Have you ever gone to bed exhausted…not because of everything you did, but because of everything you had to think about?The appointments. The groceries. The school forms. The family calendar. The birthday gifts. The emotional health of the kids. Planning ahead. Remembering the little things. Worrying about the big things.Research suggests that many wives carry a larger share of the invisible mental and emotional load of family life. In this episode of Marriage Is a Joke, Elaine and Abe dive into why that happens, how it affects marriages, and why this conversation matters.This isn’t an episode about blaming husbands or keeping score. It’s about understanding each other better.Abe shares an important perspective, too: sometimes wives are carrying responsibilities they don’t actually have to carry. Together, we talk about how couples can have honest conversations about expectations, recognize the invisible work that’s happening behind the scenes, and find healthier ways to share the load.If you’ve ever felt mentally exhausted and wondered, “Why am I thinking about everything?”—you’re not alone.Join us as we unpack the research, share plenty of laughs, introduce our favorite “clipboard” metaphor, and offer practical ideas to help couples become better teammates instead of opponents.🎧 Listen wherever you get your podcasts, and if this episode resonates with you, share it with your spouse or someone you love.Become a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/marriage-is-a-joke--5661497/support.🎧 Marriage is a Joke PodcastReal talk. Real marriage. No filters.Where humor meets hard truths—and love shows up even when life gets messy.If this episode resonated with you, don't just listen… be part of it.💙 Join our Supporters ClubGet exclusive content, behind-the-scenes moments, deeper conversations, and help us keep this podcast going strong.👉 Join now and support real conversations about real marriage.📲 Stay connected with us:Instagram: @marriage.isajokeInstagram (Therapy & Counseling): @shcounselingFacebook: facebook.com/shcounseling❤️ Because marriage isn't always perfect……but it's always worth showing up for.

What is it about vacations that can turn loving couples into exhausted enemies in matching T-shirts?In this episode of Marriage is a Joke, we unpack why travel can bring out the BEST… and WORST… in marriage. From airport stress and different vacation expectations to overstimulation, spending tension, and “vacation versions” of ourselves showing up, we’re talking about the real reasons couples fight on trips.We also share one of OUR vacation fights at Disneyland. 😅In this episode:✈️ Why vacations amplify stress and attachment needs🎢 Planner vs spontaneous spouse dynamics🧠 The “parts” of us that show up while traveling (IFS style)❤️ How a reset tool can save a trip☀️ Questions couples SHOULD ask before vacation😂 And why sometimes all your marriage really needs is snacks and electrolytesBecause honestly…A vacation doesn’t create problems. It reveals and amplifies them.The goal isn’t a perfect trip.It’s learning how to stay connected inside the stress.Become a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/marriage-is-a-joke--5661497/support.🎧 Marriage is a Joke PodcastReal talk. Real marriage. No filters.Where humor meets hard truths—and love shows up even when life gets messy.If this episode resonated with you, don't just listen… be part of it.💙 Join our Supporters ClubGet exclusive content, behind-the-scenes moments, deeper conversations, and help us keep this podcast going strong.👉 Join now and support real conversations about real marriage.📲 Stay connected with us:Instagram: @marriage.isajokeInstagram (Therapy & Counseling): @shcounselingFacebook: facebook.com/shcounseling❤️ Because marriage isn't always perfect……but it's always worth showing up for.

❤️💙Life hit us hard.We almost lost a parent and everything else just paused.The podcast. Our routines. Even parts of how we normally show up for each other.And it made us ask something real:What actually happens to a marriage when life falls apart?Do you pull away…Keep score…Feel disconnected…Or do you lean in…even when you’re exhausted?In this episode, we talk about:❤️ 💙What this season looked like for us❤️ 💙How we supported each other when things felt uneven❤️ 💙The difference between codependence, independence, and healthy interdependence ❤️ 💙Why strong marriages aren’t always 50/50Because the truth is…the strength of your marriage shows up most when life is the hardest.🎧 Episode #18 is live👉 Link in bioBecome a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/marriage-is-a-joke--5661497/support.🎧 Marriage is a Joke PodcastReal talk. Real marriage. No filters.Where humor meets hard truths—and love shows up even when life gets messy.If this episode resonated with you, don't just listen… be part of it.💙 Join our Supporters ClubGet exclusive content, behind-the-scenes moments, deeper conversations, and help us keep this podcast going strong.👉 Join now and support real conversations about real marriage.📲 Stay connected with us:Instagram: @marriage.isajokeInstagram (Therapy & Counseling): @shcounselingFacebook: facebook.com/shcounseling❤️ Because marriage isn't always perfect……but it's always worth showing up for.

Join Abe and Elaine this Christmas as we give mistletoe a deeper meaning than just holiday décor.Historically, mistletoe stayed green when everything around it died back in winter, which made it a symbol of hope, renewal, and connection. Over time it became a reminder to pause, soften, share a kiss, and come close.This year we’re practicing mistletoe moments! ❤️ Tiny Pauses throughout the season where we stop long enough to really see each other.Not long talks.Not perfectly curated dates.Just intentional connection that quietly says:💚 You matter💚 I still choose you💚 I see you💚 I’m hereSome moments will be sugar …soft compliments, gratitude pauses, a quiet hold by the glow of the tree, a prayer before bed.Some moments will be spice…..a sprig hung over the bed, a slow kiss, playful flirtation, a little warmth that reminds us we’re not just teammates but lovers too.Because marriage isn’t only strengthened by huge gestures, it flourishes in the gentle, repeated moments of closeness.This season, let mistletoe prompt you to slow down, kiss, laugh, pray, flirt, breathe, and come close again.❤️🎄Become a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/marriage-is-a-joke--5661497/support.🎧 Marriage is a Joke PodcastReal talk. Real marriage. No filters.Where humor meets hard truths—and love shows up even when life gets messy.If this episode resonated with you, don't just listen… be part of it.💙 Join our Supporters ClubGet exclusive content, behind-the-scenes moments, deeper conversations, and help us keep this podcast going strong.👉 Join now and support real conversations about real marriage.📲 Stay connected with us:Instagram: @marriage.isajokeInstagram (Therapy & Counseling): @shcounselingFacebook: facebook.com/shcounseling❤️ Because marriage isn't always perfect……but it's always worth showing up for.

Join Abe and Elaine as they dive into Gottman’s final principle for making marriage work: Shared Meaning. This episode explores what your marriage stands for ….beyond chores, communication, or conflict.They’ll talk about how every couple needs to define the philosophy of their marriage: • What do we value? • What traditions matter to us? • How do we see parenting, politics, faith, or family roles? • What are the small daily rituals that make us “us”?From tiny moments like Sunday morning routines to the big beliefs that guide your life, shared meaning is what turns a relationship into a legacy.Tune in as Abe and Elaine unpack how couples can discover, define, and intentionally build their shared story…together.Become a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/marriage-is-a-joke--5661497/support.🎧 Marriage is a Joke PodcastReal talk. Real marriage. No filters.Where humor meets hard truths—and love shows up even when life gets messy.If this episode resonated with you, don't just listen… be part of it.💙 Join our Supporters ClubGet exclusive content, behind-the-scenes moments, deeper conversations, and help us keep this podcast going strong.👉 Join now and support real conversations about real marriage.📲 Stay connected with us:Instagram: @marriage.isajokeInstagram (Therapy & Counseling): @shcounselingFacebook: facebook.com/shcounseling❤️ Because marriage isn't always perfect……but it's always worth showing up for.

💙❤️Tired of having the SAME fight over and over again?? Tune in as Abe and Elaine discuss gridlock issues. This episode covers: 🎯 Why 69% of conflicts in marriage are perpetual🎯 How to uncover the dreams hiding under the drama🎯 The 4 Gottman steps to get unstuck (without selling your soul to the thermostat war)🎯 A real-life example from one couple Whether it’s in-laws, money, chores, or Christmas plans, you can move from stuck to connected and compromise… even if you never totally agree.🎧 Listen now and find out how to turn “we’ll never agree” into “we actually understand each other.”Become a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/marriage-is-a-joke--5661497/support.🎧 Marriage is a Joke PodcastReal talk. Real marriage. No filters.Where humor meets hard truths—and love shows up even when life gets messy.If this episode resonated with you, don't just listen… be part of it.💙 Join our Supporters ClubGet exclusive content, behind-the-scenes moments, deeper conversations, and help us keep this podcast going strong.👉 Join now and support real conversations about real marriage.📲 Stay connected with us:Instagram: @marriage.isajokeInstagram (Therapy & Counseling): @shcounselingFacebook: facebook.com/shcounseling❤️ Because marriage isn't always perfect……but it's always worth showing up for.

Join Abe and Elaine as they discuss emotional responsiveness in marriage. Sue Johnson, founder of EFT, found in her research that behind the tears in all marital conflict is the question we all yearn to know. ARE YOU THERE FOR ME? (A.R.E) Essentially we are all asking are you A- accessible, R- responsive, and E- engaged in this marriage or relationship? Of course Elaine and Abe put some fun spins on this. Join them for some laughs on the difference of men and women too. Go to instagram.com/marriage.isajoke and dm Elaine your email if you want the handout mentioned. Video mentioned called “It’s Not About the Nail”https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=-4EDhdAHrOgBecome a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/marriage-is-a-joke--5661497/support.🎧 Marriage is a Joke PodcastReal talk. Real marriage. No filters.Where humor meets hard truths—and love shows up even when life gets messy.If this episode resonated with you, don't just listen… be part of it.💙 Join our Supporters ClubGet exclusive content, behind-the-scenes moments, deeper conversations, and help us keep this podcast going strong.👉 Join now and support real conversations about real marriage.📲 Stay connected with us:Instagram: @marriage.isajokeInstagram (Therapy & Counseling): @shcounselingFacebook: facebook.com/shcounseling❤️ Because marriage isn't always perfect……but it's always worth showing up for.

Join Abe and Elaine as they discuss Gottman’s Principle #5 called “Solving Your Solvable Problems.” Conflict in marriage is inevitable! Thriving couples still have conflict. The Gottman research team has found that couples tend to have both Solvable and Gridlock problems. In this episode, Abe and Elaine go over the Gottman’s top tips of how to solve these solvable problems. Elaine and Abe are honest about how they too struggle with some dynamics in their own conflict. Stay tuned for our next episode where they go over how to get through the gridlock problems in principle #6! Become a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/marriage-is-a-joke--5661497/support.🎧 Marriage is a Joke PodcastReal talk. Real marriage. No filters.Where humor meets hard truths—and love shows up even when life gets messy.If this episode resonated with you, don't just listen… be part of it.💙 Join our Supporters ClubGet exclusive content, behind-the-scenes moments, deeper conversations, and help us keep this podcast going strong.👉 Join now and support real conversations about real marriage.📲 Stay connected with us:Instagram: @marriage.isajokeInstagram (Therapy & Counseling): @shcounselingFacebook: facebook.com/shcounseling❤️ Because marriage isn't always perfect……but it's always worth showing up for.

Join Abe and Elaine as they discuss an interesting (but a little weird ) study about tears. 😢😢How crying becomes a natural way to slow down the intensity and anger in marital conflict. Link to check out the study: https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/sniffing-womens-tears-makes-men-less-aggressive/ (https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/sniffing-womens-tears-makes-men-less-aggressive/)Become a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/marriage-is-a-joke--5661497/support.🎧 Marriage is a Joke PodcastReal talk. Real marriage. No filters.Where humor meets hard truths—and love shows up even when life gets messy.If this episode resonated with you, don't just listen… be part of it.💙 Join our Supporters ClubGet exclusive content, behind-the-scenes moments, deeper conversations, and help us keep this podcast going strong.👉 Join now and support real conversations about real marriage.📲 Stay connected with us:Instagram: @marriage.isajokeInstagram (Therapy & Counseling): @shcounselingFacebook: facebook.com/shcounseling❤️ Because marriage isn't always perfect……but it's always worth showing up for.

Join Abe and Elaine as they discuss this awesome principle from the Gottman research! We never want to control each other in marriage. This creates a parent- child like relationship. However, our feelings and thoughts should INFLUENCE our partner’s decisions. Warning for Wives: Sadly, to Elaine’s chagrin …this episode led to Abe’s visions of buying a motorcycle!Become a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/marriage-is-a-joke--5661497/support.🎧 Marriage is a Joke PodcastReal talk. Real marriage. No filters.Where humor meets hard truths—and love shows up even when life gets messy.If this episode resonated with you, don't just listen… be part of it.💙 Join our Supporters ClubGet exclusive content, behind-the-scenes moments, deeper conversations, and help us keep this podcast going strong.👉 Join now and support real conversations about real marriage.📲 Stay connected with us:Instagram: @marriage.isajokeInstagram (Therapy & Counseling): @shcounselingFacebook: facebook.com/shcounseling❤️ Because marriage isn't always perfect……but it's always worth showing up for.