Show notes
If a small part of you is whispering, “There has to be more than just surviving,” this episode is for you. Brave Widow Resources Free, Live “Four Seasons of Grief” Training + Quiz: bravewidow.com/liveRebuild a Life You Can Love Again in the Brave Widow Academy (join the waitlist or book a call): https://bravewidow.com/academyCreate Calm from Chaos and Heal Your Heart inside Brave Widow Foundations:👉 bravewidow.com/foundationsJoin the free Brave Widow Community: https://bravewidow.com/free If you’ve ever wanted more from life after losing your spouse then immediately felt guilty for even thinking it… you’re not alone. In this episode, I share my honest story of wanting more after my husband died, the shame that wouldn’t leave, and what finally helped me see that wanting a full, vibrant life is not betraying his memory. We’ll talk about:Why widow guilt is so heavy when you start to want moreThe “loyalty myth” that says enjoying life means you’ve moved onHow grief is both/and (you can miss your person and still build something beautiful)Three big sources of guilt: loyalty, comparison, and lost identityA simple two-part challenge to notice your thoughts and give yourself permission to want one thing without apology CHAPTERS00:00 Feeling guilty for wanting more after loss 01:08 “Is this my life now?” internal conflict 03:20 Grief is both/and, not either/or 05:15 Can I enjoy life if my person isn’t here? 06:40 Where widow guilt really comes from 09:05 The loyalty myth: am I leaving them behind? 12:10 Comparison trap: “It never gets better” messages 14:40 Who am I without my spouse? Identity after widowhood 17:05 Letting feelings be a check engine light, not the driver 19:15 Exercise: notice desire & write down your guilty thoughts 21:40 Reframing beliefs & giving yourself permission to want more 23:30 Building a life big enough to hold grief, love, and what comes next 💬 If this episode helped you, please: Hit Subscribe Leave a quick rating & review – it helps more widows find this supportShare this with a friend who’s facing grief or the holidays without their person If you’re new here, my name is Emily Tanner. I’m the founder of Brave Widow and Brave Widow Academy. I help widows move from barely surviving their loss… to rebuilding a life they can actually love again without feeling like they’re betraying their person. By day (and for 20+ years), I’ve led large teams and complex operations in the corporate world. After my husband Nathan died in 2021, just shy of our 20-year anniversary, I took everything I knew about leadership, systems, and change — and started applying it to grief. Since then, I’ve:Shared my story publicly to make widows feel less alone.Launched the Brave Widow podcast, now with 180+ episodes and listeners around the world.Coached hundreds of widows Built Brave Widow Academy, a 6-month coaching program with a clear framework for moving from deep grief to rebuilding a life you can love again. I don’t teach “just think positive” grief tips. I teach widows how to:Heal their heart.Stop waiting on “time” to fix everything.Take small, brave steps toward a life that feels meaningful again. How I Got Here… 2021: My husband Nathan dies unexpectedly. I’m 4 kids in, overwhelmed, and drowning in paperwork, decisions, and pain. Therapy helps, but I still feel stuck with no roadmap. 2021–2022: I start devouring books, interviewing widows, trying grief groups, and studying coaching — desperate to find something that actually helps me feel different. 2022: I start the Brave Widow podcast, recording episodes while terrified and crying between takes — but determined that no widow should feel as alone as I did. Year 1: I begin coaching widows Year 2: I launch Brave Widow Academy — a structured, 6-month coaching program with a step-by-step path: from deep grief, to stability, to rebuilding. Year 3: Brave Widow has listeners around the world. I’ve personally coached hundreds of widows and spoken with thousands more through consults, lives, emails, and DMs. Today: My work is simple: Help widows stop surviving each day… and start rebuilding a life that makes them genuinely glad to be alive again.