About ten years ago, I found myself in a relationship with a man that turned me into the invisible girlfriend. No matter how much I did, I never felt like I was enough. While the relationship didn't last forever, the lessons I learned along the way have had an enduring impact and have critically informed my journey towards rediscovering my human. As a chronic overachiever, I tend to leave little room for failure in my life. Success has always come easily to me while working my way up the corporate ladder, but I have struggled when it comes to building and maintaining intimate relationships. I had to realize that my need to win was attracting me to people who made it hard to do just that. When I wasn’t getting back what I was giving, I gave harder. I had to learn how to escape the burden of fixing things for everyone else, so I could find space to fix things for me.  Tune into this week’s episode of Did You Human Today to hear more about my journey as the invisible girlfriend. Learn how I retrained my old way of thinking and became an advocate for the woman I am, so I could achieve success in my intimate relationships, too.    Quotes • “Being an overachiever allowed me to go out of my way to do a lot of things to try to somehow prove my value and prove my worth to people.” (07:30- 07:40)  • “Looking back at it, it's crazy to me to see things I would do for the pursuit of success. My desire for monetary success or success in climbing the corporate ladder spilled over into my relationship.” (13:24-13:33)  • “I realized I had trained myself for so long to always want to win and the feeling of wanting to win did not have an expiration date.”  (16:44-16:56)  • “I had to realize that my need to win and to fix things was making me attract people who made it where I had to fix things and work hard to win.”  (20:49- 21:08)   Links Connect with Kendra: Website: https://kendrajlewis.com/ Email: [email protected]  Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/thebossarchitect/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/thebossarchitect/ LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/company/the-boss-architect/about/   Podcast production and show notes provided by FIRESIDE Marketing

“I didn’t want a promotion, I just wanted respect,” says Kendra Lewis, host of Did You Human Today. Kendra explains that in one of her first executive roles, she completely turned things around at her company for the better. Yet, despite receiving endless compliments behind the scenes, she was never credited for her work by the company’s higher ups. When the time came for a company-wide restructuring, Kendra was the only person on the leadership team to receive a demotion. Despite her impressive achievements, she was left feeling invisible. Taneka Johnson, this week’s guest, has faced similar challenges as a black woman in corporate. Early on in her career, Taneka started working as a Document Control Specialist and Training Coordinator at a manufacturing company. She quickly excelled in her role and was encouraged by higher ups to apply to more senior positions on three different occasions during her time there. However, each time Taneka applied and got her hopes up, the company hired someone else behind her back, as if her application had never even been considered. Tune into this week’s episode of Did You Human Today for a conversation about the invisibility of black women in corporate America. Learn more about the frustrations Kendra and Taneka encountered along their corporate journeys, the desensitization that arises when you’re constantly overlooked, and how to advocate for yourself to make your voice heard. You should never feel like just another body in a cubicle. Sometimes you just have to create your own table, so you can show up for yourself when no one else will.   Quotes • “I know in my journey, I was in so many environments that I did not know were toxic….And it took me a little bit of time to start understanding those indicators. And I remember being in positions where I was working so hard, and I was literally running circles around my counterparts in these positions, and I still felt like I wasn’t getting the...recognition, definitely was not getting the credit for what I was doing.” (6:52-7:42) • “When I started to doubt myself, when I started to feel that I was less than or not worthy in a work environment, that became my indicator that it was a toxic environment.” (8:11-8:25) • “Think about one, being on this yo-yo, not knowing whether you’re going to have a job in the next month or not and now being...the cornerstone in this environment. You’re filling so many roles, you have so many responsibilities, and on top of that being constantly approached with opportunities, but never having any follow-through for those opportunities.” (20:18-20:52) • “I’ll never forget getting so many accolades behind the scenes...but when it came time for the president to come visit or some of the other executives for different divisions, guess who didn’t get to present their own work. Or guess who would find out later on about these meetings that had happened where someone else got to take credit for what I had done….I didn’t want a promotion, I just wanted respect.” (24:28-25:16) • “This young man, who let’s just face it does not look anything like me, he was being accelerated on his journey. They wanted to get him on the executive path. And so, they felt that the sacrificial lamb...would be the odd ball out on the leadership team. So, in the midst of the restructure that touched pretty much everybody on the leadership team’s scope of work, I was the only one that got demoted.” (28:55-29:32) • “It’s very emotionally draining just knowing that you worked so hard to go and get the credentials, you worked so hard to be a team player, you worked so hard to be a leader in your environment and just help be a change agent in your environment, but you never get the accolades or the recognition or anything for it, unless it’s for them to add additional responsibilities to your plate.” (32:05-32:27)   Links Connect with Taneka: Facebook: @cultivatewithtj Instagram: @cultivatewithtj LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/taneka-johnson-3351b88b/   Connect with Kendra: Website: https://kendrajlewis.com/ Email: [email protected]  Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/thebossarchitect/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/thebossarchitect/ LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/company/the-boss-architect/about/   Podcast production and show notes provided by FIRESIDE Marketing

Welcome to Did You Human Today, a podcast created to help women find a healthy balance between success and life.   After 12 years in corporate America, Kendra found herself sitting in a CVS parking lot feeling utterly defeated, yet unable to cry. She realized that she couldn’t cry because she had subconsciously trained herself not to. After over a decade of learning how to run on fumes, Kendra had lost her human. In the midst of trying to figure out life, she had stopped living.   Kendra started Did You Human Today to help women like her rediscover their human. In this podcast, she will continue the process of reprogramming herself and act as an accountability partner for her listeners as they reconnect with their most authentic and connected selves.    As you listen to this sneak peek episode, take a moment to reflect: did YOU human today?