I think we can all agree that marriage is hard. It is also awesome. But it does not come without intentional work. It’s easy to glorify other people's' marriages and assume they “have it all” when that is never actually the case.
I recently read Michelle Obama’s book, Becoming. Then I went as saw her speak here in Seattle. In both instances, I was touched by the way she talks about marriage and essentially the “secrets” of her marriage.
She is married to a dreamer, while she is admittedly much more pragmatic. She is married to someone who wants to serve all the people, while she wants to prioritize serving her family and those closest to her. She is married to someone who can’t manage his time to save his life, while she loves structure and schedules and routine (and being on time for it all)!
In reading Michelle’s book and hearing her talk, I was able to curate four secrets to a successful marriage that I think will help all the rest of us:
- Set clear boundaries and expectations
- Assume your partners have the best intentions
- Assume your partner can actually do the things they say they can
- Shamelessly build, own, and grow your own identity
Listen in for a deep dive on these concepts around marriage (and to learn how to see your partners' most annoying characteristics as gifts)!
AND make sure to stick around for the end when we talk about asking for support rather than permission. This is a game changer in how you can maintain your identity as well as a high level of respect and equity in your marriage.
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