A short-form, once-monthly alternative to The Heart of Jacks Podcast’s interview, Fourth Monday brings listener feedback, supporter shout-outs, updates on the forthcoming book, The Heart of Jacks, The History and Culture of Jack-Off Clubs, and previews of upcoming episodes in a sleek, ad-free package.
Rick Laska is a clinical social worker and certified sex therapist in the Twin Cities Metro Area in Minnesota. He has been involved in the field of sexual health and wellness for over 2 decades. He is passionate about pleasure, intimacy, and connection as well as overcoming the oppressive forces trying to stifle those things. Paul and Rick talk about his path to social work and sex therapy, and dive into the fundamentals of sexual mindfulness and tantra. But first, Paul wants to talk to you about your "Bate/Life Balance," how adults who masturbate frequently balance this part of their lives with everything else being a grownup requires of us. It may sound like an odd topic, but the extension of our cultural reticence with regard to masturbation can leave people in a "denial/release" cycle of cutting out self-pleasure followed by periods of sacrificing everything else. Paul is looking for guest suggestions to chew on this topic of making healthy self-pleasuring a balanced part of our adult lives.
Originally from Kansas, David Quantic has lived in Texas, New York and in 1999 he moved to L.A. to attend UCLA’s MFA Film Production/Directing program, graduating in 2004. He worked freelance in the L.A. film industry in production and post-production until 2016 when he moved to Seattle to work for the Queer Film Festival. He has been producing the Fruitbowl documentary and podcast series since 2018. Fruitbowl is an oral history of queer sex. Each episode of the podcast features one person describing their coming of age and how they discovered their sexual preferences. In this interview, we talk about Fruitbowl Podcast; its accidental genesis and its uniquely real and human take on queer sex. We also talk about Rain City Jacks (where we met), me being on his podcast and about the differences between jack-off clubs and (other) sex clubs.
In segment 1, Paul talks about how he learned about sex before most of his friends did (hint: It wasn’t from his parents or school) and about the ways that queer kids learn nothing at all about sex or relationships and are left to kludge their lives together without guidance, a monologue inspired by his conversation with today’s guest. For the interview, Paul talks with Dr. Eric Sprankle. Dr. Sprankle is an Associate Professor of Clinical Psychology and Co-Director of the Sexuality Studies program at Minnesota State University, Mankato, as well as a licensed clinical psychologist and an AASECT-certified sex therapist affiliated with the Minnesota Sexual Health Institute. He joins Paul to talk about shame and sexual shame. Questions that we chewed on: What is shame? Is sexual shame unique from other kinds of shame? Where does sexual shame and overall sex negativity come from? Is shame ever a good thing? What’s a good alternative focus? What's behind the cultural pressure to feel shame? Is the rise of secularism alone a solution to sexual shame?
Why interview men who go to jack-off clubs? Paul gets into his thinking around all of these conversations with men who have discovered the Jacks and why it’s valuable to tell a big story with a lot of little ones. Tim is a member and volunteer at Rain City Jacks and has also visited other similar clubs since discovering RCJ.
Paul’s back and mining memes for inspiration and reminding everyone that the most productive means to generating “happiness chemicals” is making love… or having sex… of any kind… with anyone including oneself. Then Paul is joined by Dr. Joe Kort, Licensed Sex and Relationship Therapist, to talk about coming out kinky, “side guys” and our perennial favorite topic, straight guys into penis play… with other guys’ penises. Paul’s happy to welcome new sponsor, the Woodhull Freedom Foundation.
Sophia Sky is Sophia Iannicelli, Executive Director of the Pan Eros Foundation and Festival Director of the Seattle Erotic Art Festival. Paul and Sophia chat about the activism of erotic art, how to understand the vast sex-positive community of Seattle, and all the ways she is a part of it. It’s a fun, loose conversation with one of my favorite people about some of my favorite topics. This final episode of 2020 looks forward to a VERY new year to come. Paul is taking a break after this one, just for a couple of weeks, as he recovers from surgery and gets a few more conversations ready for you. You can find The Heart of Jacks Project on Twitter @theheartofjacks Please take a moment to rate and review the podcast at Apple Podcasts and help thousands of new listeners find the show. Thank you for your support and I will see you in 2021!
Dec 28, 2020
Before the bupivacaine wears off and the first dose of painkillers kick in, just after that first post-op cup of coffee, there’s a sweet window of opportunity to knock out a quick non-episode so your ears aren’t lonely on Solstice morning. Rather than post an oh-so-close-but-as-yet-unfinished episode of the podcast, I made this End of 2020 support pitch on the fly, a standalone semi-show to remind you that I love you, that I’m really doing just fine (even if I did just have my third orthopedic surgery of the year just this morning) and to highlight three important things I need for the health of this podcast: 1. You really should listen to the episodes you missed. 2. I need more Patreon patrons and there’s a sneaky way to make just one payment. 3. I urgently need more ratings and reviews on Apple Podcasts. If you’re enjoying the show but not yet a patron, please consider supporting the project by going to patreon.com/theheartofjacks and contributing what you can either monthly or annually. New subscribers get two free months with an *annual* subscription through February 2021. Really, the best thing you can do for any podcaster is to help increase their visibility on Apple Podcasts! Please take a minute to find The Heart of Jacks Podcast on Apple Podcasts, rate and review the show. In fact, consider doing that for every podcast you love. If you can’t contribute your hard-earned cash to the cause, you can help other listeners hear the shows you love and that is the Holy Grail for every podcaster. Thank you for all you’ve done already to put The Heart of Jacks Podcast into more than 2,500 sets of ears in just three months. That’s over 5,000 ears!
Dec 21, 2020
Michael, a listener in San Francisco wants to know how I know who the straight members of the Jacks are. I give him my take on it and my reason for approaching member sexual orientation the way I do, and then I call in a lifeline in the form of Dr. David Ley, clinical psychologist and sex therapist (you may have seen him on TV or heard him on radio or other podcasts before) and Dr. Ley shares his take… "It's complicated." Tyler The Bad Wolf. Guest, Tyler Darlig Ulv's last name literally translates from the Norwegian as "bad wolf." Tyler is a professional sex worker living in Berlin, a writer, designer and blogger and an ex-New Yorker who I met at NY Jacks. He made an impression and we became friends. I'm thrilled to share our conversation with you. We talk about sex work, NY Jacks, the awesomeness of masturbation and Kylie Minogue!
Dec 14, 2020
1 hr 3 min
Paul is back in the podcast saddle after four weeks of recovery from surgery and ready to talk Shakespeare, the gift of LGBTQ+ people to the world and, more than anything, the importance of being honest. Hezekiah has been to JO clubs all over the world and has a lot to share about body image, nudity, authenticity and masturbation as a primary source of sexual satisfaction. A tribute to Allena Gabosch who died on November 25, 2020. She was a friend, a mentor and the very first guest on The Heart of Jacks Podcast, episode #1.
Dec 7, 2020