The Meg-John & Justin Podcast

As you may have been hearing on recent podcasts, I’ve been training in solution focused therapy / coaching recently. I’ve been finding it pretty transformational, both for me personally but I’ve also found it really useful in work too. It’s a very postmodern practice, in that it just works. In the training that I’ve attended the trainers have been disinterested in the theory, or why it works. Their response is that it does, and here’s how we do it. That’s good enough for me, I really enjoyed getting cracking with it and trying it out on lots of my loved ones before doing coaching with paying clients. However, I have a podcast to run and I need that content baby! So what is the deal with solution focused therapy and what’s the theory behind it? [for the full blog post that I read out here head over to the Patreon where I've unlocked it https://www.patreon.com/posts/70372857 ] If you’re interested in booking a session with me (Patrons get 10% discount) check out the coaching page at justinhancock.co.uk If you want to have a session with someone who isn’t me, I can recommend Biba (who I’ve had some sessions with too). She’s great https://ribalon.org/ If you’re interested in getting some training yourself, I’d recommend the courses at Brief, which is where I’ve been training. https://www.brief.org.uk/ To help with this I’ve been reading How to Read Wittgenstein by Ray Monk and Ludwig Wittgenstein by Edward Kanterian (part of the Critical Lives series). This article by Steve de Shazer is really interesting (and helpful) https://www.sdstate.edu/sites/default/files/2018-06/dont_think_but_observe.pdf The Stanford Encyclopedia of Philosophy came up trumps again with their excellent entry (such an amazing resource) https://plato.stanford.edu/entries/wittgenstein/ The Wikipedia page for solution focused therapy is packed with links to the evidence for how effective it is https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Solution-focused_brief_therapy If you want to understand what I meant by postmodern check out this podcast by Jeremy Gilbert (when Liz Truss was having a go at postmodernism, obviously she didn’t understand what that meant)

Latest episode is an expanded version of some of the stuff I've been writing lately for BISH (my website for over 14s) and for Mashable which you can read here https://mashable.com/article/porn-sites-viewers-workers For a blog post of this article you can head to the Patreon https://www.patreon.com/posts/72285998 and while you're there please considering supporting the show. Just £1 a month would really help out. If everyone who listened did that then I could work for 2/5 of a week on it. If you want more anti or post-capitalist content check out the work of my comrades at ALE https://www.alternativeleftentertainment.org/

Yes we're back with another Sex Jams and we're back with another George Michael song. Perhaps the horniest of his songs. Freeek! We're doing Freeek! 04 and the video is here https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VLnYPXTs9LY Patrons support the show and also get bits of bonus material, including the full length version of this podcast. Just £1 a month would support the show. If everyone who listened did this I'd be able to work for a day or two a week on this show!

CN - I don't go into detail about abuse but the whole episode is (as the title suggests) about the relationship between what kink might do (for some people) and previous experiences of abuse. For the full blog post that goes with the episode, sign up at the Patreon and support the show. Or if you can't afford that but want to read the post, email me at culturesexrelationships at gmail dot com and I'll send it to you.

NB: it's 29th July 2022, so if you listen to this in a few weeks time you might want to check out my article at BISH below just in case the advice changes. Here's a quick episode about monkeypox: it's a chill and informative explainer. It's based on the article I wrote at BISH https://www.bishuk.com/safer-sex/monkeypox/ and also in the article I wrote for Mashable https://mashable.com/article/monkeypox-symptoms-signs-safety The links I mentioned are in those articles but also here are a few more https://www.nhs.uk/conditions/monkeypox/ https://www.nejm.org/doi/full/10.1056/NEJMoa2207323 https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/abs/pii/S147330992200411X?dgcid=coauthor https://www.who.int/news-room/fact-sheets/detail/monkeypox https://www.cdc.gov/poxvirus/monkeypox/index.html This twitter thread is really useful too https://twitter.com/mugecevik/status/1550757056256294912 And here's my article about how to worry https://www.bishuk.com/about-you/how-to-worry/ Justin

Here's the latest episode of Sex Jams with Dr Eleanor Janega and me, discussing a sex jam. Here is the video https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rrbFQEcpJ3A We talk about pretty interesting stuff. Why the ideal Sex Jam is actually John Cage. Two seed theory. How liberal notions of the self and sexuality come from the classical and medieval notions of sex and sexuality. What is cream? The mirror phase. (Sexual) subjectivity. And having the horn. Eleanor's blog is https://going-medieval.com/ her other podcast is called We're No So Different https://feeds.transistor.fm/were-not-so-different and if you want to watch her on TV check out her seriess on History Hit https://access.historyhit.com/videos/medieval-pleasures-sex You can see the rest of her stuff here https://linktr.ee/EleanorJanega I offer an advice / solution focused coaching service about sex, relationships, and you. So if you find my advice on here useful you might want to book me for a session. More details here https://justinhancock.co.uk/#coaching https://linktr.ee/culturesexrel

Here's an interview with Cory Cascalheira who was the lead writer of an academic paper called 'Curative Kink: Survivors of early abuse transform trauma through BDSM'. It's open access and I'd encourage you to read it because it's well interesting and I think very important. https://www.researchgate.net/publication/352440982_Curative_kink_Survivors_of_early_abuse_transform_trauma_through_BDSM I say more about this in the introduction, but we're not saying that Kink is a prescription for dealing with trauma from sexual abuse, or neglect, or violence. It's to say, for people who take part in Kink, in the context of cultural healing, what does kink offer people therapeutically. Support this show via patreon.com/culturesexrelationships You can also support https://www.bishuk.com (one of the most popular and widely respected websites for young people) at patreon.com/bishuk Or if you want to find out about all the other work I do, including one to one sessions for solution focused coaching or sex and relationships advice, head to https://justinhancock.co.uk/

I chatted with Alfie Bown about his really superb new book Dream Lovers the Gamification of Relationships. It's packed with interesting ideas and theory but is also highly readable and fun. I learnt tons. I chat about the book in the introduction but you can also read more about it (and buy it if you can) at the Pluto Books website https://www.plutobooks.com/9780745344874/dream-lovers/ If you like the show please consider supporting it from £1 a month at patreon.com/culturesexrelationships and you might also want to check out my website justinhancock.co.uk to see about other projects I work on and to find out more about my new coaching service.

Here's an article that I wrote for my Patrons at patreon.com/culturesexrelationships and I've read out here. If you want to read the article then I've unlocked the post which you can find here https://www.patreon.com/posts/65416473 Please do consider supporting the show via Patreon or you can also find out about and support my other work, which you can see at my new website https://justinhancock.co.uk

As I say in the introduction, I was thinking about her work when I was learning about the Sexuality Assemblage. https://www.researchgate.net/publication/258032851_The_Sexuality-Assemblage_Desire_Affect_Anti-Humanism This comes from the Deleuze and Guattari idea of the 'body without organs' which is just to say that our bodies and selves exist only in relation to (and becoming of) other humans, ideas, memories, fantasies, environments, objects and that these all exist in an affective flow. I learnt about this from The Body by Nick J Fox. We discussed this in the Sex Consent and Justice episode with Tina Sikka in December last year. Don't worry if this sounds academic and technical, hopefully the conversation is pretty inclusive and straight forward and fun! If you want an intro to this you might like this module of the Teach Yourself Sex Ed course I did for my website for young people. https://www.bishuk.com/parents/teach-yourself-sex-ed-bodies/ You can check out GotN's work at https://www.girlonthenet.com/ and you can support her audio prn project and her writing at her Patreon https://www.patreon.com/girlonthenet This conversation has been out for a couple of weeks now on both of our Patreons. So do consider signing up to both of our Patreons to support the work. If you can't afford it, no worries. If you can share it on social media that would be great too.