Please visit the new COMA radio [clone] site at: http://comacopied.podomatic.com/ Since I've pretty much run out of storage space here, I created the new site which is updated much more frequently. It can be found and downloaded in iTunes as well.

Thomas Newman - Any Other Name 4.9.09 : M If you were still here. Walking within the vicinity of my ribcage. Today would have been a warm beautiful day. Today we'd have talked about horses always having an appetite. Easter-themed smiley cookies. And how inspiring it must have been when my grandfather drove cross-country from California to Pennsylvania with a parrot named Petey keeping him company the entire way. I miss your comfortable company. 4.9.09 : M It's a sharp sentimental sadness when you catch yourself backstroking through pools and pools of memories. As if it weren't a common daily occurence that somehow shook-down surprised you. I always think of you. Because it's hard to wrap my heart around these 3 long years. Sometimes seeming short. Most often times it's unbelievably overwhelming to think of you being gone so long. Longing for that infinitely-elusive hug. A laughter and a smile that are both so dearly missed. How I miss you, M. 4.9.09 : still M To think that the cancer was even capable of causing chaos in your body's courageous components. Will always be beyond belief. It wasn't fair that your body lost bits and bags and boxes of it's strength. It wasn't fair that it was you. It wasn't fair that you died that day. I wish you were here. I wish your lungs were launching laughter into this room. I wish for the only one that could ever be you. 4.10.09 : M My feelings go without saying.

State Radio - Keepsake Joseph Arthur - Exhausted Puddle Of Mudd - Blurry Sneaker Pimps - Walk The Rain Dave Matthews - Dreaming Tree Bjork - All Is Full Of Love 7.10.08 : love you dad It's 2:05p and I've littered my mind with nostalgia and alcohol. I've been choking on a broken heart since that morning's 6:06a. I don't know what to do with myself. I've been wrapped in a numb haze that has nothing better to do than keep me company with it's consistency. I feel alone and unguided. My grandfather is gone and I don't know how to put my own two feet together and keep moving through this draining disaster. How do you accept this much of a magnified loss. How do you accept the loss of life that's been applied to the strongest branch of your family tree. I don't know how to feel what I want to feel or say what I want to say. I'm a functional wreck. I've been carrying his picture in my pocket for days and days. I've had his Navy bracelet wrapped around my wrist for 3+ weeks. I've securely held him in my eyesight for 30 straight years and it's not enough. It's never enough. I need more. I need so much fucking more. I need more of my grandfather's calmly-carved presence. I need his laughter. I need the sound of his chest when it's dispelling his chest full of coughs. No one can come close to this contagious France at his brilliantly-bestowed best. No one can make his goodbye any easier.

Playlist : Radiohead - Videotape Moby - Inside Peter Gabriel - I Grieve Moby - Everloving Tool - Wings For Marie, Pt. 1 Radiohead - Videotape : When I'm at the pearly gates This'll be on my videotape My videotape When Mephistopheles is just beneath And he's reaching up to grab me This is one for the good days And I have it all here In red blue green In red blue green And you are my center when I spin away Out of control on videotape On videotape On videotape This is my way of saying goodbye Because I can't do it face to face I'm talking to you from... No matter what happens now You shouldn't be afraid Because I know today has been The most perfect day I've ever seen Peter Gabriel - I Grieve : It was only one hour ago It was all so different then There’s nothing yet has really sunk in Looks like it always did This flesh and bone Is just the way that we are tied in Now there's no one home I grieve for you You leave me It’s so hard to move on Still loving what's gone they say life carries on they say life carries on and on and on and on The news that truly shocks is the empty, empty page While the final rattle rocks its empty, empty cage And I can't handle this I grieve for you You leave me Let it out and move on Missing what's gone They say life carries on They say life carries on and on and on Life carries on In the people I meet In everyone that's out on the street In all the dogs and cats In the flies and rats In the rot and the rust In the ashes and the dust Life carries on and on and on and on Life carries on and on and on It’s just the car that we ride in The home we reside in The face that we hide in The way we are tied in Life carries on and on and on and on Life carries on and on and on Did I dream this belief Or did I believe this dream Now I can find relief I grieve Tool - Wings For Marie - Part 1 : You believed You believed in moments none could see You believed in me A passionate spirit Uncompromise Boundless and open A light in your eyes that Could end all lies Vacant, broken Fell at the hands of those movements that I wouldn't see Cause it was you who prayed for me, so What have I done to be a son to an angel? What have I done to be worthy? Daylight dims leaving cold fluorescence Difficult to see you in this light Please forgive this selfish question, but What am I to say to all these ghouls tonight? She never told a lie Well might've told a lie But never lived one Didn’t have a life Didn’t have a life But surely saved one See? I'm alright, now It’s time for us to let you go 4.5.08 : ... You've been breaking my heart more-so than usual lately. Can I say that and not worry about being victimized by vulnerability? I question this because it is a question. The tears start to splish-splash in the back of my throat when I think of all of the missing face-to-face time. Why does life hand out cheat cards when no one is ever interested in accepting them. The length of your legacy was unfairly snatched short. I've remembered every square inch of your face. With a welcoming smile constantly plastered between your compassionate sidewalk-chalked cheek bones. How could I ever forget a significance such as you. I rhetorically question that one too. Because it is a question. You with your ever constant influenceable face. I'll forever remember your face. I remember the way it used to light up in those pre-cancer days. Getting hung up on the cancer. Because cancer has become my whole-hearted-heavily-hated enemy. But in an attempt to be honest. I barely ever think of the way you looked when it clung to you like a heavy apathetic-overcoat. When I think of you. I think of only you. 4.8.08 : aphex twins - stone in focus Sitting here with these oversized headphones slung atop these surpasingly-sad eardrums. You would have loved this song if you had heard it du(continued)

Finally... the 90's!! 001 - When In Rome - The Promise 002 - KWS - Please Don't Go 003 - Corona - Rhythm Of The Night 004 - London Beat - I've Been Thinking About You 005 - The Cure - Friday I'm In Love 006 - Suzanne Vega - Tom's Diner 007 - Boy George - The Crying Game 008 - Snap - Rhythm Is A Dancer 009 - Tori Amos - Little Earthquakes 010 - Go West - King Of Wishful Thinking 011 - B-52's - Rock Lobster 012 - George Michael - Father Figure 013 - Jon Secada - Just Another Day 014 - Tom Cochran - Life Is A Highway

001 - Lindsay Buckingham - Trouble 002 - Martika - Toy Soldiers 003 - The Police - King Of Pain 004 - John Waite - I Ain't Missing You At All 005 - Paul Young - Every Time You Go Away 006 - Steve Nicks - Silver Springs 007 - Alan Parsons Project - Eye In The Sky 008 - Belinda Carlisle - Heaven Is A Place On Earth 009 - Bon Jovi - Wanted Dead Or Alive 010 - Bryan Adams - Run To You 011 - Cyndi Lauper - True Colors 012 - Howard Jones - Things Can Only Get Better 013 - Jefferson Starship - Sarah 014 - Paula Abdul - Rush Rush 015 - Prince - When Doves Cry

Myspace : www.myspace.com/damndirtywest Youtube : www.youtube.com/fiiiiive05

This 80's mix is brought to you by the morning crew at McDowell's. "Look... Me and the McDonald's people got this little misunderstanding. See, they're McDonald's... I'm McDowell's. They got the Golden Arches, mine is the Golden Arcs. They got the Big Mac, I got the Big Mick. We both got two all-beef patties, special sauce, lettuce, cheese, pickles and onions, but their buns have sesame seeds. My buns have no seeds." [01] - COMA radio intro [02] - Steve Perry - Oh Sherrie [03] - Rockwell - Somebody's Watching Me [04] - Mike & The Mechanics - The Living Years [05] - Mr. Mister - Broken Wings [06] - Foreigner - Been Waiting For A Girl Like You [07] - Jefferson Starship - We Built This City [08] - John Waite - I Ain't Missing You At All [09] - Joy Division - Love Will Tear Us Apart [10] - Michael Jackson - Smooth Criminal [11] - Pat Benatar - Invincible [12] - Phil Collins - Do You Remember [13] - The Outfield - I Don't Wanna Lose Your Love Tonight [14] - Prince - I Would Die 4 U Myspace : www.myspace.com/damndirtywest Youtube : www.youtube.com/fiiiiive05

This 80's mix is brought to you by Johnny 5! xx] - Back to the Future II - Welcome to the Cafe 80's ** xx] - COMA Intro 01] - Billy Idol - Eyes Without A Face 02] - Thompson Twins - Hold Me Now xx] - Airplane - Don't Call Me Shirley ** 03] - The Cure - Love Song xx] - Young Frankenstein - I thought I told you ** 04] - Big Country - In A Big Country 05] - Journey - Faithfully 06] - Human League - Human 07] - Cory Hart - Never Surrender 08] - Crowded House - Don't Dream It's Over xx] - Spaceballs - I'm surrounded by assholes ** 10] - Survivor - High On You 11] - Real Life - Send Me An Angel xx] - Legend - We are all animals my lady ** 12] - Hall & Oates - Out Of Touch xx] - Ferris Bueller's Day Off - Bueller, Bueller, Bueller ** 13] - Johnny Hates Jazz - Shattered Dreams 14] - Journey - Seperate Ways 15] - Mike & The Mechanics - Silent Running xx] - Ghostbusters - I'm fuzzy on the whole good / bad thing ** 16] - Foreigner - I Want To Know What Love Is 17] - Richard Marx - Right Here Waiting xx] - Planes, Trains & Automobiles - You play with your balls alot ** 18] - The Police - If I Ever Lose My Faith In You 19] - The Cars - Drive xx] - Coming To America - Yes, yes, fuck you too! ** 20] - Simple Minds - Alive & Kicking xx] - Back To The Future - It was meant to be ** 21] - White Snake - Is This Love ** Denotes movie sound bite