Divorce Dialogues
Divorce Dialogues
Katherine Miller
Divorce Dialogues helps people navigate divorce with dignity, clarity, and perspective. Through thoughtful conversations with experts and practitioners, the show explores the emotional, financial, legal, and relational realities of divorce, so listeners can make better decisions, communicate more effectively, and move forward with greater confidence. Because divorce is more than a legal transaction, it’s a deeply human transition.
Andrew O'Brien on Why Divorced Dads Need Community
Most divorce conversations center on paperwork, parenting plans, and finances. The loneliness fathers carry through that process rarely gets a seat at the table.In this episode, Andrew O'Brien, founder of Dad Tribes, talks openly about what men actually go through when a family separates — the silence of an empty house, the loss of a social life that was built around a relationship, and the quiet guilt of feeling like your needs shouldn't take up space. Andrew is living it in real time: he moved into a new home days before this conversation was recorded, six kids and a minivan's worth of belongings in tow.Together, Katherine and Andrew get into why so many fathers wait years — sometimes a decade — before leaving a relationship they know isn't working, why anger becomes the default emotion when men don't have community to process what's happening, and what it actually looks like when a dad finds his people again.This is a conversation about what fathers need to hear before, during, and after divorce — and why the support they build around themselves matters as much to their kids as it does to them.In this episode, you'll learn:Why "if my kids are happy, I'm happy" is a mindset that backfires — on the kids and the father;What happens emotionally when the social life a couple built together disappears overnight;Why men often stay in relationships far longer than they should, and what keeps them there;How to take the first steps toward rebuilding community after separation; andWhat children actually gain when their fathers stop pretending everything is fineHighlights: (00:00) Meet Andrew O’Brien and Dad Tribes(05:48) Rebuilding from Nothing: Andrew's Own Separation (08:26) Why Isolation Is the Biggest Hidden Struggle (13:12) When Men Are Treated Like an ATM (14:44) How Loneliness Shapes Parenting During Divorce (15:53) How to Start Rebuilding Community (18:21) A Father's Emotional Health and a Child's Wellbeing (20:11) Common Misconceptions About Divorced Fathers (23:12) What Every Father Should Know Before Divorce (24:25) Reframing Divorce as an Expansion, Not a Breaking (25:37) What Happens When Dads Finally Find Their PeopleAbout our guest, Andrew O’BrienWebsite: https://www.dadtribes.com/ LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/andrew-obrien-dad-tribes/ About Divorce Dialogues and Miller Law GroupKatherine’s LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/kemiller1/ Miller Law Group: https://miller-law.com/More on her book “The Emotionally Savvy Divorce” at: https://katherinemiller.com/book/
Jun 25
30 min
When Support Stops: Protecting Your Family with Jeff Landers
Your settlement agreement is signed, but what happens if the money stops coming?In this episode, divorce financial specialist Jeff Landers returns to break down one of the most overlooked risks in divorce: the fragility of alimony and child support. Death, disability, a job wiped out by a failing industry can make court-ordered support disappear overnight. And most settlement agreements offer no protection against any of them.Jeff has worked on over 1,000 divorce cases nationwide and rarely sees disability insurance included in a settlement. He explains why that gap exists, what it costs families when it goes unfilled, and how to think about financial protection before you sign, not after.The conversation moves beyond insurance mechanics into the real decisions people face: how to build a realistic post-divorce budget, why the receiving spouse should own the life insurance policy, when keeping the house actually works against you, and why rushing to finalize an agreement because you're emotionally exhausted is one of the most expensive mistakes you can make.Tune in for a practical, grounded conversation about securing the deal you worked so hard to negotiate and making sure it actually holds.In this episode, you'll learn:Why alimony and child support are far more fragile than most people assume;The difference between group disability insurance and the private coverage that actually protects support payments;How to calculate the right life insurance coverage amount — and why a made-up number in the settlement agreement doesn't cut it;What "present value" means and why it matters when protecting future financial obligations; andWhy the time to get insurance in place is during negotiations, not after the divorce is finalized.Highlights:(00:00) Meet Jeff Landers(02:31) How fragile is support, really?(05:19) Death, disability, and what the courts can and can't fix(07:53) The homeowners insurance analogy(09:55) Who carries the most risk (and why)(13:14) Get the policies before the divorce is final(13:23) Most common financial mistakes in divorce(19:04) Making life insurance less intimidating(20:43) How to calculate the right coverage amount(22:11) Understanding present value without the math panic(23:14) What people wish they'd known sooner(25:06) The reframe: financial protection as peace of mindAbout our guest, Jeff LandersJeff’s LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/jefflanders/ Hello Monthly Income: https://hellomonthlyincome.com/ About Divorce Dialogues and Miller Law Group Katherine's LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/kemiller1/Miller Law Group: https://miller-law.com/ More on her book The Emotionally Savvy Divorce at: https://katherinemiller.com/book/
Jun 18
29 min
Divorce as a Second Chance with Holly Moore
Divorce ends a marriage. It doesn't have to end your sense of self.In this episode, family law attorney, founder of Moore Family Law Group, and host of the podcast Made For Moore, Holly Moore, talks about what divorce actually costs people beyond the legal fees: their identity, their confidence, and the story they thought their life was supposed to tell.Holly and Katherine dig into why so many people arrive at divorce already hollowed out — not by the split itself, but by years of losing themselves inside the marriage.Their conversation moves through grief, shame, the weight of other people's expectations, and what it genuinely takes to stop surviving and start rebuilding.Tune in for a conversation that treats divorce less as a legal event and more as a turning point. One that, chosen or not, opens a door most people didn't know was there.In this episode, you'll learn:Why identity loss often begins long before the divorce papers are filed;How the grief in divorce is less about the person and more about the "shoulds" we've been carrying;What it takes to stop operating from a victim mindset — and why it matters strategically, not just emotionally; andWhere to start when you feel completely disconnected from yourself and don't know who you are anymore.About our guest, Holly MooreLinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/hollyjmoore/ Website: https://moorefamilylawgroup.com/Made for Moore Podcast: https://moorefamilylawgroup.com/podcast/About Divorce Dialogues and Miller Law GroupKatherine’s LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/kemiller1/ Miller Law Group: https://miller-law.com/More on her book “The Emotionally Savvy Divorce” at: https://katherinemiller.com/book/
Jun 11
29 min
Kelly Lise Murray on Why Smart People Make Costly Mistakes in Divorce
The most expensive divorce mistakes aren't made in the courtroom – they're made in the sequence of events that lead you there.In this episode of Divorce Dialogues, Katherine Miller speaks with Kelly Lise Murray, professor, financial strategist, and Co-founder and CEO of Vetting the House, about the hidden sequencing problem at the heart of most divorce settlements.Together, they unpack why even highly accomplished people make costly financial decisions during divorce—not because they lack intelligence, but because they're operating with a brain under siege, incomplete information, and pressure to just get it done. Kelly draws on her work at the intersection of real estate, tax strategy, and financial advocacy to show how the order in which you make decisions determines what you actually walk away with.If you've ever felt the pull to just accept a deal and move on, this conversation will make you think twice—and give you the tools to slow down before it costs you.In this episode, you'll learn:Why the sequence of asset sales, not just the assets themselves, determines your tax liability;How the "divorce brain" reduces your decision-making capacity — even if you're highly accomplished;Why property division is permanent, and the questions to ask before you agree to anything; andHow to use tax timelines and divorce milestones together to protect your financial outcome.Highlights:(00:00) Meet Kelly Lise Murray (02:56) The Sequencing Problem in Divorce Settlements (04:23) Capital Gains, Exclusions, and the Two-House Trap (05:49) Why Smart People Make Expensive Mistakes (07:44) Building the Right Financial Team (17:55) What "Permanent" Really Means in Property Division (27:26) The Reframe: Mapping Tax Years Against Divorce Milestones (29:31) Your Voice Is Your PreparationAbout our guest, Kelly Lise MurrayWebsite: https://vettingthehouse.com/LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/kellylisemurray/ About Divorce Dialogues and Miller Law GroupKatherine’s LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/kemiller1/ Miller Law Group: https://miller-law.com/More on her book “The Emotionally Savvy Divorce” at: https://katherinemiller.com/book/
Jun 4
30 min
Alyssa Mairanz on How Grief Shapes Your Decisions During Divorce
Your brain on divorce doesn't always think straight. Beneath the legal paperwork and custody schedules lies a deeply physiological reality: intense heartbreak, anger, and grief can completely hijack your nervous system, driving you to make choices you’ll later regret. In this episode of Divorce Dialogues, Katherine Miller speaks with Alyssa Mairanz, owner and executive director of Empower Your Mind Therapy, about what happens in your brain and nervous system during a separation. Together, they explore how grief, anger, and shame can shape your decisions, and how to navigate these emotions with awareness and intention; offering a roadmap for emotional survival and genuine resilience. Through Alyssa's insights, learn how emotional dysregulation and the "fight or flight" response impact your ability to make clear, grounded decisions. Alyssa shares practical tools from Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT) to help you stop reacting out of impulsiveness and start responding intentionally. They discuss the messy, non-linear cycle of grief—including the heavy roles of anger and shame—and how to separate your ex's reactions from your own self-worth. If you are struggling to find your footing while navigating a separation, this conversation provides the actionable grounding techniques and self-compassion needed to move forward. In this episode, you’ll learn: - How your nervous system responds to divorce and the effect on decision-making; - Ways to recognize and manage emotional reactivity versus intentional response; - Practical grounding techniques from Dialectical Behavior Therapy to regain clarity; and - How to separate your self-worth from your external reactions and rebuild identity Highlights: (00:00) Meet Alyssa Mairanz (02:40) Divorce and Your Mind-Body Connection (03:18) Understanding Anger, Shame, and the Grief Cycle (07:22) Emotional Dysregulation and Decision-Making (09:01) DBT Tools for Intentional Responses (12:01) Grounding Yourself and Checking the Facts (18:34) Keeping Focus on Your Goals Amid Divorce (22:18) Rebuilding Your Identity After Marriage (24:06) Navigating Grief and Building Resilience (28:37) Self-Compassion and Recognizing Your Strength About our guest, Alyssa Mairanz Website: https://eymtherapy.com/about/ LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/alyssa-mairanz-lmhc-cdbt-b4ab8a39/ About Divorce Dialogues and Miller Law Group Katherine’s LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/kemiller1/ Miller Law Group: https://miller-law.com/ More on her book “The Emotionally Savvy Divorce” at: https://katherinemiller.com/book/
May 26
29 min
Reframing What “Winning” Means in Divorce with Jenny Bradley
Divorce doesn’t have to be a battle. What if it could be a thoughtful, strategic decision for your future? In this episode, Jenny Bradley, family lawyer and mediator, explores how reframing divorce can lead to more thoughtful, cooperative solutions that protect your family, your finances, and your future. Divorce is often seen as an adversarial process, but Jenny argues that this mindset is not only costly but unnecessary. She offers insight into how focusing on what you can agree upon—and intentionally shifting away from reactive behavior—can lead to more effective and dignified outcomes. Tune in for a conversation about how the way you navigate divorce is just as important as the outcome itself, and why choosing a less combative path might be the best decision for your long-term well-being. In this episode, you’ll learn: - Why divorce is not about “winning” but making decisions for your future; - The common misconceptions about the traditional divorce process; - How to shift from a reactive mindset to one of cooperation and clarity; and - The importance of focusing on agreements rather than conflicts, especially when children are involved Highlights: (00:00) Meet Jenny Bradley (03:00) The myth of "winning" and why it's not the goal of divorce (05:30) The First Mindset Shift (10:00) The complexity of high-conflict divorces without children involved (12:30) Conflict Doesn't Have to Be Destructive (17:00) What Happens When You Settle (20:00) The Power of Mediation and Collaboration (25:00) Avoiding Common Mistakes (29:00) Why relying on AI in the divorce process can be risky (32:00) Looking forward to the next steps in family law About our guest, Jenny Bradley LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/jennybradleyatty Triangle Smart Divorce: http://trianglesmartdivorce.com/ About Divorce Dialogues and Miller Law Group Katherine’s LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/kemiller1/ Miller Law Group: https://miller-law.com/ More on her book “The Emotionally Savvy Divorce” at: https://katherinemiller.com/book/
May 21
32 min
Why Emotional Regulation is Better than “Happy” for Kids During Divorce with Dr. Sasha Reiisieh
What actually helps children through divorce is often misunderstood. Many parents focus on minimizing disruption, protecting feelings, or maintaining a sense of normalcy. But children are not measuring legal outcomes or schedules—they are responding to something more subtle and more powerful: the emotional tone between the adults they depend on. In this conversation, Katherine Miller speaks with Dr. Sasha Reiisieh, licensed therapist and founder of Compassionate Minds Therapy who specializes in early childhood mental health and relational trauma, about what children truly experience during divorce, and what supports their long term sense of safety and stability. This is not a discussion of worst case outcomes. It is a clear, grounded look at how children adapt, what they internalize, and how parents can show up in ways that serve their child’s emotional foundation, even in the middle of their own uncertainty. Children do not need a perfect family structure. They need clarity, consistency, and regulated connection. In this episode, you’ll learn: - Why conflict between parents, not divorce itself, is often the most destabilizing factor for children - How children interpret emotional inconsistency, even when parents try to keep things “normal” - Why two calm, regulated homes can be more stabilizing than one tense household. Highlights: (00:00) Meet Dr. Sasha Reiisieh (03:11) What Children Actually Experience in Divorce (05:33) Why Fixing Is Not the Goal (08:45) The Child Who Seems Fine (13:18) How Parents’ Emotions Shape Children (18:59) Conflict That Harms Children Most (21:39) Why Early Childhood Matters So Much (24:01) The Problem With Performing “Fine” (28:33) A Different Way to Think About Divorce (30:48) What Surprises Experts About Children’s Adaptation About our guest, Dr. Sasha Reiisieh Website: https://compassionatemindstherapy.com/ LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/sasha-reiisieh-edd-lpcc-8ab910126/ About Divorce Dialogues and Miller Law Group Katherine’s LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/kemiller1/ Miller Law Group: https://miller-law.com/ More on her book “The Emotionally Savvy Divorce” at: https://katherinemiller.com/book/
May 14
36 min
Divorce Isn’t a Weapon: Reframing Separation with Karen McNenny
Divorce is often framed as a battle, something to survive or endure. But what if it could be something you approach with intention, clarity, and respect? In this episode, Katherine Miller is joined by Karen McNenny, who not only is an advocate for Family Centered Divorce Reform, but is also an author, speaker, and the founder of The Good Divorce Academy. Together, they challenge the typical narrative of divorce and offer a fresh perspective: divorce as a tool of transformation. Through Karen's insights, explore how the mindset you bring to the divorce process can shape not just the outcome, but how you experience it. Karen shares her philosophy of a "good divorce"—one that honors both individuals, protects the family structure, and allows for a peaceful future, especially for those with children. They discuss how we can break away from adversarial thinking and instead focus on creating a positive, cooperative post-divorce life. If you’re navigating the complexities of divorce or know someone who is, this conversation provides clarity and actionable insights to approach this transition with intention and care. In this episode, you’ll learn: - How to approach divorce with intention rather than reaction; - The key difference between surviving and doing divorce well; - Why focusing on family before finances can lead to better outcomes; and - How to transform conflict into collaboration for the future of your family Highlights: (00:00) Meet Karen McNenny (02:45) What Is a Good Divorce? (07:30) Divorce as a Tool for Transformation (10:36) The Impact of Mindset on Divorce (15:11) The Importance of Communication Before the Legal Process (23:40) Preserving Family Integrity Post-Divorce (29:51) Managing Emotions and Staying Grounded During Divorce About our guest, Karen McNenny Website: https://www.karenmcnenny.com/ LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/gooddivorcecoach/ Listen to the Good Divorce® Show: https://www.karenmcnenny.com/good-divorce-show/ About Divorce Dialogues and Miller Law Group Katherine’s LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/kemiller1/ Miller Law Group: https://miller-law.com/ More on her book “The Emotionally Savvy Divorce” at: https://katherinemiller.com/book/
May 7
36 min
Overcoming Financial Overwhelm in Divorce with Kimberly Palmer
Divorce can turn your financial world upside down, but it doesn't have to stay that way. In this episode of Divorce Dialogues, Katherine Miller is joined by Kimberly Palmer, a personal finance expert from NerdWallet and the author of “Smart Mom, Rich Mom.” Together, they dive deep into the financial challenges that come with divorce, offering practical advice to help you regain control of your finances. Kimberly offers a judgment-free approach, guiding individuals to build a sustainable, grounded financial future that supports their life and goals. She emphasizes taking small, manageable steps and aligning financial decisions with personal values, which is especially vital when dealing with the intense emotions of divorce. This empowers people to not only grasp the financial figures but also to establish a secure foundation. This conversation provides clarity, reassurance, and actionable steps to help you move forward with confidence. In this episode, you’ll learn: - Practical steps to rebuild your finances after divorce and regain control over your money; - How to shift your mindset to confidently manage finances on your own, even if you weren’t previously involved; - The importance of aligning your financial decisions with your core values for long-term stability; and - Common mistakes to avoid and how to break down financial tasks into manageable steps for clarity and confidence. Highlights: (00:00) Meet Kimberly Palmer (02:29) How divorce disrupts women’s financial plans (04:44) The impact of historical money lessons on divorce (08:05) Creating a cashflow statement for financial clarity (09:55) Taking small steps to tackle financial overwhelm (11:27) Common financial mistakes during divorce (13:23) Balancing long-term goals with short-term financial stress (17:07) Building financial confidence after being less involved (19:03) Redefining financial identity after divorce (20:19) Overcoming money shame and seeking support (22:18) Rethinking budgeting to align with your values (23:52) Stories of women successfully rebuilding financially post-divorce About our guest, Kimberly Palmer Website: https://www.nerdwallet.com/ Download the app for resources from NerdWallet: https://tinyurl.com/2u3c9fhx LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/kimberlyspalmer/ Kimberly Palmer is a personal finance expert at NerdWallet. She is also the author of three books about money: "Smart Mom, Rich Mom," "The Economy of You" and “Generation Earn.” About Divorce Dialogues and Miller Law Group Katherine’s LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/kemiller1/ Miller Law Group: https://miller-law.com/ More on her book “The Emotionally Savvy Divorce” at: https://katherinemiller.com/book/
Apr 30
26 min
Starting Your Next Chapter After Divorce with Tamara Frankfort Odinec
Divorce doesn’t just change your life, it disrupts the story you thought you were living. So how do you begin again? In this episode of Divorce Dialogues, Katherine Miller speaks with Tamara Frankfort Odinec, the founder of My Next Chapter, about how to reframe divorce not as a loss but as an opportunity for reinvention. Tamara’s journey from navigating her own divorce to building a platform dedicated to helping others thrive after separation is a story of resilience, empowerment, and self-discovery. Tamara shares insights into the emotional and practical realities of starting over post-divorce, from rediscovering who you are to redefining your goals. Together, they explore how to handle feelings of loneliness, the challenges of financial independence, and the transformative power of embracing change rather than staying stuck in the past. This conversation is filled with compassion and practical advice for anyone looking to rebuild with clarity, confidence, and a sense of purpose. In this episode, you’ll learn: - How to reframe divorce not as a loss, but as an opportunity for personal growth, self-discovery, and creating a more intentional future; - The importance of finding a supportive community to help you navigate the emotional and practical challenges of divorce and provide the encouragement needed to move forward; and - How to prepare both emotionally and financially before making the decision to divorce, empowering you to make confident, informed choices and rebuild your life with clarity and independence. Highlights: (00:00) Meet Tamara Frankfort Odinec (02:28) What Is My Next Chapter and How It Helps People Post-Divorce (04:58) The Emotional and Practical Realities of Starting Over After Divorce (05:46) Navigating Loneliness and Finding a Supportive Community (06:40) The Role of Finances in the Rebuilding Process Post-Divorce (07:15) The Importance of Reframing Divorce from a Loss to an Opportunity (08:21) How to Help People Stuck in the "Stay or Go" Phase of Their Marriage (09:57) Preparing Emotionally and Financially Before Making the Decision to Divorce (13:08) Discovering Your Identity After Years in a Relationship (17:32) The Difference Between Healing and Rebuilding Post-Divorce (19:43) Gaining Confidence and Agency in the Next Chapter of Life About our guest, Tamara Frankfort Odinec Website: https://www.mynextchapter.com/ LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/tamaraodinec/ About Divorce Dialogues and Miller Law Group Katherine’s LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/kemiller1/ Miller Law Group: https://miller-law.com/ More on her book “The Emotionally Savvy Divorce” at: https://katherinemiller.com/book/
Apr 23
31 min
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