(Full Notes)Tuesday, November 17, 2020Sometime talk about Freud's subconscious and self-deception.Saturday, November 21, 2020Without looking up what Freud said about the subconscious (it's been a long time), one thing I think that plunges certain things at least into our subconscious is self-deception.  Like when we do perverse things to ourselves and others, it's not the same as some automatic action like blinking or breathing.  No, there's self-deception involved.  It seems to me like self-deception drives stuff like that into our subconscious. The author of my psychology book makes it all sound so innocent, giving as examples of the subconscious times he makes a bad pass in basketball even though he realizes at the last minute it's a bad pass.  Not sure what to make of that.  Or how he acts when he is put under at the dentist's.  I don't know about that, either.  And that's interesting and everything.  But when we do subversive things to ourselves it seems to me it's more perverse than that.  We do it for a reason.  We are looking for an excuse.  I'm not saying it's all conscious.  But you know that's an interesting subject, because some people will say it's all a choice, it's all conscious, basically.  I missed my therapy appointment in NY and Ken said it was because of my false self (not just because I innocently forgot).  I think there's something to that.  Do I selectively forget stuff?  I'm sure I do. I tend to want to disagree with people who say it is a conscious choice all the time.  I guess I don't feel like I experience it that way.  But is there something to that?  Well, seems to me there are more like moments of choice.  Maybe we're in a bind and it's hard to make the right choice or something, or it's become automatic.  I don't know.  But there do seem to be these moments of choice.  I wouldn't say it's every moment, like some people say.  At least I don't experience it that way and I don't think anybody does.  But we do have these moments of choice all the time.  Nor would I say we have no choice, as I suppose some might say.  Determinism, no.  As President Monson said, decisions determine destiny.  We have personal freedom.  We have agency.  We talked about agency earlier.  It's by virtue of us having knowledge, having power to act. Well I obviously don't quite know how to talk about this, this choice stuff.  But people who have maladaptive behavior, who are doing things that hurt themselves, and aren't getting it (and this is all of us), there's a reason we don't get it.  Beyond just habit, though habit is surely a part of it.  Good and evil is involved.  There's a gravity to evil - it sucks us in - it has a pull.  You observe it in the universe and you know something is there, and you postulate a force or some phenomenon to explain it.  (Space-time)  In the case of good and evil you postulate a knowledge that we must have that we go against and thus self-justify.  It's a very logical postulation to me.  Well, plus we have scriptural evidence that it actually exists, the light and the phenomenon that happens when we go against it.  Christ is that light.  It's the light of Christ.  And what do the scriptures say about going against the light?  For every one that doeth evil hateth the light, neither cometh to the light, lest his deeds should be reproved.  (John