Pardon the Mess with Scarlet Hiltibidal - Christian Motherhood, Biblical Parenting, Raising Christian Kids
Pardon the Mess with Scarlet Hiltibidal - Christian Motherhood, Biblical Parenting, Raising Christian Kids
Scarlet Hiltibidal and Christian Parenting
As parents, we know raising kids is the opposite of neat and tidy. Pardon the Mess is a podcast for Christian moms who love Jesus, love their kids, and still feel behind on most days. Each week, host Scarlet takes one real parenting mess (morning meltdowns, discipline guilt, raising kind kids in a world that doesn't feel kind) and untangles it with honesty and grace, one small, faithful step at a time. No five-step systems. No longer to-do lists. Just clarity about what matters most and permission to let the rest go.Pardon the Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. To find practical and spiritual advice to help you grow into the parent you want to be visit www.ChristianParenting.org
Week 1: Fully committed to God
Today we are kicking off this year's series that follows Christian Parenting's brand new prayer journal. Inspired by the book of James, Faith in Action: Prayers from James for the Next Generation is a 38-week prayer journal designed to help you pray intentionally for your children all school year long.Each week includes a short devotional, Scripture passage, guided prayer, and space to write your own prayers as you ask God to help your kids develop a faith that stays strong through every season. Invest in your child's spiritual future one prayer at a time, and join thousands of parents & grandparents who are praying boldly for the next generation to know, love, and follow Jesus!In week one, we're starting in James 1:1: "James, a servant of God and of the Lord Jesus Christ, To the twelve tribes scattered among the nations: Greetings."Let's pray that our kids:Fully understand that God's grace cannot be earned, only received as a free gift through Jesus's work on the cross.Live in such a way that their actions reflect a deep, active faith in him.Commit their whole lives to God's will, walking in obedience wherever he leads.If you'd like to follow along you can get your printed copy here, and be sure to join us here on the podcast every Monday through the end of May for guided prayer and reflection that follows the journal!Pardon the Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.orgOur Sponsors:* Check out IXL and use my code TODAY for a great deal: https://www.ixl.comPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy
Sep 14
11 min
Cultivating a joyful home
What makes a home joyful?It’s probably not a spotless house, perfectly behaved children, or a mom who never gets overwhelmed. In this episode of Pardon the Mess, Scarlet Hiltibidal talks about what it looks like to cultivate a home marked by joy.Scarlet shares a personal story about her grandmother, Grandma Marlene, and her mom, and the “irrational exuberance” they brought into everyday life. Their ability to delight in ordinary things taught Scarlet something about the kind of atmosphere she wants to cultivate in her own home.But biblical joy isn't something we manufacture by trying harder to be happy. The joy of the Lord is our strength. Our joy ultimately comes from knowing who God is and what He has done for us in Christ.Scarlet talks about the difference between creating a happy home and cultivating a joyful one—and offers practical ways moms can make room for delight, celebration, laughter, repentance, and grace in their families.Thank you, Shari Wilson, for joining us on this week’s Messy Mom Moment, to share your wisdom about cultivating a joyful home!Scripture mentioned:Nehemiah 8:1–12Nehemiah 8:10Galatians 5:22–23Connect with ScarletIf this episode encouraged you, would you take a minute to subscribe, leave a review, and share it with another mom who's trying to faithfully point her kids to Jesus. You can connect with Scarlet on Instagram and find her books, Bible studies, and more encouragement at scarlethiltibidal.com.Resources:Calming Your Anxious ChildThe Melody of GraceSign up for Morning MinuteGet your copy of our latest prayer journal and join me each Monday (beginning September 14th) to listen to guided prayer and reflection that follows the journal: Faith in Action: Prayers from James for the Next GenerationConnect with Pardon The Mess:Christian ParentingPardon The MessScarlet’s InstagramScarlet’s FacebookPrefer video? This episode is on YouTube!Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.orgOur Sponsors:* Check out IXL and use my code TODAY for a great deal: https://www.ixl.comPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy
Sep 10
25 min
I don’t know how to fight the lies I believe
Motherhood can make us believe some pretty convincing lies.I’m messing up my kids.Everyone else is doing this better than I am.If my child is struggling, I must be failing.I need to be a better mom before I can feel okay about myself.In this episode of Pardon the Mess, Scarlet Hiltibidal brings the listeners in, talking about the specific lies you might easily believe about yourself, your children, and your motherhood—and what happens when we start answering those lies with the truth of God’s Word.Rather than trying to become moms who never struggle with fear, comparison, guilt, or insecurity, we can learn to recognize the lies we're believing and bring them into the light of Scripture. The gospel reminds us that our identity isn't determined by how well we parent, how our kids behave, or how we compare to the mom next to us. Our hope is in Jesus, who has already done what we could never do for ourselves.Scarlet also shares practical ways to fight these mental battles with biblical truth, remembering that God's grace meets us right in the middle of our messy motherhood.Thank you, listeners, for being part of this week’s “Messy Mom Moment” by sharing (via Scarlet’s Instagram question) the lies you battle.Scripture FocusEphesians 2:8-91 Corinthians 3:6-7Romans 8:1Galatians 6Hebrews 12Connect with ScarletIf this episode encouraged you, would you take a minute to subscribe, leave a review, and share it with another mom who's trying to faithfully point her kids to Jesus. You can connect with Scarlet on Instagram and find her books, Bible studies, and more encouragement at scarlethiltibidal.com.Resources:Calming Your Anxious ChildThe Melody of GraceGO BibleSign up for Morning MinuteGet your copy of our latest prayer journal and join me each Monday (beginning September 14th) to listen to guided prayer and reflection that follows the journal: Faith in Action: Prayers from James for the Next GenerationConnect with Pardon The Mess:Christian ParentingPardon The MessScarlet’s InstagramScarlet’s FacebookPrefer video? This episode is on YouTube!Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.orgOur Sponsors:* Check out IXL and use my code TODAY for a great deal: https://www.ixl.comPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy
Sep 3
31 min
Can Moms Love Like Jesus and Still Have Boundaries?
In this episode, Scarlet Hiltibidal (and her sister, Aubrey Fuhrman) talk about the tension many moms feel between loving sacrificially and setting healthy boundaries. Through an honest conversation about motherhood, family, and faith, they explore how boundaries are not about keeping people out, they are about creating space to love others well.Scarlet and Aubrey discuss the importance of inviting Jesus into our decisions, especially when navigating seasons of change like new motherhood. Aubrey shares her experience of setting boundaries around visits after having a baby and how those boundaries actually helped her love others more intentionally.This conversation offers encouragement for moms who struggle with guilt when saying no, reminding us that biblical love is not measured by constant availability, but by faithfulness to what God has called us to in each season.In This EpisodeBoundaries are not about loving people less; they are about loving people wisely.Healthy boundaries create room to be present, joyful, and intentional with the people God has entrusted to us.Following Jesus means bringing Him into our decisions instead of simply reacting to guilt, expectations, or pressure.Sacrificial love does not mean saying yes to everything or neglecting the responsibilities God has given us.Prayer and Scripture help us discern when to open our hands and when to create wise limits.Scripture FocusMark 1:35–38 Matthew 22:37–39Connect with ScarletIf this episode encouraged you, would you take a minute to subscribe, leave a review, and share it with another mom who's trying to faithfully point her kids to Jesus. You can connect with Scarlet on Instagram and find more resources, Bible studies, and encouragement at scarlethiltibidal.com.Resources:Boundaries BookSign up for Morning MinuteGet your copy of our latest prayer journal and join me each Monday (beginning September 14th) to listen to guided prayer and reflection that follows the journal: Faith in Action: Prayers from James for the Next Generation Connect with Pardon The Mess:Christian ParentingPardon The MessScarlet’s InstagramScarlet’s FacebookPrefer video? This episode is on YouTube!Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.orgOur Sponsors:* Check out IXL and use my code TODAY for a great deal: https://www.ixl.comPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy
Aug 27
38 min
I Don’t Want to Do Motherhood Alone
Motherhood is beautiful, but it can also feel isolating. In this episode, Scarlet Hiltibidal shares why moms need gospel-centered community and how God often works through the people He places around us. Through personal stories of seasons when she pulled away from others in pain and waited until she felt “bright and shiny” again before showing up, Scarlet explores the freedom that comes from being known, loved, and supported in the middle of the mess.Drawing from Psalm 107 and the call to “tell of the Lord’s goodness,” Scarlet encourages moms to share their stories of God’s faithfulness, not because our stories are perfect, but because they point to a perfect Savior. She offers practical encouragement for finding community through the local church, small groups, and intentional relationships that remind us we were never meant to do motherhood alone.Special thanks to Lacey Garner, who came and shared a so-encouraging story of God being actively involved in her life at a family vacation in an Air B&B!In This Episode:Why gospel community is essential in motherhoodHow isolation keeps moms from experiencing God’s provision through othersSharing our stories of God’s faithfulness, even when life is messyPractical steps for finding and nurturing gospel-centered friendshipsThe role of the local church and small groups in supporting momsLiving out the gospel in everyday conversationsKey ScripturePsalm 107:1-9Proverbs 3:5-6Connect with ScarletIf this episode encouraged you, would you take a minute to subscribe, leave a review, and share it with another mom who's trying to faithfully point her kids to Jesus?You can connect with Scarlet on Instagram and find more resources, Bible studies, and encouragement at scarlethiltibidal.com.Resources:Elisabeth Elliot Get your copy of our latest prayer journal: Faith in Action: Prayers from James for the Next Generation and join me each Monday (beginning September 14th) to listen to guided prayer and reflection that follows the journal!Sign up for Morning MinuteConnect with Pardon The Mess:Christian ParentingPardon The MessScarlet’s InstagramScarlet’s FacebookPrefer video? This episode is on YouTube!Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.orgOur Sponsors:* Check out IXL and use my code TODAY for a great deal: https://www.ixl.comPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy
Aug 20
28 min
I Worry That My Anxiety is Affecting My Kids
What if my anxiety is affecting my kids?It’s a question many moms quietly ask themselves. In this episode, Scarlet Hiltibidal shares a personal story from her own motherhood journey and the fear that she might pass her anxiety on to her children.Scarlet talks about a moment when she realized that her biggest struggle wasn’t just anxiety itself, it was what she believed about God. When we don’t trust that God is good, our fears can take over. But when we understand the character of our loving Father, we can begin to release the impossible burden of trying to control every outcome for our kids.Through Scripture, honest reflection, and personal experience, Scarlet encourages moms that the goal isn’t to become a fearless mom, it’s to become a mom who knows where to take her fears, because our children don’t need perfect, anxiety-free moms. They need moms who point them to the perfect love and faithfulness of Jesus, even when they feel weak.In This Episode:The story behind Scarlet’s fear that getting closer to God might lead to something terrible happening to her childrenHow anxiety can distort our view of God’s characterWhy the root of anxiety is often a struggle to trust God’s goodnessThe guilt moms feel when they worry their anxiety is affecting their kidsHow honesty about our struggles can actually help our children see faith lived outWhy we don’t have to become fearless moms, we can become moms who trust God with our fearsKey Scriptures:Matthew 6:25–26 — Jesus reminds us that our heavenly Father cares for His children.Matthew 7:11 — If earthly parents know how to give good gifts, how much more can we trust our good Father?Resources:Afraid of All the ThingsThe Maker of the MountainThe Adventure BibleI Love You, Little LightFaith in Action: Prayers from James for the Next GenerationSign up for Morning MinuteConnect with Pardon The Mess:Christian ParentingPardon The MessScarlet’s InstagramScarlet’s FacebookPrefer video? This episode is on YouTube!Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.orgOur Sponsors:* Check out IXL and use my code TODAY for a great deal: https://www.ixl.comPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy
Aug 13
27 min
I Don’t Know How to Help My Kids Love Church
If you've ever wrestled a toddler through the church doors, bribed your kids with donuts to make it through the service, or wondered if anything they're hearing is actually sticking—you are not alone.In this episode, Scarlet sits down with her pastor-husband, Brandon Hiltibidal, for an honest conversation about one of the biggest questions Christian parents ask: How can we help our kids love the church?The answer isn't found in creating the perfect kids' ministry or making church endlessly entertaining. More often, it begins with the way we, as parents, view and love Christ's bride.Listen in to hear practical, gospel-centered ways to cultivate a love for the local church in your family while helping your kids understand that church is much more than a weekly event.In This Episode:Why your attitude toward church shapes your children's view more than you realize.The difference between raising church attenders and raising kids who love God's people.Why church should feel like family, not just another Sunday activity.How to help your children build meaningful relationships within the church.How to talk with your kids when they notice hypocrisy, conflict, or failures in church leaders.Why the gospel gives us hope even when people in the church disappoint us.Personal stories of how the church cared for the Hiltibidal family during seasons of adoption, hardship, and celebration.Scripture FocusActs 2Hebrews 10:24–25If this episode encouraged you, would you take a minute to subscribe, leave a review, and share it with another mom who's trying to faithfully point her kids to Jesus?You can connect with Scarlet on Instagram and find more resources, Bible studies, and encouragement at scarlethiltibidal.com.Resources:The Maker of the MountainThe Adventure BibleFaith in Action: Prayers from James for the Next GenerationSign up for Morning MinuteConnect with Pardon The Mess:Christian ParentingPardon The MessScarlet’s InstagramScarlet’s FacebookPrefer video? This episode is on YouTube!Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.orgOur Sponsors:* Check out IXL and use my code TODAY for a great deal: https://www.ixl.comPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy
Aug 6
23 min
I Feel Like I’m Losing Myself in Motherhood
Have you ever looked in the mirror and wondered, Who even am I anymore?Motherhood is beautiful, sacred, and deeply meaningful, but it can also feel all-consuming. Somewhere between diaper changes, school pickups, endless laundry, and caring for everyone else, it's easy to lose sight of who you are.In this episode, Scarlet Hiltibidal shares honestly about what it feels like to lose yourself in motherhood and why the answer isn't finding your "old self" again, but anchoring your identity in Jesus. Through personal stories, biblical encouragement, and practical rhythms, you'll be reminded that your worth isn't found in your productivity, your parenting, or your season of life. It's found in Jesus..If you've been feeling unseen, overwhelmed, or like you've disappeared beneath the title of "Mom," this conversation is for you.Special thanks to Katie Hinson, who shared her own experience with this for this week's Messy Mom Moment!If this episode encouraged you, be sure to subscribe, leave a positive review, and share it with a friend who may need hope today.In this episode:Why so many moms feel like they've lost themselvesThe difference between your role as a mom and your identity in ChristThe importance of friendship and Christian communityKey ScriptureColossians 3:1-4Ephesians 2:10Resources:You are Not Forgotten by Christine HooverThe Adventure BibleBridging ResilienceFaith in Action: Prayers from James for the Next GenerationSign up for Morning MinuteFirst15Connect with Pardon The Mess:Get to know Scarlet hereChristian ParentingPardon The MessScarlet’s InstagramScarlet’s FacebookJoin the Pardon the Mess community by subscribing and leaving a review!Prefer video? This episode is on YouTube!Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.orgOur Sponsors:* Check out IXL and use my code TODAY for a great deal: https://www.ixl.comPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy
Jul 30
29 min
Homeschool, Public, or Private...How Do I Choose?
How do you know you're making the right decision for your kids?Whether you're homeschooling, choosing private school, considering public school, or simply wondering if you're getting this whole parenting thing right, the pressure can feel overwhelming. In this episode, Scarlet Hiltibidal reminds us that while parenting comes with countless decisions, our greatest calling isn't to engineer the perfect childhood—it's to faithfully point our children to Jesus.Through biblical encouragement and practical wisdom, Scarlet shares how Scripture shapes our approach to discipleship at home, why prayer and wise counsel matter, and how resting in God's sovereignty frees us from the burden of believing everything depends on us.In this episode, you'll hear:What the Bible says about discipling our children in everyday life.Why God's Word should be woven into the rhythms of your home.How to seek wisdom through prayer, Scripture, and godly counsel when making educational decisions.The freedom that comes from remembering you are called to point your children to Jesus—not save them.How trusting God's sovereignty brings peace in every parenting season.Key ScripturesProverbs 3:5–6Deuteronomy 6Key TakeawaysGod's Word is meant to shape the everyday rhythms of family life.Parenting is about faithful discipleship, not perfect outcomes.Every family and every season is unique—seek God's wisdom rather than someone else's formula.Prayer and biblical wisdom should guide every major parenting decision.God is already at work in your child's life, and you can trust Him with what you cannot control.Special thanks to Ever, Scarlet’s 15-year-old, who shared her own experience with this for this week's Messy Mom Moment!If this episode encouraged you, be sure to subscribe, leave a positive review, and share it with a friend who may need hope today.Prefer video? This episode is on YouTube!Resources:The Adventure BibleCozy Earth (use code PARDONTHEMESS for up to 20% off! And if you get a Post-Purchase Survey, make sure to let them know you heard about Cozy Earth right here!)Bridging ResilienceGet your copy of Faith in Action: Prayers from James for the Next Generation today!Get to know Scarlet hereSign up for Morning MinuteSeeds Kids WorshipConnect with Pardon The Mess:Christian ParentingPardon The MessScarlet’s InstagramScarlet’s FacebookPardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.orgOur Sponsors:* Check out IXL and use my code TODAY for a great deal: https://www.ixl.comPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy
Jul 23
34 min
Summer is Long…What Do I Do With My Kids?
Summer always seems to come with big expectations. We imagine memory-making adventures, endless family fun, and kids who magically never complain. But somewhere between snack requests, screen-time negotiations, and trying to keep everyone occupied, many of us end up wondering if we're doing enough.In this episode, Scarlet Hiltibidal shares why the best summer isn't necessarily the busiest one. Instead, she explores how the gospel frees us from the pressure to create a "perfect" summer and invites us to faithfully enjoy the ordinary moments God has already given us.You'll also hear from special guest Anna Van Dyke, who shares simple, practical rhythms that have helped her family cultivate faith, connection, and joy throughout the summer.Whether you're staying home, traveling, or just trying to survive another hot afternoon with your kids, this episode will encourage you to embrace intentionality over perfection and remember that God is already at work in the everyday moments.In This EpisodeWhy summer can leave moms feeling overwhelmedHow the gospel frees us from the pressure to create a "perfect" childhoodSimple spiritual rhythms your family can build into everyday lifePractical ideas for creating meaningful summer memories without overschedulingFinding joy in the ordinary instead of chasing extraordinary momentsScripture FocusColossians 3:17Luke 10:38-42Special thanks to Anna Van Dyke who shared her own experience with this for this week's Messy Mom Moment!If this episode encouraged you, be sure to subscribe, leave a positive review, and share it with a friend who may need hope today.Prefer video? This episode is on YouTube!Resources:The Adventure BibleCozy Earth (use code PARDONTHEMESS for up to 20% off! And if you get a Post-Purchase Survey, make sure to let them know you heard about Cozy Earth right here!)Get your copy of Faith in Action: Prayers from James for the Next Generation today!Get to know Scarlet hereSign up for Morning MinuteConnect with Pardon The Mess:Christian ParentingPardon The MessScarlet’s InstagramScarlet’s FacebookPardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.orgOur Sponsors:* Check out IXL and use my code TODAY for a great deal: https://www.ixl.comPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy
Jul 16
30 min
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