To divorce with dignity, couples need closure. Until we’ve said goodbye to the relationship, we simply can’t let go of the blame and shame of the breakup and reach a peaceful resolution. But what does that look like? How can we work through the grief early on, so that we don’t end up having very expensive arguments in an attorney’s office?A relationship expert with four decades in private practice, Dr. Bonnie Eaker-Weil is widely recognized as one of America’s best couples therapists. She is the bestselling author of several books, including Make Up, Don’t Break Up: Finding and Keeping Love for Singles and Couples and Adultery: The Forgivable Sin. Dr. Bonnie has appeared on Good Morning America, The Today Show and Oprah, and her work has been featured in The New York Times and New York Magazine, among many other publications. On this episode, Dr. Bonnie joins Katherine to explain why it’s crucial to say goodbye to an old relationship before you can say hello to a new one and describe how children express what couples suppress in the divorce process. Dr. Bonnie also shares the top mistakes divorcing couples make, describing how she helps couples leave WITHOUT blame or shame. Listen in for Dr. Bonnie’s insight on getting closure when your ex won’t cooperate and learn why the temporary pain of an intentional goodbye is so much better than playing out the emotional battle in a lawyer’s office!Topics CoveredDr. Bonnie’s insight that children express what couples suppressWhy it’s crucial to say goodbye to your old relationshipGetting closure with your ex before you enter the lawyer’s officeHow to get closure and leave WITHOUT blame or shameThe top mistakes people make in the divorce process1. Sidestep conflict (peace at any price)2. Avoid ex-spouse3. Brady Bunch expectations4. Badmouth, criticize exWhy the temporary pain of closure is preferable to avoidanceHow to get closure for yourself if your ex refuses to cooperateThe magic in connecting with your ex in a different wayWhy Dr. Bonnie sees adultery as the forgivable sinNavigating the ‘power struggle’ stage of a romantic relationshipConnect with Dr. Bonnie Eaker-WeilDr. Bonnie Eaker-Weil’s WebsiteCall (212) 606-3787Connect with Katherine MillerThe Center for Understanding Conflict: http://understandinginconflict.org/Miller Law Group: https://westchesterfamilylaw.com/Katherine on LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/kemiller1The New Yorker’s Guide to Collaborative Divorce by Katherine Miller: https://www.amazon.com/New-Yorkers-Guide-Collaborative-Divorce/dp/0692496246Email: [email protected]Call (914) 738-7765ResourcesFree Chapter of Dr. Bonnie’s Book: http://doctorbonnie.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/05/Adultery-Ch-16.pdfDr. Bonnie’s Stepmom Course: http://doctorbonnie.com/drbonnieStepmomCourse/Make Up, Don’t Break Up: Finding and Keeping Love for Singles and Couples by Dr. Bonnie Eaker-Weil and Harville Hendrix: https://www.amazon.com/Make-Up-Dont-Break-Finding/dp/1605503606Adultery: The Forgivable Sin by Dr. Bonnie Eaker-Weil: https://www.amazon.com/Adultery-Forgivable-Bonnie-Eaker-Weil/dp/1587768151