Outside of orthodox communities, there’s a trend of boys and men increasingly disengaging from Jewish institutional life. A new article in the winter 2026 Sapir Journal called “Boyz II Mensches” by Adam Teitelbaum sparks the question: does the retreat of boys and men from Jewish communal life mirror a broader societal pattern of male disengagement from civic and religious institutions?

On today’s episode of Not in Heaven, our rabbi podcasters debate Teitelbaum’s proposal to reimagine the bar mitzvah as a multi-year process of growth through age 18 as one of the ways to reclaim meaningful male identity within Jewish life.

Then, the rabbis turn to one of synagogue life’s most beloved and controversial institutions: the Kiddush club. Is it a harmless break and opportunity for male bonding and community-building — or a boozy affront to the sanctity of prayer?

Related stories:

• Read Adam Teitelbaum's article "Boyz II Mensches"

redits

• Hosts: Avi Finegold, Yedida Eisenstat, Matthew Leibl
• Production team: Zachary Judah Kauffman (editor), Michael Fraiman (executive producer)
• Music: Socalled

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