Today we are talking all about online dating. In today’s world, there are multiple ways to meet new people. Technology has allowed us to see what’s out there beyond our own circles. There are so many hook-up and meeting apps it’s not even funny. It makes it convent to find a person by just swiping left or right. Danielle has dipped her toe in the online dating world a few times, but can’t seem to keep her account for more than three days at a time. The longest she’s kept an account has probably been a week. Even though she sees the perks in online dating, it annoys her more than anything. She just rather stay single than keep trying to find a partner online. Luckily for Mel, she has never had to experience the swipe culture of dating. She met her husband the old-fashioned way, so she has no clue about the online dating world. However, her friend Sanchelle has plenty of experience in the realm. So of course, we brought Sanchelle on to tell us her positive and negative experiences with dating online. She’s going to give us the tea on what apps she’s had the most success on. Sanchelle talks to us about what red flags she looks out for when dating. She also assures us online dating is totally worth it but you have to be patient and enjoy the process. We have some funny stories for you guys in this episode! We hope you laugh as hard as we did as we share these wild stories. --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/allegedly-credible/message

Are there times in your life where no matter what you do it seems like a relationship isn’t working out? You’re struggling to make it work with a partner, a friend, or a family member. It just seems like no matter what there is a lack of understanding or a lack of respect. So, when is enough, enough? Is it time to cut that person off or are you just going through a rough patch? We both struggle with pulling the plug on close relationships. Danielle always feels like she can fix something. She thinks that there is always room for forgiveness and a way to talk anything out. It’s very hard for her to let things go. She’s very used to having people cut her off, but it’s very hard for her to understand when it’s time for her to walk away. Mel struggles with this as well, but Mel is more accepting of letting things play out on their own. She understands that not everyone is meant to be in your circle. Sometimes people outgrow each other and maybe ending the relationship is for the best. If you have ever struggled with ending toxic relationships, this episode is defiantly for you. We are going to be walking you through how we’ve learned our own limits in relationships and how we apply them in our lives now. --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/allegedly-credible/message

Hey guys! This week we are talking all about intimacy. What exactly is intimacy supposed to look and feel like? Is it just about sex or does it involve so much more? If you are anything like us, the idea of being intimate is kind of scary to you, especially if you don’t have the right examples. Danielle struggles with showing affection. She is not a fan of kissing or romantic jesters. She often finds it hard to connect with any new partners. For Mel, it’s hard for her to find the same connection with her husband in recent years. Mel feels like juggling kids, jobs, and other daily activities have caused a disconnect in the way she and her husband communicate with each other at times. To help us with this discussion, we have Sage the Godsis on to go into depth about how we can become more intimate with ourselves and our partners. Sage is a Tantric Priestess and Alchemist Coach located in New Jersey. She helps afro-indigenous singles and couples through sexual and ancestral healing. Mel found her one day while scrolling through Instagram and decided to check out one of her couples classes. Mel enjoyed the class so much, that we had to have her on the show to talk with us on how we can improve our relationships. Sage is going to go over how it is important to having love for yourself first before you can show it to anyone else. We also talk in-depth about knowing your love languages as well as your partners. Also, she talks about doing check-ins on yourself and with your partner because we are constantly evolving and changing. To learn more about Sage the Godsis and sign up for any upcoming events, follow her Instagram: @sage_thegodsis. --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/allegedly-credible/message

Hello, hello, hello everybody! Welcome back to Season 2 of Allegedly Credible! Did you miss us? We surely missed you! As you may or may not know, last season Mel was super pregnant with her second child and gave birth during the summer. If you listened to our pregnancy episode in Season 1 (Pregnancy), you heard Mel’s story of her traumatic first delivery.  So, of course, this time, she wanted a different experience. This is where she met Alaina Snell-Broach. Alaina is a midwife, doula, spiritual counselor, and healthcare advocate. She is the founder of Ahavah Birth & Beyond, LLC and is a part of Ahavah House Global Services Inc. Today Alaina is here to with the crew about the roles midwives and doulas play in aiding women with pregnancy. She is going to walk you through what to expect during home birth and how she sets you up for the best possible outcome for you and your family. Mel is going to tell you how having a midwife and doula helped her prepare mentally, physically, and emotionally. She talks about what it means to have a VBAC (going from a C-section back to a natural birth), why she wanted to have a homebirth, and how her delivery went this time around. Danielle is pretty much along for the ride in this episode. She was defiantly taking notes. Y'all take some too because there are so many gems dropped here! You’re gonna learn today! --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/allegedly-credible/message

Today we are talking about our personal sexual experiences. We decided to have this open dialog because we both realize we have some healing to do in this department. Mel talks about how she grew up seeing other girls getting male attention around her. When she started getting play, she was so excited that she didn’t think all of her decisions through. Now that she’s with her husband, she sees the difference between being desperate for affection versus having a real connection with a partner. Danielle talks about how being molested as a child shaped her sex views. She went through a period where even talking about sex made her uncomfortable. At some point, Danielle thought that she had gotten over her childhood trauma, but after having her first positive experience with sex, she realized she never fully dealt with the abuse. Though we tackle some serious things in this episode, best believe we still laugh hard and joke! We wouldn’t be who we are today if we couldn’t laugh at all the stupid things we have done in our younger years. Get comfortable and laugh with us…this episode is a trip! P.S. This is the last episode of Season 1! Thank you so much for listening. We appreciate the love and support. We’ll be back for Season 2 in the Fall! --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/allegedly-credible/message

Growing up, we knew Sunday meant we were going to church. Period. The end. No was not an option.  As children, we were often told to dress our best for God to show how thankful we were for making it through another week. The church is supposed to enhance our spirituality, but do we focus way too much on appearances and gossip? Danielle is a preacher’s kid, so growing up her life revolved around the church. Twice she moved because of her father’s profession, leaving her feeling very isolated at times. Though she has some positive experiences, she has more negative feelings towards what church has represented in her life. As a child of ministers, Danielle had to deal with the spotlight being on her and often felt pressured to be perfect. Mel talks about what it’s like growing up in a megachurch. Mel saw some things in the church that bothered her, but she had an overall positive experience. Her main question is, “Why is there always a building fund for the roof, but the roof is never getting fixed?”. Danielle defiantly gets triggered in this episode, but luckily Mel is there to calm her down. Haha. Of course, we still have fun and laugh. We both believe that there is a huge difference between being spiritual and being religious. --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/allegedly-credible/message

How much access should we let people have to us? We often over-extend ourselves at work, at home, and in our relationships. We can find it hard to say no, especially to our loved ones. There is often a lot of pressure for us to show up and be present for others when we are barely showing up for ourselves. Today we talk to our friend Sara, and the pressures she has been under as a teacher while dealing with this pandemic. It has been hard for her to set clear boundaries for work, especially while working from home. Danielle talks about how she had to take a step back from her family in order to find herself more clearly. When she didn’t have clear boundaries set, she started to feel resentful and she no longer wanted to feel that way. Mel talks about how she often overextends herself for others and often doesn’t realize how much it can stress her out until it’s too late. As a wife and mother, Mel talks about how she had to learn how to establish new boundaries within her new family dynamic. We think it is always healthy to evaluate just how much of your time and energy you give to other people. --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/allegedly-credible/message

Oh boy, get ready! In this episode we are discussing if it is possible to be friends with an ex? There are some very strong opinions about this subject. So strong, we invited our close friend Evie on the show to have a really deep conversation about this topic.    A lot of people would agree with Evie, and say absolutely not. Once the relationship is over, that’s it. There is no need to pursue a friendship with someone that hurt you in the past. Others would argue (mainly Danielle), that though something didn’t workout romantically, it doesn’t mean that you guys can’t be really good friends after some personal space and separation.      Should you try to stay friends with someone that was emotionally, physically, or mentally abusive? Absolutely not. However, we explore other reasons some people decided to stay friends with an ex and if it’s even a good idea.     No matter what your view point is on the case of the ex, we’re here to offer you new perspectives. Ultimately, you have to do what’s best for you and your mental health.  --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/allegedly-credible/message

  We’ve all had those moments when we look in the mirror and aren’t satisfied with what you see. You can spend countless hours trying to find something that looks flattering on you, but it seems like nothing you put on looks right. We are our harshest critics, but society standards of beauty also play a major role on how we view and see ourselves.    For us personally, there are things we struggle with on a daily basis. Mel has issues with they way her body is forever changing during her pregnancies. She also grew up feeling uncomfortable in her skin due to growing up in predominantly white areas. Danielle has struggled with her weight her whole life. Even though she has lost a good amount of weight now, she still often finds herself uncomfortable with her body.    Despite all of this, we make it a point to stay as positive as possible and embrace ourselves, flaws and all. There are way more positive things about us that make us unique. So today, we want to give you some pointers on how we keep smiling even when we aren’t feeling the greatest about ourselves. --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/allegedly-credible/message

Happy Mother’s Day to all the wonderful moms out there! Since today is Mother’s day, we figured today is the perfect day to talk about being pregnant and what all comes along with it. Danielle has never experienced this, so we decided to have a special guest on to contribute to this conversation. Our guest today is Barbie Hall, also known as Sista Goose. She is a mother of two, a Christian Fiction author, and founder of Black Girls Inc and Black Men’s Inc. She uses her platform to promote books and authors of color. She also is in the works of creating Black Kids Inc to promote children’s books so that kids can see themselves represented in the stories they read. Her new book, Bless this Mess: Ruth (Vol. 1) is available for pre-order. Today, Barbie and Mel get real candid and honest about their child-bearing experiences. Adjusting to a new body, hormonal, and emotional changes can be challenging during this time. Both had some difficulties during their pregnancies, as well as issues with their deliveries. Though Mel and Barbie love being mothers, there are some things they wished they knew beforehand. We are going to warn you now, emotional moments do occur in this episode. Don’t let this scare you though, we still laugh a lot! --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/allegedly-credible/message