In this podcast, we discuss how with the benefit of four years of continuous sobriety, Tony is able to recollect with some objectivity his downward spiral and his path to recovery. Here we learned that:Parents are always at a loss of what to do, as they are not educated on the nature of the disease that has taken over their child.Tony's mom, burdened by anxiety and fear, was nonetheless ready to sacrifice everything to help her son get sober.At some point, even Tony knew he had a problem but couldn't figure out how to resolve it with or without help. His was what we call the "revolving door or relapse".Only when he was truly sick and tired of living in guilt and shame did the "teacher" appear. That is when he made the decision to find a sanctuary and surrender his old ways of thinking.

In this podcast, we learn from the dialogue on Vital Matters between Adam and Tony that:Living one day at a time eases the fear of having to stay sober forever, as it focuses one on the here and now.Connected to that idea is the peace that comes with attaining present-moment awareness, a concept that has been taught over the centuries and applicable to today, right now.Perhaps the most Vital of matters is the journey from the head to the heart, born of seeking faith to gain understanding, and not the other way around.The paradox of achieving victory in surrender and realizing liberation in discipline is a puzzle at first until we understand that surrender means giving up our old ways of thinking and that self-discipline will liberate us from the shackles imposed by the slavery of addiction.

This podcast is an interview with Adam and Tony, two young men who share the story of recovery from a potentially deadly disorder. The occasion was Adam's two-year milestone beginning with his entering residential treatment in Thailand.We learned about the conversation with Adam and Tony that:In early sobriety, we ourselves don't notice that we are changing for the better, but the people close to us do. It takes consistent, sober and good behaviour to have people begin to trust us again.It's not unusual for active addicts to create and sustain unjustified resentments, because unrecovered addicts are extremely self-centred and tend to blame others for their woes.Holding oneself accountable and making amends are among the greatest challenges that recovering addicts and alcoholics encounter on their journey. As Adam says: "It's big boy time. Time to grow up".Conversely, the burden is greatly eased when "We live one day at a time." Being fully present in the Now has been taught by gurus for centuries as the essence of the spiritual life, the reason we meditate to begin with.

In this podcast, we describe what the chaos of "desperate enabling" looks like, how it starts and how it can be arrested by a wake-up call.We learn the following from Alice, the mum in this story:A family's journey down the slippery slope toward desperate enabling starts slowly and imperceptibly, without the slightest suspicion that there is anything brewing.Enabling is well-meaning, but it is misguided because it simply gives the disease the oxygen it craves to keep thriving.The family deludes itself into believing that it has any power to arrest the disease when the truth is that they are powerless over the ultimate course of a progressive disorder.Chaos will rule the house unless some form of intervention takes place, almost always with the help of a professional trained in addictive disease.When Alice and her husband made the decision that they needed to live their own lives without guilt did the chaos subside. That decision meant that they could finally live happily together, one day at a time.

Adam, our young recovering addict, relates his escape from the hell that addiction had confined him in:"There was a point where I had become a rageful person, but I didn't really know who I was. I would wake up and wonder what I would do that was crazy or violent. Plus, I was scared all the time - of what hurt I would inflict on an innocent person"."Here is the irony: I ended up graduating from college in the UK (I was kicked out of the previous one for violence and drunkenness) and landed a good job as a project manager. So, my disguises worked for a while"." My addiction to opiates accelerated after my hip surgery - I had many injuries from street fighting - soon, I would be popping Vicodin, Oxycontin and also Xanax all day and then some heroin too"."The end came like this: I went home and attacked my father. I then went into my room and started cutting myself. I called my psychiatrist who urged me to go to a rehab right away. I flew to Thailand the same week".I am now 2 plus years sober and clean. I go to a lot of AA meetings (many on Zoom) and my greatest joy today is helping other guys of my generation get and stay clean and sober. If this menace to society can do it, anyone can".

In our interview with Adam, a 32-year-old recovering addict, he recalls the early years which led him down the path to severe addiction.He was plagued by deep resentment toward his father who was, in Adam's young view, not attentive enough to his desire for love and affection.Despite, or because of, being part of a very affluent family in Dubai, he was let loose on the "streets" where he could do whatever he wanted, including the sampling of every drug under the sun.He became a chameleon like many addicts, changing his personality to fit into the crowd at the time. Peer pressure to conform during teen years is already intense, and his desire to fit in was only amplified as he slipped into addiction at an early age.He relates that his disease progression accelerated as he started to use more onerous drugs, resulting in violence and alienation from family and society. He relates his journey to the wake-call in Part Two.

Frank's story continues with his conclusions based on his recollections, in his own words."If I weren't then using, I would not have found myself in bizarre situations like a house of prostitution in Jakarta. I ended up with a fellow Canadian buying heroin to sell it later in Thailand. The penalty for that could be death. I shudder about that to this day"."I still struggle with the idea that addiction is a disease, and not a moral failing or personal weakness. I say that if I can kick it, why can't they"?"Then again, I have gained a lot more empathy for others who do indeed suffer, largely based on my conversations with the people at Safehouse Rehab who have had me come around quite a bit"."I have also learned about ACOA - Adult Children of Alcoholics - which has taught me that I carry the effects of this disease whether I am aware of it or not. I now understand why it is said addiction is a family disease".

We learned in Part One of our interview with Frank that:Addictive behaviour is hardly ever recognized for what it is early in the process; it is seen simply as hurtful, especially to innocent people like children in the family of an adult addict.Frank's story clearly shows that one does not always become an addict despite the abuse of drugs. He had not lost the power of choice after all and rather chose to help his friends who were suffering from the effects of their addiction.Addiction to drugs and alcohol can strike anyone, anywhere, and at any time. Even those who achieve wonderful things can be victimized by the disorder later in life.There is much to be said about the power of a loving person who is able to have the addict see the light; the addict must at that point choose that it is better to become abstinent than absent from a decent life of purpose and meaning.

In this article entitled "You're Not Thinking Straight", we discuss the undeniable fact that addiction takes over the addict's thought process and that there is merit in seeing the addict and the addiction as separate entities.We cover the following topics:Family members need to make the distinction between the person as an addict and the addiction as an entity that warps his thinking and takes over his thought process.The sole purpose of the addiction is to feed and protect itself. It lives in constant fear of death, of being denied the means to stay alive and thrive.It, therefore, employs a full suite of clever strategies designed to have it flourish, and to protect itself whenever threatened. It plays both offence and defence.The main strategies addiction and alcoholism use as fuel to keep their motors running are: denial, justification, deception, and manipulation of the people who love them the most.Recognizing that it is the addiction which has stolen a love one's thinking makes it easier to say no to the person one loves and will prove to be a liberating and empowering idea.

In this article, we address the fact that family members can do more to help improve treatment outcomes in their communities and at large.We ask them to consider that:They can have an impact on the larger picture of improving outcomes by supporting initiatives such as the ones proposed by Shatterproof.In so doing, family members will have the satisfaction of knowing that they are not powerless to be of help to society. They can help put a stop to ineffective, marginal solutions to a central problem.By practicing the modern approach to recovery, SafeHouse Rehab meets or exceeds all Best Practices for treatment.We are proud to support the efforts of organizations whose mission is to improve outcomes for those with substance abuse disorder.Working with others to support positive change will rejuvenate the spirit of family members who know they are doing something to help a cause that is greater than themselves.