80s computer research, 40s smuggling, and the 80s TV take on what it really meant to be punk.Theme Song: "Aerosol of my Love" Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 4.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/