Tom Lucy is the kind of guy one finds impossible to dislike. He’s kind, charming, FUNNY, engaging, and has two first names. He has a solid group of friends, a loving family, and has a good head on his shoulders. He’s career-oriented. A thinker. Driven. He’s 23. The first time we met, we began our conversation by examining our mutual, ten year separated, existential crises. Our second encounter was at a birthday dinner where I watched him concoct a last-minute birthday speech, which was perfectly (and comedically) executed. The third time we sat across one another and I badgered the poor guy for an hour on comedy and the inner-workings of his field, which led us to discuss the potential of sitting down to record the very podcast you’re about to hear. He said yes. I followed up…and, here we are. We spoke of all the things I like best: Vulnerability, Work Ethic, Family Dynamics, Relationship’s pitfalls and joys, and Wake Up calls. For 23, the dude has a lot to share without an ounce of judgement or righteousness. I’ll let you decide for yourself. Oh, and don’t bother calling him Tom. It’s Tom Lucy.
Mar 9, 2020
1 hr 29 min
32. IGOR LARIONOV II | On Accepting the Journey, Turning Negatives into Positives + Carrying his Last Name
Igor is my brother. He is a professional athlete. An ice hockey player to be exact. He is 21 years old and currently finds himself in a stage of change and transition. Except, unlike most of us (myself included), Igor is prepared for the Unknown. In fact, he’s excited for it, seeing it as an opportunity to create something special. He is not a wallower, not a stagnant force of nature complacent in the cards he’s been dealt — difficult ones including injuries and setbacks which have made his climb to the top that more difficult. He knows he is, and forever will be, the “Son of Igor Larionov’, but he doesn’t let the negative talk around some of his perceived privileges get in the way of where he’s heading. What I didn’t know is that he is an eternal optimist, that he finds the silver-lining in situations unlikely to have a silver-lining at all. He is curious about the journey, not the destination. And he praises kindness above all. Am I biased? Yes. But, pleasantly surprised in the amount I learned from this young, brother of mine. He has much wisdom to share for a 21-year-old — lessons, stories, and takeaways applicable for athletes, parents of athletes and people in general striving for greatness.
Mar 1, 2020
1 hr 14 min
The only thing you need to know is that we’re back (kind of) from our time away, and that Season Two of ‘IN THE UNKNOWN’ is available for your listening pleasure.
Mar 1, 2020
Let me start by saying: I love this being. She as an individual. She as an artist. She as a soul. She as a friend. Although, as you’ll hear in the pod, our meetings in-person can be counted on one hand. That’s because when we’re connected with our intuition, it’s that much easier to spot a fellow like-minded soul. She is a Detroit-based artist - arguably speaking, one of our most celebrated artists. Detroit wears her with pride. Walking the streets, one can catch her bright colored shapes placed on our most visible mural, livening up the walls of our burgeoning business sector in our WeWork’s, and waving proudly in flagship stores like Lululemon. She also, adorns the walls of local Detroiters, whose passion for the city isn’t complete without an Ellen Rutt piece. She’s also frickin cool — and approachable. She’s a friend of a friend of a friend and always willing to strike up a conversation, leaving the listener on the other side slightly changed from the encounter. Visibly, she is bright — like her art, and her smile smiles wider than yours. Simply put: you can’t miss her, and you shouldn’t. in this episode, Ellen bares all on her personal unknowns (see below), opening up on her battle with alcohol, the at times wildly loud inner-critic, and how she plans on bravely facing the road ahead in this next chapter of a nomadic lifestyle. Her trick? Listening. A tool she deeply developed whilst going into the woods. My personal favorite part? When she divulges on art-making. It is as lusciously sounding as love-making. There is an art form to the art-making. A trusting in one’s body, one movement after the next. A response, instead of a reaction. Mmmm.. it’s good to add to your toolbox, whether you’re looking to make art, make love, or to make the next best decision. Listen, take notes, and if you need further inspiration, find Ellen’s art. It will speak in the very same sing-songy whispers her voice speaks in. Ellen - you’re a frickin’ star. Thank you for this.
Dec 27, 2018
1 hr 25 min
Andrew Kippen came into my life at just the opportune moment in time. I was in the middle of my New York stint in the summer of 2018, trying to figure out why all things that were easy in the past suddenly felt like a mountain I was never going to climb. The keyword you should be paying attention to here is: trying. Trying, aka, going against the energy of the Universe, which as I’ve learned and continue to learn, never gets us anywhere. In fact, it only gets us further from our Truth. Andrew’s name came up during a conversation with an acquaintance to whom I revealed that I was internally struggling with the world in which I was living. There were doors being closed and body ailments which prevented me from doing the work, along with other difficulties, to which my acquaintance said: call Andrew. So I did and we scheduled my very first hypnotherapy session. I will confess. I am not one to fear experiences especially as they pertain to the opening of the mind, heart and soul. However, hypnotherapy was as foreign as it comes and I was a bit apprehensive upon my arrival. Perhaps, looking back, not so much on the process itself, but what it was I was about to learn. You might be asking: which is what? The TRUTH, people! The Truth which sits inside all of us and yet we do everything in our power to avoid. Here’s where Andrew comes in. His uncanny ability to create a tangible stillness, calm, and safety in the room. His attention to detail as he listens, actively to the words streaming out of the subconscious. His playfulness and kindness, as he delves into crevices shut tightly by defense mechanisms built over the years. He’s gentle prodding and nudging without an ounce of judgement, force, or over-bearing control. With his skills he guides and leads to the Truth. Upon unveiling, he doesn’t sit back with arms-crossed in self-approval, instead stills his voice into an almost silence so as to openly welcome a deeply seeded wound. He is talented but also educated and also willing to say that what he knows today could change tomorrow. It is because of him that I am now sitting here in Moscow, Russia writing these very words. It was his guidance which opened up a pandora’s box of wishes and desires that I had long kept shut in the over-protective world I had created for myself as a means of survival. He nudged me into the unknown in the way that I nudge many. For that I am eternally grateful. I suggest you grab a piece of paper and a pen as you listen to his words in this podcast episode of In The Unknown. He is guidance. Period. And every word is filled with meaning. If you happen to sense yourself curious in exploring the world of hypnotherapy — jump! I promise you it will not disappoint. So, without further ado, here is my conversation with Andrew Kippen.
Dec 23, 2018
1 hr 22 min
HERE's the known. I first encountered Lauren Harkness at a beautiful space in Brooklyn, New York while in attendance for a Conscious Sexuality Workshop produced by the Goddess Institute. On brand with my personal workshops - IN THE UNKNOWN - I had no idea what to expect. I arrived open and willing to listen and to learn. I have always been skeptical of sexuality in the form it takes in a female’s body because I had to learn about through personal trial and error, and without much education and/or guidance. Sex had always been a controversial topic in my world. It was not talked about in my childhood and it wasn’t fully explored or understood in my young adulthood. It is only of recent in the process of me reclaiming my life, my spirit and my body that I’ve begun to fully understand the complexity of female sexuality. Conscious Sexuality, that is, being aware (and conscious) of what it means to be a sexual female. In the two hour workshop, I found myself deeply engaged with the stories women shared — even I raised my hand to tell my story. —but what truly piqued my interest was Lauren and her ability to lead, guide, and teach an exceptionally difficult subject matter and human experience, in the most comprehendible, non-judgmental, and seamless way. Within minutes of opening her mouth the room became a safe space. There was a total and tangible connectivity amidst a group of total strangers. On top of this connection, Lauren was able to articulate and heal our collective insecurities and fears in the world of female sexuality by normalizing that which hadn’t felt “normal” before, and backing it up with her experience and education. I walked out of there with my mind swirling. How did I define conscious sexuality? What did it mean to me? What was the difference between seduction and sexuality? What is intimacy? What kind of partner do I want and what kind of partner do I want to be? Am I looking for monogamy or polyamory? And what if my mind changes? How do I step out of numbness to feeling? And how do I stand in my sexual power without it being stripped, abused, manipulated or taken away from me? These are all the questions that I pondered while I waited for the day that I could sit in conversation with Lauren. After all, this is done IN THE UNKNOWN, and so I was not able to research and formulate any predispositions. I wanted to be wholly and fully present in whatever it was that surfaced in our time together. Luckily for me, all of these questions came up and Lauren answered them so beautifully, gently, and full of wisdom. You’ll learn a lot about conscious sexuality, intimacy (both personal and interpersonal), sexual energy, communication in relationship, female empowerment, re-wiring our societal and primal desires and needs. We touch on the controversy and missed opportunities within the #metoo movement. And most importantly, we talk about the unknown’s within Lauren’s world which she ties neatly together to her own definition of what it means to be a conscious (sexual) female. This one’s a must-listen.
Oct 23, 2018
1 hr 12 min
27. DAN DOTY | On EQ, Finding Oneself + One’s Purpose, the Physics of Human Connection + Building EVRYMAN
This connection is another one of those timing is everything and patience is a virtue. I first heard of Dan Doty indirectly via (once again) Jesse Israel, when mentioning a men’s retreat he’d attended called EVRYMAN. At first, I was connected to it’s co-founder, Sascha Lewis, with whom I met in person last fall. I made a note in my notebook that I’d like to continue this conversation with a potential collaboration in mind. Almost a year later, I attended a MediClub in Brooklyn. There I was grouped with four strangers to discuss a prompted topic. I exchanged contacts with one of the men after the event. We met for coffee. He mentioned EVRYMAN and suggested I connect with the Founder. An email was sent and a week later I was on a call with Dan Doty. We had things in common. Dan used to work as a producer, as had I. He had a love for Montana, as did I from my work there with VICE. But mostly we connected on the human condition and the need for the type of connection and conversation that he was providing for men. He expanded on EVRYMAN and what the retreat entails. He spoke of the men he was meeting. He made mention that he was looking to work with women as well. I knew then that this was my people. That was conversation #1. After a few weeks processing our conversation, I sent a follow up email asking Dan if he’d be interested in a podcast conversation. He immediately said yes. We set up a time and here’s the result of this timeline of events. The truth of the matter is this (as it always is): timing is everything. When Jesse first mentioned EVRYMAN, I had just started my IN THE UNKNOWN Workshops. I was not yet ready to properly comprehend and process the context of this podcast because I hadn’t yet done the work with others. Now, with nearly 60 Workshops under my belt, I had the experience and the hours to pull from my personal experiences in workshop, and to use my own personal journey as an example to relate. The patience it takes to get to this place is immense, however, when we exercise it and trust the process of time, we do not miss the connection when it arises, even if it comes months later. What I know is that Dan is a Warrior, someone on a journey to create space for all to reconnect with self and others. His approach is a bit different than mine and this could be due to his stronger foundation of self-confidence. That said, he too fears common Unknowns to mine, and articulates them most vulnerably with an immense strength, kindness and compassion. This is a listen for EVRYMAN looking to change their life. For every woman looking to better understand her man. And for anyone looking for self-betterment and a new way to live their life. I suggest STRONGLY that if you like what you hear you share: men, attend this retreat // women, suggest it to your men. This is a win for all. Thank you Dan for your heart + your mind. Friend (you know who you are) for the connect. And J for the planting of the seed.
Oct 7, 2018
1 hr 18 min
26. SHAUNDA BROWN | On Conscious Sexuality, Spiritual Partners, Breaking Inner Blocks + Goddess Institute
HERE'S THE KNOWN. I was introduced to Shaunda Brown via email by Jesse Israel. He suggested we meet, record a podcast, or at the very least attend each other’s workshops. Somewhere within the message, there was probably a hidden (intentional) current for friendship but it did not need to be said. It just happened. After a few email exchanges, I attended Shaunda’s first Goddess Institute event on Conscious Sexuality. Goddess is her baby. It’s the thing she’s been manifesting, growing and birthing. I walked into a transformed space in Brooklyn, NY and took my seat on a fuzzy pillow smack dab in the middle. There was a microphone. A speaker (future pod guest - Lauren Harkness) and room full of ready-to-learn women. Shaunda spoke first. A few things immediately resonated. Work and the need to be busy, to do, and to prove one’s worth in a male-dominated industry. Injury and the overriding of one’s bodies message. “Don’t do this,” spoke Shaunda as she prepared herself to do a snowboarding trick she wasn’t equipped to do. Shortly after that, she separated her shoulder but pushed through - because that’s what we do - and ended up having more damage done than the original injury. Slooow down it screamed. It being the Universe, God, Spirit, and Body. Lastly, I was mesmerized by Shaunda’s ability to create a “safe” space for women to access their vulnerability, their wounds, their fears, and more importantly, their desires by using conscious sexuality as a healing mechanism. This language and her ability to weave the message into those around her is innately her gift. She cultivates the very meaning of “speak your truth” on a subject that so many still find taboo. If you don’t know who she is or have yet to hear of Goddess Institute — don’t worry…we’ll all know about it very soon. She is leading the charge to change the way we view sexuality in the mainstream and in modern times. It’s not a specific message that one needs to follow. It’s only specific to you. But to access that message, one must be willing to Show Up and to do the work of finding one’s Truth. It is the willingness that she is waiting on - not wasting time for the time’s to change as she is actively already in motion. When I sat down with her prior to this pod interview, I had asked her about her future goals and what she hopes for Goddess Institute. It was her desire to make it accessible for both men and women that truly solidified that this was "my person. She, like me, is inclusive and about the people. She, like me, isn’t using foreign concepts or language to change people’s minds. She, like me, is creating safe spaces for people to collectively move through things, getting them to the other side of wherever that may be for each individual. She, like me, is opening hearts and minds without force or a specific destination. Soul Sister — that’s as much as I knew coming into this conversation. The rest? The new partner-in-awesome relationship, her stories about Mom and Dad, her lessons-learned, her knowledge on conscious sexuality, her desires for her personal journey, and the details on Goddess Institute…well, that all showed up because we decided to Show Up for one another in conversation. Enjoy. xx HERE’S SHAUNDA’S UNKNOWN(S). I’m constantly learning every moment to trust myself more and to be in the state of flow. I’ve said that my life - since I’ve been very attentive and aware of how much the universe works for us - of just trusting that flow. I call it en Fuego where it just catches on fire. This happens and then it opens another door that had never had even been something that I could conceptualize in my tiny human mind. Trusting the unknown to unfold. This whole path with Goddess Institute. Had you asked me a year ago if this is where I would be in my life. That would have never been a spec of what the possibility was. There are so many unknowns with what magic can be created with goddess institute that I am so excited and passionate to understand more of. Personally, just starting this new relationship with my partner in awesome. It was so unknown to me previously about how that aspect would work in my life, and it was one of my big goals when I was mentalizing things to call in…that life partner, or whatever we want to call it. I’ve never known something so much as I know this aspect of just totally trusting. I have no idea how it’s going to look in that iteration. So that’s a big unknown for me because it’s so new. Just totally surrendering in this way is completely beautiful and having trust in whatever outcome that would be.
Sep 22, 2018
1 hr 25 min
Like a true Woman, Mother and Birther, in a strange way, Paula birthed + mothered me into the Woman that I am today, She provided just enough wisdom, trust and a push forward (without helicoptering, micro-managing or reeling me back in for a check-in) to set the stage for my personal and professional rebirth. First came this powerful podcast conversation. Then came my experience of her New Moon Circle at WMN SPACE in Los Angeles. Both left impactful changes in my ways of thinking, moving and BEing. What she does well — perhaps better than most — is seed and then watch the world (or person) grow. If we’re to use labels, Paula is a Mother, a Wife, a Doula, a Spiritual Counselor, a Facilitator of Women Circles and the Founder of WMN SPACE. More than that and labels aside she is a perpetual seeker, learner, observer, gatherer, and teacher moving through this world so gracefully that even the most clumsy passerby eases into a more ethereal way of movement once in her presence. When I met Paula in person, I waited until the Women’s Circle she was hosting had completed. I wanted to see her for her and I wanted her to see me for me, and not as a guest of Paula Mallis because I had recorded a podcast with her. That was, in hindsight, my own personal insecurity. A full year later, I can see that the definition of “hashtag goals” is the unperturbed spirit and aura that is Paula Mallis. She doesn’t see labels, or conditions, or flesh…she sees Souls. When speaking to her Paula’s eyes locked with mine. She peered within me, seeing through me, into me. She has the ability to disarm whomever’s in front of her immediately providing a sense of a safe space through her kindness and unconditional love. She is one of a kind. A treasure. In this conversation you’ll hear Paula speak bravely and openly on a myriad of topics stemming from feminism, to women as birthers, to acting as a Doula, to her intentions with WMN SPACE, to self-love and self-care, to sex and pregnancy education, to miscarriage and difficult pregnancies, to men meeting us half way, and filling up our own cup. It’s an episode that needs to be listened to over, and over, and over again. It’s an education for ALL women. I, for one, will have this on once a month from here on out as a reminder for the Woman that I know I can. That is the Power of Paula — she empowers every single Being.
Sep 12, 2018
Many of you send me dm's, emails + texts asking in depth questions about IN THE UNKNOWN and most of the things that I write about on my blog and instagram. I am always happy to answer, however, sometimes it becomes overwhelming because I simply do not have enough time to get to everyone. So, what I've decided to do is to add to my pod a series called 'A' where I do just that: answer your questions. For the first episode I fill you in on why I've changed the name of my business into IN THE UNKNOWN, I give you an insider's look into what happens IN THE UNKNOWN and why people continuously choose to show up for both the Workshops and the 1o1's. I also talk a lot about why it's important for us to choose to be IN THE UNKNOWN, what's to be gained in STAYING IN THE DISCOMFORT, and why we should TRUST THE PROCESS. At the end of this episode (and future ones) I'll always leave you with a small tidbit and/or pick me up. Take a listen. Share. And let me know what you think!
Aug 30, 2018