Pat was feeling jolly (lol get it? Xmas?) so Ben regales him with more tales about the expansive ethical theory known as Utilitarianism. Why? Because it's Christmas! Ignore the fact that this episode is 2 days late for that. Because get this: Utilitarianism stipulates that what is good is to increase joy & happiness for the greatest number of people. Especially children! And who's better at that than that fat fuck Santa Claus. You're welcome bitches! Merry Christmas!