Deconstructing Yourself
Deconstructing Yourself
Michael W. Taft
Dedicated to liberation in all its forms, Deconstructing Yourself is passionate about fearlessly investigating, attempting, and questioning all things to do with awakening, meditation, mindfulness, brain hacking, consciousness, neurofeedback, and more.Your host Michael W. Taft interviews some of the most interesting thinkers, authors, and teachers around, as well as other offerings. In this hard-hitting, radical, and fun podcast we look at secular post-, non-, un- Buddhism, Vajrayana, nondual Hindu Tantra, philosophy, the neuroscience of the sense of self, neurofeedback and the consciousness hacking movement, aspects of artificial intelligence, entheogens, and much more.If you’re looking for fresh directions, free from dogma and conformism, think of the Deconstructing Yourself podcast as the radical cafe where you can hear from the most interesting luminaries either from the outside edges of dharma, or a fresh take from more traditional teachers. If you’re interested in more, check out the Deconstructing Yourself website at https://deconstructingyourself.com.
A Conversation with Wystan
Host Michael Taft interviews meditation teacher Wystan about teaching awakening outside a strict lineage framework, cultural translation of Buddhist practice, why awakening does not “come with a Buddhist label,” the tension between preserving traditional forms and adapting them for modern students, devotion as a powerful but often avoided dimension of practice, the heartbreak of compassion as barriers of separateness break down, the importance of turning toward suffering rather than distracting from it, gratitude and forgiveness as possible “neo-Brahmaviharas,” why shamatha and vipashyana training can prepare students for more direct nondual practices, and Wystan’s encouragement that awakening is real, possible, and worth pursuing. Wystan is a meditation teacher threading together influences from training in Theravada, Zen, Vajrayana, Dzogchen, and Shinzen Young's systematic secular approach in service of awakening. Learn more at https://www.wystantbs.com/ See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
Apr 28
35 min
Michael Taft Interviewed by Pranab
Host Michael Taft is interviewed by Pranab Sachidanandan about Michael's Stack Model for deconstructing sensory experience, his "adapter kit" for accessing nondual Vajrayana methods without years of preliminaries, why mantra and visualization are legitimate samadhi tools, how depth of practice maps across the sense gates, a chronic pain patient on a morphine pump who found relief through meditation, the humanities as qualia training, why the "Buddha industrial complex" leaves out people who don't fit a single tradition, and the power of building sangha outside it.
Feb 7
33 min
The Power of the Heart with Stephen Snyder
Host Michael Taft speaks with Stephen Snyder Sensei about the two “missing” brahmaviharas, Innate Goodness practice, heart wisdom vs. mind wisdom, the magic of the “group heart”, the paradox of the Heart Sutra, learning to become receptive, God and the nondual, entities, bodhisattvas, deities, the three types of forgiveness, and the “terrible importance” of heart-based practice. Stephen Mugen Snyder, Sensei began practicing daily meditation in 1976. Since then, he has studied Buddhism extensively—investigating and engaging in Zen, Tibetan, Theravada, and Western non-dual traditions. He was authorized to teach in the Theravada Buddhist tradition in 2007 and the Zen Buddhist schools of Soto and Rinzai in 2022. Stephen is a senior student of Roshi Mark Sando Mininberg and a transmitted teacher in the White Plum Asanga—the body of teachers in the Maezumi-roshi lineage. Stephen is the author of many books, including Trust in Awakening, Demystifying Awakening and Buddha’s Heart.  You can support the creation of future episodes of this podcast by contributing through Patreon. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
Jan 29
45 min
Chasing the Serpent’s Tail with Sravana Borkataky-Varma and Anya Foxen
Join host Michael Taft as he talks with Sravana Borkataky-Varma and Anya Foxen about the wild history of Kundalini—from it’s ancient Tantric roots to modern global yoga culture—including subtle-body maps, spontaneous awakenings, and so-called “Kundalini syndromes.” They explore how different traditions define the serpent power, when experiences become breakdowns or breakthroughs, the role of teachers and lineages, and why “energy” can’t be reduced to either neuroscience or fantasy. Along the way they dive into siddhis, the imaginal realm, goddess-centered practice, and what actually changes in your life and psyche when this mysterious force wakes up. Sravana Borkataky-Varma specializes in Hindu traditions, in particular, she delves into topics such as esoteric rituals and bodily concepts, especially in relation to Hindu śākta tantra traditions, often referred to as goddess tantra. She adopts a research methodology that blends social anthropology—examined from an outside perspective—with elements of reflexive autoethnography that reflect her personal experiences. As an educator, she holds the position of Instructional Assistant Professor at the University of Houston. She has formerly taught at Harvard Divinity School, Rice University, to name a few. Sravana is committed to building communities that bring together individuals from various religious backgrounds who aspire to lead lives marked by kindness and compassion. The Serpent's Tale: Kuṇḍalinī, Yoga, and the History of an Experience, Embodied Pedagogies in the Study of Religion: Transforming the Classroom, are two of her recent books, among many other books and articles. More information about Sravana can be found on her website, https://sravanaspeaks.com/ Anya Foxen is a historian and comparativist scholar of religion. She is currently an Associate Professor of Religious Studies at California Polytechnic State University, San Luis Obispo, as well as a Research Associate at the Center for the Study of World Religions at Harvard University. Her scholarly research focuses on the intersection of South Asian yogic and tantric traditions with Western esotericism and metaphysical spiritualities. She is the author of four books, including Inhaling Spirit: Harmonialism, Orientalism, and the Western Roots of Modern Yoga, and, most recently, The Serpent’s Tale: Kuṇḍalinī, Yoga, and the History of an Experience. She is also a teacher and long-time practitioner of yoga. Learn more about Anya at https://www.anyafoxen.com/ You can support the creation of future episodes of this podcast by contributing through Patreon. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
Dec 2, 2025
50 min
Nonduality and the Ego with Jake Orthwein
Host Michael Taft talks with Jake Orthwein about the self as a construction, the distinction between no-self and emptiness, the crucial difference between having a functional ego and being identified with it, psychedelics and meditation and ego dissolution, the Buddha-nature vs. the True Self, dereification vs. defabrication, Taft’s distinction of nondual one vs. nondual two, and the importance of a healthy ego.
Sep 21, 2025
1 hr 2 min
Talking about Deity Yoga with Peter McEwen
Host Michael Taft talks with meditation coach Peter McEwen about devotion in meditation practice, the need for stability in groundlessness, the ontological status of deities, how to handle formless panic, the magical matrix, and the lasting power and beauty of deity yoga in the Vajrayana tradition.
Aug 29, 2025
55 min
Talking about Dark Retreat, Part 2 with Andrew Holecek
Host Michael Taft continues his conversation with with Andrew Holecek about the transformative practice of Dark Retreat; the reasons behind the recent surge of interest in darkness practices; its relationship to the feminine principle and as an antidote to runaway patriarchy; the three “tracks” or “schools” of dark retreat in Tibetan Vajrayana: Kalachakra, Nyingma, and Bön; the power of darkness for working with fear, fear of death, projections; fear as a sign that you're close to the truth, and hints for integration post darkness.
Aug 1, 2025
1 hr 12 min
A Conversation with David Godman
Host Michael Taft talks with author David Godman about the sage Ramana Maharshi and his nondual view of the world, whether he considered taking sannyasa (renunciation) to be necessary to achieve awakening, the power of the physical presence of the guru, Sri Ramana's seemingly miraculous learning of Sanskrit, an introduction to Lakshmana Swami—a very advanced student of Ramana, with whom David Godman sat in the 1970s and 80s, Tamil poetry of awakening, and—in a surprising reveal—David Godman endorses a new jnani who lives in Tiruvannamalai.
Jun 19, 2025
1 hr 39 min
Talking about Dark Retreat, with Andrew Holecek
Host Michael Taft speaks with Andrew Holecek about the transformative practice of Dark Retreat, how the mind “falls into itself,” light as obfuscator, the revelation of the construction of reality, the power—and very real dangers—of Dark Retreat, ways to begin the practice of Dark Retreat, nondual view, Andrew’s own journey into this practice, and the “collision with the infinite.”
May 11, 2025
1 hr 24 min
Sanity and Sainthood, with Dr. Tucker Peck
Host Michael Taft speaks with meditation teacher, clinical psychologist, and author Dr. Tucker Peck about the the difference between developing a clear understanding of how your psychology works and feeling just how you want to feel all the time; the importance of focusing on mental process verses mental content, his practical definitions of sanity and sainthood, his three-stage model of meditation, and what it’s like after years of daily meditation practice.
Apr 18, 2025
44 min
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