How do you actually initiate sex with your partner? It sounds simple, but for many couples, making the first move can be surprisingly awkward, vulnerable and even scary. In this episode, we get into why sexual initiation can become so difficult and what you can actually do about it. We discuss the loneliness epidemic and changing dating habits, before getting into the bigger question: how do we ask for sex without making it feel like a high-stakes negotiation? Drawing on ideas from Emily Nagoski's Come As You Are, we explore spontaneous and responsive desire, the "accelerators and brakes" that influence libido, and why initiating sex can start hours before you ever get into bed. We talk about: Why so many couples struggle to initiate sex How fear of rejection can make making a move feel terrifying Why sex can start with connection, safety and feeling understood Using love languages as a form of everyday intimacy and foreplay Spontaneous vs responsive desire How long-term relationships can change the way we experience sexual desire How having children can completely reshape your sex life Why asking your partner how they like to be initiated with could change everything How to communicate about sex without pressure, expectation or mind-reading And then we hit the watershed. The first half of this episode is available to everyone, but if you want to hear the more personal, intimate and unfiltered conversation - including our own stories about sexual initiation - you'll need to head over to Patreon for the full episode. So whether you've been together for ten years, you're newly dating, you're navigating parenthood, or you're simply wondering how to make the first move without dying of embarrassment… this one's for you. Follow us on Instagram: ⁠⁠@comecurious⁠⁠ and DM us your questions, stories and voicenotes! Follow Florence ⁠⁠@florencebark⁠⁠ Follow Reed ⁠⁠@reedamberx Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

No one really prepares you for what happens when your best friend has a baby. Suddenly your lives look completely different. Messages take longer to reply to, spontaneous plans disappear, priorities shift, and sometimes... it can feel like you're grieving a friendship that's still alive. In this deeply honest episode, Florence and Reed unpack how becoming a parent changes friendships—not just for the person having the baby, but for the friends left wondering where they fit in. We discuss: Why it's normal to grieve a friendship changing after parenthood Feeling left behind when your friends start families How to support a friend who's just had a baby What parents actually need from their child-free friends Navigating jealousy, loneliness and changing priorities Why friendships naturally have "seasons" Creating your own village—whether you have children or not How honest communication can save lifelong friendships Whether you're expecting your first baby, proudly child-free, undecided, or simply watching your friendship group evolve, this episode is for anyone trying to hold onto meaningful relationships through life's biggest transitions. Because growing up doesn't have to mean growing apart. Watch the full video, see exclusive content and support the podcast over on ⁠⁠Patreon ⁠⁠ Follow us on Instagram: ⁠⁠@comecurious⁠⁠ and DM us your questions, stories and voicenotes! Follow Florence ⁠⁠@florencebark⁠⁠ Follow Reed ⁠⁠@reedamberx Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Porn is everywhere but how much is too much? What are people actually searching for? And should we be worried about our viewing habits? This week we're diving headfirst into the world of pornography. As former porn creators ourselves, we're unpacking how our relationship with porn has changed over the years, what healthy consumption looks like, and why the conversation around "porn addiction" might be more complicated than people think. We explore: Is porn addiction real or is it better understood as a compulsion? When does watching porn become unhealthy? The world's most searched porn categories (including why hentai has dominated global searches) Why Gen Z's porn habits are changing The fastest-growing sexually active age group How porn can affect relationships, intimacy and desire Our own experiences working in the adult industry Wild, weird and wonderful listener-submitted porn searches From anime to MILFs, roleplay to relationship dynamics, this episode explores what our fantasies can tell us, without judgement. Whether you watch porn regularly, occasionally or not at all, this is an honest conversation about fantasy, shame, curiosity and sexual wellbeing. Watch the full video, see exclusive content and support the podcast over on ⁠⁠Patreon ⁠⁠ Follow us on Instagram: ⁠⁠@comecurious⁠⁠ and DM us your questions, stories and voicenotes! Follow Florence ⁠⁠@florencebark⁠⁠ Follow Reed ⁠⁠@reedamberx Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

What's the actual difference between an ()rgy and a g4ng bang? And why do these two forms of group sx carry such different cultural baggage? In this episode of Come Curious, we're diving into the definitions, misconceptions, fantasies and realities surrounding two of the most talked-about group sx experiences. We explore where these ideas come from, how they've been shaped by mainstream 🌽orn, and why consent, agency and communication matter so much when discussing group sexual experiences. Along the way, we discuss: The difference between ()rgies and g4ng bangs Why group sex remains one of the world's most common fantasies How porn influences our understanding of group sx Listener stories, unexpected experiences and hilarious mishaps Sexual health, testing and safer group play Why these experiences aren't exclusive to any one gender or sexuality How our own relationships with sx, sobriety and intimacy have evolved over time We also take a look at some recent developments in contraception research, including updates in male contraception trials and conversations around informed contraceptive choices. Whether you're simply curious, have fantasised about group sx, or want to better understand the language and culture surrounding it, this episode offers an open, honest and judgement-free discussion. Watch the full video, see exclusive content and support the podcast over on ⁠⁠Patreon ⁠⁠ Follow us on Instagram: ⁠⁠@comecurious⁠⁠ and DM us your questions, stories and voicenotes! Follow Florence ⁠⁠@florencebark⁠⁠ Follow Reed ⁠⁠@reedamberx Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Turns out the sexiest things aren't always sexual. In this episode of Come Curious, we're diving into the unexpected, surprising, and sometimes downright bizarre things that make people feel attracted, connected, and turned on. From fresh bed sheets and gardening to emotional vulnerability and conflict resolution, we're exploring the green flags, personality traits, and everyday moments that can spark desire in ways we never expected. We discuss: Why emotional vulnerability can be incredibly attractive The appeal of emotional regulation and healthy communication Acts of service and why chores can become foreplay Competence, confidence and professional attraction Eye contact, direct communication and feeling desired Nature, scent, fresh sheets and creating an erotic atmosphere Listener submissions about accents, singing, oral fixations and more We also share some personal life updates, including navigating parenthood, balancing work and childcare, and our recent visit to Parliament to discuss the shadow-banning and deplatforming of sx workers, educators and LGBTQ+ creators on social media platforms. Because attraction isn't always about bodies or sex. Sometimes it's about feeling safe, understood, supported or watching someone confidently reverse a car into a parking space. Watch the full video, see exclusive content and support the podcast over on ⁠⁠Patreon ⁠⁠ Follow us on Instagram: ⁠⁠@comecurious⁠⁠ and DM us your questions, stories and voicenotes! Follow Florence ⁠⁠@florencebark⁠⁠ Follow Reed ⁠⁠@reedamberx Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

When cheating happens, everyone wants a simple answer: leave or stay. But real relationships are rarely that straightforward. In this episode of Come Curious, we unpack one of the most painful questions a person can face: should you stay with someone who has cheated on you? Drawing on listener stories, expert insights, personal experiences, and relationship research, we explore why affairs happen, what cheating can reveal about a relationship, and whether trust can genuinely be rebuilt after betrayal. Tune in to hear about: Why people cheat in the first place Emotional affairs vs physical affairs When cheating is a symptom of deeper relationship problems The role of communication, accountability and therapy Signs a relationship may be repairable When leaving might be the healthiest choiceListener stories of recovery, separation and ethical non-monogamy The long-term impact of betrayal on mental health and self-worth We also examine the reality that many couples do stay together after infidelity, and why healing looks different for every relationship. Whether you've been cheated on, cheated yourself, or simply want to understand the psychology behind affairs, this conversation offers compassion, honesty and practical perspectives without reducing a deeply human experience to a simple yes-or-no answer. Shout out to therapist Jemma Hardelle who provided her insight on this topic. You can find her online at @hardelle_jemma on IG and www.jemmahardelle.com Sign the petition for 'Holding Meta Accountable for Wrongful Deletion' Watch the full video, see exclusive content and support the podcast over on ⁠⁠Patreon ⁠⁠ Follow us on Instagram: ⁠⁠@comecurious⁠⁠ and DM us your questions, stories and voicenotes! Follow Florence ⁠⁠@florencebark⁠⁠ Follow Reed ⁠⁠@reedamberx Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

What if orgasm isn't something you're born knowing how to do but a skill you can learn? This week on Come Curious, we're joined by sex educator, author and pleasure advocate Susan Bratton for a mind-expanding conversation about the incredible range of pleasure our bodies are capable of experiencing. We dive into male multiple o's, prostate pleasure, orgasmic intercourse, throat o's, and why so many people have been taught limiting beliefs about their sexual potential. Susan shares practical techniques for men to separate orgasm from ejaculation, explains the "M Breath" method for full-body pleasure, and reveals how learning to recognise the point of no return can completely transform sexual stamina and confidence. We also explore: Male multiple o's and ejaculatory choice Pr0state massage and blended o's Throat o's and overcoming the gag reflex Why o's are a learnable skill How women can experience more pleasure during penetration The surprising connection between pleasure, health and longevity Long-term non-monogamy and relationship anarchy The future of sx toys and teledildonics Whether you're curious about expanding your orgasmic potential, improving partnered sx, or challenging everything you've been taught about pleasure, this episode is packed with practical advice and fascinating insights. Susan's suggestions: Drive Desire Orgasmic Intercourse Follow Susan online at @susanbratton Learn more about the toys Susan mentions: Keon 2 (Pre-Order) Keon LuXus Pearl 3 ProWand You can also get 10% off storewide at checkout using the code ComeCurious10 Watch the full video, see exclusive content and support the podcast over on ⁠Patreon ⁠ Follow us on Instagram: ⁠@comecurious⁠ and DM us your questions, stories and voicenotes! Follow Florence ⁠@florencebark⁠ Follow Reed ⁠@reedamberx Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Is subscribing to someone's OnlyFans cheating? What about texting an ex, keeping a dating app "just to look", or fantasising about someone else during sex? In this special watershed episode, we're diving into the murky grey areas of modern relationships with a boundary-pushing cheating quiz that sparks some surprisingly revealing conversations. Together, we unpack the behaviours that sit between loyalty and betrayal, exploring emotional affairs, secret crushes, dating apps, hidden messages, workplace flirtations, exes, social media boundaries, and what "cheating" actually means in monogamous and non-monogamous relationships. The truth? There isn't one universal definition. What feels harmless to one person might feel devastating to another. This episode is designed to help you better understand your own boundaries, communicate your expectations, and start the conversations many couples avoid until it's too late. ⚠️ This is a Watershed episode. Free listeners get the first half of the conversation, but if you want the full debate, all our answers, and the deeper discussions around ENM, trust, honesty and relationship agreements, you'll need to join us on Patreon. Whether you're happily monogamous, exploring ethical non-monogamy, or simply wondering where your own line is, this episode will leave you with plenty to think about. Watch the full video, see exclusive content and support the podcast over on ⁠Patreon ⁠ Learn about The Love Tank's new Dark Room Etiquette guide to help navigate dark rooms with safety and reassurance here Follow us on Instagram: ⁠@comecurious⁠ and DM us your questions, stories and voicenotes! Follow Florence ⁠@florencebark⁠ Follow Reed ⁠@reedamberx Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

We're back! After a whirlwind few months, Florence and Reed reunite to share some huge life update and trust us, a lot has happened. Florence opens up about her traumatic birth experience, from preeclampsia and induction to the realities of labour, recovery and becoming a mum. Meanwhile, Reed spills the tea on ending a dishonest situationship, finding a healthy new polyamorous relationship, and what dating has taught her about attachment, communication and vulnerability. The pair also dive into some of the biggest stories affecting sexual health right now, including NHS policy changes impacting trans healthcare, breakthroughs in endometriosis and PCOS research, and why menstrual products are finally being tested with real blood. Plus, they answer your questions on: Sex and intimacy after having a baby Maintaining connection during major life changes Dating, honesty and ethical communication Talking about penis size before sex Women's health research and medical advocacy Raw, funny, emotional and completely unfiltered - this is Come Curious catching up on everything you've missed. Watch the full video, see exclusive content and support the podcast over on ⁠Patreon ⁠ Follow us on Instagram: ⁠@comecurious⁠ and DM us your questions, stories and voicenotes! Follow Florence ⁠@florencebark⁠ Follow Reed ⁠@reedamberx Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This week on Come Curious, Reed sits down with kink theorist, power exchange mentor and educator Tripp Terrier to unpack one of the most misunderstood roles in BDSM: the dominant. Together they explore why true dominance isn't about control, arrogance or entitlement but instead, it's about presence, responsibility and service. Tripp shares his unique perspective on power exchange, explaining how authority is earned through knowledge, patience and skill rather than demanded through status or ego. They discuss the importance of integrating every part of yourself including the feminine and more uncomfortable aspects of your personality, and why self-awareness is one of the most powerful tools a dominant can develop. Inside the episode: - Why dominance is a giving role, not a taking one- The difference between confidence and entitlement- How power exchange can become deeply transformative- Why consent is more complex than a simple "yes" or "no"- The role of humility in healthy masculinity and leadership- Supporting partners through subdrop and emotional vulnerability Tripp also shares his essential reading list for anyone curious about kink, including The Topping Book and The Bottoming Book by Janet Hardy and Dossie Easton, alongside The Heart of Dominance and The Dominance Playbook by Anton Fulmen. Whether you're dominant, submissive, curious or simply interested in healthier models of masculinity, this conversation offers a fascinating look into power, connection and personal responsibility. Follow Tripp online @tripp.terrier Come watch the full episode, AD FREE over on Patreon: patreon.com/comecurious And tune in on all major streaming platforms - Come Curious. Follow us on Instagram: @comecurious Florence @florencebark Reed @reedamberx Our podcast is released every Thursday. Listen to the full episode wherever you get your podcasts. Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/4nQnVqQcEn4ptshlKjtdqo Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/gb/podcast/f-ks-given-by-comecurious/id1444176549 Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices