Pardon the Mess with Courtney DeFeo
Pardon the Mess with Courtney DeFeo
Courtney DeFeo and Christian Parenting
As parents, we know raising kids is the opposite of neat and tidy. Each day brings wins, losses and valuable lessons. Pardon the Mess is a place where we discuss parenting and faith in a biblical, approachable and relatable way. We may cry and laugh while we learn and grow together in our beautiful mess. Pardon the Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. To find practical and spiritual advice to help you grow into the parent you want to be visit www.ChristianParenting.org
BONUS: Marked by Endurance
“Do you not know that in a race all the runners run, but only one gets the prize? Run in such a way as to get the prize.” —1 Corinthians 9:24 The Christian life is more like a marathon than a sprint, requiring significant endurance if we’re going to make it through the obstacles we face along the way. From the day we accept Christ until we see him face-to-face, we’re continually building up endurance so we can best run the race set out for us. Having endurance in the context of our faith means we’re always in training mode, getting ready for the hard places of discouragement and suffering that will challenge our readiness for the race. We build up our endurance practically by staying true to the basics: things like spending daily time with God, finding Christian community, memorizing Scripture, and seeking discipleship. What a GIFT to have author and speaker (and track coach) Dorina Gilmore-Young on with us chatting about endurance. I absolutely loved her perspective as a widow, mom and coach - how endurance is something God produces in our kids through trials. We can pray for that process - that they may endure life’s hardships with Jesus as their strength. Let’s challenge our kids to run well so they will hear Jesus say at the finish line, “Well done, my good and faithful servant” (Matthew 25:23). Lord, before you created even one of us, you set us apart for your purposes. Give [name] the endurance to run the race you have planned for their life. Help them to stay the course when they run up against obstacles along the way, reminding them of the importance of putting in the daily work so they are prepared for anything they face.God’s word speaks: Philippians 3:14; Romans 5:3–4; 2 Timothy 4:7; Hebrews 10:36Our Sponsors:* Check out BetterHelp : betterhelp.com/MESS* Visit HomeThreads.com/MESS today and get a 15% off code for your first order!Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy
Apr 28
12 min
Is private school better than public school? With Terry Ann Kelly
Pardon the Mess is sponsored by BetterHelp.Are you struggling with where your child should go to school? This common fear and worry can grip us all. We want so desperately to make the right choice for each of our kids. It can also be confusing when your friends all have different opinions on the matter or maybe your spouse is in disagreement with your plan. You will feel extremely encouraged by today’s episode with Terry Ann Kelly. She has practical advice for these decisions as well as grounding truths to calm our hearts. She is a grandmother, wife and mom and has many years of experience with schools. As the founder of Students Standing Strong, she has seen first hand that God can do anything with any child and any school.My favorite part is the story she shares about her son at the end. It is so refreshing to hear a very personal example of how God can use each of our kids in the most powerful ways at school every day. In this episode we chat about: How to seek God in tough school decisionsHow to bring your faith into the public school settingHow to call your kiddos higher in loving their classmatesEnjoy!Connect with Pardon The Mess:Christian ParentingPardon The Mess Courtney DeFeoResources from today’s show:Students Standing StrongMoms, Dads, and Grads Gift GuidePardon the Mess is sponsored by BetterHelp.Our Sponsors:* Check out BetterHelp : betterhelp.com/MESS* Visit HomeThreads.com/MESS today and get a 15% off code for your first order!Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy
Apr 24
39 min
BONUS: Marked by our Strength
“Each of you should use whatever gift you have received to serve others, as faithful stewards of God’s grace in its various forms.” —1 Peter 4:10 As we wrap up the greatest commandment, we’re focused on how to love God with all of our strength. Contrary to how it sounds, loving God with all of our strength is not a reference to our physical strength. The Hebrew word used for strength in the context of the greatest commandment is me’od, which is translated as “much” or “very.”Loving God with all of our strength is loving God with our “much-ness.” It’s using our possessions, our time, our talents, our parenting, our volunteering—everything we’ve got—to love God and live for him. Said differently, wherever the Lord has planted you and with whatever resources he’s provided, use all your strength to love him smack-dab in the middle of it all.As we pray for our kids to love God with all of their strength, we’re praying that they use all of their party-planning skills, math aptitude, athleticism, and social media acumen for God’s greatest glory. It’s taking the seemingly small places in their life and asking the Lord to use it in every possible way for his bigger purposes.Spend time this week asking the Lord to use your kids’ gifts to bring God glory. Pray that he uses them for his greater purposes right where he has them, teaching them to love the Lord with all of their much-ness and strength.Lord, thank you for all the gifts and talents you’ve given our family. I pray that you will guide my children to use these gifts generously for your glory. With all of the much-ness you’ve given [name], remind them to serve those around them as they learn to love you with all of their strength.  God’s word speaks: Hebrews 13:16; Proverbs 11:24–25; Deuteronomy 16:17; Colossians 3:23Our Sponsors:* Check out BetterHelp : betterhelp.com/MESS* Visit HomeThreads.com/MESS today and get a 15% off code for your first order!Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy
Apr 21
14 min
How can our kids keep their faith in college? with Campbell Stites
Pardon the Mess is sponsored by BetterHelp.It’s not often you get to interview a college kid about growing up as a Christian. The Stites are family friends of ours and a family we admire and respect so very much. I am often asking them for advice since they are ahead of the game by a few years. Today’s episode is a chat with their son, Campbell, who is studying political science at Texas A&M University. He has always been a leader and I have absolutely loved watching God grow his faith during his first year in college. He’s making some wise choices that we can all learn from.My favorite part of the episode is when he encourages parents to get interested in their child's interests. He shares about how his mom invested in his interests and helped foster a super close mom/son relationship. In this episode we discuss:How to make faith a priority in collegeThe power of friends and your circleHow to let boys have freedom vs controlling themThe gift of allowing your teens to failConnect with Pardon The Mess:Christian ParentingPardon The Mess Courtney DeFeoResources from today’s show:Moms, Dads, and Grads Gift GuidePardon the Mess is sponsored by BetterHelp.Our Sponsors:* Check out BetterHelp : betterhelp.com/MESS* Visit HomeThreads.com/MESS today and get a 15% off code for your first order!Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy
Apr 17
24 min
BONUS: Marked by our Mind
“We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ.” —2 Corinthians 10:5 As we pray for our kids to love God with all of their minds, we have to consider that our mind is made up of our thoughts. So, in order to love God with all of our minds, we have to think about what fills our minds and how it impacts the way we love God.Our thoughts are significant because they have the potential to grow our love for God or distract and pull us away from a relationship with him and his great plans for our life. The Enemy loves to get a hold of our thoughts and make us question God’s goodness and protection in our life.For our kids to love God with all of their minds, we’re praying that they “take captive” all the thoughts that are destructive, not instructive. This process of taking captive their thoughts is accomplished by knowing God’s word so that their thoughts are weighed against the truth of Scripture. It also comes by considering what’s going into their minds and how that’s fueling (or lessening) their love for God. It’s praying that they evaluate the movies they watch, the music they listen to, and the voices they allow to speak into their lives. Since our kids’ thoughts have the greatest impact on loving God with all of their minds, let’s take time to pray over their thoughts and ask God to help them take each one captive. Lord, teach us to love you in all of the different areas of our life, including our minds. If our minds are made up of our thoughts, teach us to take captive our thoughts and bring them in line with your truth. Be with [name], helping them to guard what they allow into their minds so that it always honors you.God’s word speaks: Isaiah 26:3; Jeremiah 33:3; Colossians 3:2–3; 1 Peter 1:13Our Sponsors:* Check out BetterHelp : betterhelp.com/MESS* Visit HomeThreads.com/MESS today and get a 15% off code for your first order!Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy
Apr 14
13 min
How to approach God when you have anger, doubt and frustration with Adrienne Camp
What a treat to talk to Adrienne Camp about how she is trusting God with her kids.  Adrienne “Adie” Camp, a South African singer and songwriter, was the lead singer of the Christian rock band The Benjamin Gate before launching her solo career. She is married to fellow musician Jeremy Camp, whom she met on tour in 2002. They have been married since 2003 and have two daughters, Bella and Arie, and one son, Egan. Throughout this entire episode, you will hear Adrienne’s heart to connect people in a very tangible way with Jesus. However, she acknowledges that we don’t always feel excited about that. Sometimes, we are sitting in a real place of doubt, frustration and disbelief. No matter where you are on your faith journey (or your kids) - I think you will feel so encouraged by Adrienne’s words and wisdom. In this episode we discuss:The desire to protect our kids from mistakesThe real grief experienced when you launch a child Getting honest with God - all our feelings and emotions included doubt and angerConnect with Pardon The Mess:Christian ParentingPardon The Mess Courtney DeFeoResources from today’s show:As For Me - Adrienne’s latest bible study on Psalms Even Me - Adrienne’s book with her girls about their journey to AfricaAdrienne Camp’s Instagram Pardon the Mess episode with Jonathan and Peta PittsChristian Parenting Store (15% off with coupon PODCAST2024)Our Sponsors:* Check out BetterHelp : betterhelp.com/MESS* Visit HomeThreads.com/MESS today and get a 15% off code for your first order!Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy
Apr 10
33 min
BONUS: Marked by our Soul
“What good is it for someone to gain the whole world, yet forfeit their soul?” —Mark 8:36Loving God with all of our soul sounds very important, but what exactly is our soul?Our soul lies deep down inside of us and is our very core. It’s the invisible part of us that connects us with God. It is where we are most at home, and it’s the most fundamental driver of who we are from the inside out. If you strip away all of our outward actions and how we choose to portray ourselves (or how others may define us), the soul is our truest self.To love the Lord with all of our soul, we’ve got to be faithful in private. We’ve got to be devoted to the things that drench our soul in Jesus and be willing to drop the things that don’t. It’s spending time in prayer confessing what’s in our soul, not just in our mind. As we pray for our kids to love God with all of their souls this week, let’s pray that they learn to love him with the very core of who they are—not by what they intellectually believe about him, or how they serve him, or what they communicate to others by their faith, but truly learning to love Jesus from the core of their being. Pray for the Lord to reveal the depths of their soul and teach them how to love him with all that they are. Lord, we confess to spending a disproportionate amount of time worrying about our earthly bodies, usually at the expense of our soul. Please teach [name] how to love you from their very core, giving priority to the only part of us that will live eternally. God’s word speaks: Psalm 119:81; Psalm 63:8; Deuteronomy 4:29; Matthew 10:28Our Sponsors:* Check out BetterHelp : betterhelp.com/MESS* Visit HomeThreads.com/MESS today and get a 15% off code for your first order!Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy
Apr 7
20 min
When you are beyond tired (soul exhausted) and don’t know how to get rest with Jess Connolly
I am taking a guess that 100% of us are exhausted. And this is beyond the physically tired feeling. You all will love the encouragement and wisdom on today’s episode by Jess Connolly. I have always loved her teaching and preaching - because she balances compassion and truth so well. She doesn’t leave us sitting in the challenges - she provides biblical, practical and realistic ways we can move forward in this issue.This idea of burnout and an unsustainable pace is not new information. We know we are in it but are not sure why or how to stop it as parents? So what do we do? Tune in to this week’s podcast chat with Jess - you won’t feel shame - you will feel equipped and encouraged to do the hard work of rest. We all know our souls are crying for it.I was so absolutely amused at the start of our conversation when I asked her about her cold plunge obsession. Is anyone else into the idea of purposely jumping into ice cold water? She actually gives a pretty compelling case to try it.Jess’ story of emotional, physical and spiritual breakdownHow to tend to your soul and stop feeling so defeated How to break the cycle of surviving vs thriving How can we respond to God’s invitation to restConnect with Pardon The Mess:Christian ParentingPardon The Mess Courtney DeFeoResources from today’s show:JessConnolly.comTired of Being Tired - Jess’ new bookRaising Mentally Strong KidsChristian Parenting store (15% off with coupon PODCAST2024)Our Sponsors:* Check out BetterHelp : betterhelp.com/MESS* Visit HomeThreads.com/MESS today and get a 15% off code for your first order!Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy
Apr 3
32 min
BONUS: Marked by Our Heart
“Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength.” —Mark 12:30 Remember the lawyer who tried to trick Jesus by asking him to name the greatest commandment? (Lawyers, am I right?) Jesus, knowing this guy’s antics, responded with, “Love God with all of your heart, soul, mind, and strength.” If we break it down, what does it look like to love God with all of our heart? Our heart is not just critical to our health; it’s also the epicenter of our spiritual life. It’s central to our thoughts and actions, where we spend money, and even the words that come out of our mouths. When Jesus talks about loving God with all our heart, he’s referencing our emotions and decisions. In order for us to love God with all of our hearts, we have to prioritize spending time with him and in his word. When we spend time with God, we start wanting to do the things that are pleasing to God and we care about the things that he cares about. Having time with our creator enables us to know what he wants for our lives, and we can’t help but pursue him and the things he values and wants for our families. Let’s pray this week that our kids learn to love God with all of their hearts, beginning with prioritizing time with him and pursuing him in all that they do. Lord, teach us to show our love for you, not just with our words, but with our lifestyle. Lead [name] to prioritize time in your word and learn to pursue you in all that they do. Remind us that loving you means also loving our neighbor. Make us aware of the needs we can meet around us. God’s word speaks: 1 John 4:7–8; 1 Corinthians 13:13; John 13:34; 1 John 4:19Our Sponsors:* Check out BetterHelp : betterhelp.com/MESS* Visit HomeThreads.com/MESS today and get a 15% off code for your first order!Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy
Mar 31
9 min
What do I do with my life? How to pursue your gifts while feeling trapped and unseen with Brooke Warnock
There’s not a day that goes by that I do not hear these same sentiments from a mom. And I have been there many times.I feel so lost.I don’t know what to do with my life.I feel overlooked and unseen.I feel like I don’t dream or use my gifts.In this episode, I get the pleasure of having a real life heart chat with my friend (and my Life Plan Coach) Brooke Warnock. She shares about her journey of raising 5 kids on a ranch - while wanting to use her unique gifts for the Lord. It can be a huge struggle for all of us.My favorite part is how honest she is about the struggle of using your gifts and raising kids. She will make you feel so seen as she shares her journey. I pray you feel so very encouraged that this is not the end of your story. In some ways, the motherhood years are just the beginning. If you don’t have your exact calling and purpose figured out - do not feel discouraged. I pray you never forget that God will use every bit of you and your giftings to raise those kids and build your home. In this episode we discuss: What to do when you feel trapped and unseen at homeHow to bring your gifts and talents into your home, not just your vocationHow to dream and redefine your life while embracing the seasons of parentingWhat is wrong? What is right? What is confused? What is missing?Connect with Pardon The Mess:Christian ParentingPardon The Mess Courtney DeFeoResources from today’s show:BrookeWarnock.comBrooke’s free assessmentLifePlan with BrookePaterson LifePlanLost Valley RanchIf GatheringBlue Zones DocumentaryRaising Mentally Strong KidsOur Scripture Affirmation Cards are the perfect gifts for your kid’s Easter Baskets!Brooke’s challenge to ask these questions:What is wrong? What is right? What is confusing? What is missing?Our Sponsors:* Check out BetterHelp : betterhelp.com/MESS* Visit HomeThreads.com/MESS today and get a 15% off code for your first order!Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy
Mar 27
55 min
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