
Priya Parker: The Art of Fighting
Priya Parker is a facilitator, strategic advisor, bestselling author of The Art of Gathering, and executive producer and host of the New York Times podcast, Together Apart. Trained in the field of conflict resolution, she has spent 20 years guiding leaders and groups through complicated conversations about community, identity, and vision at moments of transition. She is the author of the new book, The Art of Fighting: The Transformative Power of Conflict (Amazon, Bookshop)*.
Often we assume that good leaders and good teams don’t fight. In this conversation, Priya tells us that, “Fighting is not the death of community. It is its lifeblood.” We explore how to turn conflict into progress.
Key Points
Even experts who handle group conflict often find it challenging, fearful, and unsettling.
Becoming a durable, sustainable group does not happen without a fight.
One of the biggest myths that hold leaders back is that “good” people and “good” groups don’t fight.
There’s a seniority caveat to conflict. Leaders often confuse what needs to be felt with what needs to be said.
It’s a lie to believe that “if only” one thing hadn’t happened that conflict would not have occurred. If it wasn’t that, it would have been something else.
Milestones, transitions, schedule changes, and celebrations are often triggering events for conflict. Instead of thinking, “This is the worst timing,” expect conflict at these times.
Resources Mentioned
The Art of Fighting: The Transformative Power of Conflict by Priya Parker (Amazon, Bookshop)*
Interview Notes
Download my interview notes in PDF format (free membership required).
Related Episodes
How to Create Meaningful Gatherings, with Priya Parker (episode 395)
The Way Out of Major Conflict, with Amanda Ripley (episode 529)
How to Help Difficult Conversations Go Better, with Sheila Heen (episode 655)
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Sep 28
39 min

Sebastian Wernicke: Data Inspired
For over 20 years, Sebastian Wernicke has guided organizations around the world to harness the power of data and AI to achieve breakthrough transformation. His three acclaimed TED Talks have reached over 5 million viewers. He is the author of Data Inspired: Building an Organizational Culture of Inquiry for Lasting Transformation (Amazon, Bookshop)*.
We all have more access to data than ever. That means we should be making better decisions than we ever have before, yes? If only it were that simple. In this conversation, Sebastian and I explore how you can actually use all that data to make better decisions.
Key Points
Data initiatives don’t necessarily fail, but often do something worse: make your organization stay the same.
Better data does not automatically result in better decisions. An organization also needs the cultural maturity to be swayed by the data.
Nobody makes decisions that look like the logical decision-making processes we see in books. In addition, the emotions we put into decisions are actually critically helpful.
During uncertainty, more data tends to make us more uncertain. Once we’ve decided something, we tend to discount contrary data.
Decisions are rarely made entirely by one person and heavily influenced by the team or organization’s culture.
Leaders can help integrate helpful data by saying things like, “I’m looking for data to tell me where I am wrong.”
Bringing in structure such as written notes or memos before or at the start of meetings can help data be considered before we discount it.
Resources Mentioned
Data Inspired: Building an Organizational Culture of Inquiry for Lasting Transformation (Amazon, Bookshop)*
Interview Notes
Download my interview notes in PDF format (free membership required).
Related Episodes
How to Involve Stakeholders in Decisions, with Eric Pliner (episode 586)
How to Change People’s Minds, with Michael McQueen (episode 676) – contradictory data not swaying people
How to Lead Engaging Meetings, with Jess Britt (episode 721)
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Sep 21
39 min

Stephanie Evergreen: Build a Data Culture
Stephanie Evergreen is a data visualization and design expert. She has trained future data nerds worldwide through keynotes and workshops, for Fortune 500 clients like MasterCard and Facebook and mission-aligned clients like the United Nations, the Boys and Girls Club, AARP, and The Alaska Native Tribal Health Consortium. She has three books and a popular blog on data visualization.
Data: we’ve all got tons of access to it these days. But perhaps almost too much – how do we actually make sense of it and then communicate clearly with it? In this conversation, Stephanie and I explore how a leader can best use data to make their message land.
Key Points
Many of us are overwhelmed by access to data, but lots of leaders find that much of the data isn’t actionable for increasing performance.
Because dashboards attempt to answer many questions, they often result in doing a poor job of highlighting a key message or insight.
Instead of showing every data point you’ve ever collected, use smart formatting to highlight the single thing your team needs to know.
Decide in advance what the key message of a slide, chart, or presentation should be. Then, design for that clear message.
Answer the burning question that your audience is likely asking.
Leaders set the tone for transparency with data that isn’t good news. Encourage and reward hearing the honest story to establish a culture where truth is shared and addressed.
Resources Mentioned
Build a Data Culture by Stephanie Evergreen
Why Data-Packed Meetings Miss the Mark (And What to Do About It) by Stephanie Evergreen
Related Episodes
Performance Measurement That Gets Results, with Stacey Barr (episode 419)
The Way to Influence Executives, with Nancy Duarte (episode 450)
How to Respond When You Don’t Have Resources, with Laura West (episode 699)
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Sep 14
34 min

Today is the FINAL day to apply for the Coaching for Leaders Academy.
Are you at an inflection point? Apply to the Academy by the of the day today, Friday, September 11th.
Sep 11
47 sec

Dave shares four words that detail what’s different about leaders who consistently get better – and even THRIVE – and those who don’t.
Are you at an inflection point? Apply to the Coaching for Leaders Academy by Friday, September 11th.
Sep 7
18 min

Aiko Bethea: Anchored, Aligned, Accountable
Aiko Bethea is the Founder and CEO of RARE Coaching & Consulting, a leadership development firm that partners with Fortune 100 companies, nonprofits, and global organizations to build accountable, values-driven cultures. She is listed as #3 on the list of Top Executive Coaches of 2026 by the Industry Leader and has spent over a decade coaching C-suite leaders across industries, and served previously as deputy director at the Bill & Melinda Gates Foundation. She is the author of Anchored, Aligned, Accountable: A Framework for Transcending BS and Transforming Our Lives and Work (Amazon, Bookshop)*.
I have seen so many activities over the years to help leaders clarify their values. I have built some of them myself. And most of them, including the ones I’ve built, miss a big question: what do those values actually mean? In this conversation, Aiko and I explore that question in detail to help us all do a better job of staying grounded.
Key Points
In an era of information everywhere, it’s more challenging than ever to engage our inner awareness.
An anchor keeps a ship in place during the storm. Our values do the same for us as leaders.
Values aren’t just decorative. Simply naming a value doesn’t tell us much about what it means.
Explore the behaviors that come out of labels we use for values. Those behaviors help us better align with others – and ourselves.
A value label may mean one thing to one person and something entirely different to someone else. Curiosity will help you uncover what really matters to people.
Beware naming values that are simply aspirational. Instead, zero in on what is actually true for you.
Resources Mentioned
Anchored, Aligned, Accountable: A Framework for Transcending BS and Transforming Our Lives and Work by Aiko Bethea (Amazon, Bookshop)*.
Interview Notes
Download my interview notes in PDF format (free membership required).
Related Episodes
Leadership in the Midst of Chaos, with Jim Mattis (episode 440)
How to Discover What Others Value, with Joe Hart (episode 616)
The Way to Build Collective Power, with Ruchika T. Malhotra (episode 759)
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Sep 7
38 min

Academy alum Jen Quammen joins Dave to share how she prioritized showing up at her best when taking on a major leadership role.
Are you at an inflection point? Apply to the Coaching for Leaders Academy by Friday, September 11th.
Sep 2
23 min

Pam Manfredo Curtis: The Origin of a Leader
Pam Manfredo Curtis is an executive coach and Founder and President of Manfredo Curtis Associates. Her coaching approach involves mining the hearts and souls and childhoods of her CEO clients so they can reach their full potential—to lead authentically, to achieve extraordinary results, and to forge deep, emotional connections, both professionally and personally. She hosted SiriusXM’s Corner Office Confidential and is the author of The Origin of a Leader: Transforming Family Patterns into Leadership Power (Amazon, Bookshop)*.
All of us get blocked, and when we do, our tendency is to set aside or sometimes to run away from our emotions. Today’s guest invites us to do the exact opposite so we can actually tap into our leadership power. In this conversation, Pam and I explore how to learn more about yourself and to use that insight for good.
Key Points
A significant predictor of how you show up as a leader is your childhood.
As you learn about yourself, you realize that everyone else already knows these things about you.
Create an emotional timeline by drawing a line from birth to today and highlighting the highs and lows of your life’s events.
It’s significant what shows up on your timeline – and also how the length of the highs and lows relate to each other.
When you understand how childhood impacts your leadership and who you are as a human being, you see how it affects an essential need as a leader: power.
By creating a timeline, you will be motivated to change in positive ways, see connections you’ve never seen before, and have more empathy for yourself and others.
Resources Mentioned
The Origin of a Leader: Transforming Family Patterns into Leadership Power by Pam Manfredo Curtis (Amazon, Bookshop)*
Interview Notes
Download my interview notes in PDF format (free membership required).
Related Episodes
The Way to Be More Self-Aware, with Tasha Eurich (episode 442)
Discover Who You Are, with Hortense le Gentil (episode 459)
How to Discover Self-Awareness Through Enneagram, with Ian Morgan Cron (episode 605)
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Aug 31
39 min

Olivia Fox Cabane: The Charisma Myth
Olivia Fox Cabane is one of the world’s leading authorities on the science of charisma and the bestselling author of The Charisma Myth, which has been translated into 27 languages. Previously Director of Innovative Leadership for Stanford StartX, Olivia has lectured on charisma, leadership, and innovation at Harvard, Yale, MIT, the Marine War College and the United Nations. She has been featured in The New York Times, The Economist, and The Wall Street Journal and has recently released the revised version of The Charisma Myth: How Anyone Can Master the Art and Science of Personal Magnetism (Amazon, Bookshop)*.
Charisma. We all notice leaders who’ve got it. Many of us wish we had more of it. Good news though – like so many leadership skills we talk about on this podcast, you can get better at it. In this conversation, Olivia and I explore how almost anyone can improve their charisma.
Key Points
Charisma is a skill that you can learn and practice.
While some people have natural strengths for charisma more so than others, people are not simply born charismatic. Many just start young.
You don’t have to be naturally outgoing. You can be a very charismatic introvert.
Presence + Power + Warmth = Charisma
Power is the “Can you move mountains for me?” question. Warmth is the “Would you want to move them for me?” question. Presence is the “Are you aware of which mountains I need moved?” question.
A small amount of improvement can make a big difference on how you are perceived.
Three quick tips to improve your charisma:
Lower the intonation of your voice at the end of your sentences.
Reduce how quickly and how often you nod.
Pause for two full seconds before you speak.
Resources Mentioned
The Charisma Myth: How Anyone Can Master the Art and Science of Personal Magnetism by Olivia Fox Cabane (Amazon, Bookshop)*
Interview Notes
Download my interview notes in PDF format (free membership required).
Related Episodes
Six Ways to Recover From a Bad First Impression, with John Corcoran (episode 169)
The Way to Make Sense to Others, with Tom Henschel (episode 518)
How to Make a Better Impression on Camera, with Mark Bowden (episode 643)
Discover More
Activate your free membership for full access to the entire library of interviews since 2011, searchable by topic. Go beyond the podcast to find the right ideas and apply them with confidence in Coaching for Leaders Plus.
Aug 24
38 min

Academy alum Dev Baldwin joins Dave to share how he leveraged the power of learning from peers.
Are you at an inflection point? Apply to the Coaching for Leaders Academy by Friday, September 11th.
Aug 20
20 min
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