October 21, 2019
You fear that you will end up alone...without ever truly understanding what went wrong. Your mate's infidelity takes an unbearable toll on your heart. How did it start? Does it end?You want to understand what’s happening and how your marriage can survive this affair.In this episode of Marriage Helper Live, Dr. Joe Beam explains why spouses cheat. He also shares the one essential thing you must do if you wish to save your marriage.This program airs live from 12:30 p.m. to 1:30 p.m. (central) on Monday, October 21, 2019.if you wish to speak to Dr. Beam about your situation, call 657-383-0812 during the program or watch live
October 14, 2019
Sometimes you think you've lost your mind. Other times you know in your heart that it's true. The one you love is abandoning you. Slowly, yet surely, leaving you for someone else.Are you insane in thinking this? Or are your fears evolving into a horrible reality?How can you tell? How can you know for sure?Part of you doesn't want to know because when you do you may have to face a reality that you don't want. But part of you has to end this torture.In this program, Dr. Joe Beam gives you five questions to find the truth. He also shares what you can do if your spouse is cheating. Dr. Beam also takes your questions. To speak with him directly about your situation, call 657-383-0812 during the program.This program airs live from 12:30 p.m. to 1:30 p.m. (Central) on Monday, October 14, 2019.Watch live at SUBSCRIBE NOW TO THIS YOUTUBE CHANNEL FOR MANY MARRIAGE AND RELATIONSHIP VIDEOS.
September 30, 2019
Your spouse loves someone else.Why? Is it that they no longer love you? Has the other person somehow lured them away? Why does your spouse want them? The answer may surprise you. Do you want to understand why this happened to you...what your spouse is going through...why they've changed so much?In this program, Dr. Joe Beam answers these questions and explains how you can have hope to rescue your marriage even if it appears there is no hope.After explaining infidelity, Dr. Beam takes your questions. To speak with him directly about your situation, call 657-383-0812 during the program. This program airs live from 12:30 p.m. to 1:30 p.m. (Central) on Monday, September 30, 2019.Watch live at
September 23, 2019
Join Us For Marriage Helper LIVE! Call For A Chance To Speak With Us One-On-One!
September 16, 2019
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September 9, 2019
Join Us For Marriage Helper LIVE! With Dr. Joe Beam!
September 3, 2019
Join Us For Marriage Helper LIVE! Call For A Chance To Speak With Us One-On-One!
August 26, 2019
Join Us For Marriage Helper LIVE! Call For A Chance To Speak With Us One-On-One!
August 19, 2019
Join Us For Marriage Helper LIVE! Call For A Chance To Speak With Us One-On-One!
August 12, 2019
On today's live show, Dr. Joe Beam and Kimberly Holmes speak with callers about the following questions:  “My wife is angry because I requested child support. How can I respond in the best way?""Can my spouse revert to a previous stage of limerence?""My husband lost his job, became depressed, and got in an emotional affair. What can I do while my husband is 'figuring it out'?""My husband won't speak to me. How can I create conversations with him in a productive way without pushing?""Is my marriage worth saving?""Do positive changes in my behavior push him away even more?""How do I tell my cheating husband how I feel?"
August 5, 2019
On today's live show, Dr. Joe Beam speaks with callers about the following questions:  “What do I do when my husband doesn't know what he wants?""What can I do to win my wife back? Is NO contact good?""Should I let my wife go or fight to save her?""What do I do when my wife is emotionally 'gone'? What can I do to let her know I'm here for her?""Is it a good idea for us to be romantic during her affair?""I've done all the wrong things. What do I do now?""We tried to reconcile, but he keeps going back to her.""How do I get my wife to trust me again?"
July 29, 2019
On today's live show, Dr. Joe Beam and Kimberly Holmes speak with callers about the following questions:  “How can I save my marriage after we separated?""I feel like my husband is just coming to the workshop to appease me. Should I still come to the workshop?""How do I reconnect with my wife once I move closer to her?""How do I use SMART contact without business items?""How do you let go of a marraige when you have been divorced for a year?""Should we avoid family while trying to work on our marriage?""Is the workshop the best tool to help us save our marriage?""Is it necessary to talk about my husband's affair partner?""How can I respond when he says I'm controlling?""I'm changing by doing my PIES. Could that backfire?"
July 22, 2019
On today's live show, Dr. Joe Beam and Kimberly Holmes speak with callers about the following questions:  “I've been doing SMART contact for two weeks. When should I contact my spouse about non-business items?""I feel distant from my spouse during our separation. How do I use SMART contact with an introverted spouse?""My wife is unaware of her limerence. How can I bring it up?""How do I bring my spouse back when they'd rather be alone?""We've been separated for a year. Is intimacy during separation a good idea?""My son attempted suicide because of father's affair.""Wife now with a controlling affair partner. What can I do?"
July 15, 2019
On today's live show, Dr. Joe Beam and Kimberly Holmes speak with callers about the following questions:  “If my wife moves back but is still involved with her affair partner, what kind of boundaries should I set?""Will intervention stop limerence from continuing?""No contact for a year. How can I start the conversation?""How can I get my wife to talk to me?""My husband separated from me so he can 'miss me and fall in love with me' again. How do we fix things?""My husband is still having an affair, but he is still intimate with me. He says he cannot connect emotionally with me. What can I do?""Husband has more in common with his affair partner than with me. I want to save the marriage, but he does not want to. How can I save the marriage?""Husband is seeking group sex. Is this normal behavior for a person in limerence?"
July 8, 2019
Marriage Helper LIVE
July 1, 2019
On today's live show, Dr. Joe Beam and Kimberly Holmes speak with callers about the following questions:  “Should I tell my wife I lover her and want to make it work before our court hearing date?""Now that my husband is home, what do I do?""Do I keep trying to save our marriage or give up?""Is it possible to reconcile after 5 years of reconciliation?""Can limerence happen with the same person more than once?""What can I do to get my wife to come back?""How do I control my emotions to be who she needs me to be?"
June 24, 2019
On today's live show, Dr. Joe Beam speaks with callers about the following questions:  “How do I keep standing for my marriage when I want to give up?""When should I ask my spouse to come to the workshop?""Can I save the marriage when my wife doesn't want to?""My husband is contemplating divorce. How do I talk to him?""How can I avoid PUSH behaviors while living with my spouse?""Husband got affair partner pregnant, but he still loves me. What do I do?""How can my husband and I move past our previous affairs?"
June 17, 2019
Live Caller Q&A With Kimberly Holmes & Amber Nickle In this podcast, Kimberly Holmes & Amber Nickle address these questions: "How do I talk to my wife while avoiding PUSH behaviors?""How do I set boundaries to make our marriage better?""How do I voice my concerns without sounding controlling?""Should I pursue answers ro wait for my wife to bring it up?""How do I get my husband to talk about our marriage?""Is my husband having an affair and not telling me?
June 10, 2019
Live Caller Q&A With Kimberly Holmes & Jim Pourteau.  In this podcast, Kimberly Holmes & Jim Pourteau address these questions: "My wife is sending mixed signals. Should I start no contact?""When should I stop trying to save my marriage?""How do I ask my reluctant spouse to come to the workshop?""How do I start reconciliation the right way?""Should I tell my teenage son about our marriage situation?""Wife diagnosed me as a narcissist. What do I do?""How do I handle my husband's vacillation?"
June 3, 2019
Marriage Helper LIVE
May 13, 2019
On today's live show, Dr. Joe Beam speaks with callers about the following questions:  “Married for 41 years. ography use throughout marriage. Wife left unexpectedly. How do I save my marriage?”“My husband and I have been married for 6 years. Husband ‘can’t live this way anymore.’ I have confidence our relationship work, but he is not sure that he wants it to. How do I get past the strong emotions to do the things I need to do?”“I found out a year ago my wife had been in an affair for 18 months. We still live together. She has filed for divorce, but she is not actively moving forward with it. Is it smart for me to require coaching as criteria if we are going to stay together?”“My husband is having an affair with his coworker. He agreed he would not introduce children to affair partner. He wants our kids to meet her kids at work picnic. How do I talk to him about this without pushing?”“Wife had affair. I am moving 800 miles away for a job. What can I do from that far away to show her I still want her to be a part of my life?”“Wife recently moved out, and she took kids with her. She doesn’t love me anymore. I did too many push behaviors. How  will she notice me working on my PIES when she only focuses on the kids?” You’ll also hear about: Affair addictionPIESHow to pick a good counselor
May 6, 2019
On today's live show, Dr. Joe Beam speaks with callers about the following questions:  “My wife left me for our children’s music teacher. She is in another country. She is vilifying me. How do I save my marriage?”“Coming out of the end of a midlife crisis with limerence involved. How do I save my marriage?”“My husband of 25 years left me. He filed for legal separation. Is intervention a good option to bring him to talk?”“My husband had an affair after being married for 28 years. We haven’t talked in a long time. I want to share my heart. What do I do?”“My wife left me for my best friend after 8 years of marriage. Would you suggest that I stay in SMART contact or interfere with SMART contact to try to get her to attend the workshop?”“My husband is having an emotional affair with a coworker. He is confused on what to do. What should I do?” You’ll also hear about: SMART ContactPush behaviors
April 29, 2019
On today's live show, Dr. Joe Beam speaks with callers about the following questions:  “What is the success rate for the workshop?”“How do I navigate SMART contact with my husband and know when it is time to talk about our relationship?”“How can I increase my communication with my husband as he does not talk to me? He just wants the marriage to be over.”“I have been separated from my wife for about two months. Since we’ve been separated, she says I haven’t showed her any reasons to fight for the marriage. How do I show her I want to save the marriage?”“Separated for a year. I feel like all hope is lost. 9 year old child is involved. I don’t know what to do anymore.”“Problematic marriage. Go through periods of being separated and being together. We have a lack of intimacy and connection. How do I break down that wall?”“Basically roommates with my spouse. I am sleeping in the living room. I’m working on my PIES. How do I put my marriage back together?”
April 22, 2019
On today's live show, Dr. Joe Beam speaks with callers about the following questions:  “My husband had an affair, but wants to end it and come back home. He is afraid that his affair partner will harm herself if he leaves her. How do I help him navigate that?”“His family invited me to celebrate Easter with them, but other people are telling me I shouldn’t go. What should I do?”“My wife and I got in an argument, and she told me she is done. We’re still living in the same house. I don’t know what to do.”“I found my wife texting another man, and I told her to get out. She told me she wants a divorce. She says she misses me, but she is dating other men. She wants us to sell our house. What can I do to have her take a second to think about her decision?”“My wife is with another person, and he is trying to make himself a father figure to our children after only two months. Should I expect this to be a temporary phase, or should I be concerned that this person is going to be the step-father of my children?”“My husband and his affair partner had a baby. He is also the father of my child. I still love him, but he has cut off contact with me. At the least, how can I make him co-parent my child instead of having no contact?”“Since my husband began his affair, could it have evolved into love instead of limerence? How do I do SMART contact when he is so hostile and mean to me?”
April 15, 2019
On today's live show, Dr. Joe Beam speaks with callers about the following questions:  “My husband wants to move back in part time, but he doesn’t seem committed. If he’s not committed, I don’t know if I show let him move back in. Do you think I should let him move back in part time?”“My wife said she was adamant about wanting a divorce, but it has been 6 months without her acting on it. I want to give her a timeline of when she needs to make a decision by. How long should I give her to decide?”“My wife and I are separated, but we are starting to hang out a lot. She recently told me she never sees us getting back together. What can I do to positively influence my situation?”“My wife agreed to work on our relationship, but a week later she told me she wants a divorce. She keeps changing her mind. I’m really confused, and I don’t know what to do.”“I jumped into the relationship with my current husband quickly after ending my relationship with my ex-husband. He treats me well, but I don’t have the feelings for him that I should.”“How can I show my wife unconditional love while separated without seeming too pushy?”“My husband said he regrets his affair, but he has a vacation scheduled with his affair partner. It is always so back and forth. Why should I try to save my marriage when he keeps going deeper in his relationship with the other woman?”“My daughter is in limerence with a man who left his wife to be with her. The relationship has changed her completely. We do not support her relationship, but we love her very much. My friends are telling me that we should tell her we accept the relationship so that she should come back home. I don’t know what to do.”
April 8, 2019
Join us for Marriage Helper Live. Every Monday at 12:30pm CST
March 25, 2019
On today's show, Dr. Joe Beam along with Client Representative, Marc Highland discuss the following:  "I had an affair and I would like to work with my wife on our marriage. How is it possible to move past my emotional connection to the affair partner?" "My husband wants to work on the marriage, but he's still in deep, emotional limerence with someone across the world. How do I ask him about attending the Workshop without pressuring/manipulating him?""Did I do the wrong thing by confronting my wife about her past affair partner?"   You'll also hear about Things a person can do in order to get past an affair. The best way to approach your spouse about the workshop.
March 18, 2019
Join us for Marriage Helper LIVE! Dr. Joe Beam & co-host Amber Nickle will be speaking with you today!
March 11, 2019
On this episode of Marriage Helper live, you'll hear Dr. Joe Beam and live callers speak about: The difference between reconciliation & forgivenessWhat it means when a spouse says, "I'm done."How to (patiently) implement S.M.A.R.T. ContactMental disorders & how they affect reconciliation/repairing a marriage You'll also learn how to build trust over time with consistency in your actions (not perfection) and how to understand your spouse's emotions. Dr. Joe Beam explains "logic cannot overpower emtions...but you can overcome emotions with time and consistency in your actions."
March 4, 2019
On this episode of Marriage Helper Live, Dr. Joe Beam responds to: "My wife reacted negatively to this one situation where I did something that appeared controlling. How do I proceed? We've been separated 5 months, and this just happened one week ago."   "My husband is hesitant to return home because he doesn't want things to go back to how they were. How can I work on this issue? We've both had affairs."   "Is my wife experiencing cognitive dissonance while she's in her affair? She has become mean toward me, and removed herself from our grown children."   "My husband seemed to have positive interactions with me, and now all of the sudden, he still wants to go through with mediation- what do I do?"   And MORE!   You'll also hear about: How to renew your focus, especially with SMART ContactWhat "Vengeance Affairs" areCompartmentalized thinking within Cognitive Dissonance (and the 2 potential paths/outcomes)How to think and what to think when it seems like your marriage is about to end
February 25, 2019
In this episode you'll hear Dr. Joe Beam respond to live callers from our Marriage Helper Live Broadcast. Featured on this episode: "My wife is in a limerent affair. She's getting the best of both worlds by seeing her partner and then seeing me at home. Will she continue this affair if she doesn't know what consequences may happen? Should I tell her what the consequences are?"   "My husband has been in a 6 year affair. He's never filed for divorce. What is making the affair last so long? Are the PIES helping/hurting?"   "My husband and I are starting the reconciliation process. What does it look like? He keeps pushing back and isn't engaged."   "My husband moved back without any accountability in place (he had an affair before) was this the right thing to do?"   "My wife loves, but isn't in love with me. I'm getting accused of trying to force a relationship, but she's sending mixed signals. Can you give me direction on what to do?"   You'll also hear: How to manage the expectations you have for your spouseThe purpose of using the PIES
February 18, 2019
This episode opens with a story of HOPE alongside a story of familial reconciliation! Additionally, Dr. Joe Beam & Jim Pourteau respond to the following: "Is there less of a chance of a wandering spouse who is a woman to come back to the marriage?""Is long-term vilification normal?" "How can I be a "safe place" without being a doormat?" "How can I communicate with my wife when she doesn't want to talk? How do I deal w/anxiety that things may not get better?""I broke SMART contact with my husband- and we just started reconciling...what do I do now?""How do I establish trust with my Husband? He keeps snooping when I'm not doing anything wrong." You'll also learn...  How Marriage Helper defines vilificationWhat reconciliation looks like in real life and how to not overthink each daily interaction
February 11, 2019
Live Caller Q&A With Jim Pourteau. Call in and ask us a question about your marriage! In this Episode, Jim Pourteau speaks about how to build positive emotions and have positive communication with your spouse. He also explains how to approach SMART contact and being a "Safe Place" correctly.  Throughout this episode, Jim speaks with spouses who are "standing" for their marriages and gives helpful insight for their specific situations- which can help you too! How to go about SMART contact"How do I interact with my husband who is in limerence?"" I feel "stuck" in where my marriage is at with my husband. How do we move forward?""How can I be a "safe place" without endorsing my wife's behavior?""I learned I'm controlling. I've changed and want to save my marriage...but my husband doesn't want much to do with me. What do I do?"
January 14, 2019
Live Caller Q&A With Dr. Joe Beam & Kimberly Holmes. Call in and ask us a question about your marriage!
January 7, 2019
Live Caller Q&A With Dr. Joe Beam & Kimberly Holmes.  In this podcast, Dr. Joe Beam & Kimberly Holmes address these topics: Stops (Safegaurds That Offer Protection)Cores (Continuing Our Relaitonship Essentials)What to do when your huband leaves with no warningWhat is the Save My Marriage Course?How to move forward after caught in limerent affairHow to communicate while separated in different countries
January 2, 2019
Live Caller Q&A With Dr. Joe Beam & Kimberly Holmes. Call in and ask us a question about your marriage!
December 26, 2018
Live Caller Q&A With Dr. Joe Beam & Erin Hood.  In this podcast, Dr. Joe Beam & Erin Hood address these topics: “My husband and I are no longer on the same spiritual note. My husband wants to be intimate. Previously when we have not been intimate, there is no contact. When should I draw the line?”“My wife wants to move out and doesn’t want to be in our marriage anymore. She wants me to sell her engagement ring, and I respect her wishes, but I do not feel right about it. What should I do?”“Everyone keeps telling me I need to start the divorce proceedings. I’m not sure that is the best thing to do. I want more than anything to save my marriage.”“My husband came back home three weeks ago. I feel a little awkward, and I’m not sure to act around him now.”“My husband said he wants to leave because of the way I’ve been treating him. He is seeing someone else. How can I create interaction between us?”“Do I continue holding on to our marriage if he continues holding on to his relationship with his affair partner?”
December 17, 2018
Live Caller Q&A With Dr. Joe Beam & Kimberly Holmes In this podcast, Dr. Joe Beam & Kimberly Holmes address these topics: “I’m struggling with trying to study every single detail that happens between me and my husband. I want to put my marriage back together, but everything I do seems to pull it further apart. How do I change my negative behaviors and do positive things instead?”“My wife and I have struggled with intimacy for the last 12 years. How do I rekindle intimacy between us?”“My husband and I are trying to reconcile. Does the workshop help with reconciliation?”“My wife and I are struggling financially through our divorce process. I do not feel like selling our house is a good option, but it would alleviate our financial stress. What do you advise on that?”“My wife is struggling to forgive me. I want her to go to the workshop, but how do I get her to attend without her feeling controlled?”“When my daughter left home my husband completely changed and then had an affair. He keeps blaming me for everything. I don’t know what to do.”
December 3, 2018
Live Caller Q&A With Dr. Joe Beam & Kimberly Holmes. Call in and ask us a question about your marriage!
November 19, 2018
Live Caller Q&A With Dr. Joe Beam & Kimberly Holmes. Call in and ask us a question about your marriage!
November 12, 2018
Today, for the first time, we answer live callers during our live video broadcast. If you would like to join the show, be sure to find us on facebook at Marriage Helper. Every Monday we go live at 12:30pm CST. Please join our next show, because we'd love to have you and to help you!
March 11, 2018
Dr. Joe Beam has said many times that if your spouse is leaving you for another person that s/he "madly loves" it may be to your benefit to slow the divorce down. Why? Because those states of being "madly in love" (also known as limerence) have a shelf-life. That euphoria doesn't last a lifetime. By slowing down the divorce you may be able to rescue your marriage because the limerence wears off before the divorce is final. Now Dr. Beam is modifying that statement. He still believes that limerence will erode and that there can be value in slowing the divorce. However, in an effort to slow the divorce, some have done things that provoke their abandoning spouses in ways that aren't beneficial. Yes, Dr. Beam strongly believes that in a divorce you should get an attorney and fight for everything that you need, even if that thwarts your spouse's plans. If your spouse becomes angry, say something such as "I'm not the one wanting this divorce. I'm happy to work on the marriage if you are. In the meantime, I will follow my attorney's advice and take care of myself and my children. I'm sorry if that upsets you or doesn't give you everything you want, but I must do what I must do if you continue with the divorce." There is value in your spouse having to face the consequences of his behavior. However, being unreasonable, mean, or vindictive works against you rather than for you. It antagonizes your spouse without any correlating benefit to your mate or you. So where is the balance? In this program, Dr. Joe Beam and special guest Jim Pourteau talk about protecting yourself during a divorce while not being unfair or unreasonable in ways that only bring about negative consequences. We are are for marriages. Our success rate in helping crisis marriages solve their problems and save the marriage is three out of four. For our free resources ranging from articles, eBooks, and podcasts, see our website. If you wish to know more about our marriage coaching, call 615-472-1161.
March 4, 2018
Who To Listen To When Your Marriage Is In Trouble - The Dr. Joe Show The moment people hear that your marriage is in trouble, you get deluged with every sort of opinion, recommendation, and idea that people can come up with. Most of it is bad. Some of it is motivated by good intentions. However, if the ones who give the advice love you, they most likely aren't very happy with your spouse. Therefore, their viewpoint is skewed against him/her and very much toward protecting you (and maybe toward damaging your spouse). Others who aren't so close think their advice valid because of something they personally experienced or that they witnessed in another. That's enough for them to make judgments about you, your spouse, and your situation even when they know only a little of what's actually happening. These folks typically are adamant that you heed their counsel, although in reality their advice often is the OPPOSITE of what you should be doing. If you doubt that, post a problem on Facebook telling only the barest of information and watch how many people will tell you EXACTLY what you should do... It's scary... Even professional counselors may lead you astray IF: 1) Your situation strikes one of their own emotional chords 2) They decide to diagnose your spouse even though they've never met him/her (or had only limited exposure) 3) They feel the easiest route to your "happiness" is to end the marriage rather than to fight for it So, who do you listen to? In this program, Dr. Joe Beam and special guest Jim Pourteau discuss an actual occurrence on Facebook. Using it as the example, they explain why people tend to think their advice is valid and why you should be very careful about which advice you take. They guide you to sources that truly can help rather than leading you astray. If you're not looking only for people to verify what you WANT to do, but actually seeking help for your marriage problems, listen to this program. Also, check out free resources ranging from articles, eBooks, Podcasts, and more on
February 25, 2018
Your spouse strayed. Maybe it was another person. Maybe you threw him/her out because of their behavior. Whatever the cause, you're now trying to make it work again. But... You expect total honesty. You demand that s/he talk about the problem. You want to be understood and you want to understand why s/he did the things s/he did. You thought that reconciling would automatically bring about deep conversations, transparency, accountability, and finally a marriage better than it was before. Are those reasonable expectations? Yes. No. You see, it's all about timing. In this program Dr. Joe Beam and special guest Jim Pourteau discuss that when a couple think they are in reconciliation, many times they are actually in a step before that. No wonder they get frustrated; they're expectations don't match their reality. If you and your spouse are wanting to reconcile - even thinking that you are reconciling - this program will give you insight into what to expect, what NOT to expect, what is okay to demand and which demands may be a deal breaker IF they are made too early. If you wish more information about marriage that you can use, check out the free resources on If you wish to know more about the personal coaching that Dr. Beam and Jim discuss, call 615-472-1161.
February 19, 2018
Do those who fight for marriages ever think that a couple should divorce? Yes. At we fight for marriages. Since 1999 we've been able to help three out of four married couples in crisis resolve their seemingly insurmountable problems and save their marriages. It's known around the world that we do all we can to help marriages survive. Unfortunately, we know that not all marriages will. So when should one give up? Find the attorney and file for divorce? Is it when your marriage counselor says you should? Our experience says no. Good marriage counselors are worth their weight in gold. Others...well, let's just say sometimes it appears that some take the easy route and suggest divorce when there are still viable options for saving the marriage and making it good again. In this program, Dr. Joe Beam and special guest Jim Pourteau discuss how to know when it's time to call it quits. Both are experienced marriage helpers with a great deal of experience working with couples in crisis. Although they find tremendous fulfillment in helping couples who have no hope find hope, they each realize that sometimes a marriage will end. To learn the principles about when to end a marriage - if ever - listen to this program. Additionally, there are many free resources - articles, eBooks, podcasts, and more - for your marriage on
November 13, 2017
He had an affair that nearly ended the marriage. He told her he was sorry. He said he wanted them to try to work things out, but he's not quite ready to reconcile. Then he was offered a job in another city. It's lucrative and he accepted. He comes home every weekend to live with his wife and children. They have a great time. He's attentive. The kids love his being there. But then the weekend is over and he heads back. Workable? Maybe. However, there's a catch. During the week, he doesn't call, doesn't take calls, and has no contact whatsoever with his wife or children. They have great weekends. She wonders and worries about what he's doing during the week. It's driving her mad. Is he having another affair? Does he live with some woman over there? What is he doing that prevents him from calling, checking in...or being checked on? She offered an ultimatum of sorts. "I'll be gone when you come on the weekends. You and the kids have a great time but I can't live with not knowing." He told her that if she did that, he would feel pushed away and would give up on the idea of reconciliation. Is he manipulating her? Is there something else going on? What should she do? When should she do it? In this program, Dr. Joe Beam plays the recording of her question and then answers in detail. He suggests the things she needs to consider. He explains how to approach her husband in the way most likely to get him to understand and to start communicating during the week. He helps her think about the consequences if he refuses. If you or someone you know is in a similar situation - in a sort of limbo where the spouse seems to want to save the marriage but also seems not to - this program will help you understand what to do and the possible outcome of various ways of doing it. If your marriage is in trouble, take advantage of the free resources on If you need to talk with someone, call 615-472-1161 and ask about Marriage Helper's Certified Marriage Coaches. If you would like to record a question for Dr. Beam to answer in a podcast, go to
November 9, 2017
Her husband left her after thirty years of marriage. She feels lost. She wonders if her life is over. She doesn't know if she can ever be happy again. In the first podcast in this two-part series, Dr. Joe Beam brought in his special guest David Mathews, Director of SparkOfLife.Org. David is an expert in helping people deal with loss - any kind of loss, including the death of a loved one. The principles he provided in that podcast "Life Feels Hopeless After My Spouse Left" laid the foundation for this program. In this broadcast, David and Dr. Beam discuss practical, doable processes to help her - and you - deal with the loss and find healing for her life. That doesn't mean that she has to give up on her marriage. As Dr. Beam teaches in many podcasts, there is a process that can work to bring back the abandoning spouse and make the marriage good again. Even better than it was. isn't a guarantee. It is an amazing process. If anything works, this will work. Three out of four couples who attend Marriage Helper's intensive three-day workshop salvage their marriages and develop them to be better than they were before. Three out of four. But that's not four out of four. The practical information you will hear in this podcast will help you find healing and grow on to a meaningful and fulfilling life whether your spouse comes back or not. It's not magic. It takes work. But the result is again having a life of happiness. If you haven't listened to part one "Life Feels Hopeless After My Spouse Left," we suggest you find that podcast and listen to it first. As you listen to this one, take notes, think through the power of the process you will learn, and then put it into action. If your marriage is in trouble, take advantage of the free resources on If you need to talk with someone, call 615-472-1161 and ask about Marriage Helper's Certified Marriage Coaches. If you would like to record a question for Dr. Beam to answer in a podcast, go to
November 6, 2017
She met him when she was 16. They became childhood sweethearts through high school and married soon afterward. After thirty years of marriage, he left. Walked out stating that it was over and he wasn't coming back. She still loves him. Her heart is broken. She feels that her life as she has known it will never be again...that she'll never be happy...that she'll never get past the pain. Can she? Should she? Will she? In the program, Dr. Joe Beam interviews David Mathews, Director of SparkOfLife.Org. David is an expert on the pain of loss, the emotions one feels, and the path to healing. He and Dr. Beam discuss in detail why it is natural - and quite okay - for her to feel the pain she feels. However, the go beyond that. They provide an understanding of what she is going through. Then they explain the process she can choose to follow if she wants to heal her hurt and have a meaningful and fulfilled life. It isn't easy...pain never is...but it can be done and life can again have joy and happiness. Does that mean she gives up on trying to save her marriage? No. But it does mean there are processes she needs to embrace...processes to heal her hurt if he comes back...or if he doesn't come back. The principles David shares work for all types of loss, including the death of a loved one, but even to the pain of losing anything or anyone that is important to you. In the next podcast, David gives more information that is practical and doable. In this first installment, he lays the foundation that makes the healing possible. If your marriage is in trouble, take advantage of the free resources on If you need to talk with someone, call 615-472-1161 and ask about Marriage Helper's Certified Marriage Coaches. If you would like to record a question for Dr. Beam to answer in a podcast, go to
October 1, 2017
You spouse is involved with someone else. You love your mate and want to save your marriage. You heard about the amazingly effective system taught by Marriage Helper that works powerfully in helping people save their marriages. You went to and found the information. You paid close attention when Dr. Beam explained how to be a safe place for your straying spouse and you have tried to be that person in hopes of salvaging your marriage. You grasped that to allow your spouse to be open and transparent - even about his/her affair partner - can lead in time to the restoration of your marriage... But... You've discovered that being a safe p;lace isn't always easy. Allowing, even encouraging, your husband or wife to be open about the affair partner is painful to hear. As a matter of fact, you wonder if it might be doing more harm than good...especially for your own mental, emotional, and physical health. Should you stop? Is there another way? In this program, Dr. Joe Beam gives a brief overview of the section of the Marriage Helper system about being a safe place. He explains why "If anything will work, this system will." BUT, he also explains when it is time to stop being a safe understand why sometimes you can't continue to be the safe place...and how NOT to feel guilty if you stop being the safe place for your spouse. If you prefer to know more about the system before listening, you can find a tremendous amount of information on You can also find Marriage Radio podcasts on, on iTunes or Google Play by subscribing free to Marriage Radio, or on our online host On the Marraige website, you'll also find articles, eBooks, and more podcasts. If you need personal help to understand what, when, or how to do things that can save your marriage, call 615-472-1161 and ask about Marriage Coaching with Marriage Helper's Certified Marriage Coaches. If you'd like to leave a voice message for Dr. Beam to answer on these podcasts, you may do so at
September 24, 2017
He claimed that God told him to leave his marriage. Later he said that he felt guilt for leaving. He said "I love you but am not in love with you." Later he said, "I don't know how to live my life without you." Then, almost out of the blue, he says "I am in love with you" but he continues to live with the other woman. What do you do? Do you wait for him to evolve back to wanting to be with you over her? Do you go ahead and divorce him and get on with your life? In this program, Dr. Joe Beam, along with his special guest, relationship expert Jim Pourteau, answers the woman's question. You'll hear her describe the situation and ask what she should do. You'll hear the expert explanation of what is going on with her husband, You may be surprised when you hear the answer to her question about whether to divorce or to wait. For more free resources for your marriage go to You can also find more free podcasts by subscribing to Marriage Radio on iTunes or Google Play. You can find all of Dr. Beam's podcasts free on If you would like to speak to one of Dr. Beam's associates about your marriage, call 615-472-1161. Would you like to ask Dr. Beam a question about your marriage or relationship? You can record your question for Dr. Beam to reply in a future podcast at
September 11, 2017
Your spouse wants out of the marriage. You don't. You love your husband/wife and can't understand why s/he no longer loves you. Is there hope? Yes. Unfortunately, most people in your situation do the wrong things...things that in reality make it less likely you can put the marriage back together. In a previous podcast, Dr. Joe Beam and his special guest Jim Pourteau explained three things NOT to do if you want to save your marriage. In this program, they explain three things that you MUST do if you wish to keep your marriage alive. These are not three magic steps that guarantee your marriage will survive. They are three crucial things to understand and put into practice that will help you save your marriage if anything will. The odds? Excellent. Workshops for marriages in crisis that Dr. Beam developed have a 75% success rate even if one spouse wants out of the marriage and has absolutely no desire for it to continue. Join Dr. Beam and his special guest, relationship expert Jim Pourteau, for this eye-opening program that will equip you with the knowledge you need as well as direct you to the right help if you need help to save your marriage. For more resources, go to for free articles, eBooks, podcasts and more. You can also find over 100 podcasts by Dr Beam on iTunes and in Google Play. Subscribe free on those to Marriage Radio If you wish to ask a question for Dr. Beam to answer in future podcasts, record your question at
September 7, 2017
You just found out your spouse wants out of your marriage. You love your spouse. You don't want the marriage to end. WHAT SHOULD YOU DO?! Before knowing the 3 things you should do, it's very important to understand 3 key things you should NOT do if you are to have any hope for salvaging your marriage. Unfortunately, most people do one or more of these three and put their marriage into greater jeopardy. It's extremely important to know what they are, understand why they cause more problems, and why you should not do them...or stop doing them. In this program, Dr. Joe Beam and his special guest, relationship expert Jim Pourteau, discuss three key things to avoid. They explain what they are, why people do them, and why they have greater negative effect than positive. If you love your spouse but s/he does or says any of the following: - wants out of your marriage - says s/he no longer loves you...or that s/he never did - is involved with someone else - claims s/he just wants to be alone - is cold and distant - seems like a different person - is harsh and angry Then you need to hear this program...AND the next podcast in the series "3 Things To Do If You Want to Save Your Marriage." (available beginning Sep 11, 2017) For more marriage and relationship resources, go to or call 615-472-1161. To ask Dr. Beam a question to be answered in a future podcast, go to
August 13, 2017
Want to truly communicate? Be Understood? Understand? If so, there is one thing you MUST STOP from occurring in your conversations that matter AND USE a simple yet powerful system that will make it so much easier to understand and be understood. In this program Dr. Joe Beam explains why writing (especially texting and emails) don't work when you need to talk about things that matter. He also explains why phone calls usually don't work well either. Then how do you communicate? Dr. Beam shares his simple, yet powerful, "Triple A Engine" that turns frustrating conversations into unique interactions that meld two people together. He explains it and illustrates it so you can use it when discussing everything from money...hurt emotions...and even sexual disagreements when one partner wants something the other doesn't want to do. This same "Triple A Engine" works with your friends, children, parents, or anyone else with whom you need to communicate on more than a casual level. It is an especially important communication system for romantic love and marriage. If you are in love, want to be in love, or trying to rescue lost love, this system can lead you to levels of understanding, closeness, and intimacy that few people ever reach. For more information about relationships, go to If you have a relationship question that you would like Dr. Beam to answer in his podcasts, leave a recorded message at
August 7, 2017
"Why don't churches talk about sexual refusal?" he asked. He explained that his wife of 28 years quit being sexual with him some six years ago. She said she wasn't interested. He asked her to seek help; she replied that it was his problem. Now he's had enough. He's divorcing her. She's telling the folks at church that she has no idea why he's divorcing her and that he's a bad husband. He wants to go to those folks and tell them what's really going on. What should he do? Is there a solution? In this program Dr. Joe Beam relies not just on his PhD earned while researching marital and sexual satisfaction, but also on his Bachelor's degree and many hours of graduate courses in Bible. He explains what the Bible says about sexuality in marriage and points out a specific section that addresses directly the subject of sexual refusal in marriage. Dr. Beam points out to the caller that there may be an underlying problem that led to her not wanting to have sex with him...but that the man is correct that the Bible teaches sexually fulfilling each other. How does a couple resolve those issues? In this program, you'll learn the basic principles as well as how to find further help for making the sexual aspects of your marriage more fulfilling. For more information about marriage - especially marriage problems - check out the many free articles, podcasts, eBooks, and more on To ask Dr. Beam your question, you may record it at Then listen to these podcasts to hear Dr. Beam's answers and suggestions.
July 31, 2017
The caller says that her husband came back home after ending the affair. He's nicer, kinder, and more understanding than he was before the affair happened. His children love the change in him...his son now views his dad as his best friend. But... He won't change his cell phone number. He won't make any changes to his social media. His wife asks. He doesn't comply. Now she's worried that he's still involved with the other woman. Her friends aren't helping with their advice. As a result, she's pulling away from him. She asks what she should do. In this program Dr. Joe Beam answers her questions about what she should do to get her husband to do what she needs to help her feel more secure. He also explains what might be to her advantage to tolerate and what to do if she can't live with the fear of his continued involvement with the other woman. If you wish to leave a question for Dr. Beam to answer in these podcasts, you may record it at For articles, podcasts, and valuable information about marriages (especially problem marriages) go to
July 11, 2017
They were together for a decade before they decided to marry. It was wonderful; he told her how happy he was that she is his wife. They laughed. Had fun. Enjoyed life. Until the night he told her that he had found his "soul mate" and wanted his wife's permission to date this amazing new woman in his life. The wife, of course, was devastated. She still loves him. She's trying to find what suddenly went wrong...what she did...what he could love her so intensely and then, without warning, be "madly in love" with another. Listen to her story. Hear her pain. Understand her self-doubt. Then hear Dr. Joe Beam explain to her what limerence is. He addresses her concern that she was the problem. He helps her think through what likely happened. Most importantly, he gives her specific suggestions about what she should NOT do if she wants to salvage her marriage and what she MUST do if there is a chance of reconciliation. If you have a question for Dr. Beam, go to After you record your question or comment. We NEVER sell your information to anyone. We ask for your email in case Dr. Beam decides to respond directly to you.
July 3, 2017
Military marriages have the highest rate of divorce in America. Couple that with lots of anger, addiction, and separation...and there's plenty of reasons to divorce. Kimberly Holmes, CEO of Marriage Helper, and her husband Rob married while Rob was in the military. In the first year of marriage, they moved halfway around the world. In their second year of marriage, they separated for a year. In their third year of marriage, anger and addiction split them even further apart and their marriage was headed for divorce. Not the "newlywed years" that others had told them about. However, Rob and Kimberly overcame the odds and fought for their marriage. But not at the same time. Hear their story in this podcast and learn how they learned how to deal with anger, addiction, and being separated. Learn more about Marriage Helper at Or call 615.472.1161 or 866.903.0990
June 26, 2017
Is your spouse emotionally disengaged? Physically gone? Have you relentlessly tried searching, trying to figure out what you can do to bring your spouse back or make your spouse want to be in the marriage at all, only to find yourself completely overwhelmed? I understand. If you go to Google and type in "what to do to save a marriage" or "what to do to bring a spouse back", the information is insane. A lot of it contradicts the other, and if you try to implement some from here and some from there, then you'll find yourself frustrated and back at square one. We want to help make this easy for you. We have laid it out, and figured out the FIRST thing that you should do when trying to bring your spouse back. We teach you how in this episode. Be sure to listen, subscribe, and review to help us help more couples! Contact us to learn how we can help you save your marriage: 615.472.1161 or 866.903.0990
June 7, 2017
She's married to one but in love with another. She said she was Christian and spoke of her great love for God and amazing relationship with Jesus. She mentioned that she had prayed about what she was to do and in response God "told" her to divorce her husband and be with her lover...that He had sent her this lover and wanted her to be with him. She talked about how she had quit interacting with Christian people because they were mean and judgmental about her leaving her husband for another. She feels complete confidence that God answered her prayer for a wonderful marriage by providing the right man for a new marriage. Yes, she had slept with her lover, but God was fine with that also. "God is love. I feel love for him. Therefore, this is of God." Is it? In this program Dr. Joe Beam discusses whether God sends people lovers to replace their spouses. Dr. Beam usually approaches relationship questions from his educational and social science background. When he speaks, he refers to solid research as he gives relevant examples and replies to specific questions. However, because of this topic (and the questions he continues to receive about it) in this program he refers to Scripture. (Dr. Beam's Bachelor's degree is in Bible. He has more than 30 graduate hours in Bible.) He does give relevant examples, but he also reads verses and ask the listener to consider what they really say. If you are a Christian and in love with someone other than your spouse...or your Christian spouse is in love with someone other than you, this program will be a fascinating Bible study for you that can bring you peace.
May 25, 2017
Has your spouse cheated? Are your friends and family urging you to kick your mate out? Punish him or her? Get on with your life? But you find yourself wondering if that is what you should do. If your spouse wants to come back, should you allow it? If you do, can you have a good marriage again or will you always have problems with trust...hurt...maybe even self doubt? If your spouse is "in love" with someone else and doesn't want to come back, is your marriage over? Is there a way to put it back together? Even if there is, do you have the desire or the strength to go through your pain and make your marriage good again? In this program, Dr. Joe Beam provides the pros and cons of saving a marriage after infidelity. He explains the three types of extramarital affairs. He gives you the primary points to consider in deciding whether to take back a spouse who strayed...or to win back the spouse who is still straying. Find more information about why people stray, why they sometimes feel that they are "madly in love" with another, why it can be the best thing for your own life to salvage the marriage, and how it can be done when your spouse is sorry and wants to come back...and how it can be done when your spouse is convinced s/he's in love with someone else and doesn't want to come back.
May 16, 2017
Having trouble getting your spouse to talk? Maybe you are separated. Maybe you are living in the same house but your spouse doesn't want to talk to you and has completely shut down. This podcast will teach you the 3 things to get to encourage your spouse to talk.
April 12, 2017
You've prayed. Others have prayed with you...for you. Your children pour out their hearts. Yet, your marriage continues to spiral downward. Someone on TV tells you that if only you have enough faith, God will do whatever you ask. (Then s/he asks you for a check to prove your faith...) Well-meaning friends tell you that God is faithful if only you will continue to be...that He will bring about healing for your marriage...and that you should not doubt. However, time passes, your prayers change from petition to aggravation. Why isn't God listening? Why isn't He doing what you ask? As one lady recently said, "I'm done with God. I've given Him plenty of opportunity to change my husband and He's done nothing." Can God answer prayers about marriage? Does He? Does He care about your pain? Will He intervene in the messy situations of life in which we find ourselves? Will He change your husband or wife so that they stop doing the things hurting you, your children, your marriage...and even to themselves? Is God there??? To answer those questions and more, Dr. Joe Beam welcomes special guest Leighann McCoy. Leighann knows about REAL life. She survived cancer. She fought through major difficulties with her family. Leighann also knows God. She is a prayer warrior. She writes great books about prayer, spiritual warfare, especially spiritual warfare and families, and similar topics. ( She offers prayer courses - including three new free courses - on her website During this program, she joins Dr. Beam to discuss how people in crisis marriages should pray, what they should expect from God in return, and how to deal with God's answers. To speak with Leighann and Dr. Beam during the program, call 646.378.0424. The program airs live beginning at 9 p.m. Central time, Tuesday, April 11, 2017.
April 5, 2017
Are you controlling?  Really? Or is your spouse trying to manipulate you? S/he claims you're controlling because you're an obstacle to him or her doing whatever they wish. Maybe there's a combination. You have been controlling and now your spouse is using that to manipulate you into inaction by accusing you of being controlling now. If you are controlling, eventually that behavior will destroy your marriage. If you're being manipulated, backing off on a matter could make a clear path for your spouse to hurt you. If you have been controlling, but now you feel you must take a stand to stop your spouse from doing things detrimental to your marriage, stopping your stand might be the worst thing you can do. do you know?  What do you do? When do you back off and when do you take your stand? In this program, Dr. Joe Beam explains what control in a relationship is. He discusses why people control and how they can stop controlling. He also points out that sometimes there needs to be control...even if in the past your controlling behavior led to a current unpleasant situation.  Finally, Dr. Beam explains step by step how a person who has damaged his or her relationship with a spouse (or children) by controlling can overcome that and renew relationship...even save a marriage. For all those who listen to the program (and even if you skip the program!), Dr. Beam offers a free eBook about control that includes a thirty-question questionnaire to help you evaluate whether you're controlling or not. It is available at Listen at
March 29, 2017
No one wants to be treated as a child...especially by the person that is supposed to be our partner...our equal...our mate. We don't appreciate being told what to think, how to act, what to feel, or what to believe. Each of us craves being accepted and appreciated for who we we are. When we were children, we understood the need for an authority figure to guide us, teach us, and, sometimes, to command us. But we aren't children and we don't want our husbands or wives telling us what we must do, think, say, or feel to keep from being chastised or punished...or abandoned. I want...and deserve...a partner with whom I can have union based on love, NOT a relationship based on making him or her happy by yielding to nearly every way s/he thinks things should be done. In our work with marriages, we found that one of the most common reasons for major marital discord is a spouse who feels controlled, disrespected, or dominated by the other. Interestingly, often the dominating spouse doesn't believe s/he is being controlling. In this program, Dr. Joe Beam and Kimberly Holmes, CEO of Marriage Helper, explain why people control others and how they do it. More importantly, they explain how a person being controlled can put an end to that WITHOUT putting an end to the marriage. It won't stop on its own, but it can be stopped when the controlled spouse knows what to do. During the program Dr. Beam and Ms. Holmes offer free access to this free eBook about control. You may receive that free eBook whether you listen to the program or not by going to this link. The program is available now on, and
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