This episode is a continuation of last week's discussion about the necessity of evolving your parenting style as your child transitions between seasons. I brought in my own mom, Lisa Whelchel, to talk a bit about the her motherhood journey with us three kids over the years. In Part 1 we talked about toddlerhood through jr. high, while in this episode, Part 2, we explore high school through adulthood. The teen years can be a tricky time for both child/mom as they learn to navigate unchartered territory and new boundaries, but then after they become an adult another dramatic shift needs to take place in order to evolve together. Hint: It requires more & more autonomy until ultimately you aren’t “parenting” your adult child whatsoever.  --- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/haven-the-podcast/support

🚀 NEW SEASON LAUNCH 🚀Season 2 is all about relationships and my own Mom so graciously agreed to come and talk about the mother/child bond & evolution over time in our kick-off episode! The title of the episode is a bit tongue in cheek as I’m not sure how many will get that tongue in cheek reference, but my Mom, Lisa Whelchel, was on a show in the 80’s called The Facts of Life.  Yet, the reason I’m having her as a guest is because she is truly the person who has had the biggest impact on me out of anyone in my life. After a clip of me reading some feedback she gave me went viral and hit over a million views the comments were flooded by people curious what a healthy mother/adult daughter even looks like with request to hear more from her wisdom.  Season 2 will have more frequent content (mini-episodes dropped weekly!) and this ep is broken out into two parts and the final portion will be dropped next Mon! --- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/haven-the-podcast/support

Our culture says “be the main character of your own story” which I can understand and get the idea… But, I am the main character in only one movie - my own - and I’m a side character in everyone else’s. How can I make the most in my supporting role in other people’s lives?  Where I would see this most frequently is in my relationship to my kids - as their parents, we have to see them as the main characters and not just an extension of OUR story. Our lives. Our wishes for them. Etc.  I bring in a mom I’ve looked up to from afar whose 11 year old prospected me in the neighborhood with her babysitting resume. On the intro call she asked if my kids “had any allergies she needed to know about” and I was sold. I thought “who is this young female entrepreneur and also how did her mom do it?” So I took Lara Richardson to lunch. She is a badass professionally as the CMO of Hallmark Media (helloooo Hallmark Christmas movies have already started, yay!) but she took her role as a mother with just as much focus, intention, and leadership as she does her career.  We talk all things toddlerhood to pre-teen together! --- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/haven-the-podcast/support

Has your heart ever longed for something you couldn't quite reach? Whether you're held back by circumstance, talent, timing, capabilities, fate, or luck it doesn't really matter on the "why" when it comes to dealing with the disappointment. What do you do in the interim of an unmet desire? In my experience it can be hard to hold both truths at the same time: a lot of this is out of my control, but not all of it. My nature is to white knuckle something to force it into existence, but sometimes there are odds bigger than me that I can't quite budge. Maybe your nature is to "let go and let God" then subsequently abdicating any responsibility in the situation. How can we hold both equally? Not forcing our will into a situation but also not being entirely laissez faire to things we hope for. I bring in my friend Gaia as we talk a little bit about our own journeys with this topic and also how to support a friend if perhaps they are in this current season. --- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/haven-the-podcast/support

Do you have a sister and wonder if you're complicated relationship is "normal?" Or do you not have a sister and are curious if it really is all that it's hyped up to be? Inspired by my last episode where a childhood friend ratted me out (in a loving way) for complaining about my sister buying matching Ugg boots... I bring back my little sister as a guest to the show. We talk about how being born 13 months apart caused me to crave independence while she would have been happy to tag along to anything & everything I was doing. She also brings up the great point that there seems to be more of a competition element within the sister/sister dynamic more-so than a brother/sister dynamic. I will add the caveat that my Producer encouraged me to re-do the intro and warn people that we were a bit unhinged / all over the place in our storytelling - so just be prepared for the multiple story tangents we go on together down memory lane... --- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/haven-the-podcast/support

We all seem to have blind spots - areas we are weak in or aren’t able to accurately perceive ourselves. For me it can be as small scale as moving too quickly and incurring many typos (thank God for Grammarly!) or as large scale as being so focused in my perspective that I find it difficult to entertain alternative avenues.  There is the old saying “it takes two to know one” so oftentimes without family, friends or community who love us enough to speak hard truths and make us privy to them we likely would never be made aware of them.  So, since we all have them, how can we try to root out those blind spots in our lives? I dive into this concept of tactical and practical ways to understand yourself better with my childhood friend Emily Fullerton Hutchinson.    We then parlay the topic into how these can even morph into hidden vices if we are segregating (even subconsciously!) portions of ourselves out that are “unapproved” or “unwelcome” and “not allowed.”  Join us as we dive into Real Housewives, disassociation, weed gummies, and more! --- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/haven-the-podcast/support

Most of us grew up watching movies, but there was always one that you wanted on repeat. Have you ever wondered what drew you to that particular movie? For me growing up I loved “The Little Mermaid” and only looking back as adult can I see the common threads of what drew me to that story. Her independence, curiosity, exploration, rejection of the norm, and quest for adventure are all themes I was aligning with.  Ultimately, movies are storytelling - which has been around since the beginning of time. Stories tell us about ourselves and are how we process the human journey.  For this episode I bring in my friend Mackenzie (who also did the logo for my podcast - helloooo https://mackenzielauren.com/) and we hear a bit about her fav childhood movie, Halloween costume genres, and overall approach to her branding work. After you listen to the episode my question to you is - what did you love as a kid? And what were you trying to identify internally and also tell the world about yourself through that?  --- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/haven-the-podcast/support

The second part of our “Free Marriage Counseling” episode is live now and we cover… Money & Sex Yes, we do really go there.  💰 MONEY 💰 Have you ever thought about your earliest memory tied with money? What about your partner’s? Likely, they are very different experiences, but those early emotions tied with it play into your experiences and concept of it as a whole.  💋 SEX 💋 Also we share some practical tips for a healthy sex life: The “no with an appointment” strategy Don’t barter for sex (if you do the dishes, then I will XYZ… = dangerous)  Freedom to play when there are agreed upon parameters  I think my favorite part about this episode is that my husband drops the majority of the wisdom on these topics. Overall, we want you to have great marriages. I hope these conversations have spurred on helpful discussions with you and those you love! --- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/haven-the-podcast/support

The #1 topic request I’ve received on this podcast has been people asking for an episode discussing marriage. Committed long term relationships can be some of the most meaningful and most difficult things to navigate all at the same time.  I couldn’t do this theme solo so my guest is the LOML, Aaron Weits - my husband of nearly 11 years, lover for 16 years and best friend for 18 years. We both are currently tied on the # of weddings we have been asked to officiate and, because of that, it means we have facilitated pre-marital counseling for a half a dozen couples. We broke down our 3 month curriculum into the highest level concepts to discuss either prior to getting married or after you’ve already tied the knot.  This first episode is all about conflict, communication & expectations and I hope you find some value in it.  What do you do when you disagree?  What are some boundaries to have in place during conflict? How do you break out of a pattern of scorekeeping with one another?  Stay tuned for the second part of this “free marriage counseling” series which covers money & sex! --- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/haven-the-podcast/support

Do you remember the first time as a female you were objectified?  I do. I was 12 and he was in his early 20s. It brought up mixed feelings of being immediately uncomfortable and self-conscious, but also flattered by the attention? Whether it’s fielding unwanted advances, or running in a new city with pepper spray in hand, or being the solo female voice outnumbered in a leadership room - these instances aren’t unique.  Women reading even just those examples will go “oh yeah, been there.” But, for some reason to men it is still a foreign concept that we have different obstacles in this world than they may be facing.   I initially had the title of this theme “Women vs Men” but I realized I don’t think we are opposing forces.  A better thought is “how can we invite men into our experiences better?” Join me and my friend Janelle, a female entrepreneur who founded Volara, an artist management company working to create intentional spaces for females in the music industry, as we talk a bit about our own experiences navigating this world as modern women. If you’re a female, I think you’ll likely feel validated and less alone in your experience and if you’re a male I think you’ll walk away with some better handles and tools to support the females in your life.  --- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/haven-the-podcast/support