Fkd Up By Faith
Fkd Up By Faith
Jude Mills
Join theologian Jude Mills for conversations with people who've been f****d up by their faith. Be prepared for stories of church harm, religious alienation and spiritual abuse, but also for beautfiful stories of hope, healing, reconciliation and forgiveness. In the bonus series 'UNFKD' Jude tackles theological (and adjacent) ideas that are harmful, misunderstood or... just plain wrong! Content is unapologetically progressive. Conservatives probably won't like it.
UNFKD Episode 19 - WINTER SOLSTICE
In this special Winter Solstice episode of Fkd Up byFaith: UNFKD, recorded on the solstice, in darkness, in the Galloway Forest Park in Scotland, I explore the meaning of the longest night of the year — a threshold between darkness and returning light. I share reflections on the spiritual depth of darkness. There is a gentle invitation to  reflect, to rest, to embrace stillness and the hidden beauty of unknowing. A gentle seasonal reminder that darkness is not the end, but the beginning of hope. Galloway International Dark Sky Park https://forestryandland.gov.scot/visit/forest-parks/galloway-forest-park/dark-skies Last Year’s Solstice episode https://open.spotify.com/episode/5hlxXgHtTYK2heqMzVs9KT?si=xTCncuzzQO2hwtHOF8om2AMusic Credits: “Better Day” by Penguin Music,“Decemder” by Music Word, and “At the Farthest Land” by HarumachiMusic — all royalty-free via Pixabay. Donations made to artists where possible.“O Come, O Come Emmanuel” by K Jason French on Bandcamp. Paid download. 
Dec 22, 2025
16 min
UNFKD Episode 18 - LOVE
"No hate like Christian love" - was the prompt for this episode. A comment on a social media post was met with this response.And I get it. Recorded in the calm before storm Floris from a campervan on the west coast of Scotland, I share a brief reflection on love from a Christian theological perspective. My take is that we are compelled, as Christians, to love. And for me, this means praxis or love in action. However, this is contextualised with awareness that some people have been deeply wounded by Christianity.Bible ReferencesJohn 13:34-35 (NRSV)Matthew 22:36-40 (NRSV)Theological resourcesJeanrond, Werner G. A Theology of Love. London, T & T Clark, 2010.Jeanrond, Werner G., ' Love', in Nicholas Adams, George Pattison, and Graham Ward (eds), The Oxford Handbook of Theology and Modern European Thought (2013; online edn, Oxford Academic, 3 June 2013), https://doi.org/10.1093/oxfordhb/9780199601998.013.0012, Music “Better Day” and “Nebula” by Penguin Music on Pixabay https://pixabay.com/users/penguinmusic-24940186/ “Echoes of Heaven Meditation” by Leigh Robinson from Pixabay
Aug 4, 2025
15 min
UNFKD Episode 17 - HELL
In this episode of UNFKD I tackle one of the most 'harmful,misunderstood and just plain wrong' concepts in theology - HELL. It's one of those projects that, as a theologian, you kind of wish you'd never started. Thank God that there are some wonderful theologians and historians whose work I have relied on in this episode.I took as my starting point the phrase - oft repeated in my Scots childhood - 'Hell Mend Ye!' and I explore why the idea of hell might be a compelling one for religious and non-religious people alike. ReferencesBrock, M.D. (2016). Satan and the Scots : the Devil in Post-Reformation Scotland, c.1560-1700. Abingdon, Routledge.Brown, D. (2023). Hell. St Andrews Encyclopaedia of Theology. [online] Available at: https://www.saet.ac.uk/Christianity/Hell.David Bentley Hart (2019). That All Shall Be Saved : Heaven, Hell, and Universal Salvation. Yale University Press.Music “Better Day” and “Nebula” by Penguin Music on Pixabay https://pixabay.com/users/penguinmusic-24940186/ “Echoes of Heaven Meditation” by Leigh Robinson from Pixabay
Jul 7, 2025
19 min
UNFKD Episode 16 - THE ASCENSION
In this episode of "UNFKD," Jude explores The Ascension. The discussion covers its historical and theological aspects, including its celebration in Catholic and Anglican traditions, and its (sometimes rather amusing) depiction in art. Jude then shares one of her sermons on the Ascension in which she explores the meaning of Jesus being taken "up" into heaven, wondering if heaven is a physical place above the clouds or a spiritual realm beyond our human understanding. Ending with some words from the late Pope Francis on how the Ascension encourages us to seek Christ in our daily lives and serve others with hope and love.ResourcesReading from from the Acts of the Apostles 1: 11 (NRSV)Text of "The Cloud of Unknowing https://sacred-texts.com/chr/cou/index.htm Homily on the Solemnity of the Ascension of the Lord -  from Pope Francis (2018) https://www.vatican.va/content/francesco/en/angelus/2018/documents/papa-francesco_regina-coeli_20180513.htmlVery comprehensive Wikipedia entry on the Ascension https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ascension_of_JesusAscension in the Vatican News https://www.vaticannews.va/en/liturgical-holidays/solemnity-of-the-ascension-of-the-lord.html Ascension resources from Loyola Press https://www.loyolapress.com/catholic-resources/liturgical-year/sunday-connection/ascension-of-the-lord-cycle-c/ Music “Better Day” and “Nebula” by Penguin Music on Pixabay https://pixabay.com/users/penguinmusic-24940186/“echoes-of-heaven-meditation-186652” by Natures Eye on Pixabay https://pixabay.com/users/natureseye-18615106/
Jun 2, 2025
16 min
Episode 34 - with Divine Provisions Co.
I had an absolute blast talking to Emily Larsen and Trey Comstock from Divine Provisions Co. They are both United Methodist pastors based in Houston Texas, and together as Divine Provisions Co. they produce no less than three podcasts.We move from Trey and Emily's Fkd Up By Faith stories - OMG is all I can say - to talking about the theology of pool party baptisms and ministry as a game of Dungeons and Dragons. FULL TYPED TRANSCRIPT AT https://judemills.com/fubf-episode-34-with-divine-provisions-coDIVINE PROVISIONS CO. WEBSITE: https://www.divineprovisions.co/MUSIC : Fkd Up By Faith theme music by the late David GoodallIncidental Music: "Nebula" by Penguin Music on Pixabay
May 3, 2025
51 min
UNFKD Episode 15 -RESURRECTION
In this Easter Monday episode of UNFKD, Jude Mills explores the theological significance of resurrection, exploring various interpretations and beliefs surrounding the event. From the traditional Easter vigil service to the different perspectives on Jesus' resurrection—whether physical, spiritual, or metaphorical—Jude examines how these views shape Christian doctrine and the hope of eternal life. The episode also touches on the role of women in the resurrection narrative and the ongoing debates about the nature of resurrection and eternal life .FULL EPISODE TRANSCRIPT AT https://judemills.com/unfkd-episode-15-resurrection REFERENCES & LINKS The Easter Liturgy in the Church of England https://www.churchofengland.org/prayer-and-worship/worship-texts-and-resources/common-worship/churchs-year/times-and-seasons-6  The Gospel of Luke chapter 24 verses 1-23, 13-32 and 42 The Gospel of John chapter 3 verse 16; chapter 10 verse 30 and chapter 20 Naked Pastor “Women and the Resurrection” cartoon https://nakedpastor.com/products/women-and-the-resurrection  Passage from Julian of Norwich from “Meditations with Julian of Norwich” by Brendan Doyle  p. 77  MUSIC Thine Be The Glory on the organ  https://www.smallchurchmusic.com Introductory Music “Better Day” by Penguin Music on Pixabay https://pixabay.com/users/penguinmusic-24940186/  Incidental Music - “Desert of Mind” by  Harumachi Music on Pixabay https://pixabay.com/users/harumachimusic-13470593/ 
Apr 21, 2025
24 min
NEW SEASON! Episode 33 - with Ann Russo
I am delighted to release new episode and indeed a whole new season of Fkd Up By Faith! I had a great conversation in this episode with Ann Russo (she/her). Ann is a licensed clinical social worker, mental health advocate, educator, and thought leader specializing in addressing complex and often stigmatized topics such as religious trauma, sexual empowerment, ethical non-monogamy, queer identity, and inclusivity in mental health.We talked about religious trauma, the LGBTQ+ community, the current US political climate and its impacts, and Julian of Norwich's cat!TRANSCRIPT OF THIS EPISODE AT https://judemills.com/fubf-episode-33-with-ann-russo LinksAnn's website https://www.annrusso.org/Ann's practice website https://www.amrtherapy.com/⁠Julian of Norwich https://julianofnorwich.org/pages/who-is-julian-of-norwichMusicTitle music by David GoodallIncidental music "Nebula" by Penguin Music on Pixabay
Apr 7, 2025
39 min
UNFKD Episode 14 - LIBERATION THEOLOGY
In this episode, host Jude Mills examines Episcopal Bishop Mariann Edgar Budde's recent address at the National Cathedral, where she directly appealed to the POTUS for mercy toward LGBTQ+ people and migrants. The episode explores Liberation Theology's origins in 1960s Latin America, its core principles including the "preferential option for the poor," and its influence on modern progressive Christianity. Special attention is given to Marcella Althaus-Reid's contributions to queer theology. The episode concludes with a relevant passage from The Gospel of Matthew 25:34-40. A Full transcript of the episode is available at Judemills.com/podcastREFERENCESAlthaus-Reid, Marcella, Indecent Theology : Theological Perversions in Sex, Gender and Politics (London: Routledge, 2010)———, The Queer God (Routledge, 2004)Bishop Mariann, ‘A Service of Prayer for the Nation Homily’, https://edow.org/2025/01/22/a-service-of-prayer-for-the-nation-homilyBishop Mariann Edgar Budde’s website https://www.mariannbudde.comGospel Reading - MATTHEW 25: 34 – 40 (NRSV)Gutiérrez, Gustavo, A Theology of Liberation: History, Politics, and Salvation (Maryknoll, N.Y.: Orbis Books, 1988)Liberation Theology resources https://liberationtheology.orgQueer Theology - Resources for LGBTQ+ Christians and Supporters https://www.queertheology.comMUSIC: "Better Day" and "Nebula" by Penguinmusic on Pixabay penguinmusic - Pixabay
Feb 2, 2025
21 min
UNFKD Episode 13 - EPIPHANY & THE 'BAD' YEAR
In this episode of Fkd Up by Faith: UNFKD, as we step into 2025, I indulge a pet peeve, reflecting on the way we always seem to label the previous year as a 'bad' year and hope that the next one will be better! I explore how the privilege of geography, culture and history shapes this perspective. I also consider the significance of the Christian feast of Epiphany—a celebration of revelation and light breaking into the world— and how it can (and perhaps should) demonstrate hope in action as we welcome in a New Year with purpose. Sources Nouwen, Henri, ‘Do Well the Few Things - Henri Nouwen’, Henri Nouwen Society, 2024 https://henrinouwen.org/meditations/do-well-the-few-things/ Solnit, Rebecca, Hope in the Dark : Untold Histories, Wild Possibilities. (London: Canongate, 2016) http://rebeccasolnit.net The "Christ Has No Body "Prayer is attributed to St. Teresa of Avila, but it is not found in her writings. Much like the prayer of St. Francis its sentiment is pure even if the author is suspect! Conspirituality Podcast https://www.conspirituality.net/episodes Music: "Better Day" and “Chill Lofi Beat” by Penguin Music;"At the Farthest Land" by HarumachiMusic ALL ON PIXABAY
Jan 6, 2025
27 min
UNFKD Episode 12 - ADVENT: SOLSTICE
In this final episode of my Advent series, I delve into the rich symbolism of the winter solstice, the longest night of the year. I reflect on my previous themes of hope, darkness, and liminality, exploring how this season invites rest, transformation, and the anticipation of light's return. I also address the misconception that Christians "stole" the solstice, uncovering some history and the deep resonance between nature's rhythms and spiritual practices across time and cultures. Join me for thoughtful reflections to close this Advent journey. Sources Bradshaw, Paul F., 'The Dating of Christmas: The Early Church', in Timothy Larsen (ed.), The Oxford Handbook of Christmas (2020; online edn, Oxford Academic, 8 Oct. 2020)   Flanders, Judith, Christmas: A Biography (New York: Thomas Dunne Books/St. Martin’s Press, 2017)   Gifford, Daniel, 'The Winter Solstice and Other Celebrations of the Season', in Timothy Larsen (ed.), The Oxford Handbook of Christmas (2020; online edn, Oxford Academic, 8 Oct. 2020),   Poem – The Moment of Magic by Victoria Safford - https://www.uua.org/worship/words/meditation/moment-of-magic Music: "Better Day"by Penguin Music; "Decemder" by Oleksii_Kalyna; "At the Farthest Land" by HarumachiMusic ALL ON PIXABAY
Dec 23, 2024
22 min
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