You don’t have a relationship problem.
You have a pattern problem.
And until you see it, nothing changes.
In this Ask Charlotte episode, we’re unpacking the uncomfortable truth most couples avoid:
it’s not just them… and it’s not just you either.
It’s the dynamic you’re both creating.
If you’ve been:
- Stuck in the same argument on repeat
- Noticing everything your partner does wrong
- Wondering how to take responsibility without blaming yourself
- Trying to “fix” the relationship by analysing them
This episode will shift how you see everything.
We cover:
- Why blame keeps you stuck (and shame isn’t the answer either)
- The “relationship dance” that’s quietly running your interactions
- How your past relationships reveal your current patterns
- The hidden emotional triggers driving conflict
- The one question that changes everything:
Is my behaviour moving us closer… or further away?
Because here’s the truth:
You don’t fix a relationship by diagnosing your partner.
You fix it by understanding what you’re co-creating together.
This is about clarity, not self-blame.
Ownership, not over-functioning.
And finally getting out of the loop you’ve been stuck in.
If you’ve ever thought:
“I know I’m part of this… but I don’t know how to change it”
this episode is for you.
🎧 Listen now and start breaking the pattern.
And if your relationship needs a reset but therapy feels like too much, my Give Me 10 Minutes programme walks you through exactly what to do, week by week.

