Tonya is a fat women relationship anarchist who lives in Florida. We talk about: -What is relationship anarchy - “I don't want to limit or try to define any relationship.” Tonya - Dungeon night! - Community and staying connected through out the year! - An anal fisting scene - A little bit of sex magic! - Feeling honored in our safer sex conversations - HSV and how Tonya talks about genital herpes. - Safer sex testing and privilege - STI and other risky behavior

- Coming out as bisexual. -Other sex positive resorts and getting comfy being naked in a fat body. Finding a sexy resort for the first time! -Periods of low libido -Married and opening your relationship -Relationship dry spells -“being valued as a human being makes a huge difference in whether you feel turned on” Talk ab out being awkward. Talk about gang bangs And a gang bang with no penetration! Get more at http://www.fatgirlfindslove.com

Fat sex-cation Live from Life on the Swingset Take over of Desire in Cancun! We talk about: - Deep diving into polyamory - Deep diving into the BDSM scene in North Carolina - moving in with someone else - Staying married through metamors and changing living situation Sweetness: “we realize that we're not, we're not the same people that we were at different points of our marriage”

Guest interview day! Interview with Jessica from Toronto! We talk about: - Coming out as bisexual. -Other sex positive resorts and getting comfy being naked in a fat body. Finding a sexy resort for the first time! -Periods of low libido -Married and opening your relationship -Relationship dry spells -“being valued as a human being makes a huge difference in whether you feel turned on” Talk ab out being awkward. Talk about gang bangs And a gang bang with no penetration!

Interview with Xine Story on sex vacation! “You don't have to be 100% love your body to, to use it in a way that's pleasurable” How did you become sex positive? Christine: Oh, I was always a horny little slut. “Actually all, all of my partners are, are queer men currently but, his main interest is in guys like sexually. But he's a varsity cuddler!” On Bi men “There were a lot of men putting their mouths in a lot of places. And we like that!” Click for more: www.exxtraordinary.com

I interview Mattie Fricker naked at Desire in Cancun! This is a really fun episode with Matie Fricker of Self Serve Toys! We were there on a takeover of the resort with The Swingset Takes Desire. Overcoming child sexual abuse Coming out as queer Touching a girl’s hand for the first time Learning to feel hunger for sex and eat again “I’m so sure that you’re wrong that you’re body is wrong. I am 100% confident that you’re wrong about hating your body” Mattie Fricker

You shouldn’t have to deal with fatphobia. So I’m here to pass on some resources for you this holiday season. If you want to talk more about this join the Exxxxtraordinary FB group! It’s a fat only space! The whole series of fat positive, anti diet songs, article and stip. Going into the holidays if you’re going to go “home” or other places that might not be awesome for your mental health or that are fat phobic, here are some tips I’ve come up with to help!

This podcast is going to see us have a lot of the conversation about partnership. This idea is so often centered around the interaction between a man and a woman and mostly in relation to straight, married people. Oh and monogamous people. That’s not what we are referring to here specifically on this show – so today I want explode those boxes and discuss the wide variety of partnerships, relationships, sexuality, attraction and how that relates (and doesn’t relate) to gender identity. When I’m talking about partnership, I’m really talking about interrelating with people who will help you do something more, or be more than you can be by yourself. That doesn’t really have anything to do with gender. It doesn’t have anything to do with sexuality. It doesn’t have anything to do with romance. EPISODE RECAP Anywhere that you use the word of should it’s likely you are talking about an expectation. Also you people say things like “Well everyone knows …” that is also a sign you are referring to an expectation. I want to explicitly talk about being inclusive of different genders and sexualities and sexual and relationship preferences. Genderbread.org does a great job at breaking down pieces that people get confused. Identity like gender identity, gender expression, identity and expression in general sex, gender and sexual orientation. I generally identify as a, bisexual woman and I am in an open relationship. Let’s talk about the difference between between sex and gender, your sex is  usually like anatomical sex as in your genitals, what's between your legs, your chromosomes, your hormones, your body hair etc - but what it's not is your gender, right? Gender identity is the psychological sense of who you, who of self, of who you are in your head, who you know yourself to be, based of course on how much you align or don't align with the under, with, um, what you understand the options for gender to be Why do the conversations about the fluidity of gender get people so upset? It can cause a limbic flight or freeze hindbrain response and that can see us get angry - fast. But the truth of it is - other people's gender is really none of our business. And who they have sex with is none of our business - unless the person they have sex with is you. My gender expression is generally pretty femme - my gender identity mostly matches my anatomical sex and my gender expression - but that’s not the case for everyone. Sexual attraction isn't really a component of gender, however, we often conflate sexual orientation with gender or categorize the attraction of experience in gendered ways. The labels around sexual orientation themselves are so gendered The social scripts for love, relationship and even sex are so specific and inflexible.  Learning is what is going to breed tolerance and understanding! The more understanding that you have, having more exposure etc, the easier time you'll have when you encounter, different genders and sexualities - the more you know, understand and feel familiar with all of this, the more understand and tolerance you will have. LINKS http://genderbread.org/ The Intersex Society of North America (ISNA) https://isna.org/ SPREAD THE WORD You can support the show for as little as $2 a month! I’d would love for you to come on this journey with us and be an active part of making the show happen. Support the show here on Patreon.

Expectations are a thing I was blown away by once I got to understanding what expectations are and how they totally have the possibility of hijacking my life. When we say “Oh, I expected you to do this” we say it as though it were true thing, when nearly a 100% of the time we have not told the other person what our expectations are. Yeah. And therein lies the trap.  

The reason we're like dying to be in relationship and the reason that it's so painful when, when breakups happen, friendship breakup happened is because CONNECTION is a core need for us as human beings. You know how can actually be as painful to break up with someone or to have a friend breakup as it is to like break your arm. There, there are good reasons for that. But there is so much about this whole thing about of wanting to be in relationship that we have backwards. Today we going to unpack CONNECTION. Connection: to join link or Fasten together, unite or bind to associate mentally or emotionally