Boundaries are a topic that often elicits mixed reactions. Some people embrace them as a necessary tool for maintaining healthy relationships, while others view them as unnecessary or even confrontational.    In this episode, Kasey and Kelsey share personal experiences and examples to illustrate the challenges and benefits of setting boundaries in different areas of life, such as work, relationships, and family. They also touch on the difficulty of setting boundaries with toxic individuals, and the importance of self-advocacy and self-love in the process.     Key Topics:  (01:05) The overuse and misuse of boundaries  (04:20) Correctly setting boundaries in relationships  (05:20) Kasey’s experience of first setting boundaries as a new business owner  (10:05) Boundaries as a form of self-advocacy and self-love  (16:30) The fear of upsetting others as a barrier to setting boundaries  (20:23) The difference between setting boundaries and avoidance   Connect with Kasey and Kelsey: instagram.com/hikaseycompton facebook.com/hikaseycompton kaseycompton.com/backporchbestie

The key to a strong relationship? Emotional safety. It is the foundation upon which trust, vulnerability, and intimacy are built. However, many of us may not even be aware of what emotional safety truly means or how it impacts our relationships.    In this conversation, Kasey and Kelsey discuss the importance of emotional safety and its significance in fostering a healthy and fulfilling connection. They reflect on their own experiences and emphasize the importance of being able to share their emotions openly and honestly with one another. Listen now to discover the power of creating a safe space for your emotions, as well as how to build stronger relationships through emotional safety!     Key Topics:  (01:30) What is emotional safety?  (05:45) Kasey and Kelsey share personal experiences of emotional safety  (10:10) Differences in emotional dysregulation between partners  (15:35) Getting out of survival mode and creating stronger relationships  (20:30) Why relationships take intentional work  (21:20) Advice for improving emotional safety in your relationships   Connect with Kasey and Kelsey: instagram.com/hikaseycompton facebook.com/hikaseycompton kaseycompton.com/backporchbestie

As a follow-up to episode 09 with Jessica Schroeder, this episode continues with the topic of emotions. Kelsey explains her reasoning for dissociating during the previous episode, and opens up about her journey of self-discovery and the realization that she had been settling for less in life. Together, Kasey and Kelsey delve into their childhood experiences and the impact it has had on their emotional expression. They discuss the role of their parents, friendships, and the need for a safe space to share emotions.    This heartfelt conversation highlights the importance of understanding one's emotional needs and the value of being present for others in their vulnerable moments.      Key Topics:  (01:38) Kelsey reflects on her dissociation during the previous episode  (02:51) Emotional discomfort throughout childhood  (05:50) Challenges of finding safe spaces for emotional expression  (10:11) The importance of vulnerability and emotional support in relationships  (14:00) Kasey expresses her desire to be a safe place for Kelsey and others  (21:15) Kasey shares her regrets about not having emotional support earlier in life and the impact it has had   Connect with Kasey and Kelsey: instagram.com/hikaseycompton facebook.com/hikaseycompton kaseycompton.com/backporchbestie

Emotions are an essential part of our everyday lives, but not everyone has the tools to navigate them effectively. This is where Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT) comes into play! In this episode, Jessica Schroeder shares her personal experience with EFT and how it changed her perspective on human existence.   Join us as we discuss the impact of childhood relationships on adult attachment styles and behaviors, and how it can manifest in fear of failure, abandonment and disappointment. Learn how EFT can help you gain the tools to process past experiences and express your emotions effectively, as well as break unhealthy patterns and help lead you to a more fulfilling life!   About Jessica:  Jessica Schroeder, MS, LCMFT, RPT-S, is the owner and clinical director of JS Therapy Group, LLC which has three locations located in the Kansas City metro area. She is a Certified Emotionally Focused Therapist and Supervisor and is passionate about helping other therapists develop secure attachments both professionally and personally.    Jessica graduated from the University of Kansas in 2008 with her Bachelor of Arts in Psychology with an emphasis in children and family. She went on to graduate from Friends University in 2010 with a Masters of Science in Family Therapy. Outside of the therapy room, Jessica enjoys traveling with her husband, James, and their son, Jackson. Her heart melts anytime she sees a Dachshund!   Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/jstherapygroupllc Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/jstherapygroup/ https://www.eftcoupletherapyintensives.com/     Key Topics:  [02:35] Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT) and attachment  [05:00] Personal experiences with EFT therapy  [08:19] Learning to express and understand emotions  [11:08] Choosing partners based on comfort zones and attachment styles  [24:00] Fear of abandonment and core fears  [25:30] The importance of resolving conflicts and communication in relationships  [33:50] Depression and anxiety   Connect with Kasey and Kelsey: Website: kaseycompton.com/backporchbestie Instagram: instagram.com/hikaseycompton Facebook: facebook.com/hikaseycompton

Dr. Kellie Rice provides valuable insights into the topic of codependency, emphasizing the importance of self-awareness, setting boundaries, seeking therapy, and finding one's true identity in healing from codependent relationships. She also touches on the impact of scarcity mindset, the importance of valuing time and being specific about preferences in dating, and the role of codependency and narcissism in relationships.    Listen now as we explore the root causes of codependency and how to prioritize your own well-being. Learn how to establish healthy boundaries and create fulfilling relationships. Remember, understanding yourself and staying true to your values is key to a fulfilling life!   About Dr. Kelly:  Dr. Kellie Rice is a psychologist, Certified Group Psychotherapist and Certified Mental Health Integrative Medicine Provider specializing in treating eating disorders, addictions, co-dependence. With over 18 years of experience in individual and group psychotherapy, and as a graduate of New York University and The Illinois School of Professional Psychology specializing in trauma and addiction, Dr. Rice created the Mind Body Co-op as a place where individuals can begin the journey of healing and recovery through both the mind and the body. Additionally, Dr. Rice is the founder and CEO at the Mind Body Co-op, leading a team of like-minded treatment professionals, who are committed to helping individuals, families, and groups navigate the intersection between past history, current struggles, and future goals.    Dr. Rice is an interactive, solution-focused therapist. Her therapeutic approach is to provide support and practical feedback to help clients effectively address personal life challenges. She integrates complementary methodologies and techniques to offer a highly personalized approach tailored to each client. With compassion and understanding, she works with each individual to help them build on their strengths and attain the personal growth they are committed to accomplishing.    Dr. Rice is currently working towards her certification in EMDR Therapy and is currently healing trauma through EMDR with clients.   https://www.linkedin.com/company/mind-body-co-op https://www.facebook.com/mindbodycoop https://www.instagram.com/mindbodycoop/     Key Topics:  [02:48] Defining codependency and the different interpretations  [04:14] Attachment styles and losing one's identity  [06:25] Facing Codependence by Pia Mellody  [11:15] The impact of childhood experiences on codependency  [12:50] The role of resistance in creating deeper connections in relationships  [19:50] Challenges of parenting non-codependent children  [30:40] Scarcity mindset on relationships  [34:00] Codependency and narcissism in relationships   Connect with Kasey and Kelsey: Website: kaseycompton.com/backporchbestie Instagram: instagram.com/hikaseycompton Facebook: facebook.com/hikaseycompton

Rachel Harrison, LCPC, NCC shares her personal experience with trauma and how it led her to become a trauma specialist. She believes that trauma is often the root of many mental health symptoms and that everyone has experienced trauma to some degree. Simply having insight into the trauma does not necessarily stop the behavior or distress. EMDR therapy works by taking the distress away and decreasing the body and emotional response to traumatic memories, allowing clients to remember the event without feeling the associated negative emotions.   Tune in to learn how EMDR therapy works, the importance of attachment styles in healing trauma, as well as the concept of memory networks and how they can impact our behavior and emotions.    About Rachel:  Rachel Harrison, LCPC, NCC is passionate about training therapists to be effective in treating trauma. She is the Founder & Clinical Director of Trauma Specialists of Maryland, Trauma Specialists of Delaware and The Trauma Specialist Training Institute. She is an EMDRIA approved trainer and consultant, offering EMDRIA approved EMDR trainings nationally.    Rachel brings 25 years of experience as a therapist specializing in the treatment of complex trauma and attachment. She is a member of the adjunct faculty at Hood College, providing courses in trauma, EMDR, Group Therapy, and Attachment Theory in Clinical Practice. Additionally, she serves as a Consultant for the GRITT, a network of volunteer EMDR therapists serving the Frederick community, including first responders, police and firefighters by providing both crisis services and pro bono EMDR Sessions at no cost following exposure to human made or natural disasters. She offers both community and professional training in attachment parenting, working with children, the treatment of trauma, EMDR, dissociation and adoption, among other topics.    Rachel believes in treating trauma, specifically using EMDR to heal our communities. She has been delving into the topic of growing leaders in her businesses and in the community. To this end, her new project is a podcast entitled Leadership Evolution, interviewing community leaders on the topic of leadership and its evolution over the last several years.   Instagram: @trauma_specialist Facebook: Trauma Specialists Training Institute  Website: https://www.traumaspecialiststraining.com/     Key Topics:  [06:30] EMDR Therapy and how it can be used to treat trauma  [09:15] Memory networks and dissociation of memory  [15:50] The importance of body awareness  [23:15] Attachment styles and the impact of attachment wounds on relationships  [30:15] Finding compassion while processing trauma   Connect with Kasey and Kelsey: Website: kaseycompton.com/backporchbestie Instagram: instagram.com/hikaseycompton Facebook: facebook.com/hikaseycompton

As a follow-up to episode 05 with Scarlett Mulligan, this episode continues with the topic of attachment. In the previous episode, Scarlett mentioned that we can form attachment styles as children, which can in turn affect our lives as adults. Kasey and Kelsey had a lot of thoughts about this, including how Scarlett was able to take the trauma she had experienced and turn it into something that could now be used as a backbone.    Many people carry around painful memories from childhood and early adulthood and are weighed down by them. This conversation looks back on Kasey’s past and explores the various ways trauma can appear, such as needing to continuously escape reality or the need to always know what is going on in order to feel a sense of protection.      Key Topics:  (01:50) Past experiences can weigh you down  (03:28) Using relocation as a coping mechanism towards trauma  (05:15) Escape to Fripp Island  (07:06) Energy pie  (08:25) Being hypervigilant  (10:08) Using predictability as a form of protection   Connect with Kasey and Kelsey: instagram.com/hikaseycompton facebook.com/hikaseycompton kaseycompton.com/backporchbestie

Scarlett Mulligan shares the impact of attachment styles on mental health, and shares her own experience growing up with parents who had their own attachment issues, which in turn was passed on to Scarlett. Hear her story of overcoming intergenerational trauma and eventually getting to a place of internal strength and happiness.   Attachment styles can be at the root of many issues in our lives, and understanding them is crucial to addressing many of the issues we face and can lead to healing and positive changes. Learn the significance of understanding attachment styles and how they can impact our lives, relationships, and conflicts.    Your struggles can either be a backpack weighing you down or a backbone of strength. This episode will encourage you to be mindful of your own behavior and work towards building more secure attachments.     About Scarlett:  Scarlett Mulligan, PA-C is a nationally certified Physician Associate specializing in psychiatry. After serving 5 years in the USAF, she attended the University of Washington MEDEX Northwest program, graduating in 2005. Throughout her career in a variety of medical specialties she found mental health to be her calling. She has spent many of her adult years as a mental health client repairing the impact and disrupting the flow of intergenerational trauma. She currently resides in Clarksville, TN as the founder of Novus Behavioral Health - a group psychiatry practice. She considers her greatest achievement to be the secure attachment she has created with her two (almost adult) children.     Key Topics:  [02:30] The way you’re parented influences your attachment type  [04:39] The turning point in Scarlett’s life  [08:55] Over-functioning   [13:30] The process of grief  [19:06] Kung Fu Panda - the secret sauce of life  [19:26] Overcoming a limited mindset  [21:39] Preoccupied attachment style   Connect with Kasey and Kelsey: Website: kaseycompton.com/backporchbestie Instagram: instagram.com/hikaseycompton Facebook: facebook.com/hikaseycompton

Kasey and Kelsey discuss the topic of going against convention. This sparks a conversation about Kasey’s unconventional decisions from her past, including divorcing her husband from her southern baptist community and entering a relationship with a woman (Kelsey). From a young age, Kasey began going against the conventions she had been raised with, such as religion, gender roles, race and culture. This episode touches on topics related to relationships, family dynamics, and ultimately becoming your own authentic self regardless of what others think.   Tune in to hear how vulnerability can be scary, but also necessary. It takes courage to open up and share personal stories, but it can also lead to a greater understanding of yourself!     Key Topics:  (02:30) Standing up for injustice  (03:29) Childhood conversations with their grandmothers  (08:05) Extending love to other but not yourself  (13:04) Radical acceptance  (16:00) Finding unconditional love  (22:12) Getting married at a young age  (25:15) Finding pieces of yourself in other people’s stories   Connect with Kasey and Kelsey: instagram.com/hikaseycompton facebook.com/hikaseycompton kaseycompton.com/backporchbestie

Tara Vossenkemper dives into the topic of conflict. Even when it doesn't feel good emotionally, it serves a crucial function in helping individuals be heard, understood, and create better relationships. Trara provides her perspective and experience with couples therapy and the ladies share their own experiences with past conflict.    Tune in to hear how Kasey and Kelsey dealt with conflict completely differently growing up and how it affects their relationship today, the fork in the road that allowed Tara to embrace conflict, the importance of relationship friction, and much more!   About Tara:  Tara Vossenkemper, PhD, LPCC, is the founder and owner of The Counseling Hub, an accidental group counseling practice in Columbia and Jefferson City, MO. She specializes in working with couples in conflict. She also does informational group practice consulting on the side.   Tara is known for her colorful language (#PuttingItNicely), love of The Office (#USVersion), neuroticism around dashboards (#FormulasAreLife), and hashtags (#AllDay). When she's not in the office, Tara can be found hanging out with her husband, two young sons, 3 dogs and 11 chickens, waiting to pop with baby #3, and wishing it was quiet enough to read.   https://www.taravossenkemper.com/ https://www.facebook.com/drtaravossenkemper https://www.instagram.com/drtaravossenkemper/     Key Topics:   [07:00] Why healthy conflict is essential   [14:53] Conflict is necessary for growth   [20:00] Revealing self-awareness   [21:08] Healthy conflict resolution is key   [26:06] Being aware of triggers   [31:13] Self-awareness leads to growth     Connect with Kasey and Kelsey: instagram.com/hikaseycompton facebook.com/hikaseycompton kaseycompton.com/backporchbestie