On this episode grooming, power abuse, and the freeze response that kept me alive. The savior teacher who turns villain at night. The singer who sings in my ear. The one who makes me forget he’s dangerous because the help felt real. Predators know their prey. Poverty, no bio father, born to a teenage mom, broken home. Check, check, check, check. I was a walking target. At 15, I was homeless, no contact with my mother, living out of sink-washed T-shirts at my grandmother’s, attending an altern...
Jan 21
7 min
In this episode, I explore the caged bird’s song, realizing my strength was never a choice but a survival instinct. People praise how I endure, but I never had options like leaving my kids or falling into addiction. I chose to sing, turning pain into purpose. My capacity to love, to try again, to find silver linings, once felt like a curse, making me angry at endless tests. Losing my son became my greatest lesson, teaching me to listen before chaos, to weave warmth from ashes. I built my own ...
Nov 8, 2025
6 min
In this heartfelt episode of Season 2, I share the chaos of losing my business and money, raising three kids while terrified as a new manager. Then I met Desi, whose words, “We don’t have to live like this,” stopped me cold, offering a choice I never saw growing up in a world where you just survive. Her poise, like a steady trunk, showed me I could walk away from the fire. She taught me to listen, to ask questions like “Help me understand,” and to see beyond my anxiety through books like Radi...
Oct 18, 2025
6 min
In this opening to season two, I dive into the heart-wrenching night my ex-husband assaulted me in our home, ignoring my desperate pleas to stop as he forced himself on me. The weight of childhood pain, where I learned to silence my voice, resurfaced as I froze, shielding my sleeping kids from the truth. His lingering shadow, watching me crumble, forced me to face my silenced voice and the roots that let me down, my mom walking away, caught in her own anger, leaving me without a safe space. I...
Oct 10, 2025
10 min
In this season finale, I dive deep into the soul-crushing betrayal that unfolded with DC, a friend I held close to my heart, whose whispered “I love you” turned into a hollow lie as he forced himself on me . That night didn’t just deepen the loss of my voice; it became a mirror forcing me to confront my own instincts, questioning why I failed to trust my choices and decisions when danger loomed. The guilt that weighed me down stemmed from childhood encounters with cousins and O, where I didn’...
Aug 9, 2025
8 min
In this episode, I recount opening the door to sheriff’s officers as a child, facing eviction. We sat on the curb, desperately waiting for help.Later we moved to a dissembled community in Chicago.My mom’s absence left me vulnerable, sent to the store where a man preyed on me, starting with “help in the back” and escalating to touching my feet, lifting my shirt, dropping my pants. I froze, lost my voice, wearing baggy clothes to hide, rejecting pink for black, overwhelmed by touch. Signs went ...
Aug 5, 2025
7 min
In this episode, I confront the anger that consumed me after giving birth, staring in the mirror at a woman who felt weak for not saying no , risking her baby’s life. I reflect on the mental escape during abuse, the silence that let him get away with it, and the shame of keeping peace. Through tears, I unpack pretending hurt was anger, fearing vulnerability in a world with no room for pain. I share how reading and driving over a bridge to meet Charlamagne tha God, sparked my escape. He said j...
Jul 15, 2025
10 min
In this episode, I unravel the storm of 2017, starting with my son’s birth by C-section, a fragile three pounds, fighting in the NICU until he passed at home in May. By July, pregnant again, I buried my shame and rage, questioning God, terrified of losing another. Bed rest and weekly shots marked my anxious days, but an ex-husband’s insistence led to a reckless Thanksgiving night, forcing an emergency C-section less than ten months later, chaotic and risky. She arrived to “Here Comes the Sun,...
Jul 8, 2025
10 min
In this deeply personal episode, I bare the unseen battle of birthing twins in a tub at home, a secret I’ve carried in silence. Discovering my pregnancy with lifeless twins after a quiet ultrasound, I hid my grief while bartending, pacing through labor until delivering them, and fainting from blood loss. The weight of losing Infinite and Divine crushed me, yet I showed up daily, masking my pain. Through tears, I reflect on , feeling like a failure despite my body’s strength. No more try...
Jun 30, 2025
11 min
In this episode, I wrestle with the parts of me no one sees the silent struggle of no motivation and paralysis when faced with choice. Rooted in past trauma, I’ve lived in survival mode, moving only when the fire’s under me, but I’m tired of the chaos. Through tears, I unpack how my mother’s roots and ex-husband’s control shaped this freeze, pushing me to reclaim my voice. I reflect on rare days with my kids, fighting to show up as myself, not a perfect mom. There’s no easy fix, just the mess...
Jun 27, 2025
13 min
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