110: How to Dismantle Patriarchy Through Parenting
Published April 13, 2020
58 min
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    We began this mini-series a few weeks ago as listener Brian Stout and I co-interviewed Dr. Carol Gilligan as an introduction to the topic of patriarchy (https://yourparentingmojo.com/captivate-podcast/patriarchy/) , how it is present in every aspect of raising our children, and the negative impacts it has on our children's lives - both on boys and girls. The interview with Dr. Gilligan laid the groundwork for us, and in this episode Brian and I are back for a conversation about what we learned and what implications this has for the way we will raise our children. We discuss: - Why Brian, a cisgendered, heterosexual white male - an apparent beneficiary of patriarchal systems - is so interested in dismantling it - Some of the specific ways we parents perpetuate patriarchy through our parenting, even if we don't realize we're doing it! - Why 'masculine' qualities like logic are prized over 'feminine' qualities like understanding the physical experience of the body and recognizing emotions (and why it's ridiculous that these qualities are gendered in the first place) - How patriarchy hurts men (mentally, emotionally, and physically) as well as women - Brian's top four conclusions and actions to take to begin the work of dismantling patriarchy in our own families (and, by extension, in society more broadly) [accordion] [accordion-item title="Click here to read the full transcript"] Jen:                                        01:25 (https://www.temi.com/editor/t/PVUClxb5Z7pirdSKNQwq4L4rqj8ScPjauY_XMaz1sf-50GNBUzpnV11rwec20jPqZzJxDBf2pOW_c0pgpy_JkZkYMYw?loadFrom=DocumentDeeplink&ts=85.91)                     Hello and welcome to the Your Parenting Mojo podcast. Today's episode is a followup that my guest today, Brian Stout and I did recently with Dr. Carol Gilligan on the topic of patriarchy and if you aren't very familiar with what this is and the role that it plays in our lives as parents then I definitely recommend that you go back and listen to that one before you listen to this episode. And I'm glad today that we have a bit more time in this interview for me to properly introduce my guest whose name is Brian Stout. And as with so many of the topics that we've covered related to privilege and social systems, patriarchy is kind of one of those things I might never have considered as relevant to parenting and child development if someone hadn't helped me to draw that connection. And the connection was drawn in a really roundabout way. Jen:                                        02:09 (https://www.temi.com/editor/t/PVUClxb5Z7pirdSKNQwq4L4rqj8ScPjauY_XMaz1sf-50GNBUzpnV11rwec20jPqZzJxDBf2pOW_c0pgpy_JkZkYMYw?loadFrom=DocumentDeeplink&ts=129.08)                     Brian actually first reached out to me because he had read a series of blog posts that I'd written on how to do a 10-day hike around Mont Blanc with my then 8-week-old daughter. And he wanted more information because he was planning to do a similar trip with his wife and daughter. And we've kept in touch on and off over the years. But it wasn't until recently that I learned a lot more about his work at the intersection of progressive philanthropy and social justice movements. And so Brian holds a BA in Interdisciplinary Studies from Amherst College and a Master's in International Relations from Johns Hopkins and he has a background in...
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