Dateable: Your insider's look into modern dating
Dateable: Your insider's look into modern dating
Yue Xu and Julie Krafchick | Dating & Relationship Podcast hosts
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Verbal abuse and dating
I’m learning so many useful tips on dating from your show! Thanks for your objectivity and helpful advice. My question; I’ve been dating my partner for close to two years and I’m concerned about his yelling. He typically has unusually loud outbursts for road rage and he often screams at his dogs for what I consider silly stuff. Case in point dog is barking at birds and got screamed at to shut up.. ouch 😭 He has never screamed at me directly, however I’m very concerned about his lack of regulation. How can I navigate this path. I consider my partner to be otherwise reasonable. Help!
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Di-exploror
Best dating podcast
Started listening to this podcast on walks to dates with new people and truly helped get into the right mindset! Went on dozens of dates in SF that went nowhere and this podcast has helped me realize that it was all part of the process and, with a couple adjustments, dating has become quite fun
SamFenster
Love these girls!
I am in a relationship, but have found that I can relate to most topics. Honestly the episodes are to short with way too many adds. It’s really hard to listen when you have to stop what your doing & constantly fast forward through the adds. Besides all that, I find most of the topics very relatable, or at least entertaining. It’s time to start doing tours girls! They need to fill us in more on what happens in their lives & also have their partners on the pod! SOMEONE PLEASE TEACH JULIE HOW TO SAY EXACTLY! This is literally one of the most annoying things I’ve ever heard.
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Rachsess
Helpful advice
I’m a fairly new listener and enjoy your podcast. I would love to hear more about dating from the perspective of people are of a different generation than you. For example, some of us who dated before digital dating find the new way to date unnatural. It feels like an interview process. I personally struggle with the speed at which men want to move to sex and how to make this progression easier and more natural
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Chicago Jam
Too many ads
16 minute podcast with >9 minutes of ads. Annoying
JTF1100
Down to earth and practical advice.
I get so much from the podcast. It gives me hope. 💘
tlv2pdx
My emotional support show!
As an almost 34 yo female with limited dating experience and mostly married friends, I love listening to dateable to remind myself that I’m not alone in my experience! Yue and Julie give me the courage to put myself out there and to try to overcome that voice in my head telling me it’s too late to find love! Silly question for you both. I recently had a 2nd date with someone that was going well… until he forgot my name! We were bowling and he typed a totally different name into the computer for me. I obviously corrected him, but couldn’t shake that him calling me the wrong name gave me major “ick” factor. What do you think of the “ick?” Is it something you can get over?
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cgc 17
A newbie dater’s dream podcast!
As an inexperienced dater, listening to Dateable has been such an eye-opening experience. Listening to Julie and Yue chat is a highlight of my commute, since it always feels a chat with friends. The advice they give has been so helpful in contextualizing my past experiences and making me feel ready to take on the dating world. That said, I do have a question for you! At 27 years old, I’ve never had a long term relationship, or really entered the dating scene at all save for one hinge date a year ago. I never cared that much about my love life until that dreaded quarter life crisis, and though I know I’m still very young, it’s hard not to feel like I’m behind in life. I’m also very rejection avoidant due to some experiences in my younger life, which makes it hard for me to put myself out there, especially on dating apps. I find it particularly difficult to chat with people over text as it’s not a skill I have developed nor something I particularly enjoy. How would you suggest I overcome this fear of rejection/fear of dating apps? I’d like to rip the bandaid off and just get some of the awkward first experience over with, but it’s easier said than done.
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rin wu
Great, first impression
Searching for an insightful podcast about dating, I find over 95% to be inefficient with my listening time. This one gets to the meat of the program swiftly and delivers thoughtful information in an organized, digestible way. On my first listen here, I consider my time well spent. The eloquent host clearly explained her ideas which happened to provoke me to give serious thought to my own status and to think about how to learn the most possible about the true status of ladies I may date. This topic is compelling, original, and quite useful. I'm subscribing and looking forward to more. Where can I contribute questions or suggestions for topics? I do have a unique dating obstacle which may open a larger topic for listeners about best practices / ethics in online dating. I've conducted some informal research I'd like to share for your consideration and comment. Glad I found the show. Truly single now, after 20 years of marriage. RB
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light be
So Helpful
I’ve been listening to Dateable for about a year. It has really helped me (and all my friends) work through some of the common pitfalls and think through our decisions when it comes to dating. I’m at a place, where I’ve learned to say “No.” to things that don’t feel right, where I used to entertain possible relationships for too long when I knew something was off. I’m in a position now where I have some really great partnership options, and my compatibility meter is going “check check check,” but I’m not sure if I’m attracted enough, mostly because I can find these people attractive in their own ways, but I still feel like I’m holding back or something, and that I’m not sure. I’m not sure if my anxiety is a clue that I should keep with the no train until I find someone for whom I feel completely relaxed — OR — if I should give these great options a try and if after some time it’s not feeling right or enough, than I can step out. It’s like I feel like I have to choose whether this person is “right” for me or not after a few dates. Should I give it more time? Am I crazy for thinking I could be certain about someone in such a short period of time?
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Mrs. Bird
Insightful, Informative, Hilarious and Relative
This podcast is by far one of my favorites for navigating the world of dating and relationships. The insight, perspective, and advice are relatable, practical, and most importantly useful. Regardless of your relationship status, age, gender and lifestyle, there’s an insurmountable amount of advice and insight you can learn by listening. I love how a part of our lives we take so serious can be discussed with humility, candor and a sense of light heartedness reminding us that yes, dating is hard but if you take the time to self reflect, learn from others, and realize you’re not alone in the journey, successful relationships are actually achievable! Please keep posting, ladies! You guys are the best and so enjoyable to listen to!
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Hdj42
My favorite podcast, and not just for dating!
These two gals are hilarious and an amazing resource for learning and perspective when it comes to dating, life, meeting people… I look forward to listening to every episode! I find that when I listen in, I am reminded of why I’m dating the first place, what I want out of it, and how I want to show up when I’m in it. It’s been incredibly supportive over the past year for me personally as I’ve been on and off dating apps; their perspective has brought me back from the feelings of frustration and has brought back the excitement and joy that can come from meeting new people.
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FoolishMortal33
Thank you Yue and Julie!
I’ve been listening to this podcast for over a year now and it’s completely changed the way I view dating and relationships. I appreciate all your insights and the guests that you bring on. I love learning about different dating perspectives and challenging my own biases around relationships. Dating used to be so daunting and there was always a sense of dread around going on dates. I would settle for people that weren’t aligned with me, but because of this podcast, I feel so more at peace with myself and confident in the qualities I’m looking for in a partner. I can’t wait to see what episodes 2024 brings!
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blazerfan7
Thank you for answering my question!
I found the recent Brunch Talk ep. on communication post break up to be insightful. I really appreciate the hosts’ support. Post break up navigation gets less painful with time.
Becky Schoellkopf
Brunchtalk question
Great show. Question: How do I let myself be more feminine as I prepare to start dating again? For more context: I’ve had to have a lot of masculine energy my whole life as I’ve navigated difficult situations. Now, I’m ready to let myself be feminine as I prepare to re-enter the dating scene. How can I embrace and grow this energy?
purple nails curled hair
THANK YOU
I discovered these incredible humans through an episode of Reimagine Love. Since I have devoured Exit Interview and am now thoroughly enjoying Dateable. I have felt seen, validated, and have learned so much about myself since listening and feel much more prepared to tackle modern dating in a loving and relational way. If you’re looking for all of the above, I highly suggest a listen, and honoring whatever you take away 💙
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rootsandrust
Dateable
A favorite podcast, The shows are funny, realistic and hopeful.
happy2practice
Wonderful Stumble-Upon
Not sure how I heard about this one but so glad I did! Great balance of chill vibes and informed advice. WFH life, so I listen to a LOT of podcasts. Happy to add this to my rotation. Thanks, ladies!
Lovely Lady Lydia
Great energy!
Love this podcast… very relatable.
Uma B.
Thankful for Julie, Yue and this podcast!
I love this podcast!! Julie & Yue bring such a great perspective to modern dating and one that feels empowering and not like you have to follow all these strict rules that other “experts” recommend. I’ve been listening since 2020 and this podcast has helped me navigate everything from my first long-term romantic relationship to the ending of that relationship (I think I listened to the “Should I leave a relationship that’s good but not great” episode at least 5 times) to learning how to embrace my singleness while also staying dateable. I feel like Julie & Yue are my friends and my biggest cheerleaders as I navigate the ups and downs of dating and I’m so thankful I found them!
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BetsyG34
Fun and informative
Such a great podcast. I really enjoy listening to the hosts and guests. 😁
JenfromMass
Dateable gave me G.A.M.E.
I owe these ladies a 5 star review. They gave me Guidance-Attention-Motivation- Education when it came to dating. How to navigate the apps, philosophy about what makes a good match, and so much more that I took to heart. And just when I thought it couldn’t get better, they dropped The Exit Interview where they deconstructed dates/ short relationships people had. Enlightening on so many levels. Thank you!
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Dununba 6
Down to earth & approachable
I’ve listened to many dating & relationship podcasts over the years. As a 35 year old woman, I wish I found this podcast earlier in my dating journey. Although I’m in a LTR now, I find Julie & Yu’s insight so humble and honest. I’ve found other hosts hard to relate to in terms of age or mindset around dating, and I really appreciate their unpretentious and authentic feedback. They feel like the kind of podcast hosts you can actually envision getting a meal with and laughing the night away.
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Telicia R
Great podcast
One of my favorite podcasts that I tune into every week. Whether you’re single, dating, or in a relationship, you can learn and take away helpful insights and tips for all manner of relating to others. I appreciate how open-minded and supportive Julie and Yue are exploring topics and giving space for diverse perspectives. Some of my favorite episodes have been related to topics that aren’t readily applicable to my vanilla (sometimes with hot honey) life. Thank you for all of the great episodes over many years! Looking forward to listening more and staying dateable. :)
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AllibeezNYC
Review & question
Hi Yue & Julie. I so appreciate your podcast. When I am in a dip with dating (or even on a high), I pop on your show and get a hit of rejuvenation. I feel less alone in this modern, wild world of dating (and at 50, I’ve been on this journey for over three decades). Question for you: how would you recommend letting someone (in my case, cis het men) know on a first date, in real time, that they are talking more than I prefer? I’m struggling with what appears to be a common theme of over-talking and sometimes trauma dumping…and limited (or no) curiosity in me (and I leave the date exhausted). I’m curious how you would advise me & others on this topic. Thanks deeply to you both: keep being awesome. Tonja
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Feedbackfromtonja
Congratulations?
I did not want to date again. I was happy and fulfilled in every aspect of my life. 56 years old, a few “meh” situationships and one almost perfect relationship after a late-in-life divorce….I’d decided dating was not worth the drama. Found Dateable via Exit Interview (FASCINATING, btw, so juicy!) and fast forward almost a year…..I signed up for my first OLD account and have 2 dates in my first week out! Best part is, I’m going into this with the BEST attitude (you ladies have given me so much inspiration) and plan to be 1) present in the moment, 2) hopeful, 3) non-judgemental, 4) realistic and resilient if things don’t work out! Wish me luck!
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genowee
Always informative and interesting!
I look forward to each episode.
informed podcast listener
Funny and real
I’m a new listener and am now a fan! It’s cool to hear perspectives from a couple of strong ladies. Keep it up!!
beatlesgerlie
So informative!
I really wish I had this podcast in my life sooner. I’m learning so much and it’s taking a lot of the mystery out of dating, which is something I’ve always felt naïve about. It’s even inspired me to attempt dating again after I had given up.
Amy Sloan
Amazing Show!! ❤️
This is one of the most insightful shows I’ve eve listen to about dating!! Julie and Yue, and the community, are amazing. Top-notch and highly recommend. 💯 😊 Also… It’s only awkward if you make it awkward 😉
mikeeey1234
New dating perspectives
This podcast is my favorite because it gives so much helpful perspective when it comes to relationships. I’m at a stage in life where all friends are married with young kids and I miss having friends that I externally process all the ups and downs of dating. This podcast is like having that friend group with so many different perspectives and also focused on individual self-growth.
Dateable obsessed
Helping a Broken heart
Stumbled upon this podcast and been listening to old episodes as well because these ladies have helped heal my heart.
Harm09
Request For New Relationship Advice
Over the past 1-2 years I have been listening to every episode you guys put out. I figured that if I just listen and let these new perspectives in, that I would eventually gain a healthier mindset around dating and self-love. And I’m thrilled to say that I am now in a wonderful relationship! Thank you both very much. Now that I am in a relationship though, I am encountering new topics that I would love your expertise on. Would you guys consider peppering in some episodes on managing a new relationship? For example, time management, shifting friendships, when to introduce to family, etc.
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cpcrocks
Thank you!
You all are awesome and so helpful! Dating can be difficult and your stories and insights have been invaluable as I navigate a new boyfriend!
caki diehl
Great podcast for someone new to dating
I’m newly separated after being married for 10 years (plus 3 children) and have never dated. I just fell into relationships (two of them, including my ex, after drunkenly making out at a bar and realizing we were really into each other), and have only been in 2 real relationships. I started listening to Dateable because of the fact that I know nothing about dating. I feel like it’s filled in a lot of gaps for me, and helped prepare me for the dates I’ve been on which were with men with a lot of dating experience.
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ForestMaven
Informative and On Target with Today's Daters
Thanks for a great podcast. I guess since I was a professional photograher in my prior life (working years) I am apalled by the totally unflattering photos both men and women post on apps. I've gently offered to photograph some of the women with no strings or fee. One accepted. After posting her new images, she immediately went from zero dates to five. And found love...no not me. Yes, we should not base our selections on the photos alone, but sadly most men do just that. Guess I really don't have a question other than can you please remind everyone of the importances of a current, non bathroom selfie, individual... no groups, no sunglasses, or fish.. or any other dead animal photos. Again, great Dateable podcast and love the 'quickies' .. .bunch talk. David
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David McClellan
I love this podcast.
Hi, I would like to make a request on this topic or idk if it would be considered a topic. Why do exes leave breadcrumbs and talk badly about their current partner. In my case I broke up with my ex last year around this time. We were long together, I left because it just felt like I was his mom, having to clean and cook after him and all he would do was play video games. I mean i love the guy but I just don’t think a relationship should feel like that. I work 4 days a week but I work 10 hour shifts the bare minimum was to have dinner since he got home before me . Anyway, he begged me to go back but I wanted to go back to school and he wasn’t supporting me with that. Prior to me breaking up we had a big argument where he said we were ready for marriage and then he said I was going to propose this December. In November he started talking to his ex from high school and he was still begging me to get back until March and at that time I felt like I wanted to give him a chance again but he had already moved in with her, would secretly visit me after a terrible accident I had. Tell me how much he loves me and he’s force to be with her because he had a trip planned with her and once they came back he would break up with her. That happen and he still didn’t break up but I started dating and he came back saying he’s not okay with me dating and that’s why he can’t leave her because he thinks I would walk out on him. Saw him last week and he was upset that I’m taking things to the next level with the guy I’m seeing. I don’t have my ex on social media but my profile was public would constantly would watch my stories, I blocked him and would create new profiles to see what I was up to .
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Mimi1240
Great podcast with creative content
I like hearing all the different perspectives that Dateable showcases in each episode. S17E7 is a great example of this. I also appreciate that the hosts highlight some of their own dating experience. A great, human-centric approach to dating.
pthesing
Loved Rory!
Loved the episode with Rory! It was vulnerable, informative & fun! Great work!
dont follow me im lost
Pretty good overall, some eps are really great
Not a current dater but always interested in anything about relationships and this can often hit the spot with good guests and good interviewing. Julie might need some Flonase tho; she always sounds congested.
Mavis See
Sunday’s Brunch Talk- tell them you are their first date
Hey long-time listener, but never have written in. I have to say I was so disturbed from Sunday’s brunch talk and not telling them this is your first date. I think it would be such an interesting topic to discuss in greater depth. I have been many guys first dates which once I find that out on the date sometimes it puts me in the mindset that oh this guy is not going to be ready for anything. I did date a guy for a while that I was but he had taken a yr off from dating from his marriage ending. It is an interesting concept. Chicken or the egg? Before it bothered me and make me sad when I found out. But now, I live in reality 😂 and I would go to have a good time but that is from lots of work on myself and being single for 4 yrs. Anyway, love the pod and wanted to share.
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erin_unpacked
A crucial piece of my self development
I thank these ladies for giving a gender neutral and sociological based answer to dating, as well as introducing me to other podcasts through their hosts such as Connor Beaton Keep it up My brunch talk question is, is a lack of experience in a guy a turn off? For context, 26m on the autistic spectrum
Rahīm
Love the podcast!
As someone who is going through a separation. This podcast has help me not feel alone. It gives you a different perspective on life. Highly recommend for people to listen to it!
Dallaspride
Always great, diverse content
I have Yun and Julie to thank for starting my journey into more mindful dating and how to be a better partner. I’ve listened to their podcast for over two years and I am always impressed by how thoughtful and sincere they are. I especially love #brunchtalk so I have an idea for a topic: moving in with your partner. I am a 39 year old woman and am moving in with my boyfriend of 1.5 years tomorrow. I have never lived with a partner before and haven’t had a roommate since I lived with my twin sister in college 17 years ago. He’s 43 and also hasn’t lived with a partner before either. I’m excited to start a new chapter of our relationship and life together. My anxiety is kicking in high gear now because I know I can be rigid. I’ve only known one way of living solo for the past 17 years. I want to be flexible and want to learn to compromise but I tend to get set in the ways I envision things in terms of decor, meals or even cleaning (for lack of a better word, I have control freak tendencies). Would love to hear a discussion about this since Julie has mentioned moving in with her partner recently.
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CaseyAliCee
Fun, thoughtful and open-minded
Really enjoy listening to the range of topics that are focused on dating but also relatable regardless if you’re in a relationship or not. I really appreciate how open the hosts are about how individual relationships really are, and they have NO JUDGEMENT about how anyone goes about creating the relationship that works best for them. Love it !
LeighLovesDateable
Light, Fun and Thought-Provoking
This is one of those podcasts that I always listen to as soon as it comes out. You know how sometimes you’re not in the mood for a certain podcast? I’m always in the mood to hear from Julie and Yue, they just have the perfect balance of deep and fun, and they’re just likable people! Love their other show, Exit Interview, too!
TRBL816
Relatable
What a great podcast! Very relatable. I appreciate the honesty and advice :) @dating_is_savage
kbm7777777
Love the show!🫶🏼
I can’t tell you how many times I have shared your show with friends and family – thank you for your thoughtful content, and please keep it coming! Really enjoyed this most recent episode with Ken Page and *love* the concept of the core gift/wound matrix. I’d say one of my core gifts is empathy, with the wound being lack of boundaries/people-pleasing. I have gotten so much better over the years and it is a gift I continue to work on honoring and a wound I continue to work on healing.❤️‍🩹
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55 game player
So much more than a dating podcast
These ladies are doing the work live, have learned so much from seeing their growth. Stay strong and inspiring Julie and Yue! ❤️
Niyati
Love Love Love
This podcast is amazing; it has been so helpful. Sincere thanks to you both
It’s Mel
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