In this episode, we meet Simon, a 51-year-old former Jehovah's Witness who was born into the organization during the height of the 1975 end-times hysteria. Growing up in a "biosphere of fear" in Quebec, Simon recounts a childhood defined by apocalyptic imagery, Holocaust-themed propaganda, and the intense pressure to conform to a "misfit" family dynamic that prioritized religious survival over individual identity. He takes us through his formative years—from his baptism at 17 to a 25-year marriage that ultimately dissolved when his pursuit of truth collided with the organization's rigid demand for loyalty.

The narrative reaches a turning point when Simon confronts the systemic rot within the organization, including the discovery of an elder who had assaulted 22 women in a single congregation, only to be reinstated and sent to Simon's home. Simon discusses the specific mental health toll on men within the Watchtower, describing a "treadmill" of performance that leads to chronic depression and emasculation. Now living authentically after a pivotal sabbatical in Mexico, Simon shares how reclaiming his voice and listening to his "inner voice" led to a life of peace, clarity, and deep connection with his daughter, who also escaped the group.

Key Takeaways

• The "North Star" of Truth: Simon explains that the very tools the organization gave him—a high respect for "The Truth"—eventually became his way out once he began to apply critical thinking and honest research to the group's own history and policies.
• Institutional Betrayal and Safety: A major catalyst for Simon's exit was the organization's failure to protect its members, highlighted by the "prolific" scandal of a predatory elder whose crimes were overlooked while the victims remained unprotected.
• The Psychological Treadmill for Men: Simon highlights the unique burden on men to be "beta males" who are compliant and self-sacrificing, which often results in a chronic loss of agency and deep-seated depression.
• The Body Knows: Simon encourages those in high-control groups to pay attention to physical symptoms—such as anxiety, depression, or a "lack of peace"—as these are often the body's way of demanding to be heard when the mind is being gaslit.
• "Who's on My Bench?": Through his disassociation letter, Simon found clarity by forcing his social circle to take a stand, allowing him to distinguish between superficial, conditional connections and real, solid relationships.

Direct Quotes

• "Reality wins. You know, like you can keep your head in the sand and have your delusions and hang on tight to them, but you know, the longer it goes on, the higher the consequences… and in the end, reality wins."
• "If I could encourage anybody out there that's questioning… listen to your body and what it's telling to you… your body will demand to be heard sooner or later."
• "I needed to know going into the third period of my life who's on my bench and who's not… I don't have any more resources, time, attention, space for shallow relationships."

Resources Mentioned

• ExJwHelp.com (Cult recovery coaching and resources)
• RAADS-R test (Screening tool related to autism and social interaction)
• Shunned Podcast (Lived experience and deconstruction episodes)
• Insight on the Scriptures and Bound Volumes
• Revelation—Its Grand Climax at Hand! (The "Revelation book")
• Australian Royal Commission (ARC)
• Disentangling from Emotionally Immature People (Book)
• ExJW subreddit (Reddit community)
• This JW Life (The host's original podcast story)
• Becoming Jehovah (Free online book by the host)
• patreon.com/shunned (Bonus content and guest connections)

Guest Bio

Simon is a 51-year-old former third-generation Jehovah's Witness and father who reclaimed his agency after five decades in a high-control environment. Now a self-employed professional, he focuses on living a life of peace and clarity while advocating for the importance of mental health and self-validation for those recovering from religious trauma.

Support the show and get bonuses as well by donating to the cause on our Patreon page, Patreon.com/shunned

Are you struggling in some area of life? Feeling stuck? Need an accountability partner or some encouragement? Need to talk to someone that understands cult life? Reach out and let's talk. I have affordable programs to help as a certified life coach with a focus on cult recovery. Click HERE for more information.

Want more resources? Go to my other website exjwHelp.com

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This podcast was made possible by my original podcast This JW Life. You can find it on any podcast app. It is a 9 part series about life as Jehovah's Witnesses designed to help you understand how it worked in one comprehensive story and to help you process your own if you came from that environment.

Read my FREE online book, based on This JW Life, called Becoming Jehovah, in both English and Spanish by clicking here

An ExJW podcast and ExJW YouTube Channel