Clutch My Pearls

Come slam the door with The Girls! This week Vanessa is presenting “Unhinged” by Vera Valentine! This book truly lives up to its name and will leave you wondering if your door is a descendent of Zeus! The story is entirely from the door’s POV (yes, it’s a literal DOOR). It’s the door to Tana’s apartment, he’s been keeping an eye on her, and he wants to be her biggest protector. A literal door can only do so much, so to become human, the door just needs his knob turned by true love’s…you get the picture. Make sense?! *sigh* Sure it does! It helps if you envision Idris Elba. Knock knock, come in!New Episodes out every Tuesday! Join our Patreon to receive early (and bonus!) episodes and more! Patreon.com/ClutchMyPearlsPod Watch the video version of this podcast on our YouTube channel! Follow @ClutchMyPearlsPod on TikTok, Twitter, Instagram and GoodReads! We have MERCH! Check out our #linkinbio to go to our store!Do you have a smut recommendation for the girls? Send an email to: [email protected] Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Come confess your sins with The Girls! This week Vanessa is presenting “Sinners Anonymous” by Somme Sketcher. In an effort to save her nature preserve, bird loving Rory (or Aurora for short…) is engaged to a bad bulldog-looking man named Big Al. But as she soon finds out, his hottie nephew Angelo is the one with the real power. Is it too late for her to get out of the marriage? Find out! Oh, and there’s also bird stuff, a confession phone line, bird words, location dementia, more bird stuff, pearl necklaces, and even more bird stuff! Even with all that this book will have you kicking your little feet and saying “what the flamingo!”New Episodes out every Tuesday! Join our Patreon to receive early (and bonus!) episodes and more! Patreon.com/ClutchMyPearlsPod Watch the video version of this podcast on our YouTube channel! Follow @ClutchMyPearlsPod on TikTok, Amazon, Twitter, Instagram, YouTube and GoodReads! We have MERCH! Check out our #linkinbio to go to our store!Do you have a smut recommendation for the girls? Send an email to: [email protected] Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Come save humanity with The Girls! This week Barbara is presenting the world premiere of “Celestial Glorbosis: Of Peace and Poimals” by Jace Hammercock. This episode is unique because The Girls are joined by Jace Hammercock (pen name of Geoff Ramsey and Gavin Free from the Regulation Podcast) for an exclusive interview to discuss whatever the hell they’ve written. This 13 page novella that begins mid-adventure is out of this world - a “wide shoes” featuring an Alabama Texas Oil and Cattle man named Girthyll, a supple FMC with a Cockney accent named Gavalina Sploogery, and a sexual pleasure alien named Glorble X. We usually assure you it’ll all make sense once you listen, but we can’t guarantee it this time. Emily tried to be a supportive wife and have no icks…she failed, but will you?New Episodes out every Tuesday! Join our Patreon to receive early (and bonus!) episodes and more! Patreon.com/ClutchMyPearlsPod Watch the video version of this podcast on our YouTube channel! Follow @ClutchMyPearlsPod on TikTok, Twitter, Instagram and GoodReads! We have MERCH! Check out our #linkinbio to go to our store!Do you have a smut recommendation for the girls? Send an email to: [email protected] Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Come enjoy getting scared with The Girls! This week Vanessa is continuing her bad boy era with “Haunting Adeline” by HD Carlton. This book was not only heavily recommended by our listeners, it comes with a FULL page of trigger warnings! The Girls are all in and along for the ride…but ready to get out by the end. When scare-happy Adeline moves into her dead grandma’s spooky house, dark Scorpio stalker Zade Meadows decides to focus his single white eye on her. This book has everything you could imagine from “dark romance” as well as everything you couldn’t, and it isn’t even the baddest boy Vanessa has read! So grab a rose, sip your whiskey, and remember… it’s just a book. New Episodes out every Tuesday! Join our Patreon to receive early (and bonus!) episodes and more! Patreon.com/ClutchMyPearlsPod Watch the video version of this podcast on our YouTube channel! Follow @ClutchMyPearlsPod on TikTok, Twitter, Instagram and GoodReads! We have MERCH! Check out our #linkinbio to go to our store!Do you have a smut recommendation for the girls? Send an email to: [email protected] Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Count to three and come with The Girls! This week Barbara is presenting “The Maddest Obsession,” the second book of the Made Series also seen in episodes 2 and 16! In this mafia romance we have Christian Allister, the cold, controlling, orderly, OCD counting, sexy mafia man who also works for the FBI! Then there’s Gianna, our sexy, sassy, can’t be controlled, “not like the other girls” FMC. Over the span of 7 years, Gianna might get married and widowed a few times, but her true love is Christian. This is not The Sopranos, but Emily manages to bring it up at every chance. Tune in and kick your little feet because this book is once, twice, three times a good one!New Episodes out every Tuesday! Join our Patreon to receive early (and bonus!) episodes and more! Patreon.com/ClutchMyPearlsPod Watch the video version of this podcast on our YouTube channel! Follow @ClutchMyPearlsPod on TikTok, Twitter, Instagram and GoodReads! We have MERCH! Check out our #linkinbio to go to our store!Do you have a smut recommendation for the girls? Send an email to: [email protected] Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Come pay off your father’s debt with The Girls! This week Vanessa is presenting “Den of Vipers” by K.A. Knight! This  why choose (wide shoes) dark romance has everything…maybe too much for some! When mafia hotties Ryder, Kenzo, Garrett, and Diesel collect their debt in the form of sassy babe Roxy…she doesn’t go willingly. Thankfully everyone involved likes to put up a fight and use sharp objects. This episode had Emily crossing her eyes, Vanessa kicking her little feet, and Barbara buffering, what will it have you doing?!New Episodes out every Tuesday! Join our Patreon to receive early (and bonus!) episodes and more! Patreon.com/ClutchMyPearlsPod! Watch the video version of this podcast on our YouTube channel! Follow @ClutchMyPearlsPod on TikTok, Twitter, Instagram and GoodReads! We have MERCH! Check out our #linkinbio to go to our store!Do you have a smut recommendation for the girls? Send an email to: [email protected] Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Come test positive with The Girls! This week Barbara is presenting “Kissing the Coronavirus” by M.J. Edwards! This 15 page novella (if you don’t count page 9) was brought as revenge on Vanessa for blindsiding Barbara in the July Patreon-exclusive episode. When woman-in-STEM Dr. Alexa Ashingtonford is working on a cure for the newly discovered COVID-19, things get a little…testy. Even though this book feels like a MadLibs about a science lab, you’ll never guess how goat eyes, microwaved fish, and a floral sweater are involved! Nothing about this book is serious, which is why The Girls don’t take it too seriously! It’s better to just laugh than think about it too much.New Episodes out every Tuesday! Join our Patreon to receive early (and bonus!) episodes and more! Patreon.com/ClutchMyPearlsPod! Watch the video version of this podcast on our YouTube channel! Follow @ClutchMyPearlsPod on TikTok, Twitter, Instagram and GoodReads! We have MERCH! Check out our #linkinbio to go to our store!Do you have a smut recommendation for the girls? Send an email to: [email protected] Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Come climb Jacob’s Ladder with The Girls! This week Vanessa is presenting “The Pucking Wrong Guy” by C.R. Jane! As we continue the “Pucking Wrong" series we started in episode 27, we meet Ari Lancaster and Blake (or Serena!). When Ari crosses paths with his long lost foster care first love, he doesn’t let her know he recognizes her. Instead he brings in his old stalker pal Lincoln Daniels to help with his own stalking. When Ari assumes the identity of Blake’s ex and finds himself in a closet playing 7min in heaven, all is revealed…and it’s HUGE! This episode will have you screaming Holy Batman, so tune in and remember: it’s just fiction.New Episodes out every Tuesday! Join our Patreon to receive early (and bonus!) episodes and more! Patreon.com/ClutchMyPearlsPod! Follow @ClutchMyPearlsPod on TikTok, Twitter, Instagram and GoodReads! We have MERCH! Check out our #linkinbio to go to our store!Do you have a smut recommendation for the girls? Send an email to: [email protected] Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Come ask “What’s in the box?!” with The Girls! This week Barbara is presenting with a physical copy of “Ransom” by Julie Garwood! This book is set in the medieval Scottish highlands and follows our FMC Gillian and MMC Brodick! There are also at least 13 more people and since Emily is not into historical romance or meeting a lot of characters, Barbara thankfully came prepared with a whiteboard! Check out our YouTube video to follow along! Anyways, Gillian is English and Brodick is Scottish, their worlds collide in the animated Robin Hood universe, and they’re looking for a mystery box along with their sooooo hot friends, Ariana Grande, and a couple of maybe-dead but maybe-not-dead kids. But first they have to consummate their marriage. Make sense? Of course it does!New Episodes out every Tuesday! Join our Patreon to receive early (and bonus!) episodes and more! Patreon.com/ClutchMyPearlsPod! Follow @ClutchMyPearlsPod on TikTok, Twitter, Instagram and GoodReads! We have MERCH! Check out our #linkinbio to go to our store!Do you have a smut recommendation for the girls? Send an email to: [email protected] Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Come throw lettuce heads out of the top window with The Girls! This week Vanessa is presenting “Heartless” by Elsie Silver! Part of the Chestnut Springs series, this book brings us back to the cowboy brothers we met in Episode 25 “Flawless”. This book is focused on grumpy cowboy Cade who needs help with his little boy Luke. When fun city girl Willa is hired to help out, her panties literally drop. This steamy book will leave you swooning over the banter, the sweet and spice of Cade, and it’ll have you ready to do whatever it takes to quiet your mouth! New Episodes out every Tuesday! Join our Patreon to receive early (and bonus!) episodes and more! Patreon.com/ClutchMyPearlsPod! Follow @ClutchMyPearlsPod on TikTok, Twitter, Instagram, Amazon and GoodReads! We have MERCH! Check out our #linkinbio to go to our store!Do you have a smut recommendation for the girls? Send an email to: [email protected] Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.