Malt Couture
Malt Couture
DontDrinkBeer
After 7 years of being anonymous, 1.5 million words written about beer, and preaching the gospel of Barleywine is Life, Don't Drink Beer's Alex Kidd gets into the deep, dark world of podcasting. Joining him are his co-hosts, comedy writers and performers Stephen Loh and Michael Gabriel. Together they explore the absurd underbelly of the craft beer world while also discussing movies, music, video games, pop culture, and their sad, basement dwelling lives.
Batch 239: The Whole Gang is All Back Together!
Michael returns to Malt Couture. That's good! Then Alex finds out he has cancer. That's bad. But you can support Alex through the links below. That's good! The Beer News features a story about Founder's second racial discrimination lawsuit. That's bad. But in Wisconsin, they're updating old dumb beer laws. That's good! To allow children to serve alcohol to adults.......... (That's bad.) Can we go listen to the episode now?  Thanks to Moonlight Brewing Co. for sponsoring this episode! Follow them on Instagram @MoonlightBrewing! Use code DDB15 for 15% off your order.  There are several ways to help support Alex Kidd and his family during his battle with cancer: You can donate to his GoFundMe. Thanks Tom Maugeri for setting that up. If brewers want to get involved there is a "LIFE" Internation Barleywine Collab that Drew Pool of Wren House is putting together. You can click the link to get all the updates about the collab and shared recipe.  For more info about colon cancer and to help support the fight against it check out the Colon Cancer Foundation.   
May 18, 2023
2 hr 16 min
Batch 238: One GigaBier, Please!
Tesla releases GigaBier, a pilsner inspired by the Cybertruck, that honors the traditions of Reinheitsgebot beer brewing and uses Cyberhops and features a glow-in-the-dark watermark! The Malty Boyz™ have gone ahead and offered $1000 to anyone who can send them a bottle. Also in the Beer News, Belgian officials destroy Miller High Life for calling themselves the "Champagne of Beer" and dusty shelf turds brewed 86 years ago for Edward VIII's coronation go on sale. In the BottleShare, Stephen breaks the zombie curse when he brings on Zombie Ice from 3 Floyd's.  Thanks to Masthead Brewing Company for sponsoring this episode! Follow them on Instagram @MastheadBrewing! Head to our Patreon for weekly exclusive content. Get the Malt Couture Officially Licensed T-shirt. Follow DontDrinkBeer on Instagram and Twitter.
May 4, 2023
1 hr 50 min
Batch 237: The 4th Annual 420 Episode: Mead Edition
It's that time of year again when the The Malty Boyz™ celebrate the coolest holiday: 4/20! This year Stephen's indulging his sweet tooth and assumbled a collection of mead from four mead producers never before featured on the podcast. Scrolling through Mazer Cup and homebrewing compeititon results, Stephen reached out to Matthew Mead, The Meredery, Klausing Mead, and Williamson Mead and Brewing to see what these highly decorated mead producers are all about and what their commercial ambitions mean for mead fans. In the Beer News, Alex and Stephen do a deep dive into the Bud-lash from the right wing community after Bud Light endorsed a transgender spokesperson.  Thanks to Highland Park Brewing for sponsoring this episode! Follow them on Instagram @HighlandParkBrewery! Head to our Patreon for weekly exclusive content. Get the Malt Couture Officially Licensed T-shirt. Follow DontDrinkBeer on Instagram and Twitter.
Apr 20, 2023
1 hr 50 min
Batch 236: The Hop Water Era Has Begun
While The Malty Boyz™ are no stranger to hop water it looks like this delicious non-alcoholic beverage is trending towards becoming a new staple in the craft brewing world. Alex and Stephen crack open Hop Water from Noon Whistle and taste the new frontier of NA drinks. In the Beer News, the old Hair of the Dog facility has found a new owner, New Belgium expands by taking over the old Ballast Point facility in Virginia, a German brewery is now making powdered beer, and White Claw launches it's own vodka.  Thanks to Untitled Art for sponsoring this episode! Follow them on Instagram @UntitledArtBev! Head to our Patreon for weekly exclusive content. Get the Malt Couture Officially Licensed T-shirt. Follow DontDrinkBeer on Instagram and Twitter.
Apr 6, 2023
1 hr 45 min
Batch 235: 100% Beer, 0% Podcast
It's a double dose of non-barrel aged barleywine when Alex brings in Life from Breakside Brewing and Stephen finds a dusty Canadian classic lurking among the shelves. Alex also brings in a pastry stout from Tennessee that has the Malty Boyz™ chasing waterfalls. In the Beer News, Lost Abbey takes a step back to reevaluate their business model, a head brewer starts an OnlyFans to boost her income, and Bud Light Seltzer has to dig itself out of a hole it dug itself into and steps on many rakes along the way.  Thanks to Revolution Brewing for sponsoring this episode! Follow them on Instagram @RevBrew! Be on the lookout for Infinity-Hero, a next-gen dry hop including Nectaron, Strata, HBC #586, and HBC #1019 provides a glimpse into the future of hop innovation. Head to our Patreon for weekly exclusive content. Get the Malt Couture Officially Licensed T-shirt. Follow DontDrinkBeer on Instagram and Twitter.
Mar 23, 2023
1 hr 48 min
Batch 234: Don't Be Like Water
Don't be like water making its way onto endcaps. Do be assertive, but adjust to the customer's preferences, and you shall find a way onto shelves and into tap lines. If nothing within you stays hazy, outward things will disclose themselves to be bottom fermented. Empty your mind, be untradeable. Overabundant, like water (unless you live in California then, please, conserve water). If you put water into a cup, it becomes a marketing campaign that you get sued by AB InBev for. You put a barrel-aged stout into a bottle and it becomes a bottle that you can flip for expensive expedition gear. You put it in a teapot, well now you have beer in a teapot and that's weird. Now, beer can flow or it can sit in your linen closet until it's past it's prime and no one cares anymore except for people like Alex. Don't be like water, my friend, and drink your beer.  Head to our Patreon for weekly exclusive content. Get the Malt Couture Officially Licensed T-shirt. Follow DontDrinkBeer on Instagram and Twitter.
Mar 9, 2023
1 hr 52 min
Batch 233: Just 2 Sweet!
It's Alex and Stephen for the next couple months and this episode starts off with a callback to the "spritz tasting" Patreon episode before Alex brings in some heavy hitting bourbon and Stephen finds yet another dusty shelf turd. In the Beer News, the executive director of the Oregon Liquor and Cannabis Commission reveals himself to be a total bourbon shitlord, Westvleteren adds a label to their bottle, and Budwieser doesn't include horses in their commercial for the big game. Stephen also test's Alex's friendship with Michael. Thanks to Human Robot Brewery for sponsoring this episode! Follow them on Instagram @HumanRobotBeer!  Head to our Patreon for weekly exclusive content. Get the Malt Couture Officially Licensed T-shirt. Follow DontDrinkBeer on Instagram and Twitter.
Feb 23, 2023
2 hr 4 min
Batch 232: And Then There Were 13 Trappist Breweries
Achel loses it's trappist title after the last monks depart from the abbey. The Malty Boyz™ do make one last ditch effort to entice a monk to stay but may have made the situation worse. In more Beer News, a beer spa opens up in Denver and the Boyz wonder who it's for after looking into the spa treatment packages and Hormel Foods teams up with Modist Brewing to make a chili cheese beer must to Stephen's delight. Närke makes it's first appearance back on the podcast having last been drank at The Spider Den. The Bottleshare features beers from Finback, Utica Club, and Off Color. Michael eats glue. Head to our Patreon for weekly exclusive content. Get the Malt Couture Officially Licensed T-shirt. Follow DontDrinkBeer on Instagram and Twitter.
Feb 9, 2023
1 hr 41 min
Batch 231: Batch 1 Was Better
The podcast has come around full circle as the 2017 Straight Jacket Barleywine from Revolution Brewing Co. was the very first beer ever featured on Malt Couture. 230 batches later, Stephen brings in the 2022 Straight Jacket and makes a bold claim. Alex brings in some rare Canada juice from Temporal Artisan Ales. Michael's living on Ohio time and is up past his bedtime. In the Beer News, New Belgium revamps it's flagship Fat Tire recipe and branding and a Philadephia brewery bans children in the taproom. Thanks to Amorys Tomb Brewing Co. for sponsoring this episode! Follow them on Instagram @AmorysTomb! Use code MALTY5 to get 5% off when you join their Dead Sparrow Society. Head to our Patreon for weekly exclusive content. Get the Malt Couture Officially Licensed T-shirt. Follow DontDrinkBeer on Instagram and Twitter.
Jan 26, 2023
1 hr 55 min
Batch 230: New Year, Same Ol' Malty Boyz™ (unforch)
The Malty Boyz™ kick off 2023 drinking a crispy collab from Humble Sea Brewing Co. and Firestone Walker and recap what they did to ring in the new year. In the Beer News, Cantillon ages bottles of beer at the bottom of the ocean, the Boyz react to Untappd's Best Beers of 2022 lists, and Stephen doesn't understand metric conversion for temperature. Michael reports live from Ohio. For the Bottleshare Alex brings in a Maplewood's Barrel Aged Cinammon Double Coconut Cuppa. Head to our Patreon for weekly exclusive content. Get the Malt Couture Officially Licensed T-shirt. Follow Alex on Instagram and Twitter.
Jan 12, 2023
1 hr 57 min
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