I am a couples therapist and believe deeply in the healing power of relationships. I believe that we repeat our childhood trauma with the person we connect to and love, and that if we learn to manage our reactions differently, we can begin to heal that trauma. To do this, we have to hear our partner's side, instead of instinctively defending ourselves and fighting for our side. Of course, this has to go both ways, and we then heal when we mutually experience the generosity of the other. Ask Arlo releases new episodes every month on the VoiceAmerica Health and Wellness Channel.

With my guest, Michele Frimmer, I will discuss the importance and the power of an apology to heal a difficult relational moment but also how difficult it often is to use this powerful tool, because, depending on your point of view, an apology is either a heartfelt recognition of the hurt our partner is experiencing, or a completely undeserved criticism that must be defended against at any cost.  We will discuss how to move from a position of defense, which creates a negative cycle, to a position of generosity, which creates a positive, healing cycle.