TW: This episode contains a brief discussion of cancer and loss. If you want to skip it, the guest segment begins at approximately minute 13.Brooke Janousek, founder of Someone You Should Meet, joins Ali to make the case for letting the people who know you best do the talking. Brooke and Ali dig into why apps fail to capture who people actually are, the courage gap between professional and personal life, and what inspired Brooke to start hosting in-person dating events (hint: it was attending a lackluster one herself). The two also chat about what it’s like to finally walk away from a situationship that isn’t working, and how that comes back to the frustrations of dating overall.But first, Ali shares how a personal health scare had her reflecting on how losing her dad to cancer impacts her relationship with her health today (particularly as it was happening on his birthday). This week's Media Mention is: "The Terror of Survivorship" from Laura Behnke's Substack, which dives into that very theme.Where to find Brooke: On Instagram @someoneyoushouldmeet, on TikTok @sysmofficial, at www.someoneyoushouldmeet.com.Timestamps: Brooke joins us at around minute 13.Ask questions, make a Storytime submission, or give feedback here: https://tinyurl.com/fmhpodqsIf you'd like to hear Ali’s personal updates before everyone else as well as exclusive episodes every week, ad-free listening, monthly lives, and more…join FMH on Patreon: www.patreon.com/findingmrheight .Thanks to this week’s partners:Bilt Rewards: Take advantage of your Neighborhood Benefits™ by going to joinbilt.com/fmhAdvertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

You're being interviewed, but you're also doing the interviewing. Most people forget the second part. Ali shares two episodes from the Finding Mr. Height Patreon in this special re-air, covering the interview process from both sides of the table. Part one is a practical guide to vetting a company before you accept an offer: how to use Glassdoor beyond the surface level, what LinkedIn can tell you about turnover patterns, how to interview your interviewer, and more. Part two covers your side of the table: how to tell a coherent, compelling story about your career, how to answer questions with real specificity instead of canned talking points, and why the questions you ask can say just as much about you as the answers you give.Part three of this series is available now on the Patreon at patreon.com/findingmrheight, along with AMAs, monthly live episodes, the Discord community, and more bonus content every week. This week's Media Mention is: "What's Your Interviewing Style?" from HBR IdeaCast (Harvard Business Review), featuring author and former corporate recruiter Anna Papalia.Media Mention link: Harvard Business Review What's Your Interviewing Style?Ask questions, make a Storytime submission, or give feedback here: https://tinyurl.com/fmhpodqsIf you'd like to hear Ali’s personal updates before everyone else as well as exclusive episodes every week, ad-free listening, monthly lives, and more…join FMH on Patreon: www.patreon.com/findingmrheight .Thanks to this week’s partners:Bilt Rewards: Take advantage of your Neighborhood Benefits™ by going to joinbilt.com/fmhAdvertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

This week, Ali sits down with Sarah Vacchiano, author of Soft Launch, who got married at 21, divorced at 27, and moved to New York City to start over from scratch. Sarah shares what it felt like to leave a marriage that looked fine on the outside, how she navigated a world she’d skipped the entry points to, and what it took to finally build an identity that was genuinely hers. She remarried at 37, and the conversation gets into what was fundamentally different about love on the other side of all that work.This week’s Media Mention is Bumble’s announcement that they are scrapping the swipe and dropping the women-message-first rule. CEO Whitney Wolfe Herd calls what’s coming “revolutionary” but has yet to say exactly what it is (though Ali has a guess).Where to find Sarah: On Instagram @sarahmvacchiano and at www.sarahvacchiano.com.Grab Sarah's Book "Soft Launch" here: https://www.sarahvacchiano.com/Timestamps: Sarah joins us at around minute 13.Ask questions, make a Storytime submission, or give feedback here: https://tinyurl.com/fmhpodqsIf you'd like to hear Ali’s personal updates before everyone else as well as exclusive episodes every week, ad-free listening, monthly lives, and more…join FMH on Patreon: www.patreon.com/findingmrheight .Thanks to this week’s partners:Bilt Rewards: Take advantage of your Neighborhood Benefits™ by going to joinbilt.com/fmhAdvertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

TW: This episode includes discussion of grief, miscarriage and emotional abuse.This week, Ali is joined by a listener who shares her story of leaving a marriage rooted in cultural pressure, low self-worth, and years of emotional abuse. The conversation covers the internal voice she ignored while engaged, the compounding grief that finally pushed her out the door, and what it's looked like to rebuild on the other side.This week's Media Mention is a video by @zkiaba on TikTok, where she pushes back on the idea that men are in a social crisis, arguing that what we're seeing is the first generation of men experiencing life without systematic advantage.In Updates, Ali is recording live from Greece on her ninth group girls trip with FMH Travel.Ask questions, make a Storytime submission, or give feedback here: https://tinyurl.com/fmhpodqsIf you'd like to hear Ali’s personal updates before everyone else as well as exclusive episodes every week, ad-free listening, monthly lives, and more…join FMH on Patreon: www.patreon.com/findingmrheight .Thanks to this week’s partners:Bilt Rewards: Take advantage of your Neighborhood Benefits™ by going to joinbilt.com/fmhAdvertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Ali and Skyline are celebrating two years together! Together from Italy, they go deep on what two years actually looks like, covering how they handle disagreements, how intentional they've been about the relationship and whether that was by design or just who they are, what they've each learned about themselves through the relationship, and what surprised them most about each other along the way. Plus, listeners ask about their couple identity, the little habits that make each other smile, where things are headed next, and which annoying habits irk each other the most. But first, the two recap highlights and a few hiccups from their trip to Italy, sadly coming to an end!Ask questions, make a Storytime submission, or give feedback here: https://tinyurl.com/fmhpodqsIf you'd like to hear Ali’s personal updates before everyone else as well as exclusive episodes every week, ad-free listening, monthly lives, and more…join FMH on Patreon: www.patreon.com/findingmrheight .Thanks to this week’s partners:Bilt Rewards: Take advantage of your Neighborhood Benefits™ by going to joinbilt.com/fmhAdvertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Danielle McGeough joins Ali to talk about what happens after you hit the goal you've been chasing your whole career and realize it doesn't feel the way you thought it would (and how this relates to dating!). Danielle, a professor and creator of the RISE Ritual Method, unpacks the difference between burnout and demoralization, why habits alone won't get you out of a hollow season, and how to design rituals that actually move you from where you are to where you want to be.In Updates, Ali and Skyline are officially in Europe, one night into a trip to Italy where they'll also be recording their two-year anniversary episode. Listener questions for that episode are still open!This week’s Media Mention is: Something Different DC, an Instagram account running creative events in Washington, D.C. It’s a great reminder that meeting people off the apps is possible in unusual places!Where to find Danielle: On Instagram @plangoalplan and at www.plangoalplan.com.Take Danielle's "Stuck" assessment here: https://www.plangoalplan.com/stuckTimestamps: Danielle joins us at around minute 9.Ask questions, make a Storytime submission, or give feedback here: https://tinyurl.com/fmhpodqsIf you'd like to hear Ali’s personal updates before everyone else as well as exclusive episodes every week, ad-free listening, monthly lives, and more…join FMH on Patreon: www.patreon.com/findingmrheight .Thanks to this week’s partners:Bilt Rewards: Take advantage of your Neighborhood Benefits™ by going to joinbilt.com/fmhAdvertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Jordanne Sculler, licensed therapist, joins Ali to talk about dating burnout from the inside out. Rather than pointing to apps or circumstances as the culprit, Jordanne breaks down the internal patterns that are really driving exhaustion in dating, including the productivity trap of treating dating like a to-do list, people-pleasing and self-abandonment, and what it actually looks like to break a cycle that isn't working. The conversation gets practical with Jordanne's "do something different" framework, and Ali shares her own experience recognizing these patterns in both dating and long-term relationships.In Updates, Ali shares a scam alert after coming dangerously close to being scammed in a two-part scheme. She also recaps a big week of consulting wins, a full-circle alumni event at her school's centennial celebration, and a return to the bar where she met Skyline two years ago.This week's Media Mention is @blussomly on TikTok and Instagram. Her name is Luise, she has a master's in psychology, and her content is built around teaching the psychology behind stoicism in an accessible, applicable way. Her series "stoicism but make it cute" is worth a full deep dive, and the video Ali references, about the gap between expectation and reality and the difference between something being different versus wrong, is pinned to her Instagram.Where to find Jordanne: On Instagram @jordannesculler and at www.jordannescullerlmhc.com.Timestamps: Jordanne joins us at around minute 20.Ask questions, make a Storytime submission, or give feedback here: https://tinyurl.com/fmhpodqsIf you'd like to hear Ali’s personal updates before everyone else as well as exclusive episodes every week, ad-free listening, monthly lives, and more…join FMH on Patreon: www.patreon.com/findingmrheight .Thanks to this week’s partners:Bilt Rewards: Take advantage of your Neighborhood Benefits™ by going to joinbilt.com/fmhAdvertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Marriage coach Monica Tanner joins Ali to challenge the unwritten rulebook most of us absorbed about relationships without ever questioning it. Monica, the author of Bad Marriage Advice, breaks down why a lot of the advice well-meaning people pass down is not just unhelpful but actively working against us. The conversation covers why "never go to bed angry" is a recipe for sleep deprivation, what it actually means to teach your partner how to treat you, and why compromise is not always the goal. Ali also shares her own examples from her relationship with Skyline.In Updates, Ali reflects on her ongoing curly hair journey and an unexpected emotional realization it triggered, shares a story about a college situationship she had completely forgotten about, and celebrates two years with Skyline, including a special anniversary dinner.This week's Media Mention is "4 Styles of Cleaners" by Amanda Dodson (@nestingyourlife on TikTok), a framework for understanding where you and your partner fall on the tidy/cluttered and sanitized/natural spectrums, and why it matters more than you think for cohabitation.Where to find Monica: On Instagram @monitalksmarriage and at www.monicatanner.com.Grab Monica's book "Bad Marriage Advice: ​Debunking Myths That Will Make You Miserable and What To Do Instead" here: https://www.badmarriageadvice.com/get-the-bookTimestamps: Monica joins us at around minute 29.Ask questions, make a Storytime submission, or give feedback here: https://tinyurl.com/fmhpodqsIf you'd like to hear Ali’s personal updates before everyone else, as well as exclusive episodes every week, ad-free listening, monthly lives, and more, join FMH on Patreon: www.patreon.com/findingmrheight.Thanks to this week’s partners:Bilt Rewards: Take advantage of your Neighborhood Benefits™ by going to joinbilt.com/fmhAdvertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Amy Chan returns to the pod for an in-person recording with Ali, a conversation spurned from her own deep attachment work. The two chat about Amy’s new book Unsingle, where she leverages her personal experiences to help you identify your recurring patterns in relationships. The two get into why you keep choosing the same person in a different body (and how to actually change that), the mechanics of dating from first swipe to long-term commitment, and what healthy interdependence looks like.In Updates, Ali shares a packed couple of weeks including a Broadway show, an intentionally unplanned weekend with Skyline, and a healing curly hair journey that’s going swimmingly.This week's Media Mention is: "Portfolio Careers Are Meant for Generalists" from On Work by Shaina Anderson (Substack), shared by past guest Miriam Tinney on Instagram.Where to find Amy: On Instagram @missamychan, on TikTok @missamychan, at www.missamychan.com.Pre-Order Amy's book "Unsingle How to Date Smarter and Create Love That Lasts" Here: https://missamychan.com/unsingle/Timestamps: Amy joins us at around minute 24.Ask questions, make a Storytime submission, or give feedback here: https://tinyurl.com/fmhpodqsIf you'd like to hear Ali’s personal updates before everyone else as well as exclusive episodes every week, ad-free listening, monthly lives, and more…join FMH on Patreon: www.patreon.com/findingmrheight .Thanks to this week’s partners:Bilt Rewards: Take advantage of your Neighborhood Benefits™ by going to joinbilt.com/fmhAdvertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

This week, Ali sits down with Julia, a listener who shares her experience discovering that vaginal sex just doesn't work for her body. She walks through how that shaped her early dating experiences, including a two-and-a-half year situationship, and what it was like to tell her current partner. They get into why penetration isn't the gold standard of sex, how societal expectations create feelings of unworthiness, and what it looks like to build a full and satisfying sex life on your own terms.In Updates, Ali shares about her birthday week, including her first dry curly cut, a birthday party, and her mom being in town for all of it.This week's Media Mention is allll about the Summer House drama that’s unfolded over the last week, and specifically the racial dimension of the situation and what it reflects about the experience of dating as a Black woman.Vote on our 2027 FMH Travel destinations at https://tinyurl.com/fmh2027tripsAsk questions, make a Storytime submission, or give feedback here: https://tinyurl.com/fmhpodqsIf you'd like to hear Ali’s personal updates before everyone else as well as exclusive episodes every week, ad-free listening, monthly lives, and more…join FMH on Patreon: www.patreon.com/findingmrheight .Thanks to this week’s partners:Armoire: Check out Armoire: https://armoire.style/FMHBilt Rewards: Take advantage of your Neighborhood Benefits™ by going to joinbilt.com/fmhAdvertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy